These were actual hospital patient reports...enjoy!
1. The patient refused autopsy.
2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
6. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
12. She is numb from her toes down.
2007-12-01 20:41:29 · 15 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Bloomers pmsl, Bloopers
2007-12-01 20:43:19 · update #1
#12, I see another blonde joke, coming! lol.
2007-12-02 04:05:03 · answer #1 · answered by larry m♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was a medical rep. for thirty years so I really enoyed your hospital jokes, I'll have to think of some of my cleaner ones. Here's one I prepared earlier:-
After an extremely difficult and complicated caesarean section, using all his best team.
The operating Gynaecologist, whiping his brow said, "Do you know, after all that, I don't know whether it's a boy or a girl?"
After a moment, a young scrub nurse pipes up "Let me have a look, I can tell".
ps. I've taken the liberty of adding you to my contact list, if you would like to share jokes, please let me know, also if there are any taboo subjects and varieties of blue you enjoy.
2007-12-01 21:32:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Funny! 100!
2007-12-01 22:07:11 · answer #3 · answered by cats 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
michele what have you had for breakfast it certainly has made you go funny haha now I must get away as I am getting a stitch from laffin so much thank you for the brilliant start to what was t deffinately a misrable morning xxx
2007-12-01 20:50:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lol. Nothing more funny than stating the 'not quite' obvious!
2007-12-02 00:01:49 · answer #5 · answered by Kitty Katty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ha ha ha funny
thanks for a laugh
10/10
2007-12-01 23:14:24 · answer #6 · answered by Luck dragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice one.
2007-12-02 00:41:51 · answer #7 · answered by gentleman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats funny
2007-12-01 21:59:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ha ha
2007-12-01 21:11:33 · answer #9 · answered by Kerry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is funny and nice to read
2007-12-01 21:33:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋