Marriage & Divorce - 21 October 2007

My boyfriend and I are making a list of questions for each other before we move in together (we have been together for 2 years) We are going to create questions about our future goals and we are exchanging them for each other to answer so we can see how we feel about certain issues that we haven't discussed or haven't thought of. Some of my questions are
1. What type of job or career is each of us working toward?
2. How much do we need to live on? Want to live on?
3. Will we live near our families or not?
4. Will one of us be willing to be a stay-at-home parent?
Okay...You get the idea. Help me to create topics we should discuss before moving in together and taking our relationship to the next level. please give me some questions you think are important in your relationship that maybe I have not thought of yet.
Thank you for your participation. If you don't have something nice to say, then don't bother. This is just something we are doing to learn more and have fun!

2007-10-21 12:26:34 · 20 answers · asked by l'il mama 5

I am having a problem with my husband not knowing what I like. I have tried to give him "hints" but he is just not getting it. I am stopping short of just telling him. I want to bop him in the head. How can guys be so dumb. Thinking of trading this defective model in for something new and shiny. Am I being selfish? Why doesen't he just "get it"? I don't want to have to teach him how to be a man and how to lead. It's like I am lowering myself trying to tell him what I want. Right? I am not the first woman he has dated, he should know these things. It's not my fault.

2007-10-21 12:20:39 · 10 answers · asked by Magnus01 3

My married friend has been having an affair with a woman he really likes. But he always complains that she is moody, difficult, snobbish, and sometimes ignores him. But he also tells me that she loves him, and that when she is nice she gives him attention which he adores as he does not have it with his wife.
Lately, over an argument, he left her house in a hurry and she was so pissed off that she called his house at 4 in the morning! Repetitively, a million times. He answered (the whole house had woken up!) and she swore and insulted him and asked to 'speak to his wife' just to scare him.
He was so shocked that he did not know what to do.
Next day she calls and tells him she loves him, blablabla. He tells her that he can't get over what she did, and lost his trust in her.
What I don't understand is : he still calls her, and he tells me that she has many problems and she needs his help,. that he still cares for her, still loves her, but is confused what to do.
Why talk to her???

2007-10-21 12:13:56 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband is a mean angry man with a bad drinking problem. He went to jail for beating me up. I have moved away from him. What happens in court whem someone is charged with Domectic Violence?

2007-10-21 12:05:02 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

He is a recovering alcoholic and now claims he has changed for the better. He also has experienced depression but claims he is a new person. He keeps trying to win me back. Should I give him another chance or keep him out of my life forever? We have no children. Opinions?

2007-10-21 11:59:36 · 33 answers · asked by cats 7

Last night, my bf and I went to a law school dance. We ended up fighting, and we'd both had a few drinks. The fighting turned into us screaming at each other outside the dorm. A resident called campus police, and we were separated for the night. It was a really stupid incident. Anyway, this morning, I went to talk to my bf, and he said that he loves me, I'm the woman of his dreams, and that he thinks I'm awesome, but he can't handle being in a relationship which resulted in the cops having to come.

I am dying inside right now. I was convinced I wanted to marry this guy. We've been dating for a year and 3 months, and we broke up once in the past (another late-night fight). But, most things are great in our relationship. I feel lost right now, and I just want to know what you think he'll do (i.e. take me back), and what I can do to reconcile this.

Thank you so much.

2007-10-21 11:51:11 · 10 answers · asked by skichamonix515 3

I am 17 years old. I graduated high school last year. In a few months, I will be a sophomore in college. I have been with the same guy for 3 years. I love him very much, and we have both given up so much so that we could be together. I have lived with him since I graduated. He joined the Air Force, and we want to get married. When he comes back from basic training, we can get married, and we can live in a house on base. i will be 18 the month after we get married, and He will have turned 20 a couple months before. some of the people that I care about the most are telling me that I am too young.Some of them won't even talk to us anymore! Most people aren't a sophomore in college and living on their own until they are 20. And they said if I were 20, they wouldn't have a problem with me getting married. They don't look at what I've done in my life, just my age. I could understand if I haven't finished high school, and got pregnant, but that is not the case.

2007-10-21 11:15:14 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

2 lawyers, I petitioned. Getting towards end, what's going on with the paperwork?
Called my lawyers office numerous times about paperwork that was suppose to be emailed or faxed over from the opposing side (husbands). My lawyer has said never received from opposing lawyer for approval of documents for finalization of divorce. This has gone on for weeks. Opposing lawyer has said sent paperwork numerous times, and I, to the point of frustration got a hold of the paperwork to be looked over by my lawyer and FAXED it myself, to no avail. Not to mention that the files of that information was sent from my email address about a month ago as well to my lawyer. I just want this divorce over with. What is going on? I am on speaking terms with my husband (soon to be ex), and he thinks it is my lawyers fault and that he is being hesitant. Is there something I should know? Tried calling my lawyer and only spoke to the secretary who said this happens alot (paperwork not sent by opposing lawyer). What difference is it whether I faxed and emailed it to him or his attorney?

2007-10-21 11:08:01 · 4 answers · asked by BeautifulRose 3

Tonight is my 34th weding anniversary and every year he sits there like a big kid waiting for his presents, and never gets me anything. He doesen't even bother opening his cards. Whatever the occasion, I've never had anything from him. Not even when the kids were born. Not even a daisy from the garden! He's had everything you can think of and all he says to me is I'll get you something tomorrow, but he never does. My kids have grown up sick of his uncaring attitude and non interest in everything. Well right now he's sitting downstairs and I've bought him nothing for the first time, he's expecting a gift which is not coming. But Im getting scared, I can't take drinks off him anymore, I've caught him crushing up tablets in my tea cup a few times, and found open condoms in his wallet. I've confronted him, but he denies it. He's worked permament nights in a hotel for 8 years. I've tried talking to him, but he's to bad tempered and angry. I have nowhere to go. What should I do?

2007-10-21 10:59:43 · 48 answers · asked by julie p 1

2007-10-21 10:53:01 · 19 answers · asked by badbitty101 2

2007-10-21 10:44:55 · 51 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-10-21 10:44:53 · 11 answers · asked by Butterfly 2

Were you happy before you were married? I ask because I've read more than once that you should never expect your spouse to suddenly make you happy after marriage...

So to happy couple.. Do you think your state of mind before marriage had alot to do with things working out so well years later?

2007-10-21 10:43:30 · 11 answers · asked by Undead 3

Two weeks ago, my dad was extremely busy making dinner and I was helping him in the kitchen and he wanted my mum and older sister to be home by 6:30 pm so we could all sit down and have a family dinner and then at 7 pm he would leave cause he has an business appointment. He wanted them home at 6:30 on the dot.

My mum called home 10 minutes before 6:30 and said they were leaving the office now, and he got really mad cause then he wouldn't have to waste his time waiting for them to come home and wouldn't have had to make dinner so early (he could've been doing other things). When they came home, he started screaming at her saying how come you only called 10 minutes before 6:30, why didn't you call earlier? and other stuff. She started screaming back at him and threw a spoon at him and then he blew up and said he wasn't eating dinner with us and stormed out of the house.

He spent three nights sleeping in the living room and said he wouldn't forgive her unless she apologized to him

2007-10-21 10:37:47 · 9 answers · asked by Duchess of Cookieshire 6

I am 14 years old, my mom and dad have been divorced since I was 3.I live with my mom and stepdad and little brother. I don't really have much to do with my dad as he don't have much to do with me. The question I have is how old do I have to be to deside when I what to see my dad if at all.I order by the courts to go to my dads every other weekend and split holidays.I live in Minnesota, what are my rights? 14 and need to know.

2007-10-21 10:34:49 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous

i am a newly wed....and guess what? i have absolutely no desire to have sex.
you can imagine the stress that is already adding to the relationship.
he and i were sexually active at the start of our relationship- then realizing that we wanted to base our relationship on other things- not that- and put The Lord first- we stopped.
so, for a year we went without major contact.
i am not sure if this is all a mental block that i have created- bc i wanted to do the right thing or if something is really wrong with me.
can anyone relate? any suggestions?????
4 weeks of marriage- sex 3 times.
not happy.

2007-10-21 10:25:32 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-10-21 10:16:51 · 25 answers · asked by Beck E 1

I have been married for 12 years . I assumed we were meant for each other. we have agreed to separate, but cant because of finances. part of our problem.I love my wife completely.how do i leave my whole life wife ,kids,home, behind ?

2007-10-21 10:12:25 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous

On our anniversary after being bestfriends few years before getting into love physical relationship with my best friend would like to make sure this relationship has future.I want to know if he plans to marry me sometime in near future sees me as being wife and mother to his kids when time comes.Please give me few questions i can casually ask him so i can know if we turn our relationship from best friends to lovers we have future will get married someday or dont want love relationship with physical intimacy being virgin ruining friendship of years.

2007-10-21 10:07:48 · 4 answers · asked by earthworldsky 1

I have been living and sharing expenses with the same person for over three years and have discovered banking activity for just her. I first asked if what she used the account for and she told me she was saving money for a mutual purpose. I asked about the balance and she said she was putting extra money into a loan payment which made automatic deductions ; a savvy savings plan; but not the part that angers me. I searched around and found receipts. A deposit over $3000 was made and at present it is about $400. The deposit was from her selling stock shares. She told me that she got $1000 for the transaction. Then as we discussed it further, a rental property income was deposited into that same account for $1000. Now in my mind that is $4100 that is now unaccounted for.
I had been working overtimethis past summer and all I earned is not in the savings, as we had planned.
I feel hurt, ignorant and resentful for the mismanaging of our money and her lack of honesty. Is this a forgivable?

2007-10-21 10:05:31 · 14 answers · asked by GrumpyLumpkin 1

I think most of us have heard that phrase "for better or for worse." Is it really worth it though? I ask people on here and they give me the same answers, "Sorry, honey, you married him and you're stuck. You married for better or worse, remember? Now quit being selfish!"

I think that life is just too short to still be married and have your life become worse. What if that person is being beaten up physically, emotionally, or feeling unloved? Is it really worth it to just stay in the marriage just for the sake of marriage? What if you've done what you could do already and nothing's changed? Do you think that person has turned back on his/her vows when he/she finally decides to divorce because the marriage has gotten worse?

2007-10-21 09:45:44 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

Tonight is my 34th weding anniversary and every year he sits there like a big kid waiting for his presents, and never gets me anything. He doesen't even bother opening his cards. Whatever the occasion, I've never had anything from him. Not even when the kids were born. Not even a daisy from the garden! He's had everything you can think of and all he says to me is I'll get you something tomorrow, but he never does. My kids have grown up sick of his uncaring attitude and non interest in everything. Well right now he's sitting downstairs and I've bought him nothing for the first time, he's expecting a gift which is not coming. But Im getting scared, I can't take drinks off him anymore, I've caught him crushing up tablets in my tea cup a few times, and found open condoms in his wallet. I've confronted him, but he denies it. He's worked permament nights in a hotel for 8 years. I've tried talking to him, but he's to bad tempered and angry. I have nowhere to go. What should I do?

2007-10-21 09:36:49 · 22 answers · asked by julie p 1

and the business went bust. They went bust 22 years ago but They are still paying (well she is) off the debt. Her ex wont pay any money back and is drinking heavily. It was his business but she was a partner. Is there any way she could make him pay or get out of the rest of the payments? She wants a divorce, will that help? She is getting very depressed at not having any money but he has lots?

2007-10-21 09:19:00 · 4 answers · asked by charlie_t 3

divorced or you and your wife got divorced and found another mate, would you tell your children? Why or why not?

2007-10-21 09:13:05 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous

If your meeting for alone first time after few public social meetings known eachother as family friends for decades and friends with eachother for 5 years if you are strongly attracted to each other sexually how far would you go on that meeting where physically intimacy is concerned being a virgin being in love if you have no idea when your next meeting is due to circumstances.

2007-10-21 09:09:12 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

It's a gorgeous fall day. When woke up this morning I asked him what he wanted to do. He said clean his car, mow the lawn, laundry. I said I wanted to go to the park n asked him if he wanted to go. He said no. ( I actually expected this answer because anytime I want to do something, he's busy. But if his FRIENDS wantto do something - he has all the time in the world. This is whatis really bothering me because it's a pattern and been like this for a long time. This is why I haven't made wedding plans yet.) Anyhow, I went for a walk and decided it was gorgeous out and wanted to go for a bike ride, came home, and his friend asked him to go mountian bike riding and he said yes to them! I was furious. I called him and asked him if he would meet me at the park at3:30. Well 3:30 came around he called n said his OLD FRIEND is in town and blocking his car. I said "whos more import? Tell him to move his car"N he hung up on me. Should he ditch me for friend or kept plans with me?

2007-10-21 08:56:36 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-10-21 08:46:02 · 31 answers · asked by Red 2

2007-10-21 08:37:53 · 50 answers · asked by Scorpio 1

2007-10-21 07:53:41 · 7 answers · asked by kera 2

I know for fact my husband loves me & we still love each other's company since we've been married 8 years now. The concern is past these 8 years, he works on and off; he is now 33 years old and has been sitting at home for almost about 6 months each year. During his unemployment time I am expected to pay all his bills, gas & food. I`m 32 years old; very insecure about my future; I cannot think of having a baby until my husband works seriously. I work very hard & stretch myself to pay mortgage bills & to run both our lives. I`m now stressed out...nothing has changed in 8 years with this man? What should I do...he keeps asking for more time. Shall I give him another year? or should I give up? Please advise!

2007-10-21 07:42:39 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous