Marriage & Divorce - 6 July 2007

that need it as bad as i do? Holy Cow! I've had enough of not having it and tired of being controlled by my nutso wife!

Im done with talking about it and being told its going to get better....it doesnt and it wont.

I need some sweet loving from someone else who needs it too. Hook a dude up!

2007-07-06 06:45:42 · 13 answers · asked by Mergler 4

And we have been married four years in the start of the marriage when things got bad he would leave run home to his parents and then come back.
I am worried he will run agin now but not as worried as i used to be. Things are about to get very tight because we have a large house payment. And five children to support. he has a job but not as good as the old one. two children are his from another marriage.
But for some reason I dont feel as worried as i usually do. i of course dont want him to leave but we recently lost a baby together and i just dont think he was that hurt.
Could it be i trust him more or im secertly upset with his actions over the baby. He made the comment the other day he will have to work two jobs if i want another child. i have been searching for a job to help him.
with that comment i am starting feel like i dont need to worry if he leaves. does it sound like i trust him or angry with him for his baby comment?

2007-07-06 06:40:54 · 5 answers · asked by jerry w 1

2007-07-06 06:38:01 · 14 answers · asked by Fruitful1 3

Hey all, I am getting married in three months. I am looking for any good sound advice you might have for me. Please, spare me the "I got advice... don't get married!" answers. I don't care to hear them. I love her, period, the end.

Any sound advice?

2007-07-06 06:37:22 · 12 answers · asked by just nate 4

mr weaver lived in new jersey also he was in the army and now the last my grandaughter heard he was living with his mother

2007-07-06 06:36:27 · 2 answers · asked by harriet b 1

Falling in Love

Of all the misconception about Love the most potent one is about "Falling in Love".
When you you say I am falling in Love, we certainly mean- "I love him" or "I love her". But two problems are immediately visible. The first is that the experience of falling in Love is specifically a sex-linked erotic experience. We do not fall in Love in with our children even though we may Love them very deeply. We do not fall in Love with friends of same sex , until we are homosexually oriented- even though we may care for them greatly. we fall in Love only we are consciously or unconsciously sexually motivated.
The second problem is that this experience of falling in Love is invariably temporary. No matter whom we fall in Love with, we sooner or later fall out of Love if the relationship continues long enough. This , however, does not mean we cease to Love that person.
If falling in Love is not Love, then what is it other than temporary and partial collapse of ego boundaries? I do not know. But the sexual specificity of the phenomenon leads me to suspect that it is a genetically determined instinctual component of mating behavior. In other words, the temporary collapse of our ego boundaries that constitutes falling in Love is a stereotypic response of human beings to a configuration of internal sexual drives and external sexual stimuli.

The most common misconception about Love is dependency is love. This is a misconception with which psychotherapists must deal on a daily basis. Its effect is seen most dramatically in an individual who makes an attempt or gesture or threat to commit suicide or who becomes incapacitatingly depressed in response to a rejection or separation from a spouse or a lover. Such a person says" I do not want to live, can not live without my husband [wife,girl,friend, etc], i love him/her so much" And when the psychotherapist responds" You are mistaken, you do not love your husband"
The patient will respond back angrily " What do you mean?", "I just told you I can't live without him/her"
Explanation is- What they define as Love is not Love but Parasitism. When you require another individual for your survival, you are a parasite on that individual. There is no choice, no freedom involved in your relationship. It is a matter of necessity rather than Love. Two people Love each other only when they are quite capable of Living without each other but choose to Love each other. I define dependency as the inability to experience wholeness or to function adequately without the certainty that one is being actively cared for by another. Dependency in healthy adults is pathological, always a manifestation of a mental illness or defect. We all- each and every one of us- even if we try to pretend to others and to ourselves that we don't have dependency needs and feelings. All of us have desires to be babied, to be nurtured without effort on our parts. every one , irrespective of his age and how much mature he/she is, looks for a mother and a father figure. But for most of us these desires or feelings do not rule our lives; they are not the predominant theme of our existence, then we have something more than dependency needs or feelings; we are dependent.

People with this disorder are so busy seeking to be Loved that they have no energy left to Love. They are like starving people, scourging wherever they can for food, and with no food of their own to give to others. They tolerate loneliness very poorly.

"If being loved is your goal, you will fail to achieve it. The only way to be assured of being Loved is to be a person worthy of Love, and you can not be a person worthy of Love when your primary goal in Life is to passively be Loved."

Thence, as of love's stupefying nature per se of which psycho-social and other correlatively expanded and extendedly growing immaturities while being widely considered as a "must" for keeping this absurd life going, this four letter word, based upon Cartesian ideology, which implies a lie woven world, is innately a "Big Lie!"

2007-07-06 06:34:09 · 2 answers · asked by Kim 1

Further to my previous post;

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ai1sraxTN41mvrFV5GMMSLnsy6IX?qid=20070624101605AAobVLz

I refused to sign the pre-nup, or any paperwork for him regarding our home.

Meanwhile, back on the farm in Virginia, the latest little escapade from my wonderful husband is that he used a line of credit he got by falsely representing himself as "single" and used that money along with money owed to him by a client for work (paid directly to the title company ... and avoiding income taxes) and mortgaged our home to the max to buy more property which he put solely in his name.

This man truly is a slimebag, he broke his word to put my name on the house after we married (the house has since accrued significant equity) and now this. It just keeps gettin better.

Other than my first thought (lawyer) anyone have any creative ideas on this one?

2007-07-06 06:28:33 · 5 answers · asked by Chikadee 2

This past few weeks was very hard on us, he wants some space so i give his space and now that i am away from him for 2 days already. I am in California right now and he in Louisiana then last night He finally confessed(over the phone) about a girl that he likes to talk with ( the girl is going through a divorce).
And i asked him if he wants to be with the girl, then he did not say YES nor NO but he said HE doesn't want to give up on our marriage. I am hurt cuz i have not done anything to him. I am a good wife to him and I love him with all my life. --sigh--

2007-07-06 06:21:13 · 10 answers · asked by mommy25 1

no pic. but my friends love the short hair pictures i have- really short chin or shorter, but my hubby wanted me to grow ti long for him so i did and now its to my waist. he loves it and is obsessed if i cut it. my friend's think i'm too concerned about his feleigns on this- i don't mind but i get bored but i know he loves it so much should i cut it or keep it for him? he also cares about what i think on his looks

2007-07-06 06:20:01 · 4 answers · asked by girl 3

We're about to get into counceling, she had an emotional affair on me.

2007-07-06 06:16:17 · 7 answers · asked by Kenny F 2

Wife cheats ok sh*t happens, husband forgives her. She says a lot of mean things to him, he takes it with a gran of salt. Rolls right over his head. Tries to be there for, he stills care about her. She's the mother of his kids, but just keeps pushing him away doesn't even want to be friends. Why is she like this?

2007-07-06 06:14:13 · 18 answers · asked by WhyNotMe 6

we have been divorced for a year now, i have made several positive changes in my life since, changes that she wanted me to do and i did them for me....not for her to grow and mature. recently i have found a lady now that i enjoy spending time with, not sure if my ex knows about her or not, but out of the blue my ex. has called and texted me about getting together for a movie and cooking dinner for me. i have declined, but now she is asking to come over to my house. what could this mean? and why now?

2007-07-06 06:14:06 · 14 answers · asked by rob j 1

What is it that my wives' friends are attracted to by being around us just to get to me? What should I do to bring it up
withou making problems?

2007-07-06 06:06:33 · 7 answers · asked by LS W 2

I get really angry/jealous when my husband watches something with naked women in it. (Not necessarily porn, but just R rated movies). Sex scenes in movies have always embarrased me for some reason and now that I am married I get really mad when a topless woman or a naked *** ashows up on the tv when we're watching together. I end up fussing at him and it's coming between us. How can I work on this?

2007-07-06 06:01:07 · 15 answers · asked by ashley b 2

I AM CALIYAH AND I HAVE AN FIANCE BY THE NAME ANDREAS, HE IS VERY LOVING TO ME,(MEANING HE GIVES'S ME THE WORLD, BUT WE HAVE AN LOT OF TIMES WHEN WE THROW BAD WORKS AT ONE ANOTHER,WHEN THAT HAPPENS IT HURTS THE BOTH OF US. IT DOES NOT LAST THAT LONG BUT COMES UP OFFTEN. WE KNOW THAT WE WANT TO BE HUSBAND AND WIFE BUT HOW CAN WE STOP THAT PROBLEM. O AND IF THIS WILL HELP WE BEEN TOGETHER 5 YEARS.

2007-07-06 05:41:33 · 9 answers · asked by caliyah1234567 2

My fiance has 2 children from a previous marriage & her ex is behind a month & a half thus far & the sad thing is, he's only paying 500 a month for two kids.

2007-07-06 05:40:03 · 7 answers · asked by jw 1

the mother has a temporary restraining order with my child on it but she has now been sentenced to 30 days in jail how can i regain custody of my child?

2007-07-06 05:34:14 · 4 answers · asked by alocke_2004 2

when you have been with someone for many years and you know they are the one, thats the person you will marry they just havent asked you yet, is it normal to freak out when you think of it. im 20 so im still young, i know i will marry my b/f but when i sit and think about him proposing and the whole walking down the isle thing i get a little scared. thats just becuase im not ready right? or is it because hes not the one. did you do that when you new the person you were dating is going to be the one?

2007-07-06 05:32:50 · 15 answers · asked by lovely 3

I want to do this myself as quickly and least expensively as possible because I have been seperated for almost a year!

2007-07-06 05:24:28 · 11 answers · asked by Valerie N 1

i asked a question about changing the locks on the house so my wife couldn't get in and got blasted. let me give you some background. first off she left and then started coming in and taking stuff while i wasn't there. second she sent a list to my attorney of what she wants, and it's basically everything. third she's a spoiled brat who was raised that way and thinks she deserves everything. i was just protecting myself from her by changing the locks. now she's mad as heck. i told her give me a list of what you want and I'll put that stuff in the garage for you to pick up. she is so angry i won't let her in the house but i had no choice given her actions and what she wants. I don't think I'm being unfair at all given her actions and I don't know why she's mad at me. she knew that she wanted everything and was pissed i didn't let her have everything. things need to be divided equally. I had no choice so now why is she so angry? I'm moving her things for her out to the garage.

2007-07-06 05:23:33 · 9 answers · asked by survivor 1

my morgage was due on the 1st. its 900 I just called the bank and I was negative 165. I can't stop crying.. i don't wanna sell my house because it hasn't been 2 yrs. yet its only been 1yr. and 3 months. What should I do? Everyday I just wanna shoot myself, it just seems easier than the pressure of my bills. And my boyfriend that lives here barely helps. I know I should kick him to the curb but i'm waiting for money from him.

2007-07-06 05:23:19 · 16 answers · asked by Rockchick 2

I am 36, divorced with no children. My boyfriend is 38 and has never been married and does not have children. We have been together for just over a year (14 months) and have lived together for about 8 months. We have discussed several times that we both would like to get married and have children. Around our 1 year anniversary I brought up the "when are we going to get married?" conversation. He said he wants to get married and is very happy and loves me very much, but it has only been a year. After a few days of thinking it over, I talked to him again and suggested we talk seriously about marriage within the next 6 months. He agreed completely with me.

He is considering taking a job out of state and asked me if I would go with him. I said of course because I am with you for the long haul. However, I worry that if we are not engaged and re-locate together, I may never get a proposal. My biological clock is ticking and I feel that I can't wait forever. What should I do?

2007-07-06 05:22:53 · 13 answers · asked by The_New_Mrs_G 4

My mom and Dad have said they were going to divorce over 20 times in my life now. This time, I think it's actually happening. I can't stand having divorced parents, and they know it. I just think that if they loved me and my younger brother, they would wait to do this. Recently they've been great together, but an isue with money came up and now they won't talk to each other. I know they both love me, but if they did, wouldn't they bear a little longer just to make my brother and my life better? Am I wrong to think that way?? I don't know what to think anymore. Please help.

2007-07-06 05:17:31 · 37 answers · asked by :) :) :) :) :) 3

If I get married and get a inherintance from my parents would he be entitled to that also? Also if a divorce was to happen would I have to split it with him?

2007-07-06 05:08:24 · 18 answers · asked by shawnie 3

I have been married 4 years and we have been tough times financially and in-law problems but have managed to keep the marriage happy and healthy. We have two kids a girl and a boy. A few months back she started a new job downtown... everything was going well, she would go out for co-workers for drinks on Friday and so on. but lately she started going out twice a week and coming home in the morning. I did some checking and found out she was having an affair with a guy she works with. She still chases him and lies to me about it. She loves me but is not in love with me ( I feel the same way)and I know that this will happen again. I don't trust her.

I want a divorces but would be the first in my family of 45 marriages to get one. Her family is filled with divorce. Also I am broke and can't afford to live apart. I want my kids to grow up in a happy home so should I just let it go or end it???

2007-07-06 05:03:58 · 13 answers · asked by smith99912 2

My boyfiend and i have alomost been together for about 5 years in August.. we took a year off in between for better understanding of our relationship and are pretty serious this time. We both are to the point where we NEED to move out.. both 20 and 21.. Any advise on talking to his and thinking aboug getting a house or apartment. I just don't know how to bring it up! Thanks!!

2007-07-06 05:02:09 · 6 answers · asked by Kelli Jo 2

problem with being insecure. So am I??? My fiance and I have a married couple that we do things with a few times a month. He has known them for several years (10+) and actually set them up on their first date. I have only known them for about (7) months. We all have a lot of fun together and I enjoy the "friendship" with one exception. The wife's a hugger and she also has VERY big breast. It is also common knowledge that my fiance is a "breast" man. The first time I ever met this woman she commented to me as she hugged my fiance good-bye "he likes to hug me cause he likes to feel my big boobs". When I discussed this with my fiance he just kinda blew it off. He said she has always hugged him from the first time he ever met her and that she was making a joke and I took it out of context. He is very secure and confident and thinks jealousy is silly. He says he has no attraction for her whatsoever and has never seen her as anything but a long time friend. What do you think????

2007-07-06 04:59:22 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous

Okay i am getting a divorce after 4 yrs of marriage because of my husbands anger managment issues that turned into physical abuse it was only once but he dislocated my some of fingers and bruised my face.I have a 5 yr old daughter from a prior realationship who never really got along with my husband.My daughters real father has only seen her a few times as a baby but sends her presents and money .She in return sends him her artwork and at present i am setting it up so they can meet and slowly be introduced.However her father and i will be meeting in person a few times before that to talk since he has agreed to help me out money wise for a few months and he wants to work on communication relationship ect with me.Last time i went to see my daughters father we ended up having sex i was married but seperated at the time.Very confused and afraid it might happen again?I do not want to make an emotional mess?

2007-07-06 04:58:03 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

How do you handle discipline with your children? do you let your partner spank/repremend etc. your child? how has exposing ur partner to your child affected the relationship? What do you do in a situation in which your child is misbehaving and your partner tries to tell you how to handle it but you don't quite agree and keep doing what you usually do?? thing is i'm 24 and my boy is 4. I've dated my fiance for 4 years and now that we're gonna live together we're having problems because he says i don't repremend my child the correct way. I spank my child when i feel i'ts about time but- i don't get on him for every little thing he does. He's quite obedient in general but there are times he'll throw a tantrum if i don't buy him a toy & it's hard to handle this when ur partner wants to spank a child that is not his. How do i handle this? it's really affecting my relationship with my man. I just think that my son has his father and if anyone should spank...

2007-07-06 04:49:55 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-07-06 04:40:10 · 20 answers · asked by Sad mama 25 1