Last night, my bf and I went to a law school dance. We ended up fighting, and we'd both had a few drinks. The fighting turned into us screaming at each other outside the dorm. A resident called campus police, and we were separated for the night. It was a really stupid incident. Anyway, this morning, I went to talk to my bf, and he said that he loves me, I'm the woman of his dreams, and that he thinks I'm awesome, but he can't handle being in a relationship which resulted in the cops having to come.
I am dying inside right now. I was convinced I wanted to marry this guy. We've been dating for a year and 3 months, and we broke up once in the past (another late-night fight). But, most things are great in our relationship. I feel lost right now, and I just want to know what you think he'll do (i.e. take me back), and what I can do to reconcile this.
Thank you so much.
2007-10-21
11:51:11
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10 answers
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asked by
skichamonix515
3
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Marriage & Divorce
truthfully , lose the alchohol. thats what happened to me and my now husband. we had really bad fights, they were only after we had been drinking. if everything else is wonderful, sometimes its just best to leave the drink out of it, or cut WAY down. my husband had been in a bad relationship before i came along, his dad had past, things that he just harbored in his heart and only let them out (in a pissy way) after a night of drinking. we started spending more time together and spent nights talking and playing board games, poker, etc. kinda took ourselves out of the night scene for a while. of course i did this all without him knowing what i was thinking, he got upset to think he had a drinking problem (and no, i am not saying that you guys do... just one perspective). just sit down and think what is going on.. if you can talk with him about it. you can still go out and have fun. just make sure that you arent tired from the week, upset about things. try to alleviate all of this before you go out. m aybe that will help. GL (another thing is i knew i was gonna marry this guy, i did and have 2 wonderful kids too. still together, and still dont drink too much together)
2007-10-21 12:01:53
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answer #1
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answered by peanutran 2
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First you didnt say who actually started the fight and second, why has the fight become your fault as he is implying. You two need to quit the drinking for awhile and see what happens. I know from experience with dealing with people that words come cheap especially from guys but I sense there is more wrong here than we are seeing. It seems the fight would be half his fault regardless who started it and you had no control over calling the campus police but to say he cant be in a relationship where the police are called tells me he really doesnt feel the way he says about you or he has some kind of police record trailing him, but only you canfigure that one out. Be careful here with him before you get hurt
2007-10-21 12:04:47
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answer #2
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answered by Arthur W 7
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I think that since both of you were drinking that it would be a good indicator that neither one of you is a happy drunk. Some people become morose and combative when they drink and that is just part of their bodies reaction to alcohol. If you both agree that drinking is not something that you are going to do anymore then you can probably keep it together, however I think there is more to it than that from what you have said.
It sounds like your boyfriend is looking at this from an eye to his future and the kind of lady he wants to be with as far as his future in a law firm. Drunken brawls are looked upon very unkindly in even the most liberal law firm. He may have decided that you are too much of a liability .
2007-10-21 12:12:44
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answer #3
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answered by Mama Mia 7
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Hello , this is Onist. If you want to save this relationship you both need to read love is shared agony at www.onistsense.com.
Here you will see how going through problems is the foundation for true love. Also, how not to run from problems but confront, evaluate and cope.
I promise you'll find the answers your looking for, just make sure he reads it also. It's under the category of Onist Love.'
Good Luck!!!!!!! Let me know how it goes.
2007-10-21 12:03:06
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answer #4
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answered by onist 2
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Go talk to him again and apologize for the argument last night. Tell him you both had a few too many drinks and just took it too far and then tell him how you feel. After that, just hope he accepts your apology.
2007-10-21 11:55:50
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answer #5
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answered by Madison 6
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If he really loved you then he could handle being in a relationship. It sounds like he is trying to break up with you.
2007-10-21 12:00:05
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answer #6
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answered by Anonymous
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Ask him nicely to take you back and he will Don't go to so many parties so there will be no "late night fights"
2007-10-21 11:55:32
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answer #7
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answered by ipod 3
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he has taken u back b4 over a conflict like this before maybe he will again. also maybe u 2 should stop getting drunk together if its gna lead to fighting
2007-10-21 11:55:17
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answer #8
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answered by Ana B 2
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Just give it time,,,he will start to really miss you and want you back.
2007-10-21 11:56:21
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answer #9
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answered by crasher 3
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Counseling for both of you and no more drinking :)
2007-10-21 11:55:42
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answer #10
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answered by that judi 6
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