What is the point? He says he wants to fix it. How can you fix what has already been done? The other times we've talked, he hasn't gotten it. How can he love me and act like a complete jerk? Why does he have to know what's in my head? Why does he have to know how I feel? Vivesectionist!
2007-08-06 08:10:04 · 6 answers · asked by so tired 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I should say, the other times in the last 10 years of marriage, he has asked me to spill my guts. I am sick of having things him do things that I have toget over. I am thinking life might be more peaceful without him.
2007-08-06 10:45:38 · update #1
Why do people want to know what anybody thinks? It's called communication. Either you aren't a good communicator (a lot of women are positively aweful and say things that even contradict themselves), or he is hoping for different answers to the same questions.
I am leaning toward "you can't communicate" because you didn't bother to tell us "what has already been done" while expecting us to answer you, so you definitely suck at communicating.
2007-08-06 09:00:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Communication is a two way street. It sounds to me like you've gotten to the point where you don't want to make the effort anymore. That's a shame, because if he's asking you to tell you what you're feeling, he still cares.
Sometimes it take multiple rounds of these discussions to get something resolved. The 1st pass is often just the venting of emotions, with the real talking getting started only after you get the venting out of the way. If you vent and walk away, then the discussion never gets to the constructive part.
Stick with it. Don't give up so easily on trying to resolve something you're having a problem with. You might want to come back a day or two after a talk and say "our talk didn't go as well as I'd hoped and we didn't really resolve anything. Let's try again". Since you've already vented, the 2nd pass will be a lot more productive.
It took me a long time to figure this out, but since my marriage has survived 25 years, I can tell you that open communication works if you have the patience to keep trying.
2007-08-06 18:42:27 · answer #2 · answered by cyclingnut86 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think this guy might be getting a lot of gratification from knowing you have intense feelings for him. Sounds like he says all the right things, just to make sure you're still into him. As hard as it may be you might want to pretend like you're over him when he's around. Don't go off on how hot other guys around you are, that wont really get to him. But little things like, not answering if he calls. Then not calling him back immediately, or sometimes not at all, then waiting for him to call you again. When he asks what you're up to or why you didn't answer tell him you've been busy and leave it at that. Eventually he will start to see that you're moving on and that will change his behavior too. Either he will let you go, or it will start to drive him crazy and he'll try to make you feel things for him again. Stay strong in front of him, don't let him see you sweat
2007-08-06 15:20:03 · answer #3 · answered by Kimi Cabanna 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Refrain from these disjointed sentences. Maybe he wants you to talk to him because he can't understand what you're babbling on about any more than I can.
Try again....and use complete sentences.
2007-08-06 15:23:51 · answer #4 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
calm down!
2007-08-06 15:16:06 · answer #5 · answered by purna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hrm ...
2007-08-06 15:14:37 · answer #6 · answered by Random_Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋