About six months ago I made the mistake of cheating on my boyfriend. We weren't doing good, and he had been treating me pretty badly. I had talked to him about it, and he didn't change. I met someone at my job and we saw eachother for about two weeks until my boyfriend found out. YES, I know that this is one of the worst things I could do, but the way that my boyfriend reacted still bothers me to this day. The day that he found out, he took my body mirror out of my room and threw it off of our third floor balcony. He wrote "WH0RE" all over my pictures and all over the cereal boxes. He also called up the guy I had been seeing threatening to beat him up. Although I was the one in the wrong-the way he acted scares me. He also admitted to have been talking to another girl a few months before [although he never cheated on me]..To this day he says I deserved what he did. What do you think?
2007-12-29 19:28:33 · 22 answers · asked by jenn a 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
for the people who want to say negative things about him not "treating me perfectly"..he lived at my place and refused to pay a dime, he asked me to get up and get EVERYTHING for him and make him each of his meals..if i didnt he'd keep on bugging me, i was not aloud to have any male friends nor go out with girl friends that he did not approve of. i told him i wanted to leave before i cheated and he basically told me that he wasnt going to leave the apartment and if i called the police he'd wait until they left to come. and did i not say i know i was wrong?
2007-12-29 19:41:40 · update #1
Destruction of property is a crime, regardless of your cheating. And threatening bodily harm on another is also a crime. You suck for cheating, and he sucks for being an asshole.
2007-12-29 19:31:56 · answer #1 · answered by Nunya B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He definitely needs anger management. If you are planning to marry this dude.. I think you can be in more trouble, unless he finds a way to handle his temper. Hopefully he doesn't go further than destroying property. Luckily you didn't get hurt. Since he scares you still today.. it isn't fine. You need to tell him that fighting and destroying things aren't a good way to solve problems. He should be more open toward his feelings and be talking to you about them, not through objects. Just tell him that you know what you did was wrong and ask for forgiveness. Promise him you will never do it again and you have to stick with the promise. And make him promise not to go all crazy if he gets angry again. However, if your relationship still isn't fine now.. you know the right thing to do is to end it. I mean its been more than 6 months and you still haven't worked anything out! And if you keep going through a bad relationship.. both of you might end up cheating again and end up hurting each other more. On the other hand, if you are fine in this relationship.. look on the bright side.. the destruction of your property showed how much your boyfriend cared about you. Maybe the way he handled his anger wasn't right, but he did have feelings and they were crushed. It shows that he loves you and how hurt he was. Just try and make things right and suggest that he doesn't get that angry anymore.
Good luck. =)
2007-12-29 19:40:58 · answer #2 · answered by ninnx3 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't blame yourself completely about this. Your boyfriend deserves not some but MOST of the blame. I still admit, you should have tried harder with your boyfriend instead of sneaking out the backdoor. But, your boyfriend went too far. To me it sounds like he has serious issues with taming his anger. Also he didn't respect you, as he clearly proved by calling you a whore and writing it all over your property. I think you should move on, because it sounds like he won't change for a long time. You can stay with him if you actually have enough patience waiting for him to change, but normally, most people wouldn't even wait that long. Does he even show any love? If not, he obviously does not respect you at all. Like I said, you should move on, and see the other guy again if he's a good person.
2007-12-30 14:50:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey what you did was perfectly natural, his behaviour was not, what he did was bordering on psychotic I would be very wary of staying long term with someone who displayed such dangerous and volatile behaviour. You run the risk of becoming a statistic,"battered woman syndrome" If I were you I would sever all contact with this HE MAN and have nothing further to do with him, having said that, I think you will have your hands full just getting away from the guy. But persevere as remaining with an abusive person of this type things will only escalate. best of luck.
2007-12-29 19:41:41 · answer #4 · answered by Daddy bear 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
they dont, particularly easy, i under no circumstances felt the could desire to take it out on the ex's crap....i in easy terms cared that he packed it up and have been given the hell out of my homestead (confident, it became mine in the previous he moved there) so youd could desire to ask the various people who definitely do this to get an answer. additionally, for the record, cheating isn't the worst factor you're able to do in a relationship, identity fairly be cheated on then hit, or mentally or verally abused on a regular basis. theres a good number of issues which could be executed that are worse then cheating, im no longer saying cheating isnt undesirable with the help of any means, yet its some distance from the worst they are able to do.
2016-10-02 21:12:46 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's a hypocrite ******. To quote Ron White " I'm a good dog, but if you don't pet me, it's gonna be hard to keep me under the porch. You shouldn't have cheated, and you know that, but you weren't being loved. What does he expect. If you were in a truly great relationship and you cheated it would be different. But you weren't, you did what you did, and it over. Try to forget it, and go out there and find a MAN who truly loves you and respects you like a MAN should.
:) Hope I helped
2007-12-29 19:36:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think if youre to the point in a relationship that youre going to cheat you should break up with your boyfriend first. You were trying to get even and it backfired on you. Its better to just end it and move on instead of cheating. He didnt deserve what you did and you didnt deserve what he did.
2007-12-29 19:41:09 · answer #7 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds pretty immature what he did but obviously he had a lot of feelings for you to go into that type of a rage. Move on, just be happy he didn't beat the crap out of you or your new man. You should have broke up with him first and it never would have happened.
2007-12-29 19:33:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a little extreme. He could have injured someone by throwing that mirror! It's best just to move on.
You obviously deserved some kind of negative comments by him though.
2007-12-29 19:32:22 · answer #9 · answered by Emi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you didn't deserve it but you shouldn't of cheated and lied either. I'm sure he was very angry but after 6 months you would think he would of let go of some of his feelings.
It's best you got away from him.. just let things go and the things you lost that day are better than him doing that to you.
2007-12-29 19:33:19 · answer #10 · answered by Gina 7 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
way out of line...the cereal box...what did captain crunch do to him??? well he is a jealous type and revengeful. are you still together? is this really how you want the rest of your relationship to go...him always second guessing you and throwing your stuff out of windows. you both are wrong...but you threw the first punch. ask yourself these questions...did you learn what might happen if you cheat on someone in the future? is it something you will do again? i think him trashing your stuff is way better then what a lot of these crazy guys do when there loved one cheats on them. consider yourself lucky
2007-12-29 19:38:14 · answer #11 · answered by ryan n 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋