Jokes & Riddles - July 2006

I m sofa king we todd did

keep saying it out loud till you get it! lol

2006-07-21 23:18:11 · 12 answers · asked by mamagooseof7 2

Milk N' Cookies 'fore I go to sleep?

Please?

2006-07-21 22:42:00 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-21 22:37:00 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-21 22:36:11 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-21 22:35:39 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

My cat - a nortorious creature of ill deed and wicked intent - has the irritating habit of humming quietly to himself. When I tell him to stop he says he wasn't aware he was doing it and then, after a short pause, continues. I'm sure he only does it because he knows it infuriates me so.

2006-07-21 22:33:55 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

1 - say 'yes'
2 - say 'no'
3 - say 'aaaaaarrggghhh-hup-heeeeeeeeee-whoooooooooooo'
4 - think you're a yo-yo
5 - suddenly remember a boy at school stealing the charm out of your lucky bag when you were six years old and weep inconsolably

2006-07-21 22:30:15 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

There'd be no rhythm, no humor, no dunks, no sexiness, no Jazz, no swagger and no Michael Jackson..

Alright, Scratch Michael Jackson.

The world'd be like a bunch of pale mofos walking around saying "good day, mate"..

Hot damn...So do y'all love us now?

night night, peace to everybody.

2006-07-21 22:26:52 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

for example
the internet makes you stupid and,
for everything you can think of there is p0rn of it.

2006-07-21 22:24:30 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous

f(x) = 2sin x - 1 , find max and min f(x).

2006-07-21 22:21:09 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

10 points for the correct answer within 10 mts!

2006-07-21 22:04:50 · 8 answers · asked by easyboy 4

i am feeling hot should i lock myself in the refrigerator ?

2006-07-21 21:59:33 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

As allegations and accusations fly following the publication of photographs taken by servicemembers in The New Yorker magazine depicting abuse of Iraqi prisoners in Iraq's notorious Abu Ghraib prison, (including keeping prisoners naked and forcing them to perform simulated and real sex acts) one thing is abundantly clear. When you train troops to lie about sexuality and look the other way rather than confront reality, you get nothing more than confused troops and mixed messages. "Don't Ask" what we do in interrogations, and we "Won't Tell". -- May 2, 2004

Who's Your Baghdaddy?

http://annoy.com/postcards/index.html?CategoryID=16&PageNum=2

2006-07-21 21:52:55 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

the funniest one will get 10 points!

2006-07-21 21:45:37 · 14 answers · asked by Rachana K 1

Make me laugh!!!
A joke, riddle, puzzle or brain tickler. etc.

2006-07-21 21:41:08 · 11 answers · asked by Lizard 3

Yahoo says that I can't answer MY OWN question!!!
What do you think???

2006-07-21 21:30:52 · 20 answers · asked by Trust_in_myself 2

2006-07-21 20:49:08 · 15 answers · asked by nl_leo 1

Four expectant fathers were in a Minneapolis hospital waiting room, while their wives were in labour.

The nurse tells the first man, "Congratulations! You're the father of twins!"

"What a coincidence! I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team!"

The nurse returns and tells the second man, "You are the father of triplets!"

"Wow, what a coincidence! I work for 3M Corporation!"

When the nurse tells the third man that his wife has given birth to quadruplets.

"Another coincidence! I work for Four Seasons Hotel!"

At this point, the fourth guy faints. When he comes to, the others ask what's wrong.

"What's wrong?! I work for Seven-Up!"

2006-07-21 20:19:04 · 12 answers · asked by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7

♥

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her
shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over
which one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife gives up,
quickly wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs.

When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.
Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that
towel that you have on."

After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands
naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her 800 dollars
and leaves. Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman
wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.

When she gets back to the bathroom, her husband asks from the shower,
"Who was that?"

"It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.

"Great!" the husband says, "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"

Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to
credit and risk in time with your stakeholders, you may be in a
position to prevent avoidable exposure.

2006-07-21 20:07:32 · 10 answers · asked by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with
four young mothers and their small children. "You all have obsessions," he observed.

To the first mother:
Mary, he said, "You are obsessed with eating...
You've even named your daughter Candy."

He turned to the second Mom:
Ann, "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."

He turned to the third Mom:
Joyce, "Your obsession is alcohol.
This too shows itself in your child's name, Brandy."

At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, quietly got up, took her
little boy by the hand and whispered, "Come on, Dick, we're leaving."

2006-07-21 20:06:46 · 32 answers · asked by ~p♥kes~ 5

the Kitten? She said I gotta be smooth with it. I mean I do like animals but I like dogs better.

What, y'all thought I was talking 'bout that nasty stuff?

Y'all crazy.

2006-07-21 19:57:52 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was doing pretty well, but he was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his watermelon patch at night and eat his watermelons. After some careful thought, he came up with a clever idea that he thought would scare the kids away for sure.

He made up a sign and posted it in the field. The next night, the kids showed up and they saw the sign which read, "Warning! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide."

The kids ran off, made up their own sign and posted it next to the farmer's sign. When the farmer returned, he surveyed the field. He noticed that no watermelons were missing, but the sign next to his read, "Now there are two!"


that must really suck lol ♥

2006-07-21 19:54:36 · 18 answers · asked by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7

How many of each animal did moses take on the ark?

guess guess guess ♥

2006-07-21 19:52:28 · 8 answers · asked by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7

would you like to see a great joke website???
goto http://www.jokes4ever.co.uk
please let me know what you think?

2006-07-21 19:46:11 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-21 19:35:09 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

no offense to blondes, my daughters and best friend are blonde and we have a lot of fun with these jokes. =)

blessings,
lily

2006-07-21 19:34:46 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

Well before you tell me heres a funny question
If mexico tried to build a spaceship would it just be a big trash can with fireworks attached? Tell me te answer, and then tell me your joke.

2006-07-21 19:34:02 · 6 answers · asked by Sonny M 3

Last time we saw this riddle:

Why did the elephants go on strike?
A: Because they were tired of working for peanuts!

Hehehe.... And here is today's riddle:

What is the longest sentence in English?

Good luck :)

2006-07-21 19:31:01 · 12 answers · asked by iamigloo 6

a man was driving on a busy street when he got caught in a traffic jam. as he was waiting in his car, a man rapped on his window. he wound down the window and the guy outside said,"George bush is being held hostage by a bunch of terrorists further up on the road. they demand 500 bucks or they'll pour petrol on Bush and burn him to death."
The man pulled out his wallet and asked,"about how muchare the others donating?" the guy outside grinned, lifted up a petrol can and replied,"about 1 litre"

2006-07-21 19:28:00 · 6 answers · asked by dingdongman 1

If you're 8ft. away from a door and with each move you advance half a distance to the door.

How many moves will it take to reach the door?


cheers :)

2006-07-21 19:19:19 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous