Marriage & Divorce - 19 November 2007

I hate this..

I started this job in May and in July my husband (of 4 years) and I separated. He is in rehab at the moment and I am too emabarrassed to tell my four co-workers. They are all women, two of which are married. I have been doing a little lying, like the other week it was my bday and I said he bought me perfume. Now, they want to know if he is going to our christmas party.

How do I do this?

2007-11-19 09:10:32 · 19 answers · asked by None 1

Before I got married to my husband, we been togeter for 5 years. can this cause to have a long term marriage? How long?

2007-11-19 09:10:11 · 19 answers · asked by lil_shanshan113084 2

I took some dinner over to my friends mother-in-law as she was not feeling well and was not able to attend church. When I got there the pastor's car was in the backyard so I went in the back door as it was opened and I assumed they would be in the living room. Imagine my surprise when I heard muffled sound coming from the bedroom. And before someone asked there was no mistaking what they were doing. I was so shocked I quietly tiptoed out and left without them hearing me. I am so disappointed at them both. He has seven children and a wife and he is always preaching family loyalty and respect. Miss 'D' is a widow and a volunteer at the church. I always respected her work ethic but now I wonder if she did that just to get to the pastor. My faith has just taken a beating and yes I know he is mortal and tempted like the rest of us but still I am so confused. Is changing churches the answer and should I say something to her? Please don't give me any flip or cute answers.

2007-11-19 09:08:01 · 26 answers · asked by phillygirlz 3

we have been married for almost 5 years and my husband and i want to renew our vows, is this crazy, and is there a certain time for this or is it up to each individual couple?

2007-11-19 09:07:53 · 8 answers · asked by reneck girl 2

We've been dating for shortly over a month and spend almost every day together and have the deepest talks and so much fun. This weekend we told each other we loved each other. I feel like i love him a lot and he is the man of my dreams in so many ways but i still have so many questions of whether am really sure.....

2007-11-19 09:06:39 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

I was stressed out on Friday because he talked about his Ex. Then I started asking questions about sexual things. He answered then he said that he is stupid and he shouldn't said anything about his ex. then he went to bed at 9. I was on the computer listening to songs and drinking wine. I came to him and said I am sorry for asking. then I started crying because I was missing my family( I left my family for him) I asked him for tissue he said why don't you go get it. I got the tissue and went to living room instead of bedroom. Saying that all I was asking for tissue. He came over and slapped me hard on the head saying 'Are you crazy?' I said Why you hit me? Then he grabbed my hand and pulled me on the ground. I asked to leave me or I will call 911. He hugged me saying he loves me so much. He don't wanna loose me? i said You hit me I am not going to stay in this house.He said that's fine I will file the papers.

2007-11-19 08:58:18 · 53 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband and I have recently gotten married we've been together for 2years plus and we've known each other alot longer.
In the begininng of our relationship within time i noticed an issue with him drinking. I spoke how i felt about this. Then knows it's a problem but doesnt kno how to fix it, within time came denial, but looked at it like I just didnt want him to drink. "me being in control so bad things wont happen" Not giving him the chance to prove it to me on his own.
We moved to a new location, old friends just werent there. Drinking stoped for over 6months now I dropped the issue just this past weekend I put away my own issues with this topic. Since we had a lil vacation..
We both drank, however I know how to control myself and no when to stop. He doesnt. I had one drink friday, he had 2..
Saturday, we drank got buzzed, he continued when I soo stoped. Sunday we went out to dinner I ordered a drink plus i had 1shot. He had 6 beers, plus

2007-11-19 08:43:53 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

....the best sex in the world with a man you dont love or being totally in love with a man that you are unable to have sex with but who is also totally in love with you?

2007-11-19 08:37:50 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous

What would you do if you had the email address of your husband's mistress? Would you write to her and tell her that you know all about the affair? Or would you tell HER husband instead?

2007-11-19 08:37:35 · 49 answers · asked by Anonymous

I was with my ex for 14 months. We broke up almost a year ago and I've been with m current bf for 6 months. I have not seen or talked to my ex since las December. It wasn't a particularly bad break-up...he has texted me a couple of times over the past year and I ignore them because I have no desire to communicate with him at all.

Just today, his brother in law contacted me on myspace. He said he ran across my profile and wanted to say hello. He and my ex's sister are now going through a divorce and I think he just wanted to talk to someone that understands how screwy the family is. I always got along very well with my ex's brother in law, at family functions, funerals, and we did hang out a couple times as couples. We seemed to have alot of the same morals and views. However, when my ex and I broke up I understood that I would have to also break up with his friends and family (sucks but it's life).

2007-11-19 08:28:38 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-11-19 08:23:48 · 21 answers · asked by Stacye S 3

It causes arguments. I don't want to control him, but it really makes me mad that he stays out all hours of the night. I really need a guys opinion on this. I don't want to be one of those controlling wives. Am I making to big of a deal out of this?? HELP??

2007-11-19 08:20:32 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

Thanks for all of the answers to my earlier questions. I have started going to counciling and have recently found out that my husband has been keeping tabs on me. He has a calendar and writes down everything that I do or don't do. He has even gone as far as to go through the bathroom trash to see if I'm on my period or not. It's really starting to scare me. He has gotten more controlling and has started cursing at the kids more. He even used the f**k work toward our 4 year old. I really need some good advice how to handle this. PLEASE HELP!!!

2007-11-19 08:10:51 · 32 answers · asked by Very Blessed!!! 1

My divorce has been going on over 4 years. She is just continually stalling. Anyone else take that long?

2007-11-19 08:05:42 · 10 answers · asked by stevel226 3

I have been married for almost a year, and haven't changed my name because I have a somewhat unique situation.
I want to keep my 1. firstname, 2. middlename, and 3. lastname.
Then, I want to simple ADD my husbands name to that list. There is no place on my marriage license to list your "new name" so is the only way to do what I want to file for a "legal" name change with the county clerk and pay upwards of 300 dollars? I find this to be a little patriarchal and arcane, not to mention insane (since, in the end I just want to keep my names and take his too), so I hope someone knows of another option!!

2007-11-19 08:04:51 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband and I have been seperated for 1 month due to him cheating on me with his ex. I made him leave the house and we didnt speak for a couple of days. But he's already talking to other women. We've been together for 4 years(married 2 years) and he acts as if he could care less about the split up. He moved 10 hours away and he doesnt even bother calling me or calling to check up in our son. I want to talk to him but I dont want to call him to see what made him do what he did but I know I shouldnt when he's the one that cheated and should be calling me.

2007-11-19 08:03:38 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

First off I am not an abusive husband. I love my family and I am usually a mild mannered person. I have been married for 20 years. and I have 4 children, one who is at home. My wife drinks a lot and has gone through counseling. She was sober for about a year but started back drinking. She has a very domineering and aggressive personality. I have been embarassed at her at parties and other events while she is drunk she yells at me as if I'm a kid for no real reason. I work hard and have given her and our children a good life. She has this dillusion that I am cheating on her which I have never done and don't plan on doing. She got all upset the other night by a something harmelss I did and cussed me loudly. I don't know what came over me but I slapped her in the face. I got mad and didn't mean to do it but it happened and I feel terrible about it. As I look back I think I should leave her from all the stress. I tried to walk away but she followed me everywhere I went. Any advice? Thanks

2007-11-19 08:01:43 · 16 answers · asked by Nash M 1

Two other women were after my husband but he picked me to marry. One of the women even managed to break us up for a short period. When I emailed him and made up a story on how I slept with another guy my now husband threw a fit. He called this particular woman all kinds of names and the next day she stole his car. The other woman tempted him thruout our relationship by flashing and trying to turn us off from each other. In the end he picked me even tho it wasn't much of a contest ! I like Angelina Jolie but I don't like what she did to Jennifer Anniston, it wasn't right.

2007-11-19 07:44:33 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

Long story short, I took the kids and moved to my mom's house this past weekend. I'm tired of my hubby's crap and told him that he has until the end of the year to get it together or I'm filing for divorce. I'm developing this list of things that I would like to see from him in order to stay with him. Is this the right thing to do? One part of me thinks that there is no way that he could know the things on my list because he's not a mind reader, but on the other hand, these are common things that everyone wants in their relationship so it's not a huge secret. All I want from him is:
1. To wear his wedding ring without my having to ask. I took mine off because he doesn't want to act like a husband so I figured why should I wear it. He saw that I took mine off and took his off. I'm thinking that if he really wanted to prove to me that he still wanted to be married that he would wear it, regardless if I did or not.
2. Make an effort to spend time with me. I sent him a message today and

2007-11-19 07:38:14 · 22 answers · asked by redpeach_mi 7

The problem is my mother in law. She was so nice to me before but ever since we told her that I am pregnant, she has completly changed. She always tells me how I need to get to know him better. We went to her house for Halloween, I walked up to the counter where she was standing, she just said "I know you are there, I heard the dogs when you came in." Not hi or how are you or anything. I am 20 weeks pregnant and she told me it is too early to start thinking of names. My family is so excited, they tell everyony about the baby but she doesn't say anything to anyone about it. She never asks how the baby or I'm doing. My husband is trying to be a football coach and she tells him how he cant let me get in the way of doing what he wants. He just tries to stay out of it but the little comments she makes are rude. She wont care if she is hurting my fellings so I don't want to talk to her about it and I don't know what else to do. Please help

2007-11-19 07:33:05 · 22 answers · asked by Baby Girl Rylin 5/3/08 4

and has actually loaded a gun and put it in their mouth begging you to stay yet has affairs and does anything he wants until he get caught.

2007-11-19 07:31:36 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous

I really enjoy going down on my husband!

He says I am great at it .... BUT there is always room for improvement so....

1. What are some tricks that you like to use OR What are some tricks guys like to get

2. How can I get my husband to direct me to what he likes or what he wants more of .....

Again not a perverted question .... just asking for advice

2007-11-19 07:27:49 · 27 answers · asked by Michelle 1

a good time to have an affair or second..........? if you know other person is having affairs too?

2007-11-19 07:26:36 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

My best friend just had a baby and her husband is not helping her out at all. He hasn;t changed one diaper, fed the baby or even held him for more than 5 minutes. If the baby cried he actually yells at the baby to stop--and the baby is just a newborn. Now that she isn't working he actually throws that he makes the money in her face. He says that since he works 15 hours a day that its his money and she should appreciate that she has a roof over her head...but she never said she wasn't happy or appreciated it. She askes him if he wanted to be with he anymore and he said if I didn't want to be with you anymore You wouldn't be here...so my question is...if he says he wants to be with her...then why does he act this way and not help her at all and scream and yell at her constantly? He says he wants to be with her, but doesn't act like it...Do Actions speak lounder than words?

2007-11-19 07:17:17 · 25 answers · asked by lesliebedford623 1

His friend is single and no girlfriend. He's over 40 years old but still hang out in go-go bar. He has a lot of friends he met in go-go bar, both male and female. He's been friend with all exotic dancer. I never liked when my husband go and hang out with him. I feel threaten and now he's married he shouldn't act like he's still single and go hanging out in those bars. Most of the time, his friend will call or send him messages to go out. If not, he rarely goes by himself. I feel like it gonna ruin our marriage life one day if he doesn't stop. How do I cope with this?

2007-11-19 07:14:36 · 25 answers · asked by Penny 2

married for 3yrs but together for a total of 6yrs.

How would an open relationship work?
My husband and I have been talking about it for a while now and thinking about actually making it work... The thing is how do we make it work without causing any problems?

He's not jealous and i'm alright with it... I dont mind him being with someone else as long as they know its not serious.

We both love each other very much and just want to spice some things up a bit.

Prefer Comments from people in an open relationship...

2007-11-19 07:12:17 · 22 answers · asked by ladyeve983 2

I am moving from Louisiana to Texas. I have purchased a home and the closing date is December 10th.

The problem is, I have an 8 yr old daughter that (my court papers say) I share joint custody .....but, we have not heard from her father in over a year. He has not had any visitation nor has he tried to contact her since christmas last year. He has made 3 child support payments in 3 years with the last being Oct of 2006. He does not have a job nor a house. The last place I knew of him living was with his fathers girlfriend.

I looked up online (and called an attorney to make sure that I have to do this just to cover my butt) and found out that my responsibility is that I must notify the father by sending him a" notice to relocate letter" to his last known address by certified mail. I sent the letter to the girlfriends house this morning but I still am unsure of his whereabouts. Soooooooooo what if we hear nothing back - does that free me to move?????

2007-11-19 07:11:56 · 6 answers · asked by spoildrotn 2

My husband installs carpets. His work is very scattered. He might work from 8a-2p one day then 6a-9p the next. I have been cheated on many times before so when he doesnt answer his phone or tell me exactly where he is working that day i get suspicious. it def. affects our relationship but i dont want to get hurt what should i look out for. Oh also his text msgs get deleted alot because his phone (my old phone) can only hold so many and he uses that alot for work so i cant really check that... Anyways what should i look out for.

2007-11-19 07:11:16 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

Husband in 40's, good job, kids, wife that adores him, wedding day promised to never join the army again, behind him, 15 years later he started to think, sleep, talk, the service. His entire family has begged him not to join. His promise to his wife means nothing. Stands to lose $$ if deployed. Wife full time home maker, good wife, he is going against all. Joined for 2 months (part time) before he told wife. Now he has turned cold, obsessed with his 'new' life. Wife fears mid-life crisis. He always was very moody before now displays further behaviour diffierences. Yet thinks the wife should continue with him as if he did not change their whole lives. Should the wife confront him and tell him to move out? Should she leave with the kids? Or is there hope for this marriage? The wife was honest up front that she did not want him to join when they married, could not be a military wife, she remembers how depressed, angry, drinker/ he use to be when he got out before.

2007-11-19 07:10:05 · 5 answers · asked by wife 2

My husband and I got married three years ago and things are normal. But last week we argued over some silly stuff as all couples do, and i said some hurtful things about his family and that upset him and we got into it real bad you know. He packed his things and left. I tried telling myself its okay but im now hurting. I love him and although we had this bad argument that got nasty, and i was mad for a day or two, now i miss him.
Have i chased him away for good? What makes a man leave his marriage? Its the first time he has ever walked out? What can i do?

2007-11-19 07:08:08 · 28 answers · asked by AALYAH R 1