Marriage & Divorce - 2 December 2007

I've been with this man for a year and things have gone steadily downhill, he's had an affair, spent all our money, and I mean all of it. Won't go to church with me or to therapy. I married for love- truly, but it seems he did not. As I write this I know I've been a complete fool. He had a terrible upbringing but who hasn't had their share of pain and despair? Does anyone have a story similar to this where things have worked out? -Aside from the loved one being struck by lightening or having a concussion where the selfish personality is miraculously changed? Help.

2007-12-02 17:06:55 · 20 answers · asked by min_99_28562 1

2007-12-02 17:04:22 · 11 answers · asked by ariel 1

We are both 24. He lies alot, even about the stupidest things sometimes...I always forgive him...because I believe that it's not his fault he is this way...he grew up in a broken home that was poor, and since he was a little kid he was surrounded by peers who's parents were extremely rich. He would lie to cover up the fact that he was not as fortunate...and I'm guessing this turned into a habit...one where he doesn't like to be looked down on...we are now both studying our MBAs now, and doing really well. He always talks about how he's going to make so much money and be rich and buy me this and that and our big house and kids and cars...but I'm really scared that money will change someone who's never had money...corrupt him...what if he's only with me b/c he has nothing...but when he's rich, he will cheat on me with the type of girl that used to laugh at him b/c he had no money... and he wants to prove eveyrone wrong? Especially when he has this compulsive lying problem? Help me..!

2007-12-02 17:00:29 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

okay heres my problem i have a baby boy who i love and he has nothing to do with this..but hes had was very verbally abusive to me during my pregnancy. and even after we arent together we see each other cause of the baby...he calls me fat and ugly..tells me i need to loose weight i know i dont look the same..but i just had a baby i knows it been 8months but still.im trying to get back to normal but is hard when im the only one takin care of him and he demands my attention all the time......wat do i do..shud i get help...i feel so ugly..but i know is not my fault...but the way this guy makes me feel...is so ugly and i jsut cant take it anymore..and theres no way i can get out of it..cause i still have to see his face cause we have a babytogether..he cheated on me verbally abused me and i cant take all this anger i have inside. i dont know wat to do.

2007-12-02 16:41:32 · 12 answers · asked by agutieres 2

If you are talking to a guy, and you are thinking of saying something which conflicts with his suggestion, but don't say it....however, he somehow notices it and says "there is a but on your lips".... is he flirting or paying too much attention?

2007-12-02 16:36:59 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous

okay.. even if she was chatting as a friend.. like haven't meet the ex-bf since 7 years ago. so u found out abt it. u know she loves u to death.. will u be angry or break up with her? and u know she doesn't love the ex-bf, but the ex-bf still loves your gf. the question is.. is your gf betraying u of hiding it from u?

2007-12-02 16:36:31 · 10 answers · asked by Tina J 1

My wife got upset with me when I told he that I had some concerns with a friend I felt was being dishonest. The story is that her and her friend(s) enjoyed a lady's night out and stopped at a forbidden hot spot. Not forbidden by myself but her friends husband. I was asked not to say a word of this to the husband during a rare couples night out. Afterwards I expressed to my wife that I felt very uncomfortable to be asked to keep quite and asked my wife not to let her friends dishonesty traits rub off on her. My wife's reaction further concerned me. She defended her friend in such a way it lead to an arguement and felt as if she was on trial. No trial, just me expresing my concern. I have no reason not to trust my wife, but now if she is out with a dishonest friend I would not feel the same.

I do not like this feeling and talking to her about it got us no where. Should I pursue this further? Should I trust her when in this company?

2007-12-02 16:32:39 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

Im married hes 7yrs older than me we have a daughter together.Hes a mamas boy,hes addicted to video games n comuter..He listens to his mom in everything and lets mom do everything for him.He is so damn lazy in everything and just so damn stuborn.If its not hes way then is the hwy. I married him anyway..But now im fed up with everything.We leave in his moms house and other guest mom pays for everything he only pays for 1 or 2 things so everybody leaves rent FREE.The problem is that mom likes to let people stay(specially ex convicts)as longest they want with no obligations what so ever. no rules no 1 helps around d house no 1 brings nothing 2 house.They are use to leaving like that. Her little friends come n do what they like.we have 1 car n he lets any1 use it.Mom is d boss there she does what she pleases.what should i do my husband is never gonna change he will always leave with mom til she dies he will always b lazy.he acts like a child.im gonna end up leving but where.i left all 4him

2007-12-02 16:30:06 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous

go to this link of sharing of wit and wisdom to uplift your spirit and courage:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MkLI2xfIM4A

2007-12-02 16:09:22 · 3 answers · asked by HOPES 5

MY WIFE & I ARE HAVING MARITAL PROBLEMS AFTER HAVING OUR 1ST CHILD, WE LIVE IN AZ, MY WIFE'S PARENTS LIVE IN SPOKANE. WA. MY WIFE LEFT TO VISIT
HER PARENTS ON NOV 2ND, I HAVE JUST RECIEVED NOTICE THAT SHE IS COMING BACK TO AZ TO PICK UP HER STUFF, SHE IS NOT BRINGING MY DAUGHTER WITH HER, IS THAT LEGAL FOR HER TO LEAVE OUR DAUGHTER WITH MY WIFE'S MOM,? MEANWHILE MY DAUGHTER DOESEN'T SEE HER DADDY FOR OVER A MONTH. I GUESS I'M WORRIED THAT I MAY NEVER SEE MY LITTLE GIRL AGAIN.

2007-12-02 16:01:40 · 25 answers · asked by ERIC O 1

I really liked him. I was pretty intoxicated and things escalated. So he lost his erection and we did not have sex which was fine by me. Then he went on a rant about his divorce. Does he still love his ex, they have been divorced over a year?

2007-12-02 15:59:26 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous

We just don't talk to one another this way. We just moved, it's been stressful and he's starting a new job tomorrow. we have had problems with communication since before we were married. But we all have to have boundaries and I just feel I'll have no self-respect left if there isn't some consequence or sincere apology (which is very rare). The heated conversation doesn't even fit the offense. There was definitaly sarcasism by me but no name calling or personal attacks. We've been at a crossroad for awhile now. To the point that the new house is in my name only. I'm only 33 ,1st marriage and he is 44 and has been married prior for 13 years- no kids. We've been married just 3 years. I'm miserable a lot of the time but still love him ...I feel crazy. But I do have enough sence to know you can't be calling you spouse "a piece of ****' . What now?

2007-12-02 15:43:22 · 21 answers · asked by terri j 1

men can answer also.my wife is always tired at night or she says shes not in the mood.is this normal for women this age.she says shes not happy with her self because shes over weight and thats why shes not in the mood.so,you ladies have any answers.

2007-12-02 15:42:36 · 25 answers · asked by titansithlord 2

I am basically the crazy person in my family. Everyone in my fam has done exactly what they're supposed to do and they're successful. Are they happy? No idea. I know i'm not all that happy...i feel like everyone must look at me thinking, wow what happened to her. I was divorced by the time i was 25. NOt sure i'll ever get married and if i do i'm sure the guy wont be good enough for my family. I just have no desire to be just like them..yet i do feel bad about it and wonder if my life would have been easier if i'd travelled the way they did. I'm 29 now. I just feel like i'm not as polished, poised and classy as they all are.

2007-12-02 15:41:54 · 5 answers · asked by mol78 2

I know i'm not going to get married until i'm 18 but my bf proposed to me. I've known him since the 2nd grade and hes a really sweet guy.

2007-12-02 15:38:21 · 27 answers · asked by x 5

Are guys more unhappy with thier marriages over all or gals? What is your guess?

I think it is probably guys?????

2007-12-02 15:29:11 · 29 answers · asked by Praire Crone 7

my husband is very distant,cheated,abused me in the past.he keeps to hiself.has an addiction to computer chat rooms

2007-12-02 15:19:16 · 59 answers · asked by mimi 1

It seems like most of YA's marriage questions are so negitive. Is this a reflection of most people or just the ones who are here on YA?

2007-12-02 14:59:03 · 14 answers · asked by Praire Crone 7

My ex wife slept topless with panties almost every night. When she was mad at me in a rob or with a shirt on. She almost never slept completely naked for some reason. I always thought it would rather be a sort of treat to have her sleep totally nude but she never did. Any ways, how do you ladies do it for your husbands? Do you always sleep one way or another, or do you spice it up as a reward or on special occasions, etc? Also, when you are mad with them do you sleep clothed to punish them?

2007-12-02 14:25:54 · 20 answers · asked by Heart of Stone 3

before u guys chew me up on this one.Let me explain....We were best friends before this.I wasn't happy .I filed for a divorce long before this affair.His wife relly doesn't treat him well.We would sit and talk about our mates.And yes I fell in love.He made me feel like I was somebody.We had this relationship for 2 years.He told me last Sept he was going to tell his wife he was seeing someone & wanted a divorce.And he did..Though all of this he called me 10 & 15 times aday telling me he wanted me in his life And wanted us to raise his daughter together.When he told his wife he wanted the divorce.She told him if he left her he wouldn't even get their daughter on the weekends.He hasn't had sex with the wife in 2 years.And I know thats true{long story dealing with the sex thing} anyways he now calls me and tells me he still loves me & still wants us to be together..But the wife has him over a barrel.Shes really big in her church..Guys what do u think?

2007-12-02 14:15:57 · 35 answers · asked by PATRICIA S 1

i have no job and no money. the kids are realy excited about x-mass but i dont know what to do if i cant get a job.I am bilanual and got my GED but i havent got a a car to get to far. can anyone tell me where i can go to get help for my kids .He left us on December 1 and Im scared they wont have anything from santa.

2007-12-02 14:04:27 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous

I found this posted in a public forum. My husband private messaged it to someone:
"hey i looked at ur profile ur 21 i am 22 my birthday is the 21 of feburary urs is the 23 same as my little sister and ur cute too [three different types of smiley faces]"
It was posted by a friend of the woman who received it. My husband was labeled a douche bag. He responded, in the forum, "may i ask why i am a douche bag? i complimented her. are you her husband? if so i am sorry for sending that. i did not know she was married. i was just trying to be nice."
Now, if he knows it would be wrong to send it if she were married, shouldn't he know it's wrong to send it because -he- is married? He claims he was trying to make peace with her because he was a jerk in the forums, and he "had to start somewhere." How about, "Let's make peace, okay?" Not...we have all this in common and ur cute, smiley smiley. Did he just try to make peace very stupidly or was he trying to hint around and get something started?

2007-12-02 13:06:36 · 41 answers · asked by Amala 1

I want to be unbarred.....I have never done anything abusive to anyone .....except make them upset when they have been abusive and I tell them to behave....I had to boot one from the table

2007-12-02 13:05:26 · 1 answers · asked by kate 1

I am married! and just went for my first appointment to ask for help conceiving a child and he full on hit on me! Saying things like (before he examined me), "well if the inside is anything like the outside of you you'll have nothing to worry about... you're gorgeous" Calling me princess and saying things like, "how often do you and your husband have sex?" and when I said due to him being tired its sometimes only once a week, he says- "My god, if I had you in my house- you'd have to wear a paper bag over your head so I could keep my hands off of you"...
There were other things like that but now i feel nervous and wonder, 'What do I do?' Do I keep going back and ignore him? (I have a follow up appointment in 6 weeks!) or do I cancel and see another one? Do you think I am over reacting?

I can't tell my husband he'll go off his head, he gets jealou easily....
Help!
Thanks for all advice given.

2007-12-02 12:56:57 · 27 answers · asked by Renesme 5

Has been having an affair with my "best" friend for the past 4. We have been together for 12 years, since I was 16 and we have 2 wonderful daughters together. He is deployed right now and even though I confronted him (via email) two weeks ago, he is YET to even call. I am just wondering if there are any good self-help type books that can help me to move on (WITHOUT him...I am not staying with him so none about overcoming it in a marriage) and not become bitter and angry. I have two daughters to think of and I would like to be able to move on and give them a good life.

Thanks in advance.....

2007-12-02 12:55:51 · 19 answers · asked by alk24238 2

Last night my husband and I were invited out for his friend's wifes birthday. When we pulled into the parking lot my husband got a weird look on his face and said, "uh oh Steve is here".
Steve is a friend of the of the birthday couple. Steve is the most ignorant racist man I have ever met. He was so hurtful with his words last time I saw him, I told my husband I would never put myself in a situation were I had to listen to this ignorant man.
Last night I decide to I would stay for a little while then leave. I stayed for an hour. During this hour my husband didn't introduce me to anybody knowing I only knew 3 of the people there. During conversations my husband would turn his back to me leaving me standing out of the conversation. I quietly mention this to him so he brought me a chair so I would be with the rest of the group but he kept standing if front of me with his butt in my face. Finally he left me in the corner with nobody to talk to at this point I went home.

2007-12-02 12:54:53 · 11 answers · asked by Sunny 3

i jerk off
a lot
i do it to pornography
i feel bad sometimes but
when im alone i just cant stop myself
i just get so horny
this question is for guys and girls
is it bad to masturbate

2007-12-02 12:53:37 · 4 answers · asked by domo p 1

I am at the end of my rope w/ my hubby. He is always sick. He is always tired, sniffles, etc. He does have a heart problem but I am beginning to believe he uses it to get attention & out of doing things around the house. He works but on his days off, he does NOTHING around the house. He will work on his ATV, go hunting/fishing/etc. but will not help out with anything in the home. EX - I can not do electrical work (he can) & we have a light switch that has needed switched out for over a year but he keeps putting it off. I need the door to the utility closet cut (put new flooring in 2 years ago & now it is too tight of a fit) but he won't let me use HIS saw and the door is still waiting to be put back on the hinges. I always have to keep going. This week he & I both had a bad cold - my temp hit 102.5 & his was 101. He laid on the couch moaning, I had to cook, do laundry, run errands, etc. He will not follow dr. orders - it is almost like he wants to stay sick. I am tired of this!

2007-12-02 12:50:16 · 6 answers · asked by Love being a Mom 2

Well I have posted a couple other ? on here about my relatship with my husband and all.
Well I do so much for him we will have been married for 3 years and all I cook clean take care of our too babies and lay ouut his clothes and all and going to school to be a wedding planner on top of it all and I am a secretary for my mom's cleaning buisness and all. well He just started showing me affection and all and telling me he loves more offten and holding me and kissing me and he buys me diamonds and all but we ahve not made love in like 2 months and I found a tooth brush in are bath room that is not his and not mine and all and I dont know what to think and all any body have any suggetion please help me I am a very sweet person and all I want is to be loved by my hubby.

2007-12-02 12:46:34 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

I asked him to go to the fair with me and my daughter (who is not his). He said he would go but plans had to be changed cause I had to watch my brother’s kids for a while so since we couldn’t go at the original time he said he wasn’t going with us. He chooses to go to the fair that very night, get drunk and hang with his old girl friend. She brought him home at 3 am completely wasted. Over the next 2 days he tried to convince me to leave him that he was worthless and I could do better. After a week and many tearful moments I told him “this is what I need from you, I need you be a loving and respectful husband and step dad to my daughter” He told me he couldn’t do that. I said fine and moved out. It has been 4 months that I haven’t lived with him during those months he was such a jerk. I told him I needed some time apart to clear my head and become me. He needed to do the same and decide what was important in his life. He took that time to harass me, stalk me, party and constantly ask

2007-12-02 12:43:17 · 17 answers · asked by Katie 3