A man had a terrible passion for baked beans, but they always had a somewhat lively effect on him. After he met the woman of his dreams, he made the supreme sacrifice and gave them up; he couldn't imagine subjecting his new wife to his beastly emissions. On his birthday, his car broke down, so he called his wife and told her he'd have to walk home. He walked past a cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked beans overwhelmed him. Since he was still a couple of miles from home, he figured he could indulge, and then walk off any ill effects. So he had three extra-large helpings of beans, and he "put-putted" all the way home. His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!" She blindfolded him, and led him to his chair at the head of the table, making him promise not to peek. At this point, he was beginning to feel another one coming on. Just as she was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang and she went to answer it. While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was not only loud, but ripe as a rotten egg. He gasped and felt for his napkin and fanned the air about him. He had just started to feel better, when another urge came on. This one sounded like a diesel engine revving, and smelled worse. He tried flapping his arms, to clear the air. But another one snuck out, and the windows rattled, the dishes on the table shook, and a minute later, the flowers on the table were dead. When he heard his wife ending her conversation, he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top of it. He was the picture of innocence when she walked in. Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner. He assured her he had not, so she removed the blindfold and yelled, "Surprise!!!" To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated around the table for his surprise birthday party.
2007-11-30 09:27:40 · 34 answers · asked by anonymous 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
best joke i've heard all day!
2007-11-30 10:54:49 · answer #1 · answered by crazy4music 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Brilliant
2007-11-30 09:31:25 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
OMG! that was so funny I was cracking up for like 10 minutes.
I'm still not over it yet! I e-mailed this to bunch of my friends.
I would be so embarrassed if that happened to me. I wouldn't come out of my room for years! LOLZ
2007-11-30 09:45:05 · answer #3 · answered by ★Faith★ 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Funny! 10!
2007-11-30 09:39:22 · answer #4 · answered by cats 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Haha! Yes it's funny :) Star!!
Baked beans do smell delicious, but I don't like the taste. :)
2007-11-30 09:30:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Haha that's disgusting and funny at the same time :D
2007-11-30 09:49:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
omg i was just about to say how stupid i dont get it when i got it. hahahaha i would hate to be a guest at that party! * 4 u
2007-11-30 09:37:02 · answer #7 · answered by ~Morgan~ 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This story is actually pretty old, but somewhat funny when it makes the rounds.
2007-11-30 09:30:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 0⤋
AHAHAHAHAHA!!! TOO FUNNY!!!
That seriously sucks for him though. I'd hate it if that happened to me. But shockingly, none of them, not one said anything or better yet... LEFT THE ROOM!!!!
lol wow... I liked it though...
2007-11-30 09:47:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hahahaa lmao! my bf told me this story like 4 years ago, and I still crack up to this day! wow I hope that never happens to me..I would more more than mortified!
2007-11-30 09:52:23 · answer #10 · answered by inlovewithlife08 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LMAO!! How embarrassing!! Funny joke.
2007-11-30 09:33:53 · answer #11 · answered by Andrea H 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋