We been together for 7 years his 4 kids have been living with us for 6 years ages now are 7-11 and iam ready to get married and he keeps putting it off what should i do?
2007-08-06 06:06:40 · 20 answers · asked by billyenair 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well from experience I can answer u. I was with my husband for 8 1/2 yrs before we got married not cause of me but him. He had been married before and was a little gun shy of the whole married thing. His x cheated on him. Well he would bring it up and say that we were then wouldn't say any thing about it for awhile. I got my hopes up several times just to be droped on my face. But now we are married 2 months from our 9 th anniversary. Just be patient if hes worth the wait then you will have to till hes ready. It was truely worth my wait. The one above me says it cahnges people yep it sure did for the better. I love my David even more now than before we got married
2007-08-06 06:38:36 · answer #1 · answered by Jen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have married before the kids moved in with you. Nonetheless, 7 yrs. is way too long to be dating with no marriage in sight. It would appear he has no interest if he continues to put it off and you should find his lack of commitment and immaturity very disturbing. I'd say it's time for you to move on and find someone who really wants you.
2007-08-06 06:19:46 · answer #2 · answered by dawnb 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How important is marriage to you is the real question. You will be in a common law marriage after 8 years anyway. If that piece of paper is important, and you are ready to draw the line in the sand, then do so. And if he doesn't come thru with a date, at least you know where you are... at which point you stay under his conditions (no marriage) or you leave and find a guy willing to be your husband.... But hon, if you are good enough to raise his children, good enough to cook his food, good enough to keep his house, and good enough to share the man's bed for 7 years, hon you are good enough to be his wife. And if he doesn't agree..... sweetie, I'd be outa there in 30 minutes. 7 years is long enough, if marriage is what you want.
2007-08-06 06:20:17 · answer #3 · answered by April 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, the writing was on the wall. He started living with you about the time his youngest child was born; and his wife/other gf had given him one a year for three years before that.
What would be his reason for marrying you now? If it's too keep the "mother" of his children, that doesn't leave much for you. If he'd wanted you just for himself, the wedding would have happened 6 years ago.
2007-08-06 06:14:09 · answer #4 · answered by Sarah C 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not to be mean but you need to be prepared to cut your losses and try to find a new man. Why would he commit to marriage when he has all the benefits without the commitment? Take a hard line with this man and walk away. If he loves you enough for the next step, he will come after you with a proposal.
2007-08-06 06:16:22 · answer #5 · answered by dadof7n2001 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dump him. If he can't figure out to marry you by now than he will never figure it out.
His children are the ones I feel for. They really deserve much better than that. They won't know how men are supposed to treat women.
He really should be paying you for your services. Maids, Nanny's and Prostitutes all get paid- and you are doing it all for free.
Next time make a man respect you- don't move in or have sex until you are his wife.
2007-08-06 06:27:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he can't/won't officially and permenantly commit to you after 7 years, I think you know what you SHOULD do, the only questions is if you have the strength of will to act on that since it will be so hard (with children involved).
2007-08-06 06:09:44 · answer #7 · answered by Random_Girl 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
7 yrs and nothing ??? You need to get out girl. I bet his thinking is "why buy the cow when I'm getting the milk for free" ?? I'm a man and I can see what this guy is doing to you.
2007-08-06 06:12:05 · answer #8 · answered by gozedown 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sorry , but it's way past time for you to move. He is probably thinking "why buy the cow when you are getting the milk for free." Move on and you will be happier with some one else. Especially some one that is not using you.
2007-08-06 06:14:12 · answer #9 · answered by Beach Bum Wannabe 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Getting married (after being together for so long) changes people (for some unknown reason).
Be sure that you want that legal paper, it really means nothing more than being a legal union of two people. Your basically common law now and happy together for the most part, don't dwell on a legal piece of paper, be thankful.
2007-08-06 06:28:25 · answer #10 · answered by trojan 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋