Jokes & Riddles - July 2006

A woman was getting ready to take a shower one day.. and her 5yr old son asked if he could take one with her. She said "yes but just don't look down." So they get in the shower and of course the little boy looks down. He says, "mommy, what's that?" She replies, "my little black sponge." So they get out of the shower and the little boy sees him mom fully clothed. He says, "Mommy, what happened to your little black sponge?" So just to get him to drop the subject she tells him, "I lost it." So he tells her that he'll go look for it.

A few minutes later the little boy comes back and says, "Mommy I found your little black sponge. The neighbor lady is washing daddy's face with it!"

Moral: Stay in school!

2006-07-21 16:27:44 · 8 answers · asked by PseudoQuasiX 3

2006-07-21 16:16:33 · 10 answers · asked by archimedes_crew 3

There's a little fellow named Junior who hangs out at
Tim Alley's Grocery Store. The owner Tim doesn't know what
Junior's problem is, but the boys like to tease him. They
say he's two bricks shy of a load, or two pickles shy of a
barrel. To prove it, sometimes they offer Junior his choice
between a nickel and a dime. He always takes the nickel.
One day, after Junior grabbed the nickel, Tim got him off to
one side and said, "Junior, those boys are making fun of you.
They think you don't know the dime is worth more than the nickel.
Are you grabbing the nickel because it's bigger, or what?"
Junior said, "No...it's cuz, if I took the dime, they'd quit
doing it!"

2006-07-21 16:14:16 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

Some say yes some say no.Whats your opinion?

2006-07-21 16:10:50 · 19 answers · asked by curious_john 3

a talking fish,a unicorn,a dragon and a smart blond

2006-07-21 16:10:09 · 18 answers · asked by reddfam75043 1

little timmy came up to his father and said, "dad, susie saays i'm dumb, but she doesn't even know how to eat a hot dog. what should i do?"

timmy's dad says, "timmy, you tell susie to 'bite the weenie.'"

2006-07-21 16:04:58 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

Little Johnny's kindergarden class was on a field trip to
their local police station where they saw pictures, tacked
to a bulletin board, of the 10 most wanted men.
One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it
really was the photo of a wanted person.
"Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want him very
badly."
Little Johnny asked, "So, why didn't you keep him when you
took his picture?"

2006-07-21 16:03:47 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-21 15:58:18 · 12 answers · asked by ? 6

how many are left

if you don't get this your retarded

2006-07-21 15:57:59 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

how many are left

if yo don't get this your retarded

2006-07-21 15:57:31 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

There are four brothers in this world that were all born together. The first runs and never wearies. The second eats and is never full. The third drinks and is always thirsty. The fourth sings a song which is never good.

2006-07-21 15:57:06 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

their are three triplets in the back all identical
one gets out and robs a store how did the police capture the right one

2006-07-21 15:56:00 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

not literally speaking, just enjoyable to be around. i am always too serious. do you know any good jokes?? Not like the lame ones, like knock knock ones. like you are in a senario and you whisper to your friends something that makes them giggle. and please don't give me that talk about u are good the way u are, people enjoy you for being you. i don't want someone telling me that, when i have to start the year off like that. last year people thought of me as that know-it-all smart geeky girl with zits. i wanna start my next year off, and be enjoyable. so please give me some senarios, and some funny little jokes! Please?? nothing inappropiate, like guys make fun of a girl some way, like sarcastic funny remarks to tell my other friends, and yes i am a girl. Even if i meet a cute guy, i won't know what to say, so please help!! I AM SO DESPERATE!

2006-07-21 15:46:33 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous 1

http://www.flowgo.com/index.cfm?action=view&id=9715&scid=0

2006-07-21 15:41:00 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

Dies half its life,
lives the rest.
Dances without music,
breathes without breath.

2006-07-21 15:35:51 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-21 15:35:18 · 15 answers · asked by miho9000 3

the one that grosses me out the most will get10 pts! its that easy.
now bring it people

2006-07-21 15:31:57 · 21 answers · asked by §gorda§ 3

cause i am clueless

2006-07-21 15:31:02 · 7 answers · asked by Alli 1

2006-07-21 15:28:56 · 17 answers · asked by Yoro 3

Tell me the funniest joke you have ever heard or made up. The funniest one gets ten points.

2006-07-21 15:28:02 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

I want to know how smart you people are. Or not ignorant rather. You should be able to figure it out.

2006-07-21 15:26:50 · 3 answers · asked by Golgo-13 2

The ________ doctor was ________ to do an operation because there was _______ in the operation theatre. Same word fits all 3 spaces.

2006-07-21 15:06:48 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

for the person i picked

2006-07-21 14:46:17 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-21 14:37:12 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-21 14:32:11 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

What is more powerful than God
More evil then satin
The Rich Need It
The Poor Have It
and If You Eat it You Will Die?

2006-07-21 14:14:25 · 18 answers · asked by Mervin McGee 2

2006-07-21 13:56:16 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-21 13:51:48 · 9 answers · asked by Dee 2

My Nigel not, told me this one
Woman passenger on railway station steps on I talk you weight machine.
You weigh 63 kilos and your train is due in two minutes.
She steps on it again.
You weigh 57 kilos and your train is due in 30 seconds
She steps on it again
You weigh 50 kilos and your train has just left.

2006-07-21 13:44:48 · 8 answers · asked by Harriet 5

or get shocked with a cardiac defibrillator while awake?

2006-07-21 13:40:57 · 16 answers · asked by davidgherron 1