Jokes & Riddles - December 2007

These were actual hospital patient reports...enjoy!

1. The patient refused autopsy.

2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

6. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.

7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.

11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

12. She is numb from her toes down.

2007-12-01 20:41:29 · 15 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

A doctor walks into the room and tells his patient, "I have some bad news and some very bad news."

The patient, resigned to his fate, says, "Well, might as well give me the bad news first."

"The lab called with your test results," the doctor began. "Unfortuanately, you've got a rare condition and they said you have 24 hours to live."

"24 Hours!?" exclaimed the patient. "Thats terrible! What could be worse than that? What's the very bad news?"

"I've been trying to reach you since yesterday."

2007-12-01 20:39:15 · 17 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

After three crop failures in a row farmer Jones could not pay his loan at the bank. "Give me one more chance he pleaded. Don't take my farm, we'll be broke and homeless."

The bank manager comes up with an idea. "OK, one more chance but not with crops. No one fails at pig farming so we'll finance the purchase of five sows to start you off. Your neighbor down the road has a boar pig and you'll have to take your sows to him so the boar can service them. In a few months you should have a bunch of little piglets all ready for market.

Farmer Jones collects the five sows, loads them into his pickup truck, drives to his neighbor and unloads the five sows into the boar's pen. They then go back to the farm house and have a couple of beers.

When enough time has passed they go back to the boar's pen and load five happy sows into the pickup. Farmer Jones asks, "What if it didn't take?"

"That never happens with my boar," replies the neighbor.

"But how can I tell for sure?"

"Look, tomorrow morning observe your sows. If they're rolling in the mud, it took, if they're on the grass, call me."

The following morning farmer Jones observed his sows strolling on the grass. He calls his neighbor who instructs him to bring them back. He rounds them up, loads them into the pickup and drives to the boar's pen where the whole process is repeated.

Unlucky farmer Jones has to load them in the pickup and take them back four times. On the fifth morning he is so worried he can't look. He stalls for half an hour then asks his wife to look. "I hope they're not on the grass, dear."

"Well they're not," says his wife.

"Oh finally, then they're rolling in the mud!" exclaimed the farmer.

"No..."

"Well what are those fool sows doing?

"Well, four are trying to climb into the pickup and the fifth managed to climb into the cab and is trying to honk the horn!!!"

2007-12-01 20:29:07 · 21 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

A man was blissfully driving along the highway, when he saw the Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the Bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car and was hit. The basket of eggs went flying all over the place.

The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road, and got out to see what had become of the Bunny carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colorful Bunny was dead. The driver felt guilty and began to cry.

A woman driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong.

"I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny and killed it. There may not be an Easter because of me. What should I do?"

The woman told the man not to worry. She knew exactly what to do. She went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the limp, dead Bunny, and sprayed the entire contents of the can onto the little furry animal.

Miraculously the Easter Bunny came to back life, jumped up, picked up the spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two humans and hopped on down the road. 50 yards away the Easter Bunny stopped, turned around, waved and hopped on down the road another 50 yards, turned, waved, hopped another 50 yards and waved again!

The man was astonished. He said to the woman, "What in heaven's name is in your spray can? What was it that you sprayed on the Easter Bunny?" The woman turned the can around so that the man could read the label. It said: "Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."

2007-12-01 20:17:02 · 18 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

This guy needs a job and decides to apply at the zoo. As it happened, their star attraction, a gorilla, had passed away the night before and they had carefully preserved his hide.

They tell this guy that they'll pay him well if he would dress up in the gorillas skin and pretend to be the gorilla so people will keep coming to the zoo.

Well, the guy has his doubts, but he needs the money, so he puts on the skin and goes out into the cage.

The people all cheer to see him. He plays up to the audience and they just eat it up. This isn't so bad, he thinks, and he starts really putting on a show, jumping around, beating his chest and roaring, swinging around.

During one acrobatic attempt, though, he loses his balance and crashes through some safety netting, landing square in the middle of the lion cage! As he lies there stunned, the lion roars.

He's terrified and starts screaming, "Help, Help, Help!"

The lion races over to him, places his paws on his chest and hisses, "Shut up or we'll BOTH lose our jobs!"

2007-12-01 20:10:41 · 24 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

Little Johnny's mother decided to give her son an anatomy lesson one day, so she took off all of her clothes and pointed to her vagina, saying, "Johnny, this is where you came from."

Johnny went to school the next day smiling and insisting that all his friends now refer to him as "Lucky Johnny."

"Why?" one asked.

Johnny held his fingers an inch apart and said, "Because I came this close to being a turd".

2007-12-01 20:05:50 · 19 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 a.m., regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11:00 a.m. on; Sunday, so a worldwide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents.

The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 a.m., all of the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits.

Just when the clock struck 11:00, Pookie Johnson, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.

2007-12-01 20:04:28 · 13 answers · asked by jockman432004 4

Little Johnny is sitting in biology class, when his teacher states the fact that only humans stutter, and no other animal in the world does.

Johnny raises his hand and says. "You're wrong, Miss Finch!"

"Really, would you mind telling us why that is Johnny?," replies the teacher.

"Well, Miss Finch, the other day I was playing with my cat on the porch. The neighbors' Rottweiler came around the corner, and my cat went "fffff! fffff! fffff!", and before he could say "F*ck!", the dog ate him!"

2007-12-01 20:03:18 · 18 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

Little Johnny's teacher asks, "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Do any of you know why his father didn't punish him?"

Little Johnny replies, "Because George was the one holding the axe?

2007-12-01 19:59:31 · 17 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night, face all covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.

Pretty soon all the other bats smelt the blood and began hassling him about where he got it. He told them to p*ss off and let him get some sleep, but they persisted until he finally gave in.

OK, follow me, he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him. Down through a valley they went, across a river and into a huge forest.

Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him tongues hanging out for blood.

"Do you see that large oak tree over there?" he asked. "YES, YES, YES!!!!" the bats all screamed in a frenzy.

"Good!" said the first bat, "Because I f*cking didn't"

2007-12-01 19:49:43 · 18 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

A woman was thinking about finding a pet to help keep her company at home. She decided she would like to find a beautiful parrot. It wouldn't be as much work as a dog, and it would be fun to hear it speak. She went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large beautiful parrot. She went to the owner of the store and asked how much the bird cost.
The owner said it was $50.

Delighted that such a rare looking and beautiful bird wasn't more expensive, she agreed to buy it.

The owner looked at her and said, "Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to live in a whorehouse and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff."

The woman thought about this, but decided she had to have the bird. She told the owner that she still wanted the bird. The pet shop owner sold her the bird and she took it home. She hung the bird's cage up in her living room and waited for it to say something. The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said, "New house, new madam."

The woman was a bit shocked at the implication, but then thought "that's not so bad,"

A couple hours later, the woman's two teenage daughters returned from school. When they inspected the bird, it looked at them and said, "New house, new madam, new whores." The girls and the woman were a bit offended at first, but then began to laugh about the situation.

A couple of hours later, the woman's husband, came home from work. The bird looked at him and said, "New house, new madam, new whores... ...same old faces. Hi Ray."

2007-12-01 19:46:01 · 17 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her poodle along for company.

One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a hungry-looking leopard heading rapidly in his direction.

The poodle thinks, "Oh, oh!" Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. "Whew!", says the leopard, "That was close! That poodle nearly had me!"

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

The leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, monkey, hop on my back so you can watch me chew that poodle to bits!"

Now, the poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?", but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and waits until they get just close enough to hear.

"Where's that damn monkey?" the poodle says, "I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!"

2007-12-01 19:42:43 · 16 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

A man is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little
Perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Golly, I
wonder what happened to this parrot?"

The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."

"Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered
me!"

"I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly
intelligent, thoroughly educated bird ..."

"Oh yeah?" the man asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto your
perch without any feet?"

"Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you
asked,
I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't
see it because of my feathers."

"Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English can't
you?"

"Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with
reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion, sports,
physics, and philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You really
ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion."

The man looks at the $200.00 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't afford
that."

"Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody
wants me 'cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20.
Just make the guy an offer!"

The man offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.

Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor,
he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he
sympathizes, and he's insightful. The man is delighted.

One day the man comes home from work and the parrot goes,
"Psssssssssssst," and motions him over with one wing. "I don't know if
I
should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman."

"What are you talking about?" asks the man.

"When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at
the
door in a sheer black nightie."

"WHAT???" the guy says incredulously. "THEN what happened?"

"Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie
and began petting her all over," reported the parrot.

"NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"

"Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees
and began to kiss her all over...."

Then the frantic man screams, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"

"Damned if I know. I got an erection and fell off my perch!"

2007-12-01 19:28:56 · 15 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

2007-12-01 18:51:15 · 7 answers · asked by Ahmed 2

Okay, the seller does not want it, the buyer does not need it, and the user doesn't see it. What is it?

2007-12-01 18:33:40 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

A drunk was proudly showing off his new apartment to a couple of his friends late one night.
He led the way to his bedroom where there was a big brass gong and a mallet.

"What's with the big brass gong?" one of the guests asked.

"It's not a gong. It's a talking clock," the drunk slurred in response.

"A talking clock? Seriously?" asked his astonished friend.

"Yup," replied the drunk.

"How's it work?" the friend asked, squinting at it.

"Watch," the drunk replied. He stumbled across the room, picked up the mallet, gave the gong an ear-shattering pound, and stepped back.

The three stood in silence, looking at one another for a moment.

Suddenly, someone on the other side of the wall screamed, "You A@#$*)%
..it's three-fifteen in the morning!!"

2007-12-01 17:48:15 · 14 answers · asked by jockman432004 4

Need I explain myself? Zzz...

2007-12-01 17:25:59 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

A man was convicted of killing 35 ppl by running them over. At the court, the judge asks, "How the hell did you run over 35 ppl?!!!"...He said, "Well your honor heres what happened, I was going down a hill and one of my tires popped so i lost control of the car. On the left side of the road there was two guys walkin and on the right, there was a wedding going on. Your honor what direction would you steer to?"...The judge said "Definetly the two on the left". The man said "Your honor that is what I did". Shocked the judge replied "but how did you run over 35 ppl?"...The man replied, "Well I went after the two men, BUT those idiots ran towards the WEDDING!!!"

lol...star me if its good

2007-12-01 17:23:15 · 9 answers · asked by blacksmith 3

A little boy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores. "Not yet," said the little boy. His mother tells him no breakfast till the chores are done.

Well, he's a little pissed, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken.

He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow.

He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig.

He goes back in for breakfast, and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal. "How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks. "Well," his mother says, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig,so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cow, so for a week you aren't getting any milk."

Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.

The little boy looks up at his mother and with a smile says: "Are you going to tell him, or should I ?

2007-12-01 17:21:18 · 19 answers · asked by Fiona 3

Computer Diagnosis
One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks."
Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:
"Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."

2007-12-01 16:44:31 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

A man bought a donkey from a preacher and was told it had been trained in a very unique way. The only way to make the donkey go,is to say "Hallelujah!" to make it stop, say "Amen" so after a short practice and pleased with his purchase, the man , with a ""Hallelujah" rode off

He traveled a long time through the mountains and as he headed towards a cliff, he tried to remember the word to make the donkey stop.

"Stop," said the man. "Halt!" he cried. The donkey just kept going. "Oh no....:"
"bible...Church!...Please! Stop " shouted the man. The donkey just began to trot faster. He was getting closer and closer to the edge of the cliff.

Finally in desperation, the man said a prayer.."Please, dear Lord, make this donkey stop before I go off the end of this cliff, in Jesus name. AMEN."

The donkey came to an abrupt stop and just one step from the edge of the cliff.

'HALLELUJAH.' shouted the man.

2007-12-01 16:40:13 · 21 answers · asked by marlynembrindle 5

This guy at the supermarket walks up to this cute checkout girl and sets his basket down...she starts ringing him out...Frozen Pizzas, Hungry Man dinners, a couple Maxim Magazines, a six pack of beer and some cigarettes. After giving him the total she looks up at him and says, "You're a bachelor huh?"
The man, smugly smiling, replies, "Yeah, how could ya tell!?" The checkout girl replies back, "'cause your ******' ugly."

2007-12-01 16:18:04 · 3 answers · asked by sivdog21 3

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with a demon...

Demon: Why so glum chum?
Guy: What do you think? I'm in hell.
Demon: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here...you a drinkin' man?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink. Love the drinks.
Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy: Gee that sounds great.

Demon: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it! Love the smoking.
Demon: Alright! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no biggie - you're already dead remember?
Guy: Wow...that's...awesome!

Demon: I bet you like to gamble.
Guy: Why yes as a matter of fact I do. Love the gambling.
Demon: Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever... If you go Bankrupt...well you're dead anyhow.

Demon: You into drugs?
Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...
Demon: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want and if ya overdose - that's right - you're dead - who cares! O.D.!!
Guy: Yowza! I never realized Hell was such a swingin' place!!

Demon: You gay?
Guy: Uh no.

Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you're really gonna hate Fridays.

2007-12-01 15:50:17 · 8 answers · asked by EmeryJae 2

Now that i have your attention, can you tell me a joke that will make me laugh harder than I have ever laughed in my life? I mean pee your pants funny. Roll on the floor holding your belly laughing for 20 min. kind of laugh. Give it your best shot. At least you got 2 points for answering the question. Ten if i pee my pants i laugh so hard at your joke...

2007-12-01 15:50:14 · 19 answers · asked by HollyHogwarts 3

A man awakens at midnight.
He turns on a light and gets a drink.
He returns to bed.
He awakens again at 8:00 AM.
He looks out a window and sees
a dead body on the ground.
He is so distraught that he
commits suicide

What has happened here and why?

2007-12-01 15:19:59 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

Funny or not?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE5sok1qCPw&feature=related

2007-12-01 14:38:35 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous

when god opened the first door it was a big party drinking,dancing singing etc.god says thats the cristians...in the second door was gambling,cards craps keno bingo god said thats the catholics...when they got to the third door god said in a wisper we cant go in there we gotta be quiot..why he asks god....its the witnesses they think theyre the only ones up here...

im not religios but its not to offend anyone....
i think spellcheck is broken...it said no errors

2007-12-01 14:34:39 · 4 answers · asked by dusty3608 2

Riddle


Tiger! Tiger! Tiger! was the call!
Motzinick! Motzinick! Motzinick! came out!
But lo, the tiger, by all names and seasons,
Did not dine on Motzinick today.
His father was the reason...

For Jamolacka stood grim of eye and hand...
Ghost on his left.
Darkness on his right.
Railroad running back, ahead.
In the morning, on the tracks,
Little Motzinick found his father dead,
And Jamolacka striding out of sight.

What perilous plight on India's soil
'Tween British and Moghul...
Island, jungle, do not mix.
No matter Madagascar.


Elysabeth Faslund...Poemhunter.com

2007-12-01 14:25:16 · 5 answers · asked by Elysabeth 7

Ace ventura 1
"EINHORN IS A MAN!!!!!!!!"
"Let's see that again in super slow-mo!!!!!"
"I can't do it captain...."
"I am heinz.... trainer of ze dolfin..."
"Warning assholes are closer than they appear"
Ace Ventura 2
"There’s only one area of the Jungle with red baring fungus macula"
"You must be the monopoly guy....*whispers* "Thanks for the free parking..."
“Spank you spanky helper”
“LIKE A GLOVE!”
Dumb & Dumber
“Its ok I’m a Limo driver!”
“We got no food, we got no job, ARE PET'S HEADS ARE FALLING OFF!”
“Mary I desperately wanna make love to a school boy”
“I was robbed by a sweet little old lady on a motorized cart….didn’t even see it comin!”
In Living Color
“A few years ago during a crazy body building fad I had my uterus turned into a tobacco pouch….. care for a pinch?”
“No pain no gain!”
“When these babies start to pucker look out Michelle Pfeiffer !"
“Just admit it when you make love to your wife it’s my face that makes you shiver”

2007-12-01 14:09:20 · 9 answers · asked by stroberocksluv 1

old Seamus Flattery is upstairs dying and the neighbor women are downstairs with Seamus' wife cooking for the wake. The neighborhood men are out in the back passing a pint and the priest is coming every three hours to say the rosary.

But old Seamus comes out of his coma and calls weakly for his wife: "Johanna, Johanna ... "

Downstairs one of the ladies hears him and says to Johanna: "It's himself, he's calling for you."

So, Johanna climbs upstairs quickly and comes in the room.

Johanna: "Oh Seamus me darling what it is?"

Seamus: "Is that a ham I smell cooking down there?"

Johanna: "Oh aye it tis indeed - a fine big ham."

Seamus: "And did you put the cloves to it and cover it with mustard?"

Johanna: "Oh aye, its just the way you like it."

Seamus: "And would you be after cutting me a small piece?"

Johanna: "Oh Seamus you

2007-12-01 13:55:42 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous