I just got married and my husband knows that i dont want him to look at porn but when i brought it up he said he wasent allowed and i asked did he want to and he gave me that ya i do look. It's hard for me to take in and makes me feel un attractive and not good enough.it makes me not want to have sex with him. He gets mad when i say it hurts me and i dont agree. is this all ok and normal?what should i do?
2007-10-24 15:11:20 · 14 answers · asked by Mashley 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I never said not to I just told him I did not agree and dident want him to. FYI to thoes men who call me a prudish wife!
2007-10-24 15:31:45 · update #1
i got called a prude tons of times here, the funny thing is any man i have ever been with would say i am not at all. porn was never a subject in my marriages or relationships, there are actually guys who dont need that cheap stimulation and are satisfied with what they have. porn, or the guys that watch it creates a disturbing image of what women "like" to do. i for my part can understand if a curious BOY looks at nude pics, but a mature MAN doesnt watch porn. i suggest you tell your partner you like looking at successful guys, when you two are going places, in big cars with lots of money, thats a turn on and sexy to you (men tend to be insecure when it comes to success) and see how good that makes him feel.
2007-10-24 16:24:10 · answer #1 · answered by not this way 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
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2016-07-20 09:07:10 · answer #2 · answered by Geraldine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, it's not being prudish to not want him to look at porn. Some people really think its degrading. But he's prolly been looking at it for years. That's not going to change.
Take it from a guy who loves to look at porn, though. There was a period in my marriage when I actually threw away the mags and videos I had around because my wife wanted me. We had a lot of good sex, with no inhibitions and lots of asking for what was desired.
Now I can't get anough of the porn. I'm downloading some vids right now, in fact. See, the well has kinda dried up, and likes to sleep alot when she has the chance.
So what I would suggest is to offer to watch some videos with him, then climb on top of him after twenty minutes of it. He'll eventually forget about the porn. Love him like a new wife. Guys watch porn and look at mags because we flat-out like sex. Keep him busy and he won't have time to go in search of porn.
Good Luck. Remember he committed to a monogamous lifelong relationship with you, tell that nasty whore of his left hand to stay the hell out of it.
2007-10-24 16:29:16 · answer #3 · answered by lovinglifeina69 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Marriage is about sharing, not control. You are not his mother, you are his wife!! If he were to say that he did not want you watching Oprah (just an example) would you think that he was well within his rights and stop? I doubt it!
Men are visual creatures. We like to look at women! This does not mean that we want to sleep with them, we are just enjoying the view. It has nothing to do with you, or the way he views you.
It sounds like you are insecure. He is not comparing you to the porn star, it is not a competition. He loves you. He married you, not a porn star. He is looking at pixels on the screen. He is not cheating!
When you try to control him, and if he does not agree, withhold physical contact as a punishment, all you do is build resentment in the marriage!
If you do not like what he is looking at, do not look at it! Ignore it, just as he ignores things that you like and he doesn't. If you nag or otherwise keep him from looking at pictures, he will either sneak looking at then, or start to feel like the marriage was a mistake. He is an adult who should be free to choose what to watch and read, just as you are.
2007-10-24 15:51:19 · answer #4 · answered by fire4511 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
My wife asked me why I was looking at porn. I told her "I like to look at naked women and I haven't seen much of you lately." (Not arguing, just stating a fact.) She immediately stripped off all her clothes and jumped in my lap. She started wearing less around the house at times, sometimes nothing at all. Porn problem was solved and we both enjoy the increased action between us. Maybe your husband feels the same and you could stop his porn the way my wife stopped mine.
2007-10-24 15:38:01 · answer #5 · answered by old beatnik 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with fire4511 . Maybe you sould try watching it with him , you may find that you like it also. Watching porn together can actully help in a marriage . What I mean by this is you may see new thing that the two of you could try out and spice things up some.
2007-10-24 16:08:20 · answer #6 · answered by bonnie_clyde_4u 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is only okay for a husband to look at porn if the wife is accommodating to that request. Some wives really don't care.
But if you don't like it and he still does it then there is a problem with respect in the marriage.
2007-10-24 15:41:27 · answer #7 · answered by Jessica 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My wife looks at PORN!! Whats your problem, you don't have the rite to tell him not to look at westerns, war, or porn!! Quit being his prudish mother!!
2007-10-24 15:28:57 · answer #8 · answered by happywjc 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's a form of disrespect. It like saying you are not enough. It's also one more invitation to temptation that married men don't need. If he wants to see pictures of naked women, would he take the opportunity to look at on in person. You have a reason to be concerned.
2007-10-24 15:25:44 · answer #9 · answered by GoodGuy53 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Try watching it with him. You never know, it might make you just as hot. I know that if I was into porn, I would absolutely enjoy my wife taking part as we watched some young, tight, big fake breasted women, scream her head off as she GETS IT ON!!!
2007-10-24 15:51:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋