Marriage & Divorce - 27 November 2007

A friend of mine is about to separate from his wife. The choice is his although they have both admitted they have problems. We were out for drinks last week and there were three of us whose husbands left for another woman. During our discussion on to divorce or not he asked us that question - do you ever get over the bitterness ? It has been a year and a half for me and even though I feel I have recovered from everything that happened and moved on there is that little part of me that is still bitter and is still angry and hurt. Has anyone ever truly let all the bitterness go? If you did, how did you do it?

2007-11-27 08:22:42 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-11-27 08:21:57 · 47 answers · asked by justme 1

I'm a legally married canadian citizen, but i have a british lover. My british guy wants me to come over and marry him. I don't think my current husband would peacefully agree to a divorce so im thinking about just up and dissapearing on him. If i left my husband here, could i easily marry in the UK and lead a normal life? or would getting married in the UK require them to look into my files/history and make them find out im already married.

2007-11-27 08:20:27 · 9 answers · asked by SadFish 1

Ladies of Alabama ( near Birmingham ), I am an out going guy looking for something new. Any of you willing to do something today?

2007-11-27 08:16:00 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

I waited till I was married to have sex and knew that the first time could hurt but everytime my husband and I try and do the deed, it hurts so bad!! We use lots of lubrication and my husband is very gentle. Also, it is not a problem of me being nervous, not in the mood or not enough foreplay. What is the problem and how can I make it easier?

2007-11-27 08:15:41 · 15 answers · asked by Curious 2

My wife wants a divorce, but I don't. We still live together and I just found out she has a boyfriend (although she denies). Is it still cheating? If it is what can I do?

2007-11-27 08:13:25 · 14 answers · asked by hawk72821 1

I'm still in love her, but I have my doubts if she loves me or just wants to be back with her children.

2007-11-27 08:12:17 · 84 answers · asked by Dan D 1

I mean, when I saw that we were almost done at work I was so excited to see my wife soon I almost peed my pants.

Is there something I can do about this? ...Is it a disease or something?

2007-11-27 08:09:50 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

Ok, folks, I have heard and seen too many questions on YAnswers and in life to not post this...

Lets define cheating: Sexual contact with someone other than your spouse or significant other.
Lets define Marriage: A social, religious, and/or legal contract between two people involving vows that stipulate that the couple will remain monogamous until one dies.

So, it IS cheating if you are bisexual and having sexual contact with a person of your same sex. Even if your spouse knows and is ok with it.
Bisexuality doesn't give you an out clause. EVERYONE wants to have extramarital sex at one time or another. Generally, we don't do it becuase we made vows to our spouses. Words like "unless you're bi" or "Forsaking all others of the opposite sex, but same sex is ok" probably didn't appear in the vows...
So, if you are having sex outside the marriage, you are cheating and you have broken your vows.
Stop asking! If you really thought it was really harmless, you wouldn't have to ask!

2007-11-27 07:54:42 · 17 answers · asked by Melanie J 5

I don't really want dancing at my wedding, but my fiance is very set on the idea. Our wedding will be held at a garden at around 4 PM- 7:30 PM. I'm worried that my guests will be uncomfortable dancing in public in total daylight. Do you think it would be ok to just use the 1st dance and wedding party dances? what are some other alternatives?

2007-11-27 07:46:34 · 25 answers · asked by ceco 1

My husband constantly tries to have some sort of a relationship with his parents, who are extremely emotionally abusive toward him. He gets hurt by them, over and over again, but always ends up running back for more. It hurts our relationship because he's still the little boy trying to please mom and dad, and has blown off the 'leaving and cleaving' to his wife thing. I'm quite sure his parents are not going to change, they are not going to give him the love and affection that he so desperately wants from them, and his obsession with trying to get them to do it is keeping him from moving forward and paying attention to wife and kids.
I feel badly for him, but I'm tired of watching him get kicked over and over again, and of this being such a barrier to our marriage being his main focus. What do I do - let him continue this until it eventually drives me away? Tell him it's got to stop? I've tried to find middle ground but as soon as he's with his parents he becomes obsessed.

2007-11-27 07:42:26 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

I am a teacher, and my husband has been spying on me for a couple of months now. I hear from students and other teachers that he parks in various locations and stares at the school. After dismissal, I used to stay to clean up my classroom, grade papers, etc. Now he only wants me to stay a half hour at the most, and apparently he watches during that time. I am so angry because he has no reason not to trust me. I never spy on him, go through his wallet, look at his cell phone or anything. He won't allow me to have a password on my phone because he says he has the right to check messages and calls at any time. I do not do anything wrong for him to be acting this way. I have asked him to stop, but he says that means I am doing something I don't want him to see. It's not that, just the fact that I feel like I am being stalked by my own husband. Has anyone had a spouse like this? What should I do?

2007-11-27 07:37:10 · 23 answers · asked by Dragonfly23 2

i've been married 13 yrs. husb. has cheated numerous times, me never once. he treats me ok. but his moods change radically. he doesn't see it. im looking for something more but don't want to loose this marriage. i find myself looking to get satisfide elsewhere. at least talking about it alot. i want a dominant man to just take me. im just to scared to do anything i don't know what to do. im unhappy most the time. sexually deprived of what i really want. but am to afraid to actually do anything about it. only reason i don't want the marriage to end is my kids. what do i do? there's no passion left. very little love.

2007-11-27 07:30:49 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-11-27 07:27:11 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

I'm in my 40s but look much younger, like early 30s....slim and fit. Lots of guys in their mid 20s ask me out and to be honest, I usually refuse as I wonder if it is a 'sex experience' for them rather than looking for love. Guys in your 20s, please tell me, can you really be serious about a woman in her mid 40s? Say you get on really well with her? Is it just to sleep with her and then look for a younger girl later on to have children with?

2007-11-27 07:23:39 · 18 answers · asked by this girl wants to know 1

From my previous questions I've told you guys that i'm getting divorced from my husband. The original reason we decided to file divorced was because I had a miscarriage, we were both upset and as well my brother has leukemia and was going through chemo and radiation when this happened and alot of all of that took its toll on our marriage.
Yesterday when he dropped by we ended up having sex and after that experience again I realized that I do still love him, and I want to try to make it work. So today when he came by for more of his stuff I sat him down and told him exactly what I've just told you all, that I want to try to make this work and start over, and the most upsetting part was all that he said was he said he still loves me, but doesnt know if he wants to try it again and that he might be moving back to California (we both live in Chicago now.) I just don't know if it's really is too late to apologize.

2007-11-27 07:21:41 · 12 answers · asked by Lucia F 1

2007-11-27 07:20:22 · 9 answers · asked by Mrs Mole 1

Either referring to a spouse or a boyfriend/girlfriend of a couple months, they always say he/she is my SOULMATE....does anyone KNOW what a true soulmate is?

2007-11-27 07:18:14 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous

My wife, about 3 years ago, met another guy online and (she says) started innocently talking with him saying that they only talked about things like antiques, art, house decorating, etc... But she never told me about this guy until I found out a little over 2 years ago. She said she wouldn't contact him any more.

Ok, so now about 6 months ago I jumped on our computer and she had forgotten to log out of her email... I know I shouldn't have looked, but I did anyway. She was still emailing him and worse yet, had even secretly met him in person several times.

I confronted her with this and she was ADAMANT that nothing physical happened between them and that she hadn't cheated. The problem is that in an email this guy sent to her after one of their meetings, he said that he wishes that he could wrap his arms around her and wake up to her lying next to him. There was more of that kind of intimate talk in other emails too.

I can't seem to let this go. Any advice?

2007-11-27 07:09:40 · 51 answers · asked by Anonymous

Husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up.

But then the wife stops and says, "I don' t feel like it. I just want you to hold me."

The husband says " WHAT???" The wife explains that he must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a woman.

The husband realizes that nothing is going to happen tonight and he might as well deal with it.

So the next day the husband takes her shopping at a big dept. store. He walks around and had her try on three very expensive outfits. And then tells his wife, We 'll take all three of them. Then goes over and gets matching shoes worth $200 each.

And then goes to the jewelry Dept. and gets a set of diamond earrings. The wife is so excited (she thinks her husband has flipped out, but she does not care). She goes for the tennis bracelet.

The husband says "but you don 't even play tennis, but OK if you like it then lets get it.'

The wife is jumping up and down. So excited she cannot even believe what is going on. She says " I am ready to go, lets go to the cash register. "

The husband says, " no no no, honey we're not going to buy all this stuff." The wife face goes blank.

" No honey - I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while."

Her face gets really red she is about to explode and then the husband says " You must not be in tune with my financial needs as a MAN!"

2007-11-27 07:07:04 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous

Would the satisfaction of knowing your were true to your marriage vows and remained faithful (even through rough periods in the marriage) be more important than the regret of missing an opportunity to experience the pleasure of making love with a person other than your spouse?

In other words, would the regret of being unfaithful be worse than the regret of refusing yourself the possible connection with someone else?

2007-11-27 07:05:35 · 49 answers · asked by Salinger 4

I can think of a million things he would like, but they are all pretty expensive.

he is a smart guy who love to read, so I have already got him a book that I know he'll love. We are short on cash this year. What do you recommend? I can do anywhere up to another 40$ probably.

2007-11-27 07:01:29 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

We have a small child who we both adore. We are seeking counseling. Over the past 3 months it has gotten bad. She has been texting a guy she swears is a friend ober 300 times and sees nothing wrong with it. I feel as if she's filling a void emotionally allowing her not to focus on us. She also spends most of her time,emails, and texts talking to 3 of her friends (one who is going through divorce #2, one who is filing #1, and one who just remarried #2) keep in mind we are all only 33 years old. But she says that they have ZERO impact on her decisions. I am no saint, I have never cheated, and I am not accusing her of it, but I want to work things out so badly and she's closing the door. Our duaghter is the most important thing, and my wife tells me it's better to divorce when they are younger (I vehememtly disagree). I am willing to sacrifice some happiness for the sake of my daughter world being rocked. Any help or thoughts please.

2007-11-27 06:58:12 · 29 answers · asked by MG 1

the truth is she was always smarter than me. always stronger, and always more outgoing. she was untouchable. she won a beauty pagent. and she also had a ruthless side. a queen with power that could cut your head off. but for the most part it did not come to that. truth is i probably only had her under the circumstances. i worked so hard for four years and finally i was ready, and i won the girl of my dreams. but then it fell apart as it always does for me. and now here i am. years later. she cut my head off. left me for dead and so here i sit. like a stone. stuck in the mud. for all eternity. peace.

2007-11-27 06:56:56 · 22 answers · asked by steveo 1

I'm a married bisexual and my husband accepts me for who I am. He knew this before we got married. I also have a long term partner (4.5 years) who's recently given me a ring. She said she accepts my circumstance and that I'm the only person she's ever loved this much and wants to stay committed to me. My husband has no problem with it and thinks it's sweet. He wants to throw a party for us. My husband is not involved with her in any way by the way other than through me by the way, just want to make that clear. I love her to death but part me thinks this is not fair to her since I only get to spend so many nights in a week with her. She's a very busy professional woman and right now this works for her, but I don't if this will be ideal in the long term. What should I do?

2007-11-27 06:55:35 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-11-27 06:46:33 · 11 answers · asked by Chris 3

My husband works at night and I really miss him. We have been married for a year and well thats about how long he has been working night shift. I am very proud of him. He has done great he is now a supervisor in hi own department but I really really miss him. I dont see him much, he goes to work at 8 at night and comes home at 8 in the moring. and I work from 9 to 5 and go to college from 6-9 at night so i dont see him until the weekends, But i feel like am being selfish and i think about all those wives whos husbands are serving in the war and those who are truck drivers. I mean how do yall cope with them not being there for you. i really need some advise so that i can cope with him not being there even if it seems that am being a big baby because he is not over sees or in another city or something. Please honest and sencire answeres.

2007-11-27 06:42:44 · 27 answers · asked by chuchitos_mom 1

2007-11-27 06:41:16 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

Is 6yrs too long to be involved with a man that hasn't proposed? Your relationship together is good (for the most), but marriage hasn't been a big topic. Mentioned, but not discussed.
What do you think? I have my own opinion, but what's yours?

2007-11-27 06:30:52 · 21 answers · asked by kskate2jbs 4

i love my perents, but it keeps happenening, my parents love me and i know they mean well, but my wife dosent want people coming in going in our house, she wants them to call, she gave me four options talk to them, change locks or she leaves me or we move, how do i go about this

2007-11-27 06:25:05 · 26 answers · asked by jusmic80 2