Marriage & Divorce - 19 October 2007

I have always had strong views toward marriage, and I have recently decided that I don't ever want to get married. I have seen how it ruins relationships. I honestly can not name a single married couple I know who is not miserable! I think there is some psychological trigger when two people sign those papers. I know this may sound wrong, but I have seen that is usually the womens fault. In many of the cases I have seen, the woman has changed drastically after marriage. Women are very controlling, especially with money. I am in college and I will be going to law school. I love living life to the fullest and I love expensive toys. I know that when I am able to afford it, I will have lots of nice cars, houses, boats, etc. I feel like if I ever get married I will never be able to have these things. I have seen a few cases where two people are not married and are very happy. I'm not saying that I don't want a lifelong companion/girlfriend, but I just don't want to say "I do".

2007-10-19 23:30:01 · 17 answers · asked by mike 2

explain possible reasons in your own words.thanks.

2007-10-19 23:01:42 · 29 answers · asked by polly-pocket 5

my wifes leaving me and filing for divorce over a.5. year mistake. over this woman.5. years ago ,she was married and now i think she was divorced over what that trailer park trash caused . by letting everything be known .about us after all it was her who came on to me while i was there and she was in her. 40.s and baiting be to have sex with her now my wife.s leaving me over it that just isnt right my wife.s going to see. this trash.s now.ex. husband in that state it isnt no good it was her idea. to do what happened not mine .i was only.17. at that time she thought i was in love with her no way shes older than my mom. and had strech mark.s on her like a pig i never ever liked this woman much less her now .ex. it was more pity why i had sex with her not nothing more but my wife.s leaving me over her. that isnt right.i live.5. states from her and some how my wife found out about what happened isnt she lible over breaking up my marrage at her age now as well her action.s

2007-10-19 22:39:48 · 6 answers · asked by matthew v 3

This person can provide all the material things you desire, but your heart is with someone else. Your family really likes this person and wants nothing to do with the one you really love. Could you learn to love this person and leave your true love? Would you feel comfortable consummating the marriage? Having kids with this person? Divorce is NOT possible in this country.

2007-10-19 20:44:18 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

It took a couseler to convince me we should be married after 3 years of dating. I said you know what, you right I should be more comited. We did it, and being married is what i have always wanted. But shes not right for me. Controlling, almost feminist. And just when Ive had enough, very nice and giving. And I forgive, Probably because its the easy way. But we have been fighting sibce our wedding night. Her whole family knows, and I hardly like to visit them because every one know everything. But my family doesnt know a thing and would be a shocker if we were to split up. My family thinks im happy. We have been doing good for a week now, and tonight we had an arguement. In bed she said she cant sleep with me because she might hurt me... whats up with that. We pretty much have role reversale where she makes all the money but I have been on my own and self suficient since 18. I could do it again, but Im worried my family would think im a loser. what should i do?

2007-10-19 20:43:44 · 11 answers · asked by joe C 2

is he less interested than he should be? am i more interested than i should be? should i be concerned?

2007-10-19 20:38:40 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

I love my wife. We will be married for 12 years this November. I am trying to find ways to make her feel special and show that I love her. Most of the advice that I have read say do little things like help out around the house by cooking dinner, doing laundry every once in a while and pick up (In our house I am the one who normaly does all of this). Give her flowers every now and again. Tell her you love her everyday. Give her a small special gift. Take her out for a long romantic weekend without the kids. I do all of this and more. I bring her coffee to her when she is in bed every morning. I make sure that I give her a big hug and kiss and tell her that I love her every morning, when we get home from work and before we go to bed. I tell her she is beutiful. I need help finding other ways. Do any of you have any ideas?

2007-10-19 20:30:58 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

Well guys, I just got married a couple of months ago, but my mom is living with us, I mean, we dont have a problem with that, shes out all day at work and stuff, but shes getting divorced, so she is not going back to her house because of my dad.
The problem is that she is always bitchin about the way I keep my house...if this is clean, if this is not, if this looks bad...etc. I love my mom to death and so does my husband, but I dont appreciate her telling me what to do anymore, I dont want to hurt her feeling because I know she is going through a rough time..but Im really tired of that.
How can I tell her to stop messing with the way I keep my house without ofending her??

2007-10-19 20:21:38 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

do you agree or disagree
why
thanks a lot

2007-10-19 20:01:32 · 42 answers · asked by Anonymous

If you say yes, how many times did you sleep with him before deciding on him?

2007-10-19 19:55:00 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

Ive been in a relationship with my girl for 5 years. She is my soulmate but in those years she has kissed 4 guys that I know of behind my back and confessed she only kissed them. I love her but personally I have not ever cheated on her. I always imagined being with her in marriage but I don't know if it is right. Can you help me disect this situation? what could life be like with her? Am I kidding myself to think that this wont happen again and even, wont be worst and more than just a kiss? Advice please?

2007-10-19 19:53:42 · 33 answers · asked by AspiringLovDoctor 2

I am 18 and never had a girlfriend, not even my first kiss, or been on a date. I just graduated highschool and no girl ever found me attractive in all my years.I am in college now and still no girls find me attractive. I am a nice, kind, caring guy. I am built/athletic got really nice abs. I am pretty good looking. I love pretty much all sports. I am smart always had good grades. I like to have fun doing just about anything. The only thing I can think of is that I am really shy, but for no girl ever be attracted to me ever just because I am shy, so that cant be it. I just dont get why girls dont find me attractive what so ever, I cant understand what is so wrong with me,please help what is wrong with me??????????????????

I am in college and never even been close to a girl ever, I have also had very few friends that were girls, I dont know why but I must just not be cool enough or something I dont know I am just sick of it

2007-10-19 19:51:36 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous

If a couple divorce and remain in the same house ,but are living in seprate rooms [no sex] is she expected to do the same chores as she did when they were married.?He drinks until early morning and she stays home and does the cooking and cleaning [her choice].Can you give her some ideas as to what is now expected of her or not.Shes waiting for your new set of rules he and she can live by.He wants her to stay the same yet he goes out .she cant afford to leave but she hates the circumstances.I told her to grow some balls and do nothing for him go out and find a new life. am I right

2007-10-19 19:25:09 · 11 answers · asked by angelbaby1 3

He let him come in our house & sit on the couch while we were upstairs getting dressed. He also invited him to go with him to a football game tonight.

My concern is that my husband is being too nice, he has no type of guard up. I think that maybe we should get to know him a little better before we invite him in our house & all that. He could be someone who is scoping out the situation to possibly rob us or even a rapist, who knows.

My husband is always making new friends. I think he is too nice all the time, always giving others the benefit of the doubt before he get's stabbed in the back or something like that.

How should I go about confronting him with my concerns about having a stranger in our home. We have 2 young boys & my 2 nieces live with us as well. We are a young family @ 27 years old, but I still think we have a responsibility as parents & family to make sure our home is as safe as possible. I don't think that inviting strangers in is doing so!
Am I over-reacting?

2007-10-19 19:17:52 · 14 answers · asked by Ballagirl 2

2007-10-19 18:56:49 · 40 answers · asked by priya p 1

Hi all, my guy and I have heard that premarital counseling is crucial to a long-lasting marriage. We don't have too many issues, except we both kinda have tempers and I tend to fib in order to make his life less stressful. My question is, is counseling necessary? If it is, is it expensive?

2007-10-19 18:56:30 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-10-19 18:43:58 · 35 answers · asked by darrskater 1

Before I start, let me say:
I'm 46, and she's 23. I didn't marry her because she's young and hot or whatever. We're really in love. She has recently been diagnosed with Epilepsy since about a month now.

So I've noticed since this entire week, that my wife has always been saying things like, "Promise you'll always stay/be here. Stay with me." Stuff like that...almost like seperation anxiety. But I don't think that's it because ever since her new medical problem, I've had my eye on her 24/7. I myself am a doctor (cardiologist), and I go to all her doctor apointments with her neurologist. Her condition isn't cardiac. I don't know if this anxiety or whatever has anything to do with her medical situation.
She has also been really lovey-dovey with me. Always saying she loves me and stuff. Not that I don't like it, but it's just different.

Any ideas?

2007-10-19 18:42:40 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

So I am a 30 year old woman with 2 beautiful girls and I just kinda realized after 14 years with my high school sweetheart that I deserve and want better! Is it really possible, please tell me there is some one that will love me for me and my children? I feel like I still have so much to experience, I am not satisfied or fullfilled, and I am freaked out! Please any advice or life expierences welcomed. It's crazy, is it not?

2007-10-19 18:38:38 · 21 answers · asked by Dawnie 3

because i don't think so , people say i will. i mean if mother theresa can die as a virgin , i can too.

2007-10-19 18:30:52 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-10-19 18:26:15 · 23 answers · asked by Fancy You 6

I met a guy in July, he's your typical bad boy. We ended up hooking up, i got his #, never called,I knew he wanted nothing serious. 3 months later i contacted him thru myspace, he said we should meet up for drinks. we did the other night. i got really drunk and acted stupid. He had said earlier in the nite he'd fix my car. Next day, i texted saying, can you help me with my car still? he said, yes and he did help. He told me i had acted kind of crazy the night b4, but he laughed. He still has more of car to work on, but made it seem like he was really busy and woudnt be able to do it till next week. I went home (didnt hook up with him) but he thought i was going to stay. He said, ill call you next week. I feel a little bad that i havent heard from him. I mean my friend kept telling me he would ask about me, tell me he said hi, etc. he doesnt seem interested whatsoever! I feel like i will just text him sunday and ask if he can still fix my car?

2007-10-19 18:24:20 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

It just sucks. KJ's right cant sleep, eat, or find joy today. Any advice about moving on after being lied to and cheated on.... Revenge/... would be nice if only I could find her....

2007-10-19 18:20:36 · 19 answers · asked by itsjust me123 2

You meet someone and there is an instant attraction. You become friends with that person, and then you become really good friends with that person. After you've been really good friends for a while, you both decide to date each other. After dating for a few years, you both decide to get married. After marriage, you both live happily ever after.

Is this a good pattern for a "happily ever after" marriage?

*Please just answer the question. I already know that every couple does their own thing, and relationships are all different. So, please don't give me a lecture about that.

2007-10-19 18:19:16 · 6 answers · asked by Mr. Main Event 5

2007-10-19 17:59:48 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous 3

My wife and I have been married for two and a half years, together for over 4. We have a 3 year old son together and two boys (8 and 5) from her previous marriage. I am 30, she is 28.

I found out earlier this year that she had been cheating on me. After some back and forth, she says that she does love me and wants to stay. She said she was confused, but now knows that I am the one she wants to be with. She says that I should believe her because if she wanted to be with the other guy, she would just leave me. I know this guy and I know that he is deeply in love with her and willing and able to take care of her. So I dont think she is with me for security or financial reasons.
The problem is that she still goes out with her girlfriends almost once a week until late. She says she won't give up her friends for anything, but her frequent going out was the first sign of trouble. I wanted her to be more independent at first because she was very clingy, but now I want the old her.

2007-10-19 17:36:37 · 18 answers · asked by nobody 1

Should i invite her over for a night of fun? She has been secretly admiring us both. I am not bi but dont mind watching. So should i invite her over? lets see what can of worms i opened. lol.

2007-10-19 17:34:58 · 14 answers · asked by alicia s 1

There's that old saying "once a cheater, always a cheater" which I totally disagree with. I've cheated before, but I don't cheat anymore, for personal reasons. This question is not to find out who thinks this is true or false....this is for people who have cheated before or God forbid, cheating now.. Do you think this is something you will do all your life or when you feel it's time are you willing to make a change?

2007-10-19 17:18:48 · 33 answers · asked by Tnisha 1

She did it before we married, but now she does it constantly, and tells me to get used to it, I did it before we got married, and I am not changing. And she wonders why I don't feel attracted as I used to be

2007-10-19 17:12:40 · 42 answers · asked by PJ 2

Its more complicated than the title states really...

We dated for 3 years, lived together for 2. We broke up 3 months ago, when I was 9 months pregnant because he wanted her to be put up for adoption, and I refused. We are still close, and have only regained our closeness after our daughters birth, he worships the ground she walks on, and curses the fact that he ever asked me to give her up. We are now just "friends". He asks me to stay over his place at least three times a week with our daughter, mind you, its only DURING the week. the weekends he still spends at the bar and partying with friends. When we do get together, theres always something in it for him, whether it be getting a ride to work (he doesnt have a car!) or getting a ride to do errands etc. Basically, he gets the benefits of a relationship with me (sleepign NEXT to me, but no...we don't "fool around" at all anymore) without the title or commitment.

2007-10-19 17:12:27 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous