Family - December 2007

I've lived in the same foster home since I was 5. Got adopted at 11 and now I'm going to be 20 in a few months. My adoptive brother just died and I took it hard. Harder than his own flesh and blood. As much as I wish I was blood, the fact is I'm not. I may have just been that kid who stayed at his Mom's house for all I know. I couldn't step foot inside his house. I started crying so hard. His father was there too (his ex wife adopted me so I'm not his kid). After I started to cry, his dad told me something that really made me think. He said that I may have been close his son but I wasn't nearly as tight with him as he was. I know it's true. But it made me feel like crap. At the funeral last month, I felt strange riding in the limo. I was up there and his blood relatives weren't. I felt strange and out of place like I had no right. I even said something during the funeral. I said he was like a father to me and I think it upset his Father.

2007-12-06 06:14:42 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

What can I do?
I have 2 kids one whose 5,the other 7 and they both have a big list of presents.
But I can't afford to buy any of those presents or any christmas food.
I can only just about normal food.
I can't let them down but I have no way out-please help!
We have no family or friends to help out or anything

2007-12-06 05:58:39 · 47 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband and I have been through some rough times in the past year or so, and we have been separated twice. I love him with all of my heart, and I don't want to lose him. My parents think that because of all the problems that we have been having I should leave him and live with them. When we got back together this last time they told me that I was disowned from the family and never welcome at their house ever again. I can't believe the way they are acting. What should I do????

2007-12-06 05:52:03 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

...here where I live. I have been offered a job in Wisconsin that promises to be a career starter and will allow me to come back to California after 9 months of training. My son is in Kindergarten right now and it would me he would have to change schools mid-year. Is this a bad thing to move him mid year and should I not take the job because how it might affect him? He is very social and intellegent and I don't foresee any issues adjusting, and we would be able to come back to where we currently live after the summer vacation as I will be able to telecommute with the new job. Is this a bad move?

2007-12-06 05:07:53 · 2 answers · asked by MeMyselfandI 1

My husband and I bought a new house 5 months ago, and we want to host Christmas in our house this year and let our 2 year old daughter enjoy Christmas here without traveling. We invited the in-laws down for a long visit, and there shouldn't be a problem because they stayed here at least 6 or 7 times this summer. We insist that Christmas Eve and Christmas morning be in our home (because Santa brings our daughter's presents here, not to Grandma's). MIL suddenly decides this isn't good enough and wants us to drive 4 hours out of state to her house for Christmas, even though my husband and I both have to work and our 2 year old daughter is going to be miserable stuck in a car that long on Christmas Day. MIL is crying and guilt tripping my husband about it so much that he is actually sick with nerves and avoiding the phone! Is it so unreasonable to want to host Christmas in our own house, and make the grandparents come to us???? How should we deal with this?

2007-12-06 04:24:23 · 21 answers · asked by Jacqueline D 4

ok a little back ground. i got divorced 4 years ago. at the time i was a wreck so i gave full custody of our son to the ex. but mow im worried he maybe being neglected with her. she lives with a guy who she has another child with but there are no longer a couple. yet this guy is the one who watches my kid most of the time, and he is a drunk. this guys brother is also living with them now and im told he also does drugs. this all really bothers me. not only that but he almost never sees his mom. he is in school then his mom works at night, and i have him almost every weekend. In fact the last weekend she was suppose to have our son, she left him with the guy shes living with and went out of state for a booty call. i cant say he is in physical danger but i dont feel that hes being taken care of that well either. i cant afford a layer is there anything i can do?

2007-12-06 04:01:37 · 3 answers · asked by jedidiaha 3

My fiance and I live together and until about 3wks ago he was making more then double then me and the primary support for us (thogether we just barly made enough to get by) Now he lost his job Ive picked up some hours, but not enough to live off of, we sold some investments I had and that money is now half way gone. Hes at home feeling sorry for himself and everytime I get worried or upset and talk to him about it he doesnt want to talk abotu it or trys to make me think hes trying hard to find work. There are not many jobs, but I feel like instead of maybe applying for 1 or 2 jobs a day online he should be applying for lots and out driving around filling out apps. I dont want him to get mad at me or give up but he needs motivation because we have a house and car loans to pay for, with the economy so bad it may be really tough to find work even if he does try super hard, How do I motivate him???

2007-12-06 03:59:00 · 13 answers · asked by sarah 5

had, finally the last 8 yrs. have taken its toll, and I have been diagnosed with dengeneration of the spine, a hernia, fractured knee, and menopause, I have been single, and I all got to me and I decided it was time to make a change, I decided to move south and the problem is I have a grandson that worships me and it broke my heart having to leave, the thing is my daughter, my mother, and all my family are angry at me for leaving, but none of them care to hear why? so now I am considered the bad person, and it had torn me to shreds to leave, but am I wrong?

2007-12-06 02:48:21 · 11 answers · asked by kathleenhorn55 1

This is my issue I don't want my daughter to drive, she is 16, for the sole reason of liability. As much as I trust her I can't get past knowing whatever "she" does I'm responsible for. All it would take is 1 mistake while with friends and my wife and I could pay the price forever. 20 years ago I wouldn't be having this probem, but with our ultra sue happy society it's just 1 lawsuit away from financial ruin. I think of Nick Hogan's recent accident and the multi million $$ lawsuit that is soon to be filed. Locally a 16 yr old "boy" hit a guy on a bike the judgement was over 190k. Do you guys think about this or not?

2007-12-06 02:45:19 · 9 answers · asked by Lovemykids 1

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/skynews/20071206/tuk-teen-kills-hamster-in-freezer-dryer-45dbed5.html

2007-12-06 02:43:42 · 44 answers · asked by Anonymous

My husband's parents always have a Christmas party just for adults during the Holiday season. They have many other activities that the children are all welcome to, but this one night is just for adults - family and friends. Last year, there was a big blowup because my husband's stepbrother shows up with his wife and their 2 kids. Other people were upset because they didn't get to come because they had no one to watch their kids, or they came and didn't bring their kids and were upset that they couldn't have brought them. This stepbrother is the "golden boy" - my husband's stepdad's favorite.....He shows up to Thanksgiving dinner in shorts....the rules don't seem to apply to him or his family.....His daughter is a tyrant...

Well, this year, we get told the night before the party that we are not invited because of the kids......we completely understood and were not offended...

2007-12-06 02:24:18 · 6 answers · asked by Emmy F 3

I have been married for 6 years. My husband and I have 3 children, two of whom are very young. Every holiday we have a problem with my in-laws "planning" our day for us and not discussing the plans with us so we can have input. At Thanksgiving, my mother-in-law called and invited us and my parents/brother to dinner at her house. I thanked her for the invitation but indicated that I did not think my parents and brother would be comfortable with that arrangement and then invited them (all of them...mother-in-law, father-in-law, sister-in-law, brother-in-law and nephew) to celebrate with us at our house. I thought everyone would be more comfortable with that. She did not answer and said we would discuss it later. We never discussed it. A few days before Thanksgiving, she informed me that dinner would be at 1:00 and that she had already done the grocery shopping. Then she was offended when my parents declined her invitation and we cooked a separate dinner at my house. Christmas, the same.

2007-12-06 02:06:08 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

No sexual abuse involved at all. But after an argument why would someone just never take your calls again (on one side) or throw their hands up and say I've just had enough and never want to have a relationship with their mom, son, daughter, or family again?

This has to be for an extended amount of time.

What are your reasons?

2007-12-06 01:59:34 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

like from the influences of our society 2007?

2007-12-06 01:44:51 · 6 answers · asked by Gypsy Gal 6

Here's the deal, if you significant other was away (like a 7 hour drive) visiting her family and he/she took her son to his father's for a visit, would it be too much to ask him/her to meet in a public place ? I just think it's a boundary that shouldn't be crossed. My son's father who hasn't been in this child's life for 2 years(he's four) and my wife just happened to drop him a line and told him she would bring him up for a visit, and they were there alone for a half hour. And then when I asked her what she was into on the phone she told me she was visiting a friend(girl friend). Not until the next day did she inform me she was at Dave's. I am very hurt over this and she says it is unjustified. I feel that she should have NOT been in this guy's house alone with him. Am I wrong ?

2007-12-06 01:40:10 · 9 answers · asked by Jayson L 2

2007-12-06 01:15:32 · 9 answers · asked by Jasmine 5

Well me and my boy friend are thinkin about having a baby, but we are still in skool, and I'm only 17 and he's 19. We're was going to move n together but I have to take care of my mother, even me, my mother, and him are talkin about this baby. We both have jodz,he already have the place that we're going to move in, he's still in college, and I have a year left of skool. I don't what to do.

2007-12-06 00:32:29 · 23 answers · asked by toosexy_fo_u 1

2007-12-06 00:10:43 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

Our 5 year old son was sexually abused by a 14 year old Foster Daughter at his Father's new wife's home, with our 4 year old daughter watching. I am fighting for Legal and Physical Custody of our children, and their Father wants overnight visits in his home every other weekend, alternating Holiday's, etc, with the "promise" that the 14 year old girl will not be present.

I feel this is unacceptable, that the "place" will be associated with the "act" and will be detrimental to our children's mental and emotional well being. Our children have both recently started Therapy at Children's Hospital.

I am taking any and every legal avenue to protect them. Does anyone have any similar experience or suggestions?

2007-12-06 00:09:09 · 9 answers · asked by Susan 4

My mother has heard horror stories about nursing homes. Her hairdresser said she has to go every evening to feed her mother as the staff doesn't have time. Some friends said the more visitors you have the better care you get. Another person told her if you always have candy or cookies to pass out to the staff they come in your room more often to "check on you". Mom is afraid that when the time comes she will be neglated or abused. How do we answer her? The few visits we've had to different homes we've seen people sitting around in chairs staring at walls or appearing to be doped up.

2007-12-05 23:42:14 · 6 answers · asked by twin_fawn_acres 2

my mom said i am mean because im not spending much on my daughter this xmas because she has lost 3 mobil phones i have brought 4 her .i warned her that if she lost the last 1 she would have the value deducted from her xmas money...iv done it caus i think she has 2 learn that it all costs me money.........i feel bad but feel i have 2 stick 2 my guns........so what do you think?.......and my daughter is 10!

2007-12-05 23:39:15 · 36 answers · asked by me&my girl 1

Okay, this is an extension to an earlier question.
Some background: I'm 22 years old and after I finished college, I started working at a newspaper in my home town. The rule in my home is that you do not move out unless you're married or working in another town/city. So now I'm staying at my parent's house. I feel this is the best until I find my feet. I've already applied for other jobs in another city. This shows my need to get out of my parents' house. My sister is 6 years older than me. She has a great job and an even better salary.
Now the problem: She's also still staying at my parents's house. She refuses to leave!!! I mean, I can't wait to get out, and she wants to stay there. And that's not all. She earns almost three times the amount I am, but she's forever borrowing money from my mom. AND... never pays back!!! How can I kick her out of the nest without hurting her feelings... or her butt.

2007-12-05 23:36:29 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous

Everytime I have a problem with school or with a boyfriend, I've never been able to talk to my mom. Honestly, I think it's easier to talk to a complete stranger. I can go to her crying and asking for advice and either a.) She walks away, shaking her head or b.) says "Christina, What exactly do you expect me to do about it.?" My mom has never been the one to "show" love, but she provides us with the things we need so I guess I shouldn't complain, but there is so many things that I have concerns about and I know she is busy with four kids and two jobs. She does make me feel like one less kid (me) might make it easier. I'm 16 and I do have another place to stay, but she keeps me around for who-knows-what. I'm not whining but I feel like I'm in the way like a problem child. <--( whole different subject itself).. I just don't know what to do anymore, I have gave up trying to talk to her.

2007-12-05 22:43:08 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

I always get her perfumes/bath and body stuff and I want to get something else. Something unique or creative maybe? I'm on a college student budget...up to $40-ish dollars maybe. Any good ideas?

2007-12-05 22:39:56 · 11 answers · asked by Nole't 1

We are three children. My sis, the eldest, is 28 years old and my brother is two years younger than me, making him 20. From an early age, I have learnt to share everything with my bro. We were kind of brought up as twins - being treated equally. But he was just spoiled more, being my parents' only son and the youngest to boot. That has never been a problem for my sis and I and we spoiled him also. However, recently things have changed. He always gets his way, whether it's my car, money or just the tv. When we complained to my parents, they tried to punish him if he forces his way. But I fear it was in vain. He just continues doing what he wants. Now they have started to emotionally punish him, calling him names and stuff, and my sis also participates in this. I've tried the reasonal approach but nothing seems to work.
Please help

2007-12-05 22:27:36 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous

My mom is coming over and she will see our new T.V. . She will have nothing but snotty remarks about the t.v. and anything else we would buy that she doesn't feel is important. How do I handle this ..Tactfully when I am almost 30 years old ..even if she doesn't say anything right away she will bring it up later or sigh and roll her eyes!!!

2007-12-05 21:56:18 · 9 answers · asked by halburg 1

2007-12-05 21:38:44 · 2 answers · asked by gobra3 1

My father passed away about 2 weeks ago (Nov. 20th). He was divorced from my mother for many years and was married for almost 10 years to my stepmother.
Unfortunately, I did not have the opportunity to get to know her very well because she and my father lived in another state.
I know about her but I don't really know her, I also know that she and my father were very much in love.
I don't think that I can ignore her, because after 10 years of marriage to my father, she is a member of my family.
On the other hand, doesn't "until death do you part" mean anything?
My question is should I make the effort to develop a relationship with her?

2007-12-05 21:15:48 · 10 answers · asked by Eric W 2

I've had so much crap go on in my life. I've tried killing myself, i have so many scars down my arm cause i cut myself so much. I don't no why. My parents are divorced, and my mum completly hates my, im 15 and don't have any family in Australia so i cant go anywere from home. I don't have many friends or a boyfriend that i can share my problems with. I don't like counselers, and i don't want proffesional help. I just want to change my life around and be happy, i don't want to go to bed every night crying, but how? How do i change my life to something i will want to live for?

2007-12-05 20:56:51 · 25 answers · asked by cOOkies.... 2

I'll try to get right to the point, but there is a lot involved. Me and my sister have always been close. She is 1 1/2 yrs. younger. She has twin 4 yr. old girls who I have a tremendously close relationship with. My sister and I got in a fight, and now she isn't speaking to me. This is fine with me, but apparently, I'm not able to see my nieces. I consider this emotional blackmail and I'm not sure how to deal with it. She has done this in the past when the girls were babies, and I literally cried every night because I missed them so bad. After a couple months, she finally contacted me to make up. After the second time she did it, she promised she would never use her kids like that again, (she admitted she used them to get to me, & it's the only way she can). I'm not surprised it's happening again, but it still hurts because the girls & I are so close. I feel she was in the wrong in this fight, so I won't give in. How would you handle it? I am open to all suggestions.

2007-12-05 20:51:10 · 4 answers · asked by calimari 2