Marriage & Divorce - 24 October 2007

I just got married and my husband knows that i dont want him to look at porn but when i brought it up he said he wasent allowed and i asked did he want to and he gave me that ya i do look. It's hard for me to take in and makes me feel un attractive and not good enough.it makes me not want to have sex with him. He gets mad when i say it hurts me and i dont agree. is this all ok and normal?what should i do?

2007-10-24 15:11:20 · 14 answers · asked by Mashley 2

I have been dating my Special Forces Marine for about a year now and I love him deeply, as of late he has talked about wanting me to be the mother of his children and the only woman in his life ans asked me to move in with him. He has hinted to me that he feels to be to the point of giving me a ring. Here is the thing, I love him very very much and want to be with him with every fiber of my beeing but I am not sure that I am on the same page when it comes to getting engaged (YET) yes I want to in the future marry this man, but I want us to really know one another better before I say yes to spending the rest of my life with him. Again it is not in any way that I do not love him or have secids thoughts, but I am just net ready for this major step YET, how do I tell him YES i want to marry you but I am not ready yet?????

2007-10-24 15:02:25 · 18 answers · asked by one Life to live 3

I filed for a divorce over 1 year ago after finding out my wife was seeing another guy. I paid my lawyer $4,000, for the divorce and custody of my 2 sons, whom I've been raising with no help from my wife. To date, I am no closer to getting my divorce or custody of my sons. After keeping our 3 year old son overnite, my wife returned him to me with a blackeye and covered in welts and bruises. I took him to the hospital who called the police & social services. Eventually my wifes boyfriend confessed to beating my son. My wife says everyone is making a big deal over this. I asked my lawyer to get a custody trial for me, and now he says he needs another $1,000 to go to trial. Is there an organization I can contact that will help me ? I am just barely keeping my bills paid. I can't continue feeding my lawyer money, especially when he isn't helping me. He doesn't even return my phone calls. I live in the Pocono, Pa. area, and I would greatly appreciate any suggestions. Thank you

2007-10-24 15:00:17 · 5 answers · asked by alpacamms 2

My husband has gone away to think about the issues he has with our marriage. My insecurities with myself and my control on him.
How do i love myself again and trust in my husband.

2007-10-24 15:00:13 · 12 answers · asked by girly girl 2

There are positives to him but it seems like when it is good it is great but when it is bad it is horrible. I guess it has been so long since he has said very much positive about me or us I am falling into some kind of hole. I run a 3mil dollar business (not mine) own my own home and live comfortable. When we first met I thought we had the similiar backgrounds. His parents are divorced but I get along with his mom very well. He of course does not for various reasons. I have a high self esteem at my job but can not seem to find the courage or what ever to "kick him to the curb" I am not a model but I do take care of myself. He is several yrs younger but that never seemed to be a big deal. I know I am too nice for the way I am treated. And sometimes wonder if I have to much self confidence because I find myself laughing at the stupidity of some of the things he says and does. I guess I have this romantic notion that the "great" will come to the service. Tnx for advice and leting me vent

2007-10-24 14:59:36 · 3 answers · asked by Patty 2

We've been together for almost 7 years (under the same roof) I have three teens from my first marriage. Tom and I have yet to be succesful at conceiving. I am so afraid of getting married again. ( By the way my EX and are are really really good friends. Not "really" in a bad way!!! But also losing my last name kinda freaks me out. I am 36, Married and divorced only 1 time kids all have same dad. Tom is my second very serious relationship. I love him ...

2007-10-24 14:43:11 · 13 answers · asked by Sabrina D 1

I have posted some questions regarding my bf would go back to his ex wife with open arms whenever we had an arrgument. Some answers said that they should work thing out since they had a commitment in their marriage before. And, he may find the new relationship is not as comfortable as the old one. It seemed for me that the new partner is less value than an ex. Will it be better to work things out with his ex wife/husband than with his new partner? Can anyone share your experiences as a new partner. What do you feel and how do you handle it?

2007-10-24 14:41:26 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-10-24 14:39:44 · 11 answers · asked by mw 7

has 2 weeks coming up. He asked that as a coming home gift that I should invite another woman over to let him watch us have sex. We have been together 3 years.
I guess it really bothered me that he asked, ESPECIALLY since given our circumstances. On your two week break you want a 3some? Couldn't it have been after he is home from being deployed? Or even a few months after he is home.
I'm deeply insulted, very disappointed, and I think I feel different today about him.
What do I say or do? Now, I don't even want to see him when he is back on break. I just think it was unacceptable for him to ask I share this brief time with him with anyone else.
Or am I over reacting, and should I just indulge his fantasy? But I think I'm pretty sure I've been insulted. I need advice before he notices Im not answering his emails. I just want to send a photo of my middle finger, but I must be good during deployment.
Advice Please????

2007-10-24 14:36:45 · 12 answers · asked by bosom2bosom 2

I would think that a mature woman, or one who is ready for a serious relationship with a man who is also serious ab. her, would be happy to learn to balance her career life with her home life. Are high-powered career women really such a risk? I would think such a woman would be an asset. She would be able to pull her weight and be a true partner to a true partner.

2007-10-24 14:36:41 · 13 answers · asked by Indi 4

2007-10-24 14:29:45 · 4 answers · asked by LEE G 1

I probably would have gotten over him by now but he rubs in how unhappy I look and how his new fiance has just lost a bunch of weight. I am usually one to let things go and have tried to let this go but everytime I start feeling better, he says the meanest things you can imagine to bring me back down again. How can I end this once and for all so he'll leave me alone and let me get on with my life?

2007-10-24 14:28:20 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous

we got a divorce. He moved in with her 6 months after we separated. She should feel secure and confident in her relationship with him - right? Instead she competes with me. My son and I get a dog - they get a dog. I buy the car I have dreamed about and my son and I are very excited. We love that car! Then...they buy the same car! Of course theirs is a more expensive version. Why do they have to do this? I barely speak to my ex - only when it is about our son. I do not bad mouth him or the girlfriend. I have done my best to support my son's relationship with his dad. Why do these women feel they have to compete with the ex wife when the ex wife is not even in the picture?

2007-10-24 14:25:05 · 63 answers · asked by Anonymous

This is a very sensitive issue and I will give details that is important. I recently had a baby. She is wonderful, but there is definately distance now between me and my husband. We have always been best friends and now we are arguing a lot. We never went to bed angry, now we are going to bed angry, waking up angry. As a wife and a woman, I feel very insecure. I have lost alot of my baby weight, but my figure is not the same. I use to have a rock hard belly now it feels like a sponge, although flat. There is some other things that I really cannot get into, but for the first time in the nearly 17 years we have been together, I do not feel really confident about us.

This is a very tough and painful issue. I know that I might get some immature answers, but I ask someone that is married to please help me with this. I usually do not ask these types of questions, but I am desperate.

2007-10-24 14:18:28 · 33 answers · asked by 2fine4u 6

Please refer to my previous (and relevant) post regarding my husband. We have since discussed his crush and are seeing a marriage counselor. Meanwhile, he has been trying to keep his distance from this girl although they are often paired up for work (at least two days this week.)

My problem at the moment is he has told me he had lunch at co-workers' houses this week (3 times at least). All his co-workers are women and these two women are apparently not at all attractive (his words). They basically fixed him lunch and talked about work. My question is, am I being too controlling? Not trustng enough? I just feel I have been too trusting in the past and now look where it has gotten me. What should I do? Do you think he is trying to avoid his crush even more by doing this? I have already told him it makes me feel uncomfortable because he has never done this in the past at other jobs. I told him I would make him lunch instead if he wanted.

2007-10-24 14:16:34 · 8 answers · asked by em 2

2007-10-24 14:10:09 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

Sometimes i feel as if my husband is flirting right in front of me. We have only been married 6 months and we are both in our early 20’s. I have a 15 year old sister that is very pretty. She comes over and stays with us on the weekends some. It literally makes me sick to my stomach when she is here, because they are constantly flirting. They pretend to be fighting smacking each other around and he even smacked her butt once. Then when we go out with my girl friends, he talks to them and ignores me. I don’t know if maybe I am making a mountain out of a molehill or if I should really be worried? I just want to know why he would do this?

2007-10-24 14:09:47 · 18 answers · asked by K-La 1

i checked our internet history which he hid..which showed he has looked at porn every day for the past 3 weeks. god knows how long before that. i confronted him with this issue a long time ago before we were married (we've only been married 2 months). he promised to cut down since we were gonna get married and i told him how i felt. lately, i feel he hasnt been that interested in me. we only have sex 1-2 times a week even though im always more than willing..heck i want it!! the only reasom i checked our internet history was because i was suspicios..what newlywed husband who claims his wife is out of his league doesnt want to have sex with her when she is sooo willing and wanting it. well now i have my answer. he looks at porn every single day when i am not home. i confronted him and he said he would stop..but i have heard that one before. i told him i didnt believe he would stop and he said "f-you" and then stormed out of the house. what should i do? i am so lost and heartbroken.

2007-10-24 14:08:21 · 12 answers · asked by Heather 3

2007-10-24 14:02:42 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

My sister's friend recently got married and decided that her ring was not good enough soooo...she exchanged it for a diamond that she already had from a previous engagement (don't ask why she did not return it, she didn't) anyway her husband asked her why she changed it and she said that her friend (a jeweler) got a good price on the "new" one. Her husband seemed satisfied with that answer. So now she wears a $20,000 5 Karat ring from her ex fiancee as if her husband gave it to her. Isn't that a lie???

2007-10-24 13:53:52 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband had given up on our marriage a while back and I was still fighting for it. I tried everything I could think of to make things better, marriage therapy, reading millions of books, spending hours researching. I just wanted him to see that there was happiness and could be more happiness if we both just tried. He refused to try and didnt care too. Our marriage has consisted of a lot of things. Immigration issues, how to raise children, online pornography, talking to girls online and making arrangements to meet, etc... Those are bad things but there have been good. So anyway he wanted to seperate, live seperately, so he could have his freedom but not lose the family. I couldnt agree it broke my heart that we were good enough on the side but not all together. We have 2 kids that adore him. The other night after a fight I needed to leave and asked for the keys. He refused. So I took the work keys and called my sister. He called the cops on me for stealing his work keys when...

2007-10-24 13:23:50 · 13 answers · asked by aalshafi 1

Which have whittled you down from the trusting or loving person you had thought to be and remain . . how stony has your heart become toward appraising anything new, which you may have thought at moments of genuine enthusiasm - refreshed from embittered ghosts of the past, has your Heart become?
What would grant you the energy or faith to believe in love again?
What would hold you back, warning you, perhaps, aligning with the caution of your imagination, of Present, from offering yourself again with virginal of heart and mind to a possible, new beloved?
Or, has it taken to much out of you, the games and betrayals, the glib exclamations and lacking of substance words, which are offered in a seemingly amoral way to seduce you, into engaging yourself into another mind game, which will show no result, except another disappoinment?
As of NOW, where does your Heart stand, as far, and considering the confusion which unfairly has made it, No longer want to respond with fresh faith and intent?

2007-10-24 13:15:57 · 5 answers · asked by skydancerwi 6

2007-10-24 13:12:23 · 21 answers · asked by cwxmas 3

I have been involved with a man for over 6 years, and I am tired of hearing its all me. You tell me. His house is a total mess. Dogs sleep with him, sheets, blankets only get washed if I do it. Large house but socks, towels (which the cat pees on) things people have given him are everywhere. No pride in home at all. Swears way too much and is like a jekl and hyde personality. I buy groceries, clean up, do his phone calls if problems with bills, etc. He doesnt understand why I wont move in, and blames our problems because I do not live there. Always has time for friends. Calls me just to tell me he needs this that or the other. Very rarely asks how my day went but goes on about his. Doesnt understand why me and his teenage son give him turmoil.The list could go on about him. I work everyday (he works for himself) put in 40+ hours a week and just want some kindness. I try to be paient and bite my tongue . I certainly have my faults but damn I have no problem getting along with others????

2007-10-24 13:09:55 · 51 answers · asked by Patty 2

2007-10-24 13:05:31 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-10-24 12:51:21 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous

me this year.

2007-10-24 12:39:59 · 18 answers · asked by ent001952 1

Or do you know other people who are nicer.
In defining nice for this survey use your willingness to forgive and forget (yes, I mean be used as a doormat) as your guide.

Also, on a scale of 1-10, how nice are you?

2007-10-24 12:37:41 · 48 answers · asked by Anonymous

What do you do when your husband's best friend is always at our house? I work during the day and he works at night, so we hardly see each other during the week. The only time we have for each other is the weekends, and he's always here. I guess he thinks of our house as his second home. To make matters worse we are newly weds and we fight over him all the time. I really don't want this to ruin our marriage, but it's seriously stressing me out. I am so sick of fighting bout it. What should I do?

2007-10-24 12:34:40 · 20 answers · asked by K-La 1

she is in collage,very adventourous,artsy,she travels alot and loves it.I cant think of anything,she does not want jewelry,thats what i get her mostly.Help

2007-10-24 12:34:14 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous