Family & Relationships - 29 December 2007

About six months ago I made the mistake of cheating on my boyfriend. We weren't doing good, and he had been treating me pretty badly. I had talked to him about it, and he didn't change. I met someone at my job and we saw eachother for about two weeks until my boyfriend found out. YES, I know that this is one of the worst things I could do, but the way that my boyfriend reacted still bothers me to this day. The day that he found out, he took my body mirror out of my room and threw it off of our third floor balcony. He wrote "WH0RE" all over my pictures and all over the cereal boxes. He also called up the guy I had been seeing threatening to beat him up. Although I was the one in the wrong-the way he acted scares me. He also admitted to have been talking to another girl a few months before [although he never cheated on me]..To this day he says I deserved what he did. What do you think?

2007-12-29 19:28:33 · 22 answers · asked by jenn a 1 in Singles & Dating

how do you feel when your husband does this, as no time to even take a second of his busy schduele to say hi when you call!

I just called him now, just to say hi but got "I chat to you later, busy now" & I know he will not call back. I hurts so much

2007-12-29 19:25:24 · 9 answers · asked by Cute 2 in Marriage & Divorce

I am a 28 year old, single, straight, successful, independent, educated, male. I have a great job, which I am quitting soon to pursue a better one and/or more education, I have no financial worries as I live at home with my parents and other adult siblings. No rent! LOL! I am also pretty decent looking to boot! LOL! Am I too much of a perfect package or do people simply date and find love later in life. And no, I don't advertise this in real life, I know this seems arrogant, but I am just laying it all on the table for you to have the true story behind my situation! I know in the movies people date and even get MARRIED around my age, but that is largely fiction. Heck, I haven't even experienced my first kiss yet or even first girlfriend, so I know MOST people are lying when they say they have experienced real relationships at my age or before. An when people learn about my situation in life, they actually mock it? Why are they so jealous? Anyone else see this in their lives?

2007-12-29 19:24:40 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

PLEASE READ THE WHOLE PASSAGE B4 YOU ANSWER. THANKS GUYS:)

At this time last year, I was partying with friends, I even fell asleep at the red light during new years because I was soooo wasted. I woke up and drove to the club and had a good time. I had a very nice apartment in southern california, a great job, lots of friends, good income and a normal life. Then I decided to marry my boyfriend of 1 year and then we moved to Japan. After I got here in august, I got pregnant in sept and now I am 17 wks pregnant. I miss good ole america so much and I am homesick. I dont work anymore... I am now a housewife and I sit on the internet all day or watch TV. I do love him, but I feel on some days that I made a mistake. Is this normal or will I come around and accept my new life? Drastic change, huh?

2007-12-29 19:22:45 · 8 answers · asked by Lovely 4 in Marriage & Divorce

i am the only girl in the fam. so I want a new sister but my parents think its too much work do u think adoption is a choice? Or wat if mom starts to like her more than me ? But me and mom are real close. what should i do?

2007-12-29 19:21:25 · 10 answers · asked by Ana ;; 2 in Family

I am a single, straight, 28 year old male that lives at home with his parents and other adult siblings. I am very successful in my career and I am highly educated as well, so it's not like I am a lazy person as some may want to believe when they hear I choose to live at home. My parents actively encourage their kids to live at home as long as they would like and rent free of course. What I don't understand is the jealousy people have of my living arrangements. If they are so jealous, most of them, I am sure, could make arrangments to move back home. I am the brunt of many nasty comments/jokes like this due to many forms of jealousy. It is worth noting that these arrangements did not come easy. I had to cultivate this great relationship with my family over a number of years. So it's not like anything was doled out to me. Plus, this is the least our parents can do considering all the years of joy we have given them in the past. They get a kick out of that when I tell them that.

2007-12-29 19:20:43 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family

over the stupidest things. I am getting really tired of it. We have been dating for 9 months and i really love her. What can i do.....i have tired talking to her about it she says that she will try her hardest to not make me mad(I am a very irratable person). Less than 5 minutes later she makes me mad again....(I would like a females opinion on this one)

2007-12-29 19:19:45 · 6 answers · asked by tu_chingas_mucho 1 in Singles & Dating

some girl mooched off me and stole from me. tried to tell police but that didnt help. how can I get her back? i cant go around beating people up, i dont wanna mess up my future or get some criminal record. but i do want to get her back, i see her sometimes at clubs and have her number, that is all i have to work on. wut can i do

2007-12-29 19:16:59 · 13 answers · asked by penguin24 1 in Friends

i was just going through a myspace bulletin and it said did you lose your virginity in 2007, and she said not in 2007, haha. what does this mean? she never told me about her first kiss or anything, so is it possible that she's not a virgin? i'm trying to figure this out, and so i'm not sure how to start the subject to find out. does this sound like she's not a virgin? (she's 15)

2007-12-29 19:16:23 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Friends

I was out drinking with friends when they had to go home i stayed i was outside a club and they would not let me in becouse i was to drunk NOT couse i was onley 15 witch i found funny anyway i woke up the next day in someones house she was really hot she was from russia she had taken me off the street where i had passed out she thinks i am 18 and texts me she ask if i am going out clubing this weekend what should i tell her?

2007-12-29 19:16:13 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

so he'z dateing a f**ken whore and he knows that i luv him and we uesd to date but somethings came up and then we broke up . i told him i wanted to get back to gether after a few weeks cause my life way off track and i know he still luvs me and i really do luv him but i don't know what to do ..... help please!

2007-12-29 19:14:45 · 2 answers · asked by olivia c 1 in Singles & Dating

okay two parts.
1. do guys prefer girls that are shy (like me) or ones that put themselves out there for sex or make out

and

2. do guys prefer a "chesty" girl or one that is considerably flat (like me)

in addition, judging by the info about me i just told you, shy and flat chested, what can i do to improve to attract a bf?? i appreciate all help!! :) o, btw, i am 14.

2007-12-29 19:11:18 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

I used to be close to my mum...but since my dad passed away and with a few quarrel incidents with my mum over the buying of a new house...i became distance fm her. I find it very irritating to talk to her..she got the habit of threatening to commit suicide, leaving home...i'm so tired staying with her..i hired a part-time mate to help out with the housework but she dislikes the maid and drove her off. I do feel guilty at times and sympathise with her...but i just cant help it...apart from providing her with material needs, i'm not talking to her at all. I'm so unfilial right...but i really cant help it...i feel like moving out to stay on my own, but worry she will think i abandon her and try to commit suicide again...wat shld i do?

2007-12-29 19:08:18 · 5 answers · asked by Blues 1 in Family

Hi. This girl I really like, we were chatting.
And she told me about her first time.
She said that she didn't bleed so the guy thought that she was not a virgin.
But that it came out later when she was in the bathroom.
Has this ever happened to any other of you women out there?

I told her that I thought this happened because he probably had a very small one!!! :)

2007-12-29 19:06:32 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

been with my bf for almost 3 years. about 3 weeks ago we decided i should move in w/him (my apt lease is up in Feb) so i gave me apts my notice to move out. i have 3 girls part-time ages 8,6,and 5 that he's very close to (i'm 28). he's 29-no kids,never married or lived w/anyone.

over the past 2 weeks-the kids and i have been spending everyday/night there. we spent christmas at his sister's house.

tonite about 10 mins before i was supposed to leave for work-he tells me that he's not ready for us to move in!! I was SO upset. he said that he just needed more time to get used to the kids being around 24-7 and since work has been really stressful for him (which it has)-he hasn't had time to focus on getting used to them. i started to cry and got up to leave and he said he was sorry. i got so angry at him for waiting to tell me right before i had to go to work and he said there wasn't really a good time TO tell me. please read rest..important

2007-12-29 18:59:37 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

been with my bf for almost 3 years. about 3 weeks ago we decided i should move in w/him (my apt lease is up in Feb) so i gave me apts my notice to move out. i have 3 girls part-time ages 8,6,and 5 that he's very close to (i'm 28). he's 29-no kids,never married or lived w/anyone.

over the past 2 weeks-the kids and i have been spending everyday/night there. we spent christmas at his sister's house.

tonite about 10 mins before i was supposed to leave for work-he tells me that he's not ready for us to move in!! I was SO upset. he said that he just needed more time to get used to the kids being around 24-7 and since work has been really stressful for him (which it has)-he hasn't had time to focus on getting used to them. i started to cry and got up to leave and he said he was sorry. i got so angry at him for waiting to tell me right before i had to go to work and he said there wasn't really a good time TO tell me. please read rest..important

2007-12-29 18:58:29 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

The author of Raising a secure child is Zeynep Biringen (2004). Biringen Background is that she is an “associate professor at Colorado state university and a licensed child psychologist.” She wrote the book to inspire the way parents relate to children. It is dedicated to “all the children and families who have participated over the years.” People who read this book will figure out the “strengths and weaknesses in their current parent child relationship and develop new ways of creating stronger, more nourishing emotional bonds with children of any age.”
Biringen explains how children show attachment through “a cluster of behaviors that brings physical closeness to adult caregiver, such as reaching, clinging, sucking.” In children attachment starts very young. I have seen that I have five nephews and two nieces. My two nephews Wyatt and Camden were more attach to my sister-in-law. When Camden was born he was clinging to my sister-in-law. Every time I would watch him we would have to put him in another room with some toys and she would have to sneak out. He is now six years old and he is getting much better, but once in a while he will ask where his mommy is and we would always say she will be home soon. When Wyatt was born he was the same way as Camden and still is. Wyatt is one years old and every time someone watches him he cries. He is so clinging to his mommy. He will probably grow out of it like his brother.
In the book the author talks about childhood attachment through divorce and loss of parent. At any age your parents can divorce or lose a parent. It is a hard feeling to face. A lot of children are attaching to the caretaker and it is hard for them to go through a divorce or loss of a parent. A lot of time when a parent divorce when child is older the child express more anger as suppose when they are younger. A lot of people are different to.
Two examples of how attachment goes through divorce and loss of parent. First example is while I was in eighth grade my parents went through a divorce. I was more attaching to my father than my mother. I would get angry at everybody for no reasons. I was upset, stress out, and I blame it on myself. When I was around my parents I felt like it was my fault and I was afraid to talk about how I felt to anyone. Basically I shut down emotionally, trying to block the anger. All the stress and hurt took a toll on my schooling as well. All that was happening made it hard to focus on my school work.
Second example is about a loss parent. Losing a parent at any age is the worst feeling. Through all the pain, grief, and confusion it can change your life around. I have seen that happen. One of my best friends in high school lost her dad at the age of 16. She was upset, shock, and fearful. It was hard for because her dad died suddenly. It took her awhile to get back on track. To lose someone that close to you and always there for you just don’t get over it in a day. You will never forget that someone close to you.
Biringen talks about Authoritative and Authoritarian and Permissive parenting in school performance. Also in class we talked about Authoritative and Authoritarian and Permissive parenting in discipline. Authoritative is high in warmth and high in confident. Authoritative children do very well in school, very strict, infancy, and self regulate. Also, is distraction, tired, furious and don’t follow behavior modeling and have good relationship. Authoritarian children also do well in school, but are low in warmth and high in control, less confident, low socially. They keep there distance and expect questions. Another one that we talk about in class was permissive. Permissive parents show little warmth, and little on discipline.
She talks about discipline in children. Most people who discipline their children are the way their parents discipline them when they were young. Every child is different even if a child is taught discipline early and develops a sense of right and wrong. A child taught discipline can still be an unruly and out of control. The type of discipline used on the child can help determine how the child will act. Say a child is disciplined in a more abusive manner they may turn out to cause more trouble and start more fights thinking that is how you deal with someone when you don’t like how they act. It can also work the other way. A child raised and disciplined understanding and removal of privileges rather the physical punishment can learn to deal with their problems in the same manner. They can learn to talk out their problems with others rather then resorting to physical or violent methods.
In conclusion most of all, it is about giving each other the gifts of love, trust, and happiness for you and your child. No matter what age you are you can become closer to your child by supporting them through difficult time.

2007-12-29 18:57:30 · 2 answers · asked by deanna307 1 in Family

for all you out there who have put your replys on my daughter nataqskia2002 question regarding how she could start her labour well I am pleased to report that I now have a lovely grandson who was born Saturday at 1:25am 29th Dec 2007 It was the pineapple that worked so thank you everyone .
Oh & he's 6lb 2 oz
now here is the Question how often should nana's visit

2007-12-29 18:52:40 · 8 answers · asked by Mathlian D 1 in Family

i have a stalker. any tips on how to deal with him?

i've already mastered the art of lying and keeping a straight face cuz i'm in drama. i'm good at ditching him cuz i'm short and quick, but he knows where i hang out and with who.

here's some background info: (u don't have to read it)

- i'm a 100% sure that he's gay.
- he denies the fact that he's gay, even though he stands, walks, talks, dresses, and acts gay
- he's 'my best friend' according to him
- he does anything he can to make my life a living hell (tells everyone all this crap about me that's not true, threatens me - he's huge, annoying, and fat, he thinks i'm a worthless peice of crap so he tells it to people who he thinks are listening to a word he says, i hide my comments on myspace, which he sumhow hacks into, reads, and shares with others, forces me to be his partner for projects since he can't find one due to the fact that everyone hates him, and there are plenty more)

2007-12-29 18:46:48 · 10 answers · asked by janey ♥ 4 in Other - Family & Relationships

i am honest here, i do not want any children. they are too much for me to handle, i cant imagine having such a responsbility, and i love my freedom. i want to travel a lot when i get older. however, i would like to have a nice marriage and soul mate future husband....everything that comes with marriage except children.
all the guys i have liked and been with, they have all said they wanted children in the future. that is very discouraging for me, because lets just say i stayed with such a guy, i would feel forced to have children simply to please him....and i would never stay with a guy who wants children that i wouldnt give to him, i wouldnt be able to stand the guilt. the truth is, i dont want any kids. it seems as though every guy wants kids...i dont think i might ever find a guy who doesnt want children.

what do you think?? has anybody else experiencd this??

2007-12-29 18:46:08 · 23 answers · asked by ILoveGreen ZipZapZop 4 in Marriage & Divorce

he shows signs of cheating but my heart believes him when he insists he is not.

2007-12-29 18:39:43 · 9 answers · asked by La La 1 in Marriage & Divorce

alright this isn't a question i had to get this outta my system

To the guy i like:
*you dont know i like you
*your eyes are amazing
*you're hilarious and can always make me laugh
*i want you, but i dont know how to tell you
*you're gorgeous by the way
*you need to check your email more
*i miss you even though you arent mine
*i need to make it more obvious that i like you

alright here's the question: HOW DO I TELL THIS GUY I'm CRAZY ABOUT HIM?

-he's in 2 of my classes
-we just finished a powerpoint together
-he asked me for my email
-he seems shy around me
-at a dance he caught my eye from across the room
-his friends asked if i like him

what do i do?

2007-12-29 18:32:18 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

Im a healthy 21 year old girl. My boyfriend (of about 9 months)'s parents are always making fun of my eating habits. I'm little. i can't eat very much. and even when i gorge myself (big dinners, holidays, etc.) it never sems like enough for those people. not to be mean, but theyre definately overweight, and i just cant eat as much as they can. and im in shape. ive worked really hard for my body. i dealed with anorexia off and on in high school. i'm completely over it now. but every time they get on me about my portions, it takes me back to how my parent used to watch me eat. his dad's not to bad, but his mom is the worst. tonight i was almost brought to tears because of his mom's comments. ("do you want any?... oh of course not." *eye roll) i know i need to say something to my bf about it, im just not sure how to bring it up. any suggestions....?

2007-12-29 18:32:09 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family

I got it off a hair dryer.

2007-12-29 18:30:39 · 8 answers · asked by refuse2lose_2006 3 in Singles & Dating

My close friend and I are darn near sisters separated at birth. I've known her for 8 years. We are very close talking daily since she's in another state. We made a pact years ago that whomever got married, the other will be there for the wedding. Why wasn't I aware of her impromptu (?) wedding until after the fact?! Even if it were spur of the moment, as much as she shares with me, seems she would have called me on the way to the courthouse letting me know of what she was about to do! I could have congratulated her and would appreciate her consideration for filling me in on her exciting news.
I received a general thank you email I'm sure she sent to everyone along with a wedding pic. What hurt me even more is that after reading her message, her wedding sounded more planned due to her thanking people for throwing her a bridal shower! I'm truly questioning our friendship now. It's awkward enough to feel left out but now I don't know about sending her a wedding gift.

Should I send it?

2007-12-29 18:26:20 · 11 answers · asked by lenise1973 2 in Weddings

which one works best u think for couples?

2007-12-29 18:26:01 · 8 answers · asked by luhb u much!! 4 in Singles & Dating

my girlfriend is disabled she is 22 but she can reason well and understand everything takes a while what im trying to say is that she is a slow learner .... besides that she is normal but still disabled. and i want to marry her but I have no idea about her rights as a disabled person Can anyone tell me please if they know how her rights may be different than those of a normal person?

2007-12-29 18:22:36 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Weddings

i know its legal lol, but do you think it is morally "correct" or morally "wrong"??

2007-12-29 18:15:58 · 33 answers · asked by ILoveGreen ZipZapZop 4 in Singles & Dating

OK: My 3 years wedding anniversary is coming up. My husband told me tonight that most marriages fails during the first year? Is this true? What's the average lenght of time (yearly wise) does marriage last in America. Does anyone know of the statistic? Is three years longer than the average?
Thanks in advance

2007-12-29 18:10:22 · 8 answers · asked by Just a girl 1 in Marriage & Divorce

i dont get along with my mom and stepdad at all-they make me feel worthless hated and depressed-control me to extremes (i dont have enough space to explain) She pushed me last week(i didnt even raise my voice this fight for 1nce) so i walked out and didnt come home till the next day. I apologized for not calling-but now she wants to charge me $500 rent/month plus car insurance and prescriptions. I get 1000 a month from social security (dad died-i was 11) and i think this is her way of getting the money since it is in my name now and not hers. I refuse to pay bec. i spend a lot of time at school (its boarding but im a day student so i eat/hang out in the dorm rooms) so im moving out and in with my best friend. Only problem is if i move out I will have to transfer bec. my school wont give me financial aid not under her roof and she knows this and that i dont wanna transfer the end of snyr year so knows I will pay her rather than transfer. is this a type of threat/ blackmail?should i pay?

2007-12-29 18:07:56 · 7 answers · asked by break3bendysgrc 1 in Family