Marriage & Divorce - 6 August 2007

I'm 31 and my fiance is 51. He has 2 grown children ages 27 & 29. His kids have been his life. They both work for him. He loves them very much and would do anything for them. But they hate me b/c of my age apparantly and refuse to even meet me. Neither of them came to dinner for their dad's bday b/c I was there and now that we are engaged I'm wondering if they will even come to the wedding. I don't need them to like me but it would be nice if they could respect their father by growing up a little and acting mature at family functions or holidays instead of refusing to show up at all which hurts him very much. Hopefully time will heal all of this. Who knows. I don't want to be a mom of any sort to them. The best I could hope for is to be a friend. It is hard not to get mad though. Their dad employs them, gives and gives to them and this is the way they treat him. Because I love him I hate to watch it. The rest of his family is happy for us. What should I/we do about the kids though?

2007-08-06 08:16:43 · 20 answers · asked by bnr76 1

what to look for hes using excuses saying you deserve better,ive failed,why do you put up with this,but he shows no signs of wanting to improve himself any feed back would be greatly appreciated

2007-08-06 08:12:00 · 23 answers · asked by mamaof 6 2

What is the point? He says he wants to fix it. How can you fix what has already been done? The other times we've talked, he hasn't gotten it. How can he love me and act like a complete jerk? Why does he have to know what's in my head? Why does he have to know how I feel? Vivesectionist!

2007-08-06 08:10:04 · 6 answers · asked by so tired 2

i love him very much, but we were seperated for 3 days and he got someone else pregnant.. now i really dont want to be a part of it.. i dont want to end badly though!! help!!!!

2007-08-06 07:58:03 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband is a 23 year old african american male and I am a 30 year old caucasian female. I have a master's degree & a good paying job, he has a high school diploma & makes about 1/4 of what I do. We have one child & one on the way. We have been together 5 years and married 2. My husband has cheated on me many many times. I truly love him & our child adores him. I do not have low self-esteem or think that I don't deserve better. He is mainly attracted to african american females, however he does tell me he is attracted to me as well. Due to him looking at african american females & cheating on me with them I feel as though I can't "compete" with them. He is mainly with these girls for sex & the longest he has been with one is about a month. I know that I can't "make" him stop cheating, but does anyone have any suggestions on what I can do to make him interested in me and not other females?

2007-08-06 07:54:33 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-08-06 07:52:02 · 37 answers · asked by Anonymous

I met a man who was married and I fell in love. He decided to leave his wife to be with me. After three weeks together he decided to give his marrige one last go. I left and she came back. In one week he sent her back home and wanted me back saying that he loved me and wanted to be with me. They got a divorce and we have been together for seven months. He began to suffer from bouts of depression and started drinking a lot. He was happy with me at first; and then I guess when the new wore off he sunk back into his depression. He told me he needed some time to think, so I went to stay with a friend for a few days. He then called and wanted me to come home because he missed me. I came back, but I had already planned to visit my father. So I left again to go see him. My boyfriend told me that when I got back everything was going to be OK. About 6 hours later I got a call from him saying he was going back to his wife. I'm comfused; help.

2007-08-06 07:47:51 · 15 answers · asked by candy 1

I'm 28 and she is 21, I let her go out last weekend because you know, she hasn't gone out and now we're marrie with a 2yr old girl, and I used to go out when I was her aged now I can't because of my job, and now it looks like she liked going to the bar and she wants to go out again. Is this the beginning of the end, or should I be more strict and tell her no that she's marrie and she doesn't have business anywhere else.
Worrie man.

2007-08-06 07:46:07 · 21 answers · asked by Shadow 4

I woke up this morning and my body felt like I had made love. Then I just got off the phone with my husband and he told me he did me when I was in a deep sleep. He doesn't believe that I can't remember!! I'm not mad I'm just trippin cause I had no idea till he told me. I was just wondering if this has happened to anyone else out there. Guys and Girls can both answer. Thanks!

2007-08-06 07:42:00 · 21 answers · asked by tookoolfool 4

he/she used to work at a gay striper house in las vegas for good while , not because for money it was because of plassure.

what would you say?

2007-08-06 07:35:18 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

This may sound stupid but pls understand that I am feeling a lot of pain.... When the husband cheats on you and leaves you for another woman, and when a husband leaves you because mommy is too important does it hurt the same?

Sorry, my emotional level is way of the charts and I am not thinking.... just feeling a lot of pain, betrayal. I am very very passionate and my feelings, whatever they are, are very strong

2007-08-06 07:34:08 · 15 answers · asked by Lost 1

sex when you are trying to convienve more
or is it more straight to buisness and not as passionate.
do you also feel disappointe dlike the girsl when you misse that month?

2007-08-06 07:31:19 · 10 answers · asked by girl 3

Last night my fiance and I were a buzzed after drinking a bunch of wine. We had a great weekend. Then things got wierd. He was jokingly pulling me on his lap, and I jokingly took his nose b/t my fingers and plugged it up. when I did that he got mad and in retaliation punched me on my skull - not too hard but hard enough. Long story short I threw a frisbee at him again semi-jokingly and it hit him on the face. he got really mad and got the frisbee and starting throwing it at me continuously with all his might. Then he started saying we were done. I know he didn't mean that. But I've never been in an abusive relationship and don't want to be now. Was he overreacting cuz he was drunk? Its my fault too because i have hit him on the leg once when I was mad and this started this whole wierd cycle where he hits back. Should I cancel our wedding and end it or talk to him?

2007-08-06 07:27:54 · 12 answers · asked by malibubeach 2

I have been married for 17 years. I work from home and my wife works downtown. Because I work from home, over time almost all of the household chores and maintenance have defaulted to me.

Let me explain... I spend twice as much time caring for the kids. I make the 90% of our meals, including weekends. I do 90% of the laundry, 80% of the general cleaning, and 60% of kitchen cleaning/dishes. All of the general maintenance on our house (repairs, painting, mowing, landscaping, etc) also falls on me.

She does take a lead in a few things, such as our social calendar, setting up doctors' appointments, and school issues. But that is about it.

She refuses to see the inequality or uses her job/commute or her health as an excuse. She gets defensive and I look like the bad guy. If she acknowledges the problem at all, it 'gets better' for a week or so, and then back to normal.

Any advice?

2007-08-06 07:26:23 · 9 answers · asked by Wundt 7

2007-08-06 07:23:26 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband is a serial cheater. He is 23 & I am 30. We have been together since he was 18 & I was 26 (yes I know, big mistake). I am caucasian & he is african american. He is attracted to african american females & I am the only caucasian woman he has ever been with so I feel as though I can't "compete" with the females he likes. He vows to give it up & then does it again. He often times cannot deal with the guilt he feels for doing it so then he will blame me to make himself feel better. I know that everyone will say leave him or learn to deal with it, but I believe people can change & I also believe that once you commit to someone maritally that you should stick with them. Please do not think that I am uneducated or have low self-esteem. I have a master's degree & know that I am a wonderful & beautiful person. He has a hs diploma & often remarks that he can't contribute to the family as I do. Does anyone have any suggestions on what can be done to change a serial cheater?

2007-08-06 07:21:23 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-08-06 07:16:00 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-08-06 07:08:27 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

I'm talking about some woman I dated in high school and then lived together for a few years. I dumped her because she was a loon and now she is calling me 12 years later and bitching me out! WTF!?

2007-08-06 07:03:21 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

yes/no? what races?

2007-08-06 06:42:02 · 25 answers · asked by Glitter 5

A husband , who is your lover before marriage?
A husband, who is your friend before marriage?
justify.

2007-08-06 06:36:23 · 32 answers · asked by Samar 2

This is a difficult situation. My girlfriend & I have been together 3 yrs and lived together for 2. We are married by common law and she has 2 kids from her previous marriage.So about 2 mnths ago she told me she cheated on me and wanted to move out. It was with one my close friends. I was divasted, hurt I felt betrayed. I still love her and was willing to take her back. He ended up going to jail for about 4 mnths. I was willing to let her go. She decided to stay with me and canceled the apartment. She told me she never stopped loving me and cant see herself without me in her life. So we decided go to counseling and work on our relationship and do the family thing with the kids. So we have been spending more time with the kids and have grown closer. Shes being selfish, she told me she still has feelings for him and is scared whats going to happen when he gets out. She knows she can be so happy with me and has so much to lose if we break up and wants to do the right thing. what do I do?

2007-08-06 06:34:14 · 21 answers · asked by leo_player79 1

2007-08-06 06:31:16 · 40 answers · asked by BIGTATTIE 1

I have joint custody with reasonable visitation and I pay my child support. However, my ex-wife believes that reasonable visitation is no visitation at all. My children have also moved several times in the past few years and I have been denied their whereabouts.

2007-08-06 06:22:47 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

My divorce has been complete for over a year now. My ex husband is remarried. Our property settlement was filed with the court a month ago. My exhusband is in contemp of court because he has not paid me the money he owes me. How do I get my attorney, who has a couple of high profile cases, to work on mine? I'm tired of waiting.

2007-08-06 06:08:30 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

We been together for 7 years his 4 kids have been living with us for 6 years ages now are 7-11 and iam ready to get married and he keeps putting it off what should i do?

2007-08-06 06:06:40 · 20 answers · asked by billyenair 1

I realy love my husbend what sould i do ?

2007-08-06 06:05:19 · 20 answers · asked by nessa g 1

I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year and a half now and known him roughly 2 years. Earlier this month he popped the quest on me and I said yes, being quite caught up in the moment. Now that we're engaged though, I get second thoughts. He wants to get married in December (elope) and then in June have a more formal ceremony, but I'm uneasy about this. I get a little paranoid asking myself what if i doesn't work out? And I'm not so sure I want to get married so early on, I keep telling myself to give it time and see. I keep nit-picking at him and finding all the negatives, they're vain and stupid ones (IE. I don't like the way his voice sounds, don't ask, I just don't). I don't want to get married and then be another member of the huge statistic of divorce. I always had this idea I'd only get married once. And when I kiss him, I always feel nothing, its just a kiss. Maybe the whole sparks thing is just a fairytale deal? Is it just jitters or should I figure out a way to tell him

2007-08-06 05:59:03 · 17 answers · asked by Tic-Tac 2

Me and my wife still live in the same house together but we don't sleep together any more, she's looking for some were else to live as she want to separate. She goes out in the morning and come back around 6pm, she does that 7 days a week. She's not seeing any one else, just hangs around with her friend all day drinking coffee. She treats the home like a B+B now, should I let her stay until she finds a new place or should I throw her out with all her stuff.

2007-08-06 05:55:17 · 43 answers · asked by Andy S 1

I am really having a hard time finding a reason to forgive my wife for cheating. Love and even our son doesn't seem like a good enough reason to forgive. I don't even see why I should forgive for the first offense either. Plus, we have talked about what caused the cheating and I did not do much wrong to cause the affair.

2007-08-06 05:53:24 · 25 answers · asked by Kenny F 2