ok my husband had this freind and (she was a striper) well she would spend the night in our spare bed room, and i kindof was freinds with her ( you know keep your enemy's closer.) well she started dating one of my best guy freinds and my husband got all jelous and didnt want to be freinds with them anymore and i mean he freeked out. well then she desides to come clean and tell me and everyone else that she was having a affair with my husband and they sept with eachother in my bed and when i was at work in her car. i mean there were signs there but i just dont know what to do. we have a kid togeather and we are just starting to get back on track because he did this to me before when i first had my son.
I dont know why I didnt leave him then
2007-05-15 08:07:47 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That is real f*ked up, i feel bad for you, i dont know how you can ever get over this, maybe counselling will help but, I say end it now and start a new chapter in your life.
2007-05-15 08:11:30 · answer #1 · answered by fws204jb 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you know what you have to do... just saying you do not know why you didn't leave him before says it all.
I have been there, when my son was 6 months old my husband cheated on me, I am not one for second chances, but I gave him one, just to have him do it again.
I filed for divorce and now 10 years later am remarried and so much happier than I ever could have imagined.
Divorce will not be easy and you will cry a lot of tears, but I would be willing to bet you are crying a lot of tears staying in an unhappy marriage anyway. You need to help create a happy healthy life for you and your child, and only you can decide to make the change.
One thing you need to always remember is it was not your fault, If he was not happy with you would he have wanted to come back after the first time? You have something great that he knew he could not live without, the problem is he can not make a commitment!
I wish you and your child all the best!
2007-05-15 08:20:29 · answer #2 · answered by MOK 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay, this is a case of bad decision making. If I had a friend that was a stripper, which I don't, and I asked my wife could she sleep in the spare room, my wife's response would be, "No". I would say the same thing if she had a friend that was a male stripper, which she does not. Him freaking out should have been your clue that the "chicken's have come home to roost". You two have to sit down and talk this out. You two have to decide if you are going to have a committed monogamous relationship or not. If you find that you can't then you two need to start thinking about other arrangements which may include divorce. Just remember the children are the most important. You both have to protect them from this kind of behavior.
2007-05-15 08:16:10 · answer #3 · answered by soulsearcherofthetruth 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What do you mean possibly cheating? Do you have to have pictures? Do you believe her? Do you believe him?
What do you mean you are getting back on track?
Did he cheat on you when you were carrying his child? He's a bum.
If he got away with it, he will do it again.
You don't have a marriage. You have a roommate, who is dating around. In your house, when you can't leave. He is a bum.
Is he devoted to you? Has he apologized for betraying you in your own bed? Is he begging for forgiveness? Are you in counselling? If the answer is "no," get out.
You didn't leave because you "didn't know what to do."
Do you now?
Just because you have a child with a bum, you don't have to raise him with one- so your husband can teach your son how to disrespect you.
Don't waste your life.
Teach your son that women are to be respected, cherished and not walked on. Start by not being a doormat.
AT the very least, go to counselling even if he won't. He should be willing, if he has a hope of repairing the damage he has done to you.
Good luck, hon.
2007-05-15 08:31:10 · answer #4 · answered by Lottie W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't advocate violence but what I would like is for someone to kick her behind for you. He is definetly the problem but as a woman, I think I would have just given you enough respect not to tell you. Dangit that was mean. Your husband? Lowlife, selfish, disrespectful hope his yang is an old brown banana from here on out never get some again butt hole. Girl, go to the doctor, she's a slut, he's a slut...your health and being able to be a mommy to your children is your first priority. Don't beat her/him down because you need to think clearly and strategically for your children's well being. Transfer the cash if you can or if you need to wait to make your move do so. Be stealth like and keep it to yourself until you're ready to make a move. He's not going to change and you don't need that. Of course if you don't mind and want to work it out...
2007-05-15 08:16:31 · answer #5 · answered by Emerald Jones 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have been hurt pretty bad. I admire your courage and your ability to try and work this out before. Keeping your enemies close is fine but it does not mean that close! What do you want? Do you think it will work? Do you think he will change? Are you willing to try again? Will you be able to trust him again? Does he want to continue with you? What are you willing to accept? Has your self esteem been damaged? Don't give too much weigh to your child, your son is not the issue. He will always have both of you. It is you and him that may not have each other. Don't do anything until your are ready, willing, and able. Then do what is best for you and your boy. Good Luck
2007-05-15 08:17:38 · answer #6 · answered by Modern Man 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm married and my wife cheated on me once. I got over it pretty easy cause I believe 9 out of 10 times it's gonna happen. Love is a beautiful thing no doubt, but that incident left a bitter taste in my mouth that comes and go. I hope you guys work out your issues. As far as my situation sometimes I feel like I was wrong for being a good-hard 2 find husband. anyway good luck.
2007-05-15 08:18:09 · answer #7 · answered by mayne 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Possibly cheating? Definitely cheating spouse....
If this issue is in the past, you might have to with until he gives you the next excuse. It seems ti be he has the habit, so he will fall again.. Are you willing to leave? then take your opportunity and leave....
Oh! and by the way! stripper + man = sex not friendship.... If he shows up at home with a prostitute or some of the kind then, be sure, he is up to something...
2007-05-15 08:17:40 · answer #8 · answered by etherberg 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
do no longer undercover agent on your companion. Ask him at present if he has any new acquaintances. do no longer accuse him of any on line relationships as a results of fact there are lots of people who've on line acquaintances. Even fortuitously married human beings. it particularly is their deepest enterprise. It basically will become a concern while they meet and characteristic lunch, pretty with the different intercourse. Do you have any male Contacts? possibly this could be considered as greater-marital on your area? the 2d distrust creeps right into a courting, is the 2d that each and everything starts off to cave in. Relationships are a 2-way street. possibly you and your husband have been drifting aside and you the two have not got lots in straightforward as you the two thought? you will be able to could desire to re-set up your courting including your companion. possibly a weekend away could be solid? the perfect thank you to quit any tom-foolery in the previous it starts off, or gets severe, is to make your companion finally end up greater exciting than different human beings.
2016-12-11 10:18:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where's the possible cheating spouse here? Sounds like a cheating spouse to me.
That you had a stripper living in your home with you is insane. A stripper is only once removed from being a prostitute.
You should leave now - this is who he is and will always be. Trust me he will not change and does not deserve another chance.
You deserve better.
2007-05-15 08:12:05 · answer #10 · answered by Ker Plunk 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, regardless of whether she's your friend or not she shouldn't be sleeping in your house under the same roof as your husband and especially int he line of work she's in. I don't care how well you can trust someone, everyone is capable fo bad things. EVERYONE. Now, I'm not saying she's telling the truth, but if your husband is showing signs and he's startign to act wierd, than perhaps it's ytime you found a better life for yourself and a better role model for your child.
2007-05-15 08:12:36 · answer #11 · answered by lauraking83 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋