Marriage & Divorce - 31 August 2007

Who comes first - kids or your spouse? Most people say kids should always come first. But I read this article about this issue and the author says that you should put your spouse first because that way your kids come first automatically, since by putting your spouse first you protect your kids from painful divorce. Meaning if you have a very strong marriage and you deeply in love and you do not neglect your spouse's needs there is a low possibility that you'll divorce. Being married is a lot of work and you have to work on your marriage every single day and pay a lot of attention to your spouse, but some people neglect their spouses for the sake of the kids. The divorce rate in the USA is 50% and 70% for second marriages. What do you think about this idea? Honestly, I do not have children yet, so I do not know what happens when I do.

2007-08-31 04:21:05 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous

I was just wondering, i am still in love with my ex wife we have been divorced about 6 months. I have found several books or programs that say you can get your spouse back! Stop the Divorce! Have them crawl back to you! Are they for real or are they like the "take this pill and your penis will be bigger" type products? Playing to our hopes and dreams?

2007-08-31 04:06:04 · 10 answers · asked by Johnboy 3

My partner, who is in all practical matters my husband, has just been informed that the birth control pills is around 99% effective once again. I explained to him that means that anywhere from 1 in every 100 to 200 women get pregnant while using 'the pill' perfectly, taking it at the exact same time everyday.

I have been urging him to get a vasectomy or at the very least use condoms less grudgingly. I know, condoms sucks. I hate them too and find reduced pleasure, but what is with men and not understanding that pregnancy is worse than reduced sexual pleasure?? I mean, he was there when we went through that unwanted pregnancy! He didn't like it either, but his sex drive leads to illogical decisions that I only made while experience a 'manic' reaction to antidepressants. Men are so easy!!

Are my assumptions correct?

2007-08-31 03:46:48 · 48 answers · asked by skunk pie 5

i someone who likes sex, so now i left the father of my child who is a real sex man, because he does not want to pay my bride price, now i can cope with my sex life, and i don't want ot flirt, should i go to him or else what

2007-08-31 03:41:48 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous

Would you like to have a picky spouse who seeks improvements by pointing out even those things which in your view might be your minor unharmful bad habbits, but he sincerely doesn't want to see them in you, because of his intense love for you.

OR

A one who lets you live your life in your own way, by only focusing on the good aspects of your personality and ignoring anything about you that might make him uncomfortable (or make him judge your personality), because he loves you so much that he doesn't want to let anything enter his mind that might cause a bad impression of you (even though such life might have some minor flaws regarding which you don't really care to give a thought to) ?

2007-08-31 03:40:42 · 4 answers · asked by Isra 1

My ex-gilrfriend and I kept in touch on and off after 3 weeks of breaking up. This last time I spoke with her..she asked me if I was dating?

I told her no, but I met a couple of people but nothing serious. So I asked her the same question, and she told me she was dating. I was hurt.

Later on in the day, I text her and told her it was good speaking with her, but the truth is that I'm talking to a couple of girls, and I am trying to get to know them. And I want to see were it goes. I also told her that I thought it was too soon for us to be sharing our dating agendas...and that I would rather not know that part of her life..I told her I'm glad to know she's doing fine...and good luck with the person she's dating.

I also said even though we are moving on ....that I loved her. Was it right to tell her all this? She hasn't even responded. I feel no response means she doesn't care, and I should have kept this to myself.

2007-08-31 03:39:06 · 25 answers · asked by SunnySideUp 1

yesterday, my fiance and I was stopped at a redlight. I was discussing my day at work, and I talk while using my hands alot. I was actually discussing 3 reasons for something at work, and I was kinda like counting off each one on my hand. well, the light turned green, and when we turned "he said why you wave at him?" I said "huh" well the man next to us thought I had waved and he waved back. My fiance got very angry and accused me of cheating and called me names. even told me to move out the next day. He even slept on the couch. this morning, he called and said he was just saying that it looked like I waved; which i didnt. He finally apoligized after having a night of world war 3. does anyone else experience this? why can't he just understand I didnt wave? its so frustrating!

2007-08-31 03:33:31 · 48 answers · asked by Anonymous

How would you feel if your significant other cheated on you, as well?

Do you see this as karma or payback, sortive?

Does this make you think about your actions or do you feel ok with it?

2007-08-31 03:25:44 · 20 answers · asked by darkening_hope 4

I want her back but she is telling me that she still loves me and I was her first and only true love but she dont want to be with me we have kids together and I feel like we are setting a bad example to them. She is telling me she cares and dont want to hurt me and is sorry for hurting me but she dont want to do anything to stop it she wont try counseling or anything. she feels like I wasnt there for her I admit I wasnt there for her as much as I should have been but I cant change that now. Is it possible to change her mind about me or is it to late? I am wanting to try whatever it takes to get her back but I am just making things worse she says. so what am I to do I am so lost and scared I dont know what to do I truly still love her but she says she dont love me like that but she does love me she says. Why somany mixed signals? please someone help me I am scvared I will never find happiness without her. I am scared my kids wont have a happy life without me and her together?

2007-08-31 03:18:28 · 8 answers · asked by mising her 2

My daughter is now living with me. She is 15 and lived with her Dad from the age of 10 until now. I live with my parents currently.

I tried to enroll her in the school that has bus transport from my parent's house. They redirected her to a school farther away which has no bus transport.

Now, my parents or myself have to pick up her up and drop her off to school each day.

My father was rushed to the hospital yesterday with a stroke. He may not be able to drive immediately and will probably need to take it easy.

My daughter says that this is a sign that she was not supposed to stay here and instead we both should move back in with my e-husband in another state.

She does not like living with my parents and is unhappy about starting at a new school . She also wants an intact family.

I feel bad because now my parents will have to help me out with my daughter and if I was with my ex-husband, she could take the bus. He can be verbally mean and conrolling though.

2007-08-31 03:12:52 · 28 answers · asked by Stareyes 5

I was 19 when I got married but then was 20 when I got divorced. We tried to work it out but I couldn't I could see that things weren't gonna change. He started dating my roommate that he had just met. Now they have a child and are getting married in a month. Am I weird for being jealous?

2007-08-31 03:12:02 · 17 answers · asked by lilperchal 1

My husband and i had a 3 month "separation" in which he was seeing another girl and still seeing me as well. He kept telling me that he was going to break it off with her but didn't do so until about a month ago now. I know that they are over (trust me i know that!) But i am having a hard time trusting him. I question everything he does even though he tells me constantly he is glad that i am home and that he only wants me and he is sorry ect...Any advice on how to help myself trust him? We both really want to make this work and i am driving myself (and probably him too) nuts. Even though he has changed his attitude i still dwell on what he has done in the past. Any advice? And if you don't have something helpful to say---don't respond!!!!!!!

2007-08-31 03:06:56 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

When I don't feel like having sex my husband gets sad and thinks I'm not attracted to him anymore, but it couldn't be further from the truth. Do you men feel like that when your wife doesn't want ot have sex?

2007-08-31 02:56:40 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

I wanted to get married to be at home and start a familiy.We have been married fo a year. My husband is out during the week 4 times, with his friens or at work parties. I have trying to explain that I feel lonely with his actitud, but he just answer "He is never going to change".He think is my responsability to make my own social life.
He wants to have a baby now or he is going to leave me. Is this the only probleme that we have. I m not been happy. Should I change? I m very confuse!!

2007-08-31 02:54:55 · 46 answers · asked by silvia c 1

My husband thinks it should be okay for him to go out drinking at bars and stuff. Is it okay for a married man to go to bars and get drunk? We have a daughter together and I think we should have family time in the evenings after a hard day of work and not seeing each other all day. He doesnt want to go all the time but like on the weekends. And we can't go together because I am not 21 yet (almost though) and also I dont think it would be right for us to go partying when we have a little girl to take care of. Am I being selfish? And he has cheated on me before and I know how he gets when he drinks. But he says I should trust him no matter what because he would never cheat on me again. What should I do?
I am actually starting to think I should be a "good wife" and let him do whatever he wants while I work full time and cook and clean and do every ******* thing myself.

2007-08-31 02:53:58 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

Have you discovered that after you left your abuser that you cannot get a job, because he's called all the jobs on your resume and your references with some kind of lie? Have you discovered that you cannot get help from any local domestic violence entities for similar reasons? I am not sure if he is tracking where I go (violating the order) or if he is having sister or first wife call the places for him?

2007-08-31 02:51:03 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

he loves me a lot and express his desire to marry me i m happy but he is 26 and i am 19 i love him but sometimes i feel like he needs me only physically i like his nature everything i donno why whenever i think abt his wife and child ,it upset me coz i think he may be love his wife morethan me and use me only for fulfilling his physically desires i am in confusion whether i trust on him or not

2007-08-31 02:49:23 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

He cooked dinner for me and just watching his hands handling the pasta and herbs was an instant turn-on for me. We drank wine that he made and that's when I fell in love. Dessert was even sweeter and it had NO calories!!! LOL

I had to share... but my question is, when did you realize you were in love?

2007-08-31 02:45:12 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-08-31 02:41:59 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous

What is something you do for your spouse to show them you still care -- I'm talking about the little things. With so many divorce questions posted on here, I'd like to read some positive. For example I leave my husband notes in his lunchbox.

2007-08-31 02:41:58 · 46 answers · asked by PrincessJ 3

According to you Will it be right to do so ?

2007-08-31 02:31:49 · 16 answers · asked by AUNTY 3

I have what I thought was a good relationship with my ex and his wife. While staying with them my seven year old was scratched by her 18month half brother and neither my ex nor his wife thought to inform me even though I spoke to them often while my daughter was staying with them. The scratches have left very visible and permanent scars on her face and while I understand kids will be kids I can not understand how an 18month year old can be that vicious. I am also upset that I was not told but I do not want to sound petty by pointing this out.

2007-08-31 02:29:52 · 19 answers · asked by Fultrama10913 1

I think that people get married for different reasons: Love, friendship, companionship, teamwork, etc.

My potential would be a very loyal wife and a fantastic mother. Is that a good enough reason to marry her, or should I hold out for love, friendship, etc.?

2007-08-31 02:28:22 · 35 answers · asked by Shark with a Fricken Laserbeam 3

To Recap:

She had been talking to an older guy who was supposedly just a friend, behind my back. There were 131 calls in one month and they waited till I was at work I only found out when I looked at her cell phone bill. She kept it online but I printed it out.

She had earlier agreed not to talk to him because he tried to feel her up when she had been drinking, he bought her the drinks.

When I gave her an ultimatum it's him or me she begged me to forgive her and said she would never talk to him again.

Should I trust her or continue to monitor her phone calls and movements?

2007-08-31 02:22:42 · 32 answers · asked by PokerPlayer 2

2007-08-31 02:01:13 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

wat will u do if u r X GF or X BF arrives in u r marraige..........

2007-08-31 01:59:29 · 16 answers · asked by Asif khan 2

2007-08-31 01:56:46 · 4 answers · asked by mam1451677 1

my wife very shy person sometime she does as i say but some time she just............................ and when i start i feel that i am hurting her

2007-08-31 01:55:33 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-08-31 01:32:09 · 21 answers · asked by Looking Forward 1

Do you watch games with your signicant other or are you the only fan in house. Who's the biggest fan?

2007-08-31 01:24:15 · 21 answers · asked by Market Magician 3