Im a healthy 21 year old girl. My boyfriend (of about 9 months)'s parents are always making fun of my eating habits. I'm little. i can't eat very much. and even when i gorge myself (big dinners, holidays, etc.) it never sems like enough for those people. not to be mean, but theyre definately overweight, and i just cant eat as much as they can. and im in shape. ive worked really hard for my body. i dealed with anorexia off and on in high school. i'm completely over it now. but every time they get on me about my portions, it takes me back to how my parent used to watch me eat. his dad's not to bad, but his mom is the worst. tonight i was almost brought to tears because of his mom's comments. ("do you want any?... oh of course not." *eye roll) i know i need to say something to my bf about it, im just not sure how to bring it up. any suggestions....?
2007-12-29 18:32:09 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If it were me, I would completely confront the parents and call them on it when they said something. But, that's just me, I am pretty blunt when it comes to people bringing me down. You have worked really hard for where you are now with your health, and for people to say mean things when they themselves need help, well, they just need to be called on it. Maybe they don't know how this is affecting you emotionally, either. When people say mean stuff like that, more then 3/4 of them have insecurities of their own, and with you saying they are overweight, they are probably just jealous anyways. Since it's your boyfriends parents, I would be sincere in whatever you choose to say to them, but you definitely need to confront them on it as soon as possible. It will get it out in the open, and perhaps they will realize how insensitive they have been. Good luck to you in whatever you decide, and congratulations on becoming the healthy girl that you are!!
2007-12-29 18:39:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
eating too much is not good for you and eating too little is not good either. You eat till you get full- point blank- dont eat for others. What you need to make sure (since this was a problem for you before) make sure you eat 5 meals a day were 3 of those are larger meals. get the right amount of calories your body needs. as for your bfs mother, just talk to her ALONE. tell her that it bothers you when she makes comments like that. if she says she is kidding tell her its not a joke to you. You take what she says seriously since you appreciate her.
2007-12-29 20:12:03 · answer #2 · answered by lukewarm 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Attitudes about food don't change quickly. You will probably be happiest if you avoid any situations that involve meals with your bfs family. For occasions that require you to eat with his family, just understand that they have been brought up to have the attitudes they have toward food and roll with whatever they say to the best of your ability. Best wishes!
2007-12-29 18:39:14 · answer #3 · answered by Nikolas M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dunno...it sounds like you dont match their family... :( I dated a guy whose sister used to make fun of how I spoke and it just didnt give me a good feeling being at their home. The guy I was dating used to laugh with his sister about it and it used to hurt me. Just like how your bf doesnt stick up for you, it's a major red flag if you ask me. He must be around if you are eating with his parents?
2007-12-29 22:39:46 · answer #4 · answered by Lilikoi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stand up for yourself, but let your boyfriend know beforehand, what you intend to do, then, next time you are being made fun of because of your small appetite, just say "you should be happy that I dont eat much, cos that leaves more for you".
2007-12-29 18:36:41 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forget about talking to your b/f go straight to the source, his mother. Tell her about your past and maybe you being honest and trusting her to confide in, she may ease up on you a little.
Going to your b/f and asking him to say something will make you look like your whinging and to afraid to speak up.
2007-12-29 18:47:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if they are just teasing you and you are taking it way to seriously...they have no idea that you had/have an eating disorder, so you have one of two choices and that is to bare your soul and tell them about your disorder and that their innocent comments are upsetting you or you can just take them for what they are" innocent "and try not to be so sensitive.Whenever they say anything just remind yourself they are teasing.
2007-12-29 23:36:12 · answer #7 · answered by mom23 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you sound like a drama queen.
you know you can't eat a lot and that you have little portions, they're just poking fun at it. don't be so sensitive.
2007-12-29 18:49:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
talk to your b/f.
2007-12-29 18:34:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋