Family & Relationships - 9 October 2007

8 months ago, I started going out with this girl, and it turns out that she has a lot in her past, and on top of that, is having a ton of problems concerning her dysfunctional family. When we were dating, she frequently lied to me about important issues (eg. sex, background, family) as well as other issues. I chose to stick it out, for a few reasons. #1 she was astray in her life + i really cared about her. #2 she had an abusive family and had nobody else #3 i loved her, #4 she was very fun to make out with. She lied to me, and we always had trouble communicating our feelings and pretty much anything. I ended it because it was hurting me. I dont have this problem with anyone else. Why am I having this problem with her? I recently tried calling her to get some coffee, again, it ended in an argument, because she couldn't express how she felt. What is the problem? What can I do to fix this? Why is it so much trouble? How can I show her a more effective mode of communication?

2007-10-09 10:24:32 · 1 answers · asked by Dr. Mike B 1 in Singles & Dating

2007-10-09 10:24:11 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

My husband smokes, and I don't agree with doing it in the home when you have kids. I understand we disagree on this, and have given him a lot of leeway to let him do what he says he needs to calm his anxiety. That said, why can't he understand that this also goes against my nature? I get annoyed that pot smokers think everyone should see it their way. I don't expect everyone not to smoke. So why should he expect me to think it's okay? Mind you, I smoked when I was younger. But don't feel the need to do it any more.

2007-10-09 10:23:24 · 20 answers · asked by trapeze 5 in Marriage & Divorce

open to any thoughts

2007-10-09 10:17:42 · 13 answers · asked by knightsangeleyes 4 in Marriage & Divorce

We have been married 4 years and I'm currently staying w/ his family untill our house gets built. Living w/ his mom is so stressful. She's a pig, she leaves her plates and trash everywhere. She is loud in public. We recently got into a argument about the fridge door being left open by me. I told her I didn't want to talk about it. She went off and slammed the doors. How can our relationship work out ?

2007-10-09 10:17:04 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

2007-10-09 10:15:03 · 3 answers · asked by Merlin 1 in Marriage & Divorce

I and my husband have not been getting along lately and I’ve been thinking about divorce or separation. Now that he is getting deployed he doesn’t want me to stay with my parents. You think he is being selfish? He wants me to go live with my in-laws because I don’t have to pay rent, food or utilities. His family owns a company and they are financially wealthy and live in Maryland. He had been deployed to Korea for a year in 2005 and I stayed with his family, now I want to stay with mines. My family is soon moving back to Texas and I want to stay with them. My husband said that if I left to live with my parents that he would take the car away, and will not support me financially. I don’t care because I can support my self. Only thing I would file for is child support. 600 dollars a month is not bad, right?

2007-10-09 10:14:39 · 17 answers · asked by anonimo 1 in Marriage & Divorce

In essentially every question I've asked it's been the same sad story, I am a nice kid, a soon to be national merit scholar and want to date this one girl.

Unforunately, I ****** around and another asshole got her first. I am working under the assumption that she has finally realized that most guys are just jerks because of the fact that she broke it off with the other jerk.

Anyways, I need a plan so this time I get her to be mine. No screwing around, I need a real plan, that makes her relalize that I am the guy for her because I am sweet and very intelligent. Please help me. I am willing to listen to whatever any of you say.

I need to get right to the point and not screw things up again. I will give 10 points to who I believe has the best idea. Thank you.

2007-10-09 10:13:48 · 13 answers · asked by positiveaspectofnegativethinking 1 in Singles & Dating

i recently saw a show where a man had two human size dolls that he dresses, does their hair, and sleeps with them. everything of the doll is made to fit his expectation, lookwise, race, skincolor, weight, breast size, everything, the whole package. He says he would never have to worry about not being loved or being cheated on. He even said that if he died, he would want to be buried with his dolls. I find it interesting yet disturbing. What if one day these dolls replace us? Would a guy really pick a doll over us real woman? It's like a stepford wife kind of thing. what happened to love and companionship?

2007-10-09 10:10:42 · 16 answers · asked by sleeping.b3auty 1 in Marriage & Divorce

One of my ex boy friends over dosed on herion I think it was like 2 months ago. Him and I had a really strong relationship in middle school and though jr. high, and it was like off and on. He wrote me tons of letters, and I saved them all. The last time I got to see him was 2 years ago at a football game, and he didn't look very good. And two months ago one of my friends was at a grocery store that he use to work at and they were saying his name and saying that he passed away. And she called me and let me know, and i just didn't feel like he was really gone, and i didn't cry until i knew it was true. And I found out it really was and his parents died in a car crash when he was like 2 or something. And I just cant get him out of my head! The reason why he killed himself because his best friend did. And I shared some letters with his gardian. And I just can't stop thinking about him I miss him so much and wish i got to talk to him. And i find myself talking about him to my bf.

2007-10-09 10:07:39 · 20 answers · asked by You'll shoot your eye out! 3 in Singles & Dating

If I was castrated in an motorcycle accident.,Am I supposed to be alone the rest of my life? Would a woman love me enough to stick by me?

2007-10-09 10:06:53 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

For those of you married a long time how did you weather the storms of life without breaking up or giving up and when you or your spouse did not have a job, how did you cope?

2007-10-09 10:05:02 · 10 answers · asked by encourager4God 5 in Marriage & Divorce

I'm horny all the time. I thought I had a sex addiction, but I looked it up and I'm perfectly normal. I get horny just looking at women. They are so beautiful and sexy. Most of them. Are you the same way or does it take more to make you horny?

2007-10-09 10:04:15 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

Squid is going to Northern pastures tomorrow for days training.. goodnight all.

2007-10-09 10:02:53 · 11 answers · asked by skaska 5 in Marriage & Divorce

You know that this girl is having some issues regarding trusting men coz she was broken before and you find that she's worth your effort to win her heart and restore back her confidence in men, herself and life ... would you be patient to help her out and try to win her heart? What would you do then, if you are seriously willing to?

2007-10-09 10:00:37 · 4 answers · asked by Sara007 5 in Singles & Dating

what do men think of women when they sleep with a man on the first date of a one night stand. be honest

2007-10-09 09:58:24 · 8 answers · asked by missred 1 in Singles & Dating

If she didn't show previous or obvious interest before?

2007-10-09 09:53:16 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

My fiance of 2 years won't stop treating me like his Mom. He calls me crying about everything. Yes, actually crying. He wants me to support him in our relationship. He thinks I'm going to leave him one day and if I ever hang the phone up on him he calls me back in hysterics, asking if I don't love him anymore.

The problem is I love him. I really do with my whole heart, but I don't like being his Mommy about everything.

His Mom divorced his Dad for being the exact same way, I don't want our relationship to end up like that, How can I make him stop? He's on my nerves.

2007-10-09 09:52:48 · 18 answers · asked by Latefortea 2 in Marriage & Divorce

there is this girl in school who i really really like.
she looks good, and is fairly smart. BUT:
she hangs out with troublemaker guys and people like that
she also hangs out with some good people but still the trouble maker people. and i dont like that
she also goes to my karate school,
she is a black belt i only have my camoflouge belt here is the order:
white
orange
yellow
camoflouge
green
purple(one)
purple(two)
blue(one)
blue(two)
red(one)
red(two)
black(white stripe)
black
so in other words, she can beat me up no problem.
but arent usually the guys stronger than the girls?
and would she feel aukward dating me?
also my family has never gone out with someone until they were almost marrying age
i dont think my parents would like me to have a girlfriend.
her dad is friends with my dad
and that's how i got started in karate
because she was in karate for a while now probably 3 years
my details finish in another it is called the same except only less !!!!'s

2007-10-09 09:52:22 · 9 answers · asked by Harshil 2 in Singles & Dating

I have been wondering for awhile if it is possible. I though if each parent had some black in them that it would be possible to have a white baby, I also have seen to mixed people to have twins which one is balck and one is white. But i have never found the answer. well thanks for any help.

2007-10-09 09:48:50 · 11 answers · asked by / 3 in Other - Family & Relationships

In July, I discovered (innocently) that my wife lied to me about a number in her phone. As a result, I secretly looked at her phone's directory and discovered a suspicious entry. I also discovered a series of text messages/emails indicating that she was at the very least engaging in inappropriate flirting, if not actually having an affair. When I confronted her with the evidence I found, she immediately denied that anything improper had taken place, explained that it was only flirting and that she would never let herself cross the line again.

Importantly, she attacked me quite harshly because of the way in which I obtained the information - snooping around her cell phone/email.

1) Do ends ever justify the means in such a circumstance - is my snooping understandable/justifiable?

2) Having recently discovered another suspicious text message (cancelling a dinner plan with Mr. X on a night on which I was out of town), how can I confront her w/o admitting to new snooping?

2007-10-09 09:47:49 · 48 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

So here's the deal. I dated a girl second semester last year. We broke up at the end of the school year and didnt really talk over the summer. She is now dating one of my good friend's who I am living with in an apartment this year with 2 other guys. I am still pretty good friends with the guy who she is now dating. we are both in nrotc together. Anyways, the two other guys seem to have sided with my ex since the breakup and we don't really talk much amongst each other or hang out anymore...which is sad since we used to be good friends, and hang all the time. Our apt. is 8 driving minutes north of campus and I do not have a car. All of my roommates do, and there is a bus that only runs on weekdays. I often feel trapped at the apt., often with someone I dont really want to be around. I stay in my room a lot now too. About the second week of school, my ex and my friend, without asking, decided that she was going to practically move into our apt. She is an attention whore, and all...

2007-10-09 09:46:25 · 4 answers · asked by theman9654 1 in Friends

And at what age did you actually get married? Or if you are not married yet, do you plan on getting married one day?

2007-10-09 09:46:21 · 9 answers · asked by sleeping.b3auty 1 in Marriage & Divorce

My husband has a porno addiction and it has really affected me emotionally .It has been going on for the 3 years that we've been married. We spoke about it before and he is always in denial. He told me once that he had that problem since he was 15 years old and now is hard for him to let it go. I have a low self esteem because of this. I'm constantly worried about him being alone at home. We have a 1 year old and don’t want him around his dad if I’m not home. I set up a hidden camera in our house and saw that my husband didn’t even pay attention to our son. He was all into his porn. I’m really angry at him and don’t even know what to do. I want to be able to hang out with my friends, start working now that my son is older, finish school, and everything that us girl like doing, but I don’t see how. I just don’t want my husband setting a bad example for our son, he suppose to be his role model. I don’t trust him aver since I found about his addiction. We have talked about getting counseling and my husband refused not to get help. I did get counseling but it didn’t help me at all. Obviously I can't change him and the change needs to come with in him. What if he continues like this? I really love my husband but if he doesn't change his bad habit then I see no point of being in this relationship. So what would you do if you where in my shoes? Also He is in the military and he spends most of his time working, on his free time or weekend he spends all day playing online video games. We have no life, and I don’t want this to be a miserable and boring life for my child.

Answer only if you are against porn and please don’t be rude! Thank you!

2007-10-09 09:46:21 · 21 answers · asked by anonimo 1 in Marriage & Divorce

we make about 5,000 month (he makes 3,500 and i make 1,500... yeah not much but im going to go to college in 2 months so this is temp im actually going to quit and get a part time... so it will be less.....anyways.... he has court today for child support how much do you think he'll have to pay for child support? he already got the insurance for the baby.... i think it cost him $200 a month......the baby's mama doesnt work and had another baby from another guy... and if she does she works as a hotel room cleaner getting paid min wage... ..... yeah DRAMA!!!! but seriously anyone have any idea???

2007-10-09 09:46:12 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

Before meeting or marrying my husband he had another girlfriend whom together had a son. She kept their son and sends him with us for summer & christmas. But she is now a stripper. we feel that she would be not taking care of him as she should. I know that's her personal business but a 7 yr old whom mother isn't around at nights and knows she is a dancer is kind of unhealthy. Someone give me some advice of what can we do.

2007-10-09 09:44:13 · 35 answers · asked by lucy 3 in Marriage & Divorce

I run my own business in the evenings and I was coming back from there this evening and on my way to the gym when I stopped into my house to find my boyfriend watching porn and *******. He was really embarrassed and I was really upset. We had a discussion about this lately (that he watches porn) and I told him that even though I have no prob with it and would even watch it myself it hurts when he does it when I am out for a few hours (he swears he loves me so much and also loves my body but now I feel insecure about it)- until then I hadn't caught him in the act... until tonight. We only have sex a couple of times a week and I'm 99% sure it's because he's doing this so often when I'm not around that he doesn't feel the need. I told him we're finished - overreaction maybe, but in my heart maybe it's cause he's just not the one...

What do other people think - esp. men...... why would he be doing this when I've just popped out and what should I do?

2007-10-09 09:42:24 · 22 answers · asked by aine_alainn 3 in Other - Family & Relationships

Do we have to get along or can we simply stay away from each other? My ex had an affair and left me for the other woman after a ten year marriage. I have to deal with my ex for the sake of our son. I do not bad mouth my ex or his girlfriend. I want my son to have a good relationship with his Dad. I have done all I can to help my son adjust. But given the circumstances we will never be one big happy family. I see a lot of questions from step mothers on here asking how to deal with their husband's ex wife. My question...why not just stay away from each other? As long as the kids are being taken care of at both homes - do not deal with each other. Make an agreement - no contact. Let the exs deal with each other and leave it at that. Is this possible?

2007-10-09 09:40:38 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

he says he leave it up to me to pick our outfits for hallowen this year i as thinking of making him dress up as a girl character he open minded and out going so i say he do it i was thinking of maybe a witch or vampire or maybe just give him girlie outfit say a prom queen what do you think

2007-10-09 09:40:24 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

So here's the deal. I dated a girl second semester last year. We broke up at the end of the school year and didnt really talk over the summer. She is now dating one of my good friend's who I am living with in an apartment this year with 2 other guys. I am still pretty good friends with the guy who she is now dating. we are both in nrotc together. Anyways, the two other guys seem to have sided with my ex since the breakup and we don't really talk much amongst each other or hang out anymore...which is sad since we used to be good friends, and hang all the time. Our apt. is 8 driving minutes north of campus and I do not have a car. All of my roommates do, and there is a bus that only runs on weekdays. I often feel trapped at the apt., often with someone I dont really want to be around. I stay in my room a lot now too. About the second week of school, my ex and my friend, without asking, decided that she was going to practically move into our apt. She is an attention whore, and all...

2007-10-09 09:39:44 · 2 answers · asked by theman9654 1 in Friends