i am a newly wed....and guess what? i have absolutely no desire to have sex.
you can imagine the stress that is already adding to the relationship.
he and i were sexually active at the start of our relationship- then realizing that we wanted to base our relationship on other things- not that- and put The Lord first- we stopped.
so, for a year we went without major contact.
i am not sure if this is all a mental block that i have created- bc i wanted to do the right thing or if something is really wrong with me.
can anyone relate? any suggestions?????
4 weeks of marriage- sex 3 times.
not happy.
2007-10-21 10:25:32 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
For more advice i would go to the song zombie by the cranberries.... yes i have had this stupid song stuck in my head ...
Just remember its in your head , in your head
zombie , zombie zombie
2007-10-21 10:30:49 · answer #1 · answered by phillip 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
you need to go to a sex therapists. there are also several medical reasons why you may not have a drive - like medication, etc. Nothing is wrong with you, in fact, because you recognize there is a problem, you will probably be able to resolve it. By the way, having sex three times in four weeks isn't bad. I admit, newly weds usually have sex more, but the real issue is why you have no desire. There are probably medications or exercises you or your husband can do to boost your desire. It will take the work of both of you, so you both have to recognize the problem and be willing to fix it.
2007-10-21 10:39:00 · answer #2 · answered by nikkiponders 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I cannot relate at all... not to be rude, but, I believe in a loving, caring, understanding, and tolerant God that gave me and my husband a body that we may use not just to eat and s.h.i.t., but also to enjoy sex and pleasure. Sex is an important part of a relationship between two people, just as sharing a congruent set of values and principles is. The number of times you two have sex doesn't matter as long as that makes you happy. I need sex -amongst other things- to have a smile on my face and I know God wants me to lead a happy, healthy, and fulfilled life, so I've never felt guilty about it. I don't think He minds me having as much hot -and kinky- sex as I can get, as long as it is with my husband.
2007-10-21 11:02:13 · answer #3 · answered by MiaMonique 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may be a block or maybe you just have to start having sex..the more you do the more you'll want if love making is right. Loss of libido can be your thyroid also. Are you fatigued, hurting loss of emotions, weight gain/loss. If so it could very well be the thyroid. I was like you and found out that I have Hashimoto thyroiditis and since starting meds 3 mo.ago my sex drive is increasing.
2007-10-21 11:26:14 · answer #4 · answered by angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can relate; That is all I am saying. I think you need to see a Dr. as I should. I am older than you, my reason is not religous,
I Don't know why!! I just know that I am interested, but, my body doesn't ever go there, if you know what I mean.Psychological? I don't know, but we should find out.
I love my man, and he could have it 3-4 times a day, but I ; excuse me, my body , could care less, and doesn't need it but maybe once a mo. I am troubled by this also, so I will read your answers and hopefully figure out why I am never horny or whatever!! Sorry, being truthful!!
2007-10-21 10:34:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It kinda does sound like a mental block. Talk to your hubby about your feelings. Remember the lord is ok with you two making love, you're married. Maybe if you will take it slow, enjoy the subtle feelings you have when your husband touches you, you might feel a little "hotter". Best of luck.
2007-10-21 10:29:50 · answer #6 · answered by ♥dealt with love♥ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your drive or lack there of can be caused by many different things such as stress, diet, weight. Those are just a few things. My best advice would be to see your doctor and be totally honest. It may be a hormonal thing. I have very little sex drive but if my hubby does the right things...I can get in the mood. Good luck!!
2007-10-21 10:31:34 · answer #7 · answered by nina 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well.....let me ask you....when was the last time you were "in the mood" to do the dishes?
But you do the dishes, don't you?
Or when was the last time you were "in the mood" to do the laundry?
But you DO have clean clothes, right?
Funny how we as women often do what we don't like doing, for the sake of keeping our homes clean, but we aren't willing to step out of our "comfort" zone and have WILLING and even EAGER sex with our men when that will keep our man happy and satisfied.....
You may wish to get some medical help, but in the meantime, why is it exactly that you don't have sex if you know sex is very important to men?
2007-10-21 10:32:34 · answer #8 · answered by lady_phoenix39 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
it is okay that you guys chose to focus on the Lord within your marriage and life together, but you are 'Married' now, and can loosen up a bit, God honors sex within the married bed, so you need to understand this, and it's importance. Now not having much of a sex drive at 32 , is actually kinda normal, so it sounds like you need to relax a bit and not be so uptight
2007-10-21 10:41:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is perfectly OK.............No for real you are doomed husband is probably at truck stops doing the Senator from Idaho dance and dosent care about the home front but it looks good to have a wife to dispel rumors.
2007-10-21 13:59:29 · answer #10 · answered by Duke 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Talk to you your gyn and see if your hormone levels are normal.
Also, PRAYER is the best solution to EVERY PROBLEM. You have a union that has been blessed by God. He would not want to see your marriage fail.
2007-10-21 10:39:13 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋