Jokes & Riddles - June 2006

In old days, a youg newly married couple in early teens were together for the first time.
The guy did not know how to do it. The first place he found was the belle button. He kept on doing it on the belle button. The girl got tired of this.
One night she put some oil from belle button to the real place. The guy came and started from the belle button and slipped into the real place.
He jumped up and cried, " I cut up my wife's stomach".
He runs out to the local doctor. Doctor listens to his problem and tells him,
"Don't worry. You did the right surgery. Go back and stick to the new place."

2006-06-30 23:44:40 · 17 answers · asked by Pd 6

2006-06-30 23:36:24 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

It is found in africa and some in austrailia.

2006-06-30 23:34:55 · 21 answers · asked by Landing claw 1

I can't find it anywhere... *!Help!*

http://groups/yahoo.com/groups/jokesforthereallybored

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2006-06-30 23:28:36 · 14 answers · asked by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7

2006-06-30 23:08:50 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-30 22:56:19 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

What can leave a football match straight after a game mid-week, but can't leave until Monday when the game is on a Saturday?

2006-06-30 22:56:04 · 8 answers · asked by amourjardin 1

2006-06-30 22:52:29 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous

And if you can please tell some tongue twisters pls

2006-06-30 22:39:33 · 7 answers · asked by siddharth kumar 2

and crack too?

2006-06-30 22:18:19 · 14 answers · asked by CUTTIE GIRL 1

2006-06-30 22:09:24 · 15 answers · asked by uclatino22 2

2006-06-30 22:05:17 · 5 answers · asked by Wolfie 7

An elderly Italian Jewish man wanted to unburden his guilty conscience by talking to his Rabbi. "Rabbi, during World War II, when the Germans entered Italy, I pretended to be a 'goy" and changed my name from Levi to Spamoni and I am alive today because of it."
"Its ok self preservation is important" said Rabbi.
"And, a beautiful Jewish woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans. I hid her in my attic and they never found her."
"That was a wonderful thing you did and you have no need to feel guilty."
"It's worse Rabbi. I was weak and allowed her to repay me for my efforts with her sexual favours."
"You were both in great danger and would have suffered terribly if the Germans had found her. There is a favourable balance between good and evil and you will be judged kindly. Give up your feelings of guilt."
"Thank you, Rabbi. That's a great load off my mind. But I have one more question."
"And what is that?"

"Should I tell her that the WAR IS OVER?"

2006-06-30 21:43:35 · 7 answers · asked by Pd 6

Links, forums with links, etc...

2006-06-30 21:42:32 · 3 answers · asked by CreeruMic 2

BOO!

2006-06-30 21:27:22 · 10 answers · asked by Jason 3

1. How will you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps?

2. How will you put a zebra in a fridge in 4 steps?

3. The King of the Jungle, the lion, is having a wedding ceremony. All of the animals come to attend the ceremony except one. Which one is it and why doesn't it come?

4. A man has to desperately cross the river to get from one place to the other in a Jungle. The river is known for having deadly alligators in it. There is no boat. How is he going to make it to the other place?

First person to solve all the answers correctly will receive 10 points

2006-06-30 21:26:35 · 5 answers · asked by charmzi_babe 1

Looking for some funny jokes people. Please make me laugh!

2006-06-30 21:23:37 · 32 answers · asked by Trish 2

There is a killer who wanted to kill both person in one of the table in a bar. The two person ordered both Gin rock and they recieved thier order at the same time. one person drank the gin by one gulp and the other drank it by sipping the gin little by little. After an hour, the one who sipped the gin died while the other one survived. Question: Why only one preson died and how did the killer killed the person. 10 points for the first person to answer correctly.

2006-06-30 21:12:41 · 7 answers · asked by ? 2

Scientists in the United States revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.
To prove their theory, they fed one hundred men twelve pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't drive.

2006-06-30 21:00:10 · 19 answers · asked by Pd 6

Life willter CALTIIIIII Shucks on TREEEEEEEEEEEEE nooooo LUvVv........can neone figrue tat out??

2006-06-30 20:57:53 · 6 answers · asked by abby ! 1

A man walks into a bar and sits down. He notices
a foot-tall piano player playing up a storm.

Man: Hey, this guy's really good! Where'd you get
him?

Barkeep: Oh, I have a magic lamp that gives me
anything I want.

Man: Can I try?

Barkeep: Sure just rub it and say what you want.

Man (rubbing the lamp): I wish for ten thousand
bucks.

* Ten thousand ducks appear *

Man: What the hell happened? I asked for 10,000
BUCKS, not DUCKS!

Barkeep: Think I asked for a twelve inch pianist?

2006-06-30 20:55:16 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

1st to get it right gets best answer

2006-06-30 20:45:03 · 5 answers · asked by Ce-Ce 2

there are three men sitting at a bar in the wild west, one american, one austalian, one canadain. the american finishes of his drink and throws the glass in the air, draws his gun and shoots it, he turns around and looks at the other two and say's, in the states were rich enough that we dont have to drink out of the same glass twice, suddenly the australian throws his glass up and grabs the americans gun and shoots the glass, and puts the americans gun on the bar and say's, in australia we go so much sand that glass is cheap to, then the canadain grabs the gun and shoots the american and looks at the australian and say's in canada we have so many americans we dont have to drink with the same one twice.

hahaha it's just a joke.

2006-06-30 20:43:28 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

found these Viagra jokes wanted to share a few with you.

A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex.


The doctor gives her a pill, but warns her it is still experimental and tells her to slip it into his mashed potatoes at dinner.


So, that night at dinner, she does. About a week later she's back at the doctor's office.


She says, "Doc, the pill worked great! I put it in the potatoes like you suggested. It wasn't five minutes and he jumps up, rakes all the food and dishes off the table, grabs me, rips all my clothes off and ravishes me right then and there on the table."


The doctor says, "I'm sorry, we didn't realize the pill was that strong. The foundation will be glad to pay for any damages."


"Naah..." she says, "that's okay. We wouldn't go back to that restaurant anyway."


: What do you get when you mix Viagra and Prozac?
A: A guy who is ready to go, but doesn't really care where.

2006-06-30 20:37:59 · 7 answers · asked by JenniT 6

....That hurt A LOT! Why do I ALWAYS leave that thing right in my path???

2006-06-30 20:35:47 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

first person to have the correct answer gets the 10 points.

2006-06-30 20:30:24 · 11 answers · asked by ? 2

Take a step ten times backwards from a letter... Z... give me a letter and win!

2006-06-30 20:30:06 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

it's an easy one, hehehe.

2006-06-30 20:20:10 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

the 10th person to answer correctly will get best answer

2006-06-30 20:09:42 · 13 answers · asked by Ce-Ce 2

What is at the end of the universe?

2006-06-30 20:09:22 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous