Marriage & Divorce - 20 August 2007

I know this is a provocative question, and it isn't going to happen any time soon, but I have a very strong feeling that if I get married in the future, I will expect my wife to change her surname to mine at marriage. I probably shouldn't be worried about this since it's hypothetical but when I tell people this often they are horrified and it makes me wonder whether it might end up being a sore point with a future partner.

I very strongly feel that the tradition where a woman takes her husband's name is a beautiful tradition and I would feel really uncomfortable if I was married to someone who kept her birth name. I'm not really old-fashioned but just don't see why it is a patriarchal practice: after all, ususally a woman's maiden name is her father's. It makes it easier for potential children and it also sends a clear signal to the world that you are married. Do you think it would be reasonable to expect that someone I married would take my name?

2007-08-20 23:45:30 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-08-20 23:29:00 · 10 answers · asked by Khaled 4mme22 2

Since I've been pregnant, sex seems like some forbidden fantasy to me. I ask to have sex all the time and he'll just change the subject or act like he's busy. When I'm not pregnant we do it all the time. I think he's just unattracted to my bubble body even though he says he's not.

2007-08-20 23:28:08 · 38 answers · asked by keri_ricker 2

you break up with someone... its actually your move..

youre fed up with the way they treat you. talk to you, etc, and finally enough is enough, cos the good doesnt out-weigh the feeling of (OH SH1t)

you still like them, for lots of reasons and are not capable of HATE so cant be too nasty, distant, still care for their feelings even.. but you need to move on and put yourself first for a change...

when is enough, ENOUGH....

say good bye to mr niceguy !! ?? when

2007-08-20 23:15:15 · 23 answers · asked by Maximus_Decimus_Meridius 4

my ex... is being dificult....
we have a buyer - she is dragging out the sale by not agreeig a date for completion which seems to mean that we cant exchange.

what can i do ?

its a big mortgage that we have to pay, i am paying 3/4 and we split up 15 months ago...

Ahhh... please help !

2007-08-20 23:12:45 · 13 answers · asked by Maximus_Decimus_Meridius 4

pls help me, i want to change my daughters surname to be followed to his biological father's surname, what are things do i need to undergo or need to prepare? Is that possible also if we don't want to get married as of now?

2007-08-20 22:28:53 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband comes from a long line of cheater from his mother side of the family! 5 generation to be exact that he knows of Great Gr.grandmother, Great grandmother, Grandmother, his mother, his AUNTS on mother side and his 2 sisters, all have or are cheating on their husbands!

This traumatized my husband SEVERALLY. I was his older sisters best friend growing up and knew family quite well.

During my Divorce I had a problem with my ex. who threaten me an abused me, when my current husband saw me get hit he went to work on the X sent him to hospital!

Our marriage of 10+ years has in fact been a happy one I'm even more in love with my husband today then I was when we first got married, he's been their for me everyday of our marriage helping me out !

My husband has gotten help for his HATRED of CHEATERS who he calls BOTTOM FEEDERS we work on the trust exercises almost everyday together and it help him tremendously and I must also claim improvement in my trust for him & love!

2007-08-20 21:45:38 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

This probably seems ridiculous to some of you but would it offend any other women if your husband wore a t shirt with a drawing of a woman in a bikini on it? My husband was on a trip and someone was selling t shirts for peanuts so he bought a couple.

2007-08-20 21:01:52 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

Religious beliefs aside---I've been married/together with the same person for almost 20 years. I am still young (36) and attractive, and find myself very attracted to someone and almost obsessing. I do not want a "relationship" with this person, other than the friendship we already have. I would just like to have sex/make-out sessions with him. I have only ever had 2 sexual partners in my whole life. I kind of feel like I missed out on a few things in my younger years, and so want to sow a few wild oats. Obviously, I don't want to hurt my husband, and don't want to completely end that relationship just so I can have-a-go with some other guy. Would appreciate feedback from people who've gone through/are going through similar feelings---not just people who will tell me I'm evil and wrong. Let's just assume that 5000 people already told me that I'm evil and wrong, and that all the religious platitudes (which I don't agree with) have already been flung at me. Other opinions?

2007-08-20 21:00:43 · 36 answers · asked by P-nuts and Hair-dos 7

2007-08-20 20:12:38 · 37 answers · asked by marincaligirl 3

My husband and I just filed Chap. 7, eliminating all bills. He said to me "I need to get a job, so he can get his 745" I said, did you not learn from the last 10 yrs, bills are debt, so don't create them. My motto is cash everything out. My truck is cash out, my ins is paid up for 12 mos. I hate bills and paying finance charges. He said he like nice things and he can't afford to cash out $130K, but he can afford to pay $700. It's like out of the frying pan and into the fire. What should I do??

2007-08-20 20:07:10 · 4 answers · asked by sassy lady 4

my husband is always itching down there and whenever we have sex he has to go to bathroom to clean his thing or else he gets these pimples he is not circumsized. so its lil red dots on his dik. is it normal or a sexual disease he has.i am clean i dun get things like that so why is he always getting that?
any info mite help

2007-08-20 19:49:29 · 14 answers · asked by baby doll 1

Two years ago my family and I were in a bad car accident. We lost our son. My husband had critical injuries and my other two daughters were injured but recovered. Because of that my husband was medically discharged from the military. We lost everything our income place to live etc. My husband now works but with medical ins. and other bills we never had to worry about before because we were in base housing. That leaves little left after the bills. I want to work but after loosing our son we both thought it would be better for our daughters if I stayed home with them. Thats fine but we need the extra money. So I am looking for an online job. I don't want to sell or get into the metabolife or any of that. So if anyone knows of a actual job that can be done on line and you get a paycheck please tell me. I don't mind working hard for things. I can work it's just finding a job that isn't a scam. Thanks so much

2007-08-20 19:37:56 · 5 answers · asked by luve 1

2007-08-20 19:25:06 · 85 answers · asked by evildevin 1

a few weeks ago I felt alot of pain when i went to the toilet but it soon went away. my wife has just started to complain of serious pain when she goes to the toilet. i dont want her to know i was with a prostitute. what can i do??????

2007-08-20 19:21:19 · 26 answers · asked by jazzman 1

We've been married two years. My day always gets started off on a bad note because she is constantly running 15-20 minutes late for work and I have to fight w/ her every day to get her out the door. We are not in a financial position to have our income interrupted by even temporary unemployment.

Also, she has really let herself go physically. I understand Mother Nature takes away outer beauty over time, but it's really like she decided I was stuck with her and just stopped taking care of herself. When her face breaks out, she messes with it until she has a half-dozen scabs that make-up doesn't cover and I told her it's disgusting but she won't stop, even when I threatened to take her cosmetics out of our budget.

I told her six months ago that I was fed up and a month later I gave her an ultimatum. She didn't change so I told her I may be leaving. She begged me to stay and I did, then I warned her again last week and no change.

What should I do?

2007-08-20 19:18:53 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous

I have a friend who lives under the control of a crazy *** mother. For 17 yrs we cannot visit or talk on the phone without her eavesdropping and controlling the conversation. I don't talk to him, I end up talking to her through him. Neither have any friends of social life. They have both been scamming disability SSI for over 7 yrs.
I am not this type of person and I have worked since I was 14,I am 36 and happy. Once in a while I will get sick of his paranoid crap and hang up.
My question is; How do I tell him in a polite way that I am not interested in his crazy ways of thinking. He is 38 and has become quite a Narcissist and quite verbally abusive. Any suggestions will be appreciated.Thank you.

2007-08-20 19:18:39 · 7 answers · asked by jerryboy47807 2

my friend got married six years ago.they have a son (6 yrs) within the first year of her life she suspected her husband flirting with girls.but could not prove it because of no solid evidence.they had serious fight on it.. it went to the extent of my friend trying to commit suicide.later he was alright for few years .he always says that he is not guilty.
But now again she found her husband having another girlfriend in a different city.she now has got solid evidence of their frequent sms & emails with her.he goes to visit her during weekends saying that he has some bussiness purpose for his visit.
but she is afraid to talk to him about it becos she feels that he might go away from her once for all.
she loves hom a lot & doesnt want lose him.at the same time she wants her husband to be faithful to her.she crying ...she is in a very bad shape what should i advise her .
what is idea behind that man's brain.will he ditch my friend.or he will stay with her.why is he playing a double game

2007-08-20 19:16:59 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-08-20 19:05:24 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

the main reason perhaps was i met my old college friend and realised we had so many things in common, and that there's so much more to know about life. i now have intention to leave my husband but certainly not for this old friend. i just feel i can't go on in my marriage when i don't feel anymore love for him and that our interests and needs have changed. we don't talk anymore as we don't share anything in common. i was a traditional wife and felt trapped and unappreciated. (thank God i realised it but only after 22 years). i feel happiest when i am with my four children.

2007-08-20 18:59:26 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous

while working I just happen to notice my friends wife starring at me in disapproval look or something. The only thing I could think why she would star at me with dissapproval my blouse was pulled down low showed a little of my clevage I did not know this until I looked down. I did straighten the blouse up. All this is going on I see her husband talking to someone I continue to do my job, this was at work by the way. I know her husband use to have a crush on me. Later on I caught her looking at me and she gave me a big smile. I was dressed in a Dark color outfit and her her husband was dressed in a same color dark suit it seem like Our outfit go to together. What is really going on?

2007-08-20 18:58:42 · 21 answers · asked by curious 2

2007-08-20 18:42:39 · 24 answers · asked by Sweatburn 1

I have been married for 7 yrs; 3 children; The last 5 yrs, I was the bread winner. Yr 6, when I was pregnant w/our last child, I went into pre-term labor at 6 mos. I knew then that I was stressed out. Doing too much, everything that I do now (stay at home mome) plus work 45 hrs per wk. So I decided to work from home, start my own business, eliminate day care, and raise my babies. I did make a really good profit, more than my 9-5! Yr 7 (last yr), was the roughest ever, yet I still managed to pull thru. Now business is slower than before, I still manage to bring in money; day care is still an issue $$, my husband is pressuring me everyday to get another job. He over look, I run a business at home & see after 3 kids (10, 5, & 2). (I'm working right now) All he sees is me at home. He is looking at paying bills & saving a little. I am looking at eliminating bills & saving alot. I told him, God wants me home with the kids, he said, I am not being logical, & using God as an excuse.

2007-08-20 18:35:25 · 12 answers · asked by sassy lady 4

I'm 24 and I know that I need to keep my mouth shut but I've had it. She's a heavy drinker and everyone in this small town of mine is asking me about my mom. My dad knows about the guy but expects "God" To tell him what to do... Well it's been 9 years now and he's still putting up with it. He's too nice and too scared of her to say it's over. Now I think it's done (the marriage) and now I regret ever telling him everything. Although, life without her would be better for him. She's torn this family apart and she's probably one of the meanest people you'll ever meet. I think she's disowned (sp?) me for good. Again, he already knows about this guy but I told him that we are all embarrased of her and her drinking/ cheating. He agreed. But was I wrong to say all that? He's the nicest man in the world. I just couldnt sit there and watch anymore...

2007-08-20 18:25:57 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

You are sitting down watching T.V. when you see a disgusting bug crawling across your floor. You get up to smush it and notice it is your abusive ex. Only really tiny. What would you say and do????

2007-08-20 18:24:58 · 23 answers · asked by Linda 1

I think FAR too many men are getting hit and DO NOT press charges or hit back BECAUSE....

1) HE WILL BE SEEN AS A WIFE BEATER AND A COWARD IF HE SO MUCH AS LIFTS A FINGER

2) WILL BE SEEN BY ALL AS A WIMP WHO GOT HIS AZZ KICKED BY A WOMAN

IT IS NOT OK FOR A MAN TO HIT A WOMAN AND I AM NOT CONDONING THAT..SO DON'T GO THERE THINKING THAT I AM - NOTHING COULD BE FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH.

IT IS EQUALLY NOT OK FOR A WOMAN TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE SITUATION AND TO HIT A MAN BECAUSE OF THE FACT THAT HE CANNOT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT!!!

INTERESTING THOUGH...SOME WOMEN DO HIT THEIR MEN BECAUSE OF THAT VERY FACT...THEY GET THAT JERRY SPRINGER CRAP IN THAT SKULL OF THEIRS AND ALL OF A SUDDEN HE IS CAUGHT DEFENDING HIMSELF AND CANNOT DO A THING-IF HE DOES...THEN IT IS THE MAN NOT THE WOMAN WHO GOES TO JAIL ON A MISDEMEANOR 3RD DEGREE ASSAULT CHARGE....VERY NICE...THIS IS THE COUNTRY WE LIVE IN...

2007-08-20 18:09:55 · 2 answers · asked by juanes addicion 6

I did not cheat on my husband, but he believes that I did and would like to file citing those grounds. I am now in a very serious relationship with someone new and want to be divorced immediately (we have to be apart a year to file here) and am considering letting him file using those grounds, since technically i'm cheating now since we are still legally married. My question is what difference does this make? How will it affect me in the future? I truly do NOT want to wait a whole year (and then some) to be divorced from this man. Please help!

2007-08-20 17:59:50 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

ok whats the big deal on not having sex b4 marriage i mean the only difference is a signed peice of paper just like un married people break up married people can get a divorce...same thing ya i know theres the risk of pregnancy but those are all the cons i can think of

2007-08-20 17:56:41 · 12 answers · asked by hers heys!!! 2

Okay, so I have a good friend, who is in a horrible marriage. He has two kids and for now a wife. Before anyone decides to think I am messing with him, I am not. I have a boyfriend, we are just good friends. He has talked to me about everything for the past 6 months. Telling me how miserable he is and how horribly his wife treats him. All they do is argue. I told him first to get counseling and he wouldn't go for that. So he decided next time he went back he was getting a divorce (he works out of town). So he went back, with divorce papers in hand. He got there and she pulled the super sweet crap on him all over again. (This is about the 7th time this has happened.) While he is away she yells at him constantly and fools around on him. I just don't understand why he keeps falling for her crap. I know there is nothin I can do except be a good friend, but my question is why does he keep going back to her after all the crap she puts him through?

2007-08-20 17:50:21 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

I have been told I am very negative I just thought I was realistic, I always think of 'if we get divorced' scenarios. My parents are divorced and have been for a long time, I don't know many people who haven't been divorced. My husband is from a different cultural background and there is only one divorce in his huge family so he thinks I am being a total downer when I think that I can't predict how I will feel about him in 15 years. Do you believe in marriage????

2007-08-20 17:48:14 · 53 answers · asked by SmEllY! 6