Jokes & Riddles - November 2007

"Doctor Doctor I feel like a pair of curtains" "That's the least of your problems, you've got AIDS"

2007-11-30 09:30:23 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

A man had a terrible passion for baked beans, but they always had a somewhat lively effect on him. After he met the woman of his dreams, he made the supreme sacrifice and gave them up; he couldn't imagine subjecting his new wife to his beastly emissions. On his birthday, his car broke down, so he called his wife and told her he'd have to walk home. He walked past a cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked beans overwhelmed him. Since he was still a couple of miles from home, he figured he could indulge, and then walk off any ill effects. So he had three extra-large helpings of beans, and he "put-putted" all the way home. His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!" She blindfolded him, and led him to his chair at the head of the table, making him promise not to peek. At this point, he was beginning to feel another one coming on. Just as she was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang and she went to answer it. While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was not only loud, but ripe as a rotten egg. He gasped and felt for his napkin and fanned the air about him. He had just started to feel better, when another urge came on. This one sounded like a diesel engine revving, and smelled worse. He tried flapping his arms, to clear the air. But another one snuck out, and the windows rattled, the dishes on the table shook, and a minute later, the flowers on the table were dead. When he heard his wife ending her conversation, he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top of it. He was the picture of innocence when she walked in. Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner. He assured her he had not, so she removed the blindfold and yelled, "Surprise!!!" To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated around the table for his surprise birthday party.

2007-11-30 09:27:40 · 34 answers · asked by anonymous 4

Otherwise, it's the funniest I've ever heard.

4 nuns were out for their weekly post-mass Sunday drive. Unfortunately the nun driving lost control of the car and crashed head-on into an oncoming semi truck. All four are killed instantly.

So the 4 nuns arrive at the gates of heaven to find St. Peter waiting for them.

"Sisters," he began "You have all lived full lives in the service of God and will be rewarded in His kingdom."

"However," he continued "before you can enter, you must each answer one question honestly...and remember God knows all."

So the 1st nun comes forward

"Sister," he asked "Have you ever touched a penis?"

"Oh yes, St. Peter, I have," she said "only once, with my finger."

"Very well," he replied "You may dip your finger in the holy water & go on in."

The 2nd nun comes forward & he asks her the same thing.

"Yes." she replied "Just once...with my hand."

"Excellent, dip your hand in the holy water & go on in"

The 3rd nun comes forward

2007-11-30 09:23:59 · 15 answers · asked by Beetso 2

A blonde's house was on fire. She called 911 and started screaming, "Help me, please! My house is burning! Hurry!"
The operator said, "Okay, calm down and we'll be there soon. How do we get to your house?"

The blonde answered, "Duh, in that big red truck!"

2007-11-30 09:14:08 · 15 answers · asked by anonymous 4

Bartender, gimme 'nother drink, says a very drunk man.
"Sorry sir," replies the bartender. "I have to cut you off."

"Just gimme another drink."

"O.K. I''ll make a deal with you. I''ll give you another drink and call you a cab. When the cab comes, regardless of whether you''re done or not you have to go."

"Thass a good deal," the drunk says. He gets his drink and immediately pukes all over his own shirt. "Oh ****, what am I gonna do now? My wife's gonna kill me."

"Relax," the bartender says, "give me a five-dollar bill." The bartender folds up the bill and puts it in the guy''s shirt pocket. "When you get home, tell your wife you were in the bar and some drunk puked on you and gave you five bucks to have your shirt cleaned."

"Thass a great idea!"

When the drunk gets home his wife answers the door. "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? LOOK AT YOUR SHIRT! WHAT HAPPENED?"

He tried to put on his most sober voice and said, "Relaaaax honey, some drunk guy puked on me and gave me five bucks to have my shirt cleaned."

The drunk's wife reaches in his pocket, grabs the money, and says, "THERE'S TEN BUCKS HERE!"

"Oh yeah, he sh*t in my pants, too."

2007-11-30 09:10:28 · 8 answers · asked by anonymous 4

>The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a>surrogate father to start their family.>On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife>goodbye and said, "Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.">>Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer>happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.>>"Good morning, Ma'am", he said, "I've come to...">>"Oh, no need to explain," Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, "I've been>expecting you.">>"Have you really?" said the photographer. "Well, that's good. Did you>know babies are my specialty?">>"Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have>a seat">>After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?">>"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the>couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room>floor is fun. You can really spread out there.">>"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and>me!">>"Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we>try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles,>I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.">>"My, that's a lot!", gasped Mrs. Smith.>>"Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be>In and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with>that.">>"Don't I know it," said Mrs. Smith quietly.>>The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his>baby pictures.>>"This was done on the top of a bus," he said.>>"Oh, my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.>>"And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider>their mother was so difficult to work with.">>"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.>>"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the>job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a>good look">>"Four and five deep?" said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.>>"Yes", the photographer replied. "And for more than three hours too.>The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly>concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots.>>Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had>to pack it all in.">>Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "Do you mean they actually chewed on your,>uh...equipment?">>"It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod>and we can get to work right away.">>"Tripod?">>"Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much>too big to be held in the hand very long.">>Mrs. Smith fainted!!>>_________________________________________________________________

2007-11-30 09:07:42 · 23 answers · asked by bravo 3

i need to find a CLEAN and SHORT (like not one of those story-type ones) joke for an audition (don't ask why haha).

it can't be offensive to any religious or ethnic groups... and no blonde jokes or dead baby jokes.

and please tell me what you think of this one:
why didn't the apple and the orange get married?
A: because they CAN'T ALOPE!

2007-11-30 09:02:06 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

-----



He's A Goner ~
A man and a woman were dating. She, being of a religious nature, had held back the worldly pleasure that he wanted from her so badly.

In fact, he had never even seen her naked.

One day, as they slowly drove down the freeway, she remarked about his slow-driving habits. 'I can't stand it anymore,' she told him. 'Let's play a game. For every 5 miles per hour over the speed limit [60 MPH] you drive, I'll remove one piece of clothing.

He enthusiastically agreed and sped up the car.
* He reached the 65 MPH mark, so she took off her blouse.

* At 70 off came the pants.

* At 75 it was her bra...and

* At 80 her panties.

Now seeing her naked for the first time...and traveling faster than he ever had before...he became very excited and lost control of the car. He veered off the road, went over an embankment and hit a tree!

His girlfriend was not hurt, but he was trapped. She tried to pull him free but he was stuck. 'Go to the road and get help,' he said.

'I don't have anything to cover myself with!' she replied. The man felt around, but could only reach one of his shoes.

'You'll have to put this between your legs to cover it up,' he told her.

So she did as he said and went up to the road for help. Along came a truck driver. Seeing a naked, crying woman along the road, he pulled over to hear her story.

'My boyfriend! My boyfriend!' she sobs, 'He's stuck and I can't pull him out!'

The truck driver looking down at the shoe between her legs replies,'Ma'am, if he's in that far, I'm afraid he's a goner!'

2007-11-30 08:58:36 · 13 answers · asked by ♥ £ðx¥ Ðå痢 ♥ 5

Two men are taking a test, one man said to the other
"I keep getting a negative for number 10, what does that mean?"
The other man replies by saying
"It means your gay!"
"yeah, really funny, I'm gonna ask the professer!" said the first man.
The first man walks up to the professer and hands him the sheet. Then the male professer asks
"So, what are you doing tonight?"

2007-11-30 08:55:25 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

Lady it trying to breastfeed her baby in a bus. But baby wouldn't eat. So mom goes --"If you don't eat, I'll give booby to that man". Baby keeps refusing to eat. So mom goes again --"If you don't eat, that man will get all milk, and you'll go hungry." The baby still doesn't eat. The man can't take this anymore and says --"Listen lady, make up your mind, I should have came out two stops ago".

2007-11-30 08:51:31 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

A fairy asked me once if I'd like to have a big penis or good memory. I'm not sure what I picked.

2007-11-30 08:31:02 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

Three moles waliking through their tunnel. Papa mole in front says "sniff, sniff, I smell bacon". Moma mole, next in line says, "sniff, sniff, I smell eggs". Baby mole last in line says "sniff, sniff, I smell ___________".

2007-11-30 07:57:08 · 17 answers · asked by abluheron1 4

My wonderful girlfriend & I had been dating for a year, so we decided 2 get married. There was only one little thing bothering me. It was her beautiful younger sister. She wore very tight miniskirts, & was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, & I always got more than a nice view. One day her "little" sister called & asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, & she said she had feelings & desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, & if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me." I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned & made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car. Then my future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our
little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."

And the moral of this story is:

Always keep your condoms in your car.

2007-11-30 07:42:27 · 15 answers · asked by Baby Jack born 4/5/09 4

Two married buddies are out drinking one night, when one
turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't
know what else to do... Whenever I go home after we've
been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get
to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the
garage. I take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak
up the stairs, get undressed in the bathroom, stick my foot
in the toilet and pee down my leg to prevent splashing sounds,
I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up, and yells at me
for staying out so late and coming home drunk!"












His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you're
obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the
driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, pee hard into
the toilet water, then use the full flush with the seat up,
throw my shoes in the closet, undress in the bedroom, then
jump into bed, slap her on the a*s and say, 'WHO'S
HO*NY????!!!' She acts like she's sound asleep!"

2007-11-30 07:33:14 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous

According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while
both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer
each year, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning
of winter, usually late November to mid-December. Female
reindeer retain their antlers until after they give birth
in the spring.




Therefore, according to every historical rendition depicting
Santa's reindeers, every single one of them, from
Rudolph to Blitzen... had to be a girl.




We should've known. Only women would be able to drag
a fat man in a red velvet suit all around the world in one night,
and not get lost.












The moral of the story is:




1- Girls are physically strong.
2- Girls have a good sense of orientation.
3- Girls like to be tied and then whipped.
4- Girls will do anything for an old, badly dressed geezer
as long as he has a lot of gifts.

2007-11-30 07:32:48 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?




Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented
Are




Amnesia --- I Don't Know if I'll be Home for Christmas






Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me




Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and
Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses
and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and ..




Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me




Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting
on an Open Fire




Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm
Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll tell You
Why




Obsessive Compulsive Disorder ---Jingle Bells, Jingle
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells ...




Agoraphobia --- I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't
Leave My House

2007-11-30 07:31:50 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

President George W. Bush is visiting an elementary school, and he visits one of the 4th grade classes. The students and their teacher are in the middle of a discussion about words and their meanings.

The teacher asks the President if he would like to lead the class in a discussion of the word "tragedy," so the president asks the class for an example of a tragedy.

One little boy stands up and offers, "If my best friend, who lives next door, is playing in the street and a car comes along and runs him over, that would be a tragedy."

"No" says Bush, "that would be an accident."

A little girl raises her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone involved, that would be a tragedy."

"I'm afraid not" explains the President. "That's what we would call a GREAT LOSS."

The room goes silent. No other children volunteer. President Bush searches the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally, way in the back of the room, a boy named Johnny raises his hand. In a quiet voice he says, "If Air Force One, carrying you and Mrs. Bush, was struck by a missile and blown up to smithereens, that would be a tragedy."

"Correct" exclaims Bush, "that's right. And can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?"

"Well," Lil' Johnny said, "because, like you just told us, it wouldn't be an accident, and it sure as hell wouldn't be a great loss."

2007-11-30 07:23:17 · 23 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

Please clean and funny. I will choose the best answer and of course rate it the highest.

2007-11-30 07:21:25 · 3 answers · asked by Vctory 2

A girl was helping her boyfriend set up his PC and he wanted
to log in with a password. Now, you have to understand he's
got somewhat of a rebellious attitude and goes for the shock
effect. So, when the computer asked him to enter his password,
he keys in "pen*s".




His girlfriend nearly fell off the chair from laughing
so hard when the computer replied...:




PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH.

2007-11-30 07:19:42 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

There were three little old ladies sitting on a park bench
having a quiet conversation when a flasher approached
from across the park. The flasher came up to the ladies,
stood right in front of them and opened his trench coat.






The first lady immediately had a stroke.




Then the second lady also had a stroke.




But the third lady, being older and more feeble, couldn't
reach that far.

2007-11-30 07:19:32 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

Two men sharing a room in the local hospital are scheduled
for surgery. Both are having prostrate problems.




The nurse arrives to do her duties as ordered.




The first man gets prepared, recieves a happy shot and to his
delight the nurse reaches below his sheets and grabs ahold
of his shaft; as she starts to stroke him gently, the man
says "Hey what is this? Not that I mind, I’m just alittle
curious? Doc didn’t mention a hand*ob?"




The nurse instructed him to relax and enjoy. It was normal
procedure to make sure there was no sperm present when the
procedure was being carried out.




The man did as he was told and shortly there after reached
climax and laid back with a smile on his face.




Watching the nurse as she continued on her duties making
ready the next patient. First a shave, then a shot and then
instead of the reaching under the roomates sheets, she
pulled them back and began what appeared to be one hell of
a good blow*ob...

2007-11-30 07:18:34 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

Two old pensioners are taking a trip down memory lane by going back to
the place where they first met.
Sitting at a café, the little old man says, "Remember the first time I
met you over 50 years ago? We left this cafe, went round the corner
behind the gas works, and I gave you one from behind."
"Why, yes, I remember it well, dear," replies the little old lady with
a grin.
"Well, for old time's sake, let's go there again. and I'll give you
one from behind."
The two pensioners pay their bill and leave the cafe. A young man
sitting next to them has overheard the conversation and smiles to
himself, thinking it would be quite amusing to see two old pensioners
at it. He gets up and follows them. Sure enough, he sees the two
pensioners near the gas works. The little old lady pulls off her
knickers and lifts up her dress.
The old man pulls down his pants and grabs the lady's hips, and the
little old lady reaches for the fence. Well, what follows is 40
minutes of the most athletic sex the man has ever seen. The little old
man is banging away at the little old woman at a pace that can only be
described as phenomenal. Limbs are flying everywhere, the movement is
a blur, and they do not stop for a single second. Finally, they
collapse and don't move for an hour.
Well, the man is stunned. Never in his life has he ever seen anything
that equates to this -- not in the movies, not from his friends, not
from his own experiences.
Reflecting on what he has just seen, he says to himself, "I have to
know his secret. If only I could screw like that now, let alone in 50
years' time!"
The two old pensioners have by this time recovered and dressed
themselves. Plucking up courage, the man approaches the pensioner.
He says, "Sir, in all my life I have never seen anybody shag like
that, particularly at your age. What's your secret? Could you screw
like that 50 years ago?"
The pensioner replies, "Son, 50 years ago, that f*cking fence wasn't
electrified."

2007-11-30 07:15:41 · 17 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

There was a little boy whose mother was about to have a baby. One day,
the little boy walked in and saw his mother naked. He asked his mother
what the hair between her legs was.
She responded, "It's my wash cloth."
Weeks later, after the mother had her baby, the young boy walked in on
his mother again. While she was in the hospital, the doctor had shaved
her pubic hair.
The boy asked, "What happened to your wash cloth?"
The mother responded, "I lost it."
The little boy, trying to be helpful, set out to find his mother's
washcloth.
A few days later, he ran to his mother yelling and screaming, "I found
your washcloth."
The mother, thinking that the child was just playing, went along with
the boy and asked, "Where did you find it?"
The boy answered, "The maid has it! She is washing daddy's face with
it."

2007-11-30 07:08:52 · 19 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

She said she wants a 'double entendre'!

Shall I give her one?

2007-11-30 07:07:36 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

It is Thanksgiving Day and a family is preparing dinner awaiting the
arrival of the children's grandparents. Thomas, who is four is running
around looking for is new pair of grey socks. He ventures up to the
washroom where his mother is putting makeup on. Not realizing the boy
is there she yells "sh*t" when she accidently gets makeup in her eyes.
Never hearing the word before, the boy asks her, "Mommie, what does
sh*t mean?"
The mother quickly replies, "Sh*t is just another word for makeup
dear."
Thomas then asks his mom if she knows where his socks are and she
tells him to go downstairs and ask his father.
The boy's father is stuffing the turkey when he cuts his finger by
mistake. He says "f*ck." The boy asks him if he's seen his socks and
the father tells him to go look in his sister's room. Before the boy
leaves he asks his father what f*ck means and the father says "stuff".
"Like stuffing a turkey."
The boy goes to his sister's room and finally finds his socks in the
bedroom and puts them on just as the doorbell rings. Thomas runs down
the stairs and opens the door. He greets his grandparents by saying
"Hello grandma and grandpa, mommie is upstairs putting sh*t on her
face and daddy is in the kitchen f*cking the turkey..."

2007-11-30 07:04:42 · 22 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy". I call my dog
"Sex".
Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to get his
license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He
said, "I'd like to have one too." Then I said, "But this is a dog." He
said I didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "You don't
understand, I've had Sex since I was 9 year old." He said I must have
been quite a kid.
When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I
told the hotel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a
special room for Sex. He said that every room in the place was for
sex. I said, "You don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night." The
Clerk said "Me too."
One day I entered Sex in a contest but before the competition began,
the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing
there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex entered in
the contest. He told me that I should have sold tickets. "But you
don't understand", I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on television." He
called me a show-off.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to file for custody of
the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I got married." The
judge said "Me too." Then I told him that after I was married, Sex had
left me. He said, "Me too."
Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for
him. A cop came over to me and asked "What are you doing in this alley
at 4 in the morning?" I said, "I'm looking for Sex..."
My case comes up on Friday...

2007-11-30 06:59:19 · 23 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took
one look at her, and all his professionalism went out the window.
He immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed, the doctor
began to stroke her thigh.
Doing so, he asked her, "Do you know what I'm doing?"
"Yes," she replied, "you're checking for any abrasions or
dermatological abnormalities."
"That is right," said the doctor.
He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
"Yes," the woman said, "you're checking for any lumps or breast
cancer."
"Correct," replied the shady doctor.
Finally, he mounted his patient and started having sexual intercourse
with her.
He asked, "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
"Yes," she said. "You're getting herpes, which is why I came here in
the first place."

2007-11-30 06:56:23 · 21 answers · asked by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7

Why it's better to be a Woman!

1. We got off the Titanic first.
2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.
4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.
6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.
7. Taxis stop for us.
8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).
11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.
12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.
13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.
15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.
18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.
19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.
22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.
23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.
25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.
26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.
28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.
30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions

2007-11-30 06:42:25 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

EXAMPLE : 3M IN A B--- 3MEN IN A BOAT ,
STUCK ON THESE 2 !!
21 S ON A D
33 V IN THE HB

2007-11-30 06:41:07 · 2 answers · asked by oddjob 2

One day this lil boy got scared and his dad was out of town so he asked his mom if he culd sleep with her! She said "sure just dont look under the covers" He said ok. So he looked under the covers. he siad mommy whats that! she said that my garage! he said ok. so the next night his mom was out of town and he said can i sleep with you he said "as long as you dnt look under the covers" OK he siad! So he looked he said whats that! he said my lawn mower he said ok so the next night he slept with them agian and siad why is your lawn mower in mommas garage?

2007-11-30 06:40:31 · 3 answers · asked by evangeline_chick 1