Jokes & Riddles - December 2006

What would you do if someone was telling you a knock-knock joke but after you said "who's there", they dropped dead, I know it seems insensitive but wouldn't you always wonder who was there?

2006-12-05 14:34:53 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

Dogs are known for being loyal !

2006-12-05 14:33:56 · 24 answers · asked by DumBlonD 4

I've heard about that, weird....... but I have curiosity

2006-12-05 14:33:14 · 13 answers · asked by Love Yahoo!!! wannabe a princess 4

Who knows what that is 10 points 2 the first person who gets it

2006-12-05 14:31:34 · 10 answers · asked by KatieJay 2

There's many ways to interpret this question, but I want you to use your imagination to answer.

2006-12-05 14:30:40 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

Ive lost mine

2006-12-05 14:25:15 · 21 answers · asked by elephants_foot29 1

2006-12-05 14:22:14 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous

That chuck Norris was actually the cause of the "big bang"
That Chuck Norris went to the Virgin Islands, but now they are just the islands.
That chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits...
That the boogie man checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
That chuck Norris doesn't get wet, water gets chuck norris.

But other than that he's just a normal human being...

2006-12-05 14:17:13 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-12-05 14:14:15 · 6 answers · asked by Jasmine C 1

What's the difference between a jeweler and a jailer?

2006-12-05 14:03:49 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

I can ugly or purtty it depends on who in front of me. I can be as bright as the sun or as dull as the dark.Girls ues me more than boys.I mack you see thing backwareds.i can blinde you and no matter where i am some peaple love to shot Mary at me.

2006-12-05 13:59:56 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous

I got this off the internet


How quickly can you find out what is unusual about this paragraph? It looks so ordinary that you would think that nothing was wrong with it at all, and in fact, nothing is. But it is unusual. Why? If you study it and think about it you may find out, but I am not going to assist you in any way. You must do it without coaching. No doubt if you work at it for long, it will dawn on you. I don't know. Now, go to work and try your luck.

2006-12-05 13:56:53 · 17 answers · asked by Frank 3

okay tell me if this is scary. i think it is. i had to sleep wit my mom after hearing this story beware:

k, so i was going to bed and i put my blankets over me and was going to go to sleep when i felt somethin nibble on my toes. i just shook it off. later i felt the nibbling again. this time i looked at my toe and it was half eaten!! i looked at the bottom of my bed to see who was nibbling at my toe and i saw it!! it was the toenibbler!!!i know this is scary but its true and its okay if you have to sleep wit ur mom. but the toenibbler is alive and he might nibble your toes off so watch out!!!if you think this is scary tell me.and no you cant ward off the toenibbler by wearing socks.

2006-12-05 13:50:41 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

Of no use to one
Yet absolute bliss to two.
The small boy gets it for nothing.
The young man has to lie for it.
The old man has to buy it.
The baby's right,
The lover's privilege,
The hypocrite's mask.
To the young girl, faith;
To the married woman, hope;
To the old maid, charity.

What am I?

2006-12-05 13:49:34 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

I have a doctors appointment tomorrow (Nurse does it I guess) and I have to get a shot in my a**.

Does it hurt? What's it like?

Also how is it given (Ie: What's the procedure like)? Standing or laying, etc.?

2006-12-05 13:45:51 · 7 answers · asked by Dude 1

One night a guy took his girlfriend home. As they were about to wish each other goodnight at the front door, the guy started feeling a little in the mood.

With an air of confidence, he leaned with his hand against the wall and smiling, he said to her "Honey, would you give me a kiss?"

Horrified, she replied, "Are you mad? My parents will see us!"

"Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?" He asked grinning at her.

"No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?"

"Oh come on! There's nobody around, they're all sleeping!".

"No way. It's just too risky!"

"Oh please, please, I love you so much?!?"

"No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can't!".

"Oh yes you can. Please?"....................



"No, no. I just can't"



"I'm begging you .. "





Out of the blue, the light on the stairs went on, and the girl's older sister showed up in her pajamas, hair disheveled, and in a sleepy voice she said,



"Dad says to go ahead and give him a kiss, or I can do it. Or if need be, mom says she can come down herself and do it, but for God's sake and all of ours....

"TELL HIM TO TAKE HIS HAND OFF THE DOOR BELL!!"

2006-12-05 13:45:16 · 18 answers · asked by ☺•˚ºo(█?) 2

sorry, try typing in or go to
http://www.cafeoflifepikespeak.com/Videos/Licensed%20To%20Pill.swf

2006-12-05 13:24:50 · 7 answers · asked by bluidjwl2 2

thanks Tim for your answer
and you Joe

2006-12-05 13:23:10 · 14 answers · asked by sam 1

2006-12-05 13:17:30 · 10 answers · asked by Jasmine C 1

Little Johnny walks into his mothers room and hears the word SH*T! Johnny askes "What does that mean?" his mother says " Oh that means putting on makeup"
Little Johnny walkes into his two brothers room, they were fighting and calling each other d*cks and p*ssys Johnny askes "what does that mean" and they said "it means hats and coats"

Little Johnney walks into the kitchen and he hears the word F*CK!


Johnny askes his dad "what does that mean" his dad says it means"stuffing the turkey"
then there was a knock on the door. Johnny opens it . his aunt and uncle were there. Johnny says to them " here let me take your d*cks and p*ssys, moms upstairs putting sh*t on her face and dad's in the kitchen F*cking the turkey!

2006-12-05 13:16:00 · 16 answers · asked by Orion M 3

2006-12-05 13:03:29 · 10 answers · asked by yo-yo 3

i need a couple of good jokes.lets see who has the funniest one!!

2006-12-05 12:52:32 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

If so, what is your favorite song by them? Does not have to be on their recent album. And, if you have a favorite from their 1st album "Your Favorite Weapon" don't be shy or embarrassed to say, I love them all !!

2006-12-05 12:41:16 · 13 answers · asked by Just a girl 2

and had to buy another one by 2pm.

2006-12-05 12:41:13 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

theres a kid at my school who is white trash and has a trailer in his back yard and i was wondering if anyone had any trailer jokes

2006-12-05 12:35:54 · 6 answers · asked by matt 3

Phone rings. JEWISH MOTHER picks up the phone and answers

Jewish Mother
Hello?

Daughter
Hi Mom. Can I leave the kids with you tonight?

Jewish Mother
You're going out?

Daughter
Yes.

Jewish Mother
With whom?

Daughter
With a friend.

Jewish Mother
I don't know why you left your husband. He is such a good man.

Daughter
I didn't leave him. He left me!

Jewish Mother
You let him leave you, and now you go out with anybodies and nobodies.

Daughter
I do not go out with anybody. Can I bring over the kids?

Je wish Mother
I never left you to go out with anybody except your father.

Daughter
There are lots of things that you did and I don't.

Jewish Mother
What are you hinting at?

Daughter
Nothing. I just want to know if I can bring the kids over tonight.

Jewish Mother
You're going to stay the night with him? What will your husband say if he finds out?

Daughter
My EX husband. I don't think he would be bothered. From the day he left me, he probably never slept alone!

Jewish Mother
So you're going to sleep over at this loser's place?

Daughter
He's not a loser.

Jewish Mother
A man who goes out with a divorced woman with children is a loser and a parasite.

Daughter
I don't want to argue. Should I bring over the kids or not?

Jewish Mother
Poor children with such a mother.

Daughter
Such a what?

Jewish Mother
With no stability. No wonder your husband left you.

Daughte r
ENOUGH!!!

Jewish Mother
Don't scream at me. You probably scream at this loser too!

Daughter
Now you're worried about the loser?

Jewish Mother
Ah, so you see he's a loser. I spotted him immediately.

Daughter
Goodbye, mother.

Jewish Mother
Wait! Don't hang up! When are you bringing them over?

Daughter
I'm not bringing them over! I'm not going out!

Jewish Mother
If you never go out, how do you expect to meet anyone?

2006-12-05 12:20:24 · 10 answers · asked by nydiva28 3

If u stacked each grain cube by cube?

2006-12-05 12:16:44 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

The 1st was for himself
The 2nd was for his country
The 3rd was for his friend
WHO AM I

2006-12-05 12:16:03 · 16 answers · asked by colin050659 6

One day and old lady got pulled over by a blonde police driver. The police officer says," May i see an ID?" The the old lady pulls out a mirror and gives it to the police officer. The police officer says," ma'am if i would've known you were a police officer, i wouldn't have pulled you over." That is the best blonde joke ever!!!

2006-12-05 12:15:58 · 23 answers · asked by Krista 2

A father asks his young son what would he like for Xmas. The lad can't make up his mind, and tells his dad that he'll think about it. He then goes to bed that noght and he's thinking what he would like for Xmas. Suddenly he realises what he wants, and rushes into his parents bedroom. His parents are having sex,but his father looks up and asks him what does he want. I want a watch Dad, If thats okay with you, he says. Well okay son , but keep still and don't tell your sister about it, or you won't have anything for Xmas.

2006-12-05 12:14:29 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous