Marriage & Divorce - 15 May 2007

But he doesn't make my heart skip a beat. Because of my past a lot of people would not want to be with me. He doesn't care about my past because he was in a similar situation.
Without him I feel terrible. With him I just feel okay....I haven't felt happy for years...I feel like he has given me the keys out of a torture chamber...my life was the pits before I had him.
But I just don't have the excitement with him that I have had with others.
We can help each other. He wants me to marry him.
What should I do?

2007-05-15 08:43:36 · 28 answers · asked by Sally 1

My husband and I have been having some serious problems these past few months and I have been considering getting a divorce. We have a 2 year old daughter together. The problem is that my husband keeps threatening to have a private investigator watching me at all times after we divorce and to take my daughter away from me the moment that he catches me or hears that i have had another guy around our daughter. He has basically said that I either have to stay with him or live by myself until our daughter turns 18. Can he do that? He also says that I'd be lucky to get joint custody because he says that i have cheated and the thing is that i havent cheated on him and he has no proof that i have other than what his family has told him (they are more or less out to get me too). I live in Tennessee and have been told by close friends that tennessee is a "mother's" state. What do I do? What can I do? What kind of life and relationships am i allowed to have after divorce with a child? Help!!

2007-05-15 08:34:59 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband had an afffair, and his lover told me she wasnt the first. I actually believe her, long story why i do, but i do. And I'm pretty sure she wont be the last. Do any women face this fact about their husband and just over look it and succumb to this kind of marriage? Just because he's otherwise a "good husband" good father, just over all other wise a "good person". sometimes I think of leaving, but do i want to really start over? I just wonder if any other women just accept it and stay in the marriage? BTW, we have 12 years together and 2 kids...8 and 10. And if so, how is life working out for you?

2007-05-15 08:22:13 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous

on custudy after he was incarcerated for a non violent crime for 14 months and he is backhome. He has primary residential parenting time joing custody for 60 % and nothing legally was done while incarceterated.

2007-05-15 08:19:38 · 8 answers · asked by kas72 1

when I saw my wife I was told she was Graduate, religious & found of cooking. I told her that since it was beging of my carrier she will hav to strugle a lot & wud hav to all house hold work. We got married. I came to Kno that my she is not even 10th, & was not in habbit of doing anywork, her language was rough ans she not at all clean. She made me quarrel with my brother. At every step my mom in laws chaeted me, yet they never left a chance to humilate me. And when they could do any thing they fabricted false evidence to invole me in a rape case. but soon my loclitry people came to kno the truth and they asked me to leave my wife, but I thought of my daughter and all harrasment my family wouls suffer I chose to stay with her. my in laws dont feel ashamed of what they did. still they try to act bully, & my wife at hearts is always with them.If I ask why they did so my wife says I dont hav the right to ask. Im forced to leave my parental house due to my wife and pay huge rent Wat 2 do

2007-05-15 08:16:12 · 14 answers · asked by annjee 4

This makes me feel like trash. He's always gone til late. Last night he stayed out til 2:30am "fixing a sewer blockage" (he works for a utility company). I've caught him in lies before of small things he thought I'd get pissed off about like going out and drinking and such. So I don't know when to beleive him. Maybe I'm just paranoid and just don't want it to end. It would be better if he would just tell me the truth and not lie but aside from all that. When he's home, he always seems like he's wanting to be elsewhere. We have a baby to think about too. I really love him and want things to work out but it seems like I'm hitting a brick wall with him emotionally. He has all these friends that are girls and has thier numbers in his phone. I don't mind him having girl "friends" but having their phone #s to me is just taking it to that next level. I just want to be a family and don't want a divorce. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I'm at my witts end.

2007-05-15 08:14:19 · 22 answers · asked by Lucky 2

Im recently divorced and have two small kids and of course I fell into a pit of debt to keep a roof over my kids heads after my husband left. I sold my home but I cant get beyond the small loans I took out to stay afloat right after my divorce. I have a steady job, but my credit is ruined and I cant get out of this debt hell? Can Anyone give me advice or know anyone who gives personal loans for bad credit.

2007-05-15 08:13:33 · 16 answers · asked by Anna 2

My bf is scared senseless of sex. even if a condom is used he's still scared. He therefore insists that we do it over the phone. and my problem is I HATE IT. I hate lying there on my own trying to give myself sexual pleasure. And when i tell him, he says i should still do it. I've tried it several times and most of the time I fake it. I even hate the faking. when i complain, he gets so angry and brings up all sorts of horrid things from the past and he just doesn't stop. It's either his way or no way. What can I say to him that will make him sympathize with me a little. I truly HATE it.

2007-05-15 08:12:14 · 34 answers · asked by fanciful me 2

ok my husband had this freind and (she was a striper) well she would spend the night in our spare bed room, and i kindof was freinds with her ( you know keep your enemy's closer.) well she started dating one of my best guy freinds and my husband got all jelous and didnt want to be freinds with them anymore and i mean he freeked out. well then she desides to come clean and tell me and everyone else that she was having a affair with my husband and they sept with eachother in my bed and when i was at work in her car. i mean there were signs there but i just dont know what to do. we have a kid togeather and we are just starting to get back on track because he did this to me before when i first had my son.
I dont know why I didnt leave him then

2007-05-15 08:07:47 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous

Background:

I work full time, sometimes almost 50 hours a week, in a stressful job at a stressful workplace where I am responsible for directly managing a staff of 35 and doing administration/payroll for a staff of over 100 people. I also deal with customers directly in a customer service role.

I am married to a man of well off parents who was raised by nannies and housekeepers.

He has been purposely unemployed for more almost 8 months.

My husband doesn't do anything around the house, other than play video games and surf the internet.

My husband has been chronically and clinically depressed for most of his life, has never really gone for therapy, and he is very immature for a man of 45.

I come home and the house is a mess, nothing gets done unless I do it, I have to ask him repeatedly to help out with even the smallest of tasks, and I feel like I have a child at home instead of a husband.

I love my job and my co-workers...and am starting to not love my husband because I don't feel like he cares that I feel like I have 2 full time jobs.

I am tired most of the time, am starting to hate coming home, feel like he's taking me down with him, and just want to leave...everything...including my job...which I love.

Question:

How can I communicate to my husband that he needs to do his part in our home so that I don't feel like I am over-worked, over-stressed, under appreciated and wanting to leave?

TIA

2007-05-15 08:02:15 · 54 answers · asked by thecanmorechick 2

she wouldn't say who it was. She wanted to talk to my husband. Do you think it could be a mistress.

2007-05-15 07:52:40 · 19 answers · asked by madeline r 1

he is over 50's, not married, live alone, and had a job that earns more than $7000 amonth.. his oly excuse is that he has debts that deduct 50% of his monthly income.

2007-05-15 07:51:31 · 2 answers · asked by ghadeee 1

My 30 year old fiance works with a friendly, flirty-type 23 yr old. I found text messages on his phone telling her he would like to spoil her and they could have any kind of relationship she wants. She rejected him because she has a boyfriend and knew about me. My fiance told her how lucky her bf was and that he was looking for a better gf. He told me it was never going to go anywhere, he was seeing if he was still attractive to younger women. He had a hard time with turning 30. This hurts me even more because I am 8 yrs older. He has apologized. Do you think this would have went further if the girl had said yes?

2007-05-15 07:50:08 · 20 answers · asked by Tyra99 2

My husband n I have divorced and then gotten back together, 3 kids, I came back cause things were supose to be different he even acted differently, I almost left again fell for it again, Dec. he had a heart attack so, I didn't leave, then possible lung cancer. I am feeling num. Jan. another situation where he didn't defend me history of it plus more, I am not perfect by no means. He seems more humble. He can tell I am num and distant n thats usually when he becomes this way. I am not saying hes a bad person but I'v just been hurt so many times by him, roller coaster ride for us both.I stopped lashing out several years ago. I feel tired and very num, and broken. The last thing we went through n his reaction I couldn't believe it.H eended up pushing I understand he was angry. He had never pushed me before, Just be little, reject, heart pain. Is it possible to go forward?

hurt n confused,
~ Angel ~

2007-05-15 07:48:04 · 4 answers · asked by ~Angel~ 3

Ive been w/him for 17 years and have never really had a drive for it but over the last few years I have just been repulsed by the thought of his stubby little hands on my body. I try to creep into my bed without making a sound but he can be snoring and still hear me and wake right up. We've tried EVERYTHING. what should I do?

2007-05-15 07:45:49 · 32 answers · asked by Diana A 3

2007-05-15 07:38:36 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

I'm only 19 and will be 20 in october.
My boyfriend recently asked me to marry him in december but ever since then I have been having problems with my family.

They all tell me that I'm too young and that I'm screwing up my life and that I need to worry about other things then starting my family this young.
I really dont know what to do, I love him with all my heart ans have never been happier.
Should I just let then know that I'm not letting him go and that this is my life not theres.
I want my family in my life but dont want them to hold a grudge against me.

2007-05-15 07:25:20 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous

Religious - Is it a sin for a unmarried Christian man (who can't have sex if he's not married) is it a sin for him to watch porn? My husband got married at 28 years old...I was kind of naive to think that he was pure, although he says he was a virgin, now I'm sure he couldn't, for health reasons, stay away from some kind of mast**** and thus, from porn. Now that I'm married I found out he's into porn by doing a simple search on his computer. I've tried talking to him but it doesnt help...he doesnt act sorry or anything like that, in fact he only gets very irritated. But my question remains what does God allow a man do to stay healthy if he can't have sex? B/c I know that porn is a huge sin and it really devastates me

2007-05-15 07:13:07 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous

It is like, everytime, after our fighting, he would apologize very fast.
Sometimes, he made me cry by some stupid jokes, and as soon as he saw my tears, he apologized.

Did he mean it? or he just wanted to comfort me?

I need some opinion from mature people, thanks.

2007-05-15 07:09:21 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

my husband is always very curious about me, he always ask me, like when i come bac from my job, he would say what i have been doing, to whom i were talking, as im a teacher. i don't know what he mean asking about that, sometimes i just talk with my collegues.

we have been married for 2 yrs & he don't let me go anywhere, alone even if it's shopping he would come with me, i don't kno what that means, he don't let me talk with his parents or any family member like my sister-in-law or brother-in-law, he just say to me that he know them very well, so it would be good for me if i don't talk with them..
Anyhow he do job as well, he remains very busy, but he would never forget to ask me what i have been doing all day...!!! he says that he cares alot about me that's y he is curious.
anyhow whenever i ask him to go out together to eat or watch movie, he always agree with me.
But if i would forget to tell him something, than he would go crazy, and would keep on saying why didn't i told him.

2007-05-15 07:01:54 · 30 answers · asked by Priti 1

my husdand birthday is dis friday, i want to do sum thing nice for him. It seems as if we have been to just about all of the restuants in town, i want to take him some where different. Maybe to get a massage or sum thing (but where?) im lost and time seems to be speeding up lol

HELP

wife of a wonderful husband

oh we live in los angeles

2007-05-15 06:58:52 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

I just found out that my husband actively pursued a relationship with another woman, a friend in fact, 3 months prior to our getting married. My initial reaction was to be angry with both of them until I found out that she rejected him because she was my friend. The fact still remains that she let me marry him knowing he didn't love me. What's even sadder is that all of our friends knew. Everyone knew but me. While I love him dearly, there is no way I could possibly stay with him. He's taken all the joy I had.

2007-05-15 06:51:28 · 19 answers · asked by kriskabob 3

Hi. My husband and I have a 7 year old son. We've been together for over 8 years, but we never married. We are both working. Lately, my man's second cousin came to our town. She is a single mother, in her late 40's, left her children in other state. My husband has many rental properties and he offered her a apartment for free. He also shopped for groceries, took her out for dinners, brought lunches to her work, gave her money, paid for her cell phone. My inlaw family and I begged her to leave us alone. She said my man loved her and they could do whatever they wanted since he never married me. My man admitted that he liked her too but when he found out that she dated her boss at the same time and kicked her boss's xgirlfriend out on the street, my man decided to leave her. He does not want to be a spared tire. She threatened to ruin my husband and my inlaw's reputaion if he left her. My son is very young, I don't want him to lose his father. What kind of cousin is she? Please help us

2007-05-15 06:48:17 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-05-15 06:43:45 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous

I don't include extremes in my conclusions, like the horrible domestic abuse men perpetrate on women or women taking houses/children away from fit husbands they're divorcing. I'm talking about the commonplace things that most people go through once or twice during their dating careers.

2007-05-15 06:39:38 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-05-15 06:36:01 · 15 answers · asked by lssc06 1

2007-05-15 06:26:47 · 18 answers · asked by lounwo30 1

I got divorced awhile back, and I left my ex-husband the house and most of our possessions. I moved into an apartment and took the kids. I got remarried about 6 months ago and moved into a new home. I just don't feel quite comfortable I feel like I live in his house with all of his things. I cant seem to call it home because I have always had a house of my own. I am also pregnant and I think this is adding to my feelings because you want to "nest" when you are having a child, but since I don't feel like this is my home, and everything in it is pretty much his, I feel very uncomfortable. He doesnt seem to think that I should feel this way and doesn't understand. I think its because he is not in my situation. Any thoughts on how to make me feel at home?

2007-05-15 06:26:07 · 18 answers · asked by amrp 1

Is it ok to just marry for money if you havent been able to find a good guy anyway?? I have dated many guys and have gotten so hurt. At this point, I feel like I will not be finding a good guy, so I might as well marry a rich man that I dont love. And if he becomes a jerk (which they all do) at least I will have somehting to fall back on. Thanks for your input.

2007-05-15 06:25:36 · 27 answers · asked by Tina 2

Here are the highlights-
I was married, divorced and remarried. Blended family...his kids call me mom because I am the only role model in their lives, my son calls my husband by his first name instead of dad. He is actively involved with his father though. My husband feels he should use Mr. with his name to show respect instead of just spouting off his name. Is this too impersonal for a child? I am torn on this.

2007-05-15 06:24:40 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous