how dow i talk to my parents about not just walking in to my wife and mines house and how to be nice about it,

Question

i love my perents, but it keeps happenening, my parents love me and i know they mean well, but my wife dosent want people coming in going in our house, she wants them to call, she gave me four options talk to them, change locks or she leaves me or we move, how do i go about this

Answer 1

our family always had an open door policy, but my son-in-law didn't like it so my daughter just told me and that solved the problem.

Answer 2

Since your parents are the ones doing it, and your wife doesn't like it, then it's time you sat down and politely asked your family to not come over unannounced.

It is really just a matter of setting limits and boundaries.

You are married now, and you and your wife need your privacy. Tell them that you and she would very much appreciate it if they would call first, in case you have plans- or are otherwise engaged...! (After all, we shouldn't do to others what we wouldn't like others to do to us either, no?)

Don't change the locks before talking to them, though. I think that would be very extreme and would make things very tense.

Answer 3

Your wife has the right to ask that. It is her house. My father in law used to do that to me all the time. I asked my husband to talk to him but he still does it. So one time, I went to the door with only my underwear on. He got the message loud and clear. He never did it again. And we have a very good relationship now. Tell your parents "Will you guys please give us a call before you come over? because we might have something else planned". If they ignore your request and still show up unannounced, tell them "I'm sorry but we already planned on going out" Walk out with them and take your wife for a drive. They will get the hint. Don't worry, your parents will not hate you. They love you. They just need to be reminded you have a family now. And your house is yours, not an extension of their house.

Answer 4

Change the locks, explain to your parents that you love them and want to see them just as often as ever but don't want to have to worry about them walking in at an inoppotune moment! That should suffice as to why you prefer a bit more privacy without hurting feelings.

Answer 5

I think you need to look at both sitatuations.

Your parents want to help, but coming around and "just dropping by" isn't always good either.

I think you need to sit down with your wife and explain to her they are just trying to help, but you respect her enough to ask your parents to please call before stopping by.

Change your locks, and that way they won't be tempted to come around and "walk in" uninvited.

And lastly have a sit down with your wife and parents and find a common middle compromise to have both of them understand.

Not only will your wife back off, your parents will appriciate you telling them it has been an issue and respect that.

You can't be afraid to talk to your parents. Just be straight forward with them.

Answer 6

There are a lot of wonderful answers here, and I agree with them, you have been given several ways to tell your parents that. Your wife has every right to not want them walking in on her, even if you are at work, it doesn't mean she's doing something that she shouldn't, but okay, as an example, when its hot in the summer, and i'm home alone, i will clean up the house or relax on the couch in old track shorts and a sports bra. NOT something i want his parents (or mine) to see!!! lol. They don't know what is going on in your house, and they could walk in on you two doing any number of things. After we left the army, and lived with my in laws before we found our own place, my MIL walked in on me giving my hubby oral. without knocking. please talk to your parents. they will understand

Answer 7

Okay...this is a common problem.

I would just level with your folks. I bet they'll understand, and how would they feel if they just walked in one day and found you two in a, well, "compromising position?" How do they know what you might be doing, say, on the living room floor or kitchen table?

I'd just tell them you are BOTH uncomfortable about it, and you don't want to hurt their feelings, but you do enjoy your privacy. Suggest they give you some warning before they literally "drop in" on you!

Good luck!

Answer 8

I gonna have to side with the wife on this one....

They are your parents, therefore you are the one who should be speaking with them...& do not blame your wife when you explain why it isn't a good ideal to drop in on NewlyWeds!!

Don't change the locks. Shouldn't be necessary. Explain to your parents that you are somewhat of a Sexual Deviant!! and that you have a serious Whip Cream Fetish! Give them a can show them how to shake it up and squirt alittle on the back of your hand. Lick it off and say....Seee, I chase my wife around the house with this can and sometimes a spray her and sometimes she sprays me and then we lick it off and we would be sooo embarrassed if you caught us breathless and sticky.

Good Luck,

& you should really try this. (chasing with whip cream- oh and I've heard it's great without cloths) Great for setting off a great week-end with your wife

Answer 9

Be a man, change the locks today. Yes you love your parents, but you live with your wife.

Answer 10

change the locks and when they come over without calling don't answer the door after a few times of this happen they will start to call to see if your home. but tell them they need to call you before they come over.

Answer 11

Just say that you don't intend this to come off in a mean way, but a heads up before they just pop in would be nice and respectful. I know what its like to have inlaws to pop in unanounced. Its frustrating. So just I can see where your wife is coming from. I think you need to tell your parents that it makes your wife uneasy about how they just come over without checking to see if its a good time.