I used to be close to my mum...but since my dad passed away and with a few quarrel incidents with my mum over the buying of a new house...i became distance fm her. I find it very irritating to talk to her..she got the habit of threatening to commit suicide, leaving home...i'm so tired staying with her..i hired a part-time mate to help out with the housework but she dislikes the maid and drove her off. I do feel guilty at times and sympathise with her...but i just cant help it...apart from providing her with material needs, i'm not talking to her at all. I'm so unfilial right...but i really cant help it...i feel like moving out to stay on my own, but worry she will think i abandon her and try to commit suicide again...wat shld i do?
2007-12-29 19:08:18 · 5 answers · asked by Blues 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Why do you think it is so important for you to be right? She is the victom. She lost someone dear to her and is having a hard time dealing with it. It's really not about you. It's about her having to deal with a great loss. For a sort time try to take the focus off of you and be more supportive to her.
2007-12-29 19:14:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
fix your relationship with your mum, youve already lost one parent, how are you going to feel if she actually does commit suicide while you arnt speaking to her? its hard on you both from losing a close one, but you knew your dad would pass before you(as all children should) but this was her life partner, she more than likely never had to deal with issues on her own, going from her fathers house into your fathers. And why were you fighting over her getting a new house? with the falling market you should be glad you'll always have a home to come too when you do leave and start your own family. Talk to her about how you feel and let her know that you dont want to be the parent in this situation. Don't threaten to move out, or yell at her, just cry over your losses and move into your new relationship as equals.
2007-12-30 03:27:44 · answer #2 · answered by bethan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mom seems like she is so afraid that you will leave that she will say anything to keep you there; she will even use guilt.
Have a honest compasionate conversation with her and talk about your concerns. Let her talk out her concerns. She must be missing your dad very much. This is your mom. Get the other family involved. Give her a kiss everyday! Tell her you love her.
I know it is not easy but it has to be done.
2007-12-30 03:22:27 · answer #3 · answered by omega_cage 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand what your going through. My parents passed and it was really difficult to deal with my siblings. I know you want to move on with your life and start fresh without worry, but fact is, you will be worried about your mother and blame yourself for whatever negative outcome may come out of this. What i suggest is meeting with a family counselor where you and your mother can go and have a group session then a one on one to release what you have inside. i think this step will not only help your mother with her grieving but also help you do what is best for your future. all the best to you and your family.
2007-12-30 03:17:24 · answer #4 · answered by lukewarm 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
u have to stand by ur mother
our mothres were always there for us. try to help her by bringing joy again to her life. i think if u moved out she might deteriorate more.
u may lose hope sometime, but its not the end of the world, there will always be a way out for her from this situation.
be the one to let her out of it, ull find happiness in helping the person who cares the most for ur wellbeing and happiness.
dont leave her in her worst times. she was there for u in urs.
she maybe sound evil but she probably doesnt mean it.
good luck
2007-12-30 03:20:29 · answer #5 · answered by Rula M 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋