My husband smokes, and I don't agree with doing it in the home when you have kids. I understand we disagree on this, and have given him a lot of leeway to let him do what he says he needs to calm his anxiety. That said, why can't he understand that this also goes against my nature? I get annoyed that pot smokers think everyone should see it their way. I don't expect everyone not to smoke. So why should he expect me to think it's okay? Mind you, I smoked when I was younger. But don't feel the need to do it any more.
2007-10-09 10:23:24 · 20 answers · asked by trapeze 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I guess I should say, he doesn't do it in front of my child. But I asked him not to do it in the day at all, and that's what he keeps going back on. I don't want my son to smell it. And I don't want to either. And no, he wasn't a pot smoker when we dated, but when he was young. And then started a year ago again.
2007-10-09 10:37:52 · update #1
I'm sure your husband is a nice person. Pot is addictive. I think you should get him some help because its not healthy for you or your children. I understand that he needs something to take away his anxiety, but he can do something positive. Good Luck!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-10-09 10:35:06 · answer #1 · answered by Kanesha J 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I don't smoke it, either; always was afraid of what I'd be getting...it's not like the FDA regulates the stuff. However, evidence shows it does work wonders with anxiety. I'd recommend it before any other medicine on the market. But just like pills, pot can cloud and slow your judgments and reactions. Also, if it finds it's way into the kids' systems (say, from smoke build up in your air ducts), you run the risk of losing your family and your home and livelihoods. There's not much you can say or do to change another's perspective. Just ask him to keep in mind what is in the childrens best interest.
2007-10-09 17:35:42 · answer #2 · answered by MWestbrook 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a husband who smokes too and from the beginning I told him he would NEVER do it around our children. And he doesn't. If he feels the need ( and he often does) he goes outside. I've been riding him on his habit for 12 years and he's to the point where he doesn't even do it around me. That's a whole other issue though.
But you know what I told my husband that woke him up a little? I told him that if the kids ever catch him doing it then he's going to be the one dealing with them when there in high school hanging out with a crowd that does it and then they start smoking it themselves. Yea, dad, try explaining that one!
2007-10-09 17:33:46 · answer #3 · answered by beenthinkin' 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not okay, especially when my husband smokes in our bedroom or our bathroom (the little fan in there doesn't do much, though). If I send him out to the garage, he will just smoke in the house while we're out and me and the kids are welcomed home to that sickening lingering scent...
BTW- it supposedly "calms him down", BUT it ADDS to my anxiety, maybe my blood pressure too...
It also doesn't help that all his "friends" lied their way into getting the California pot-smokers card, so they are all "legal" here and can buy it freely and then sell it to him way cheap...
2007-10-09 17:54:59 · answer #4 · answered by marli 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is why I am divorced.
If he uses the excuse "calms his anxiety" then he's never going to stop. My husband used that. Long story, more than a couple of years and a divorce later... my ex-husband is a lazy pot-smoking deadbeat dad. If he thinks it's okay to smoke pot - your in for trouble. I asked one time if he would support me in teaching against drugs to our son. He explained that pot wasn't really like the other drugs and if he was going to try it out - he wanted him to be introduced by him. What a loser. Good luck. This makes my stomach hurt just thinking about it.
2007-10-09 17:44:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well i am a pot smoker but i don't do it in my home i only smoke out side . I quit the whole time i was pregnant and till he was 3 months old ( that's when i stopped breastfeeding) I smoke it to keep me sane i have bipolar disorder so it keeps me in the same state of mind. I don't think everyone should see things my way but i shouldn't be judged either. I am a great mother despite what i smoke
2007-10-09 17:32:18 · answer #6 · answered by CYNTHIA 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
We all did things when we were younger. Doesn't make them the right things to do now. Also doesn't make them legal now. Look if he gets busted you loss the house, the kids, and your *** ends up in jail too. I would tell him Don't bring it in the house or have it in the cars that you ride in, nor around the kids. He gets busted with the kids you'll play hell getting them back. And if he does it in the house around you and you breath it, you will test positive when the judge asks you to take the drug test to get you kids back. I say Welcome to the rest of your life. Now do whats in the best interest of you and your kids. Let him do it if he must but put the rules out there. Good Luck
2007-10-09 17:31:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm only pulling USA questions up so I'll assume you are Americans or enjoying our hospitality. Its illegal. Your husband is participating in a criminal behavior that can result in not only his arrest and imprisonment but yours. And your children can be taken away from you, you can lose your home and cars and everything else. Only you can decide if his anxiety is worth that. There are prescription drugs that will do exactly the same thing, are cheaper and safer. So his reasoning is BS. He smokes because he's addicted to the behavior and he only thinks of himself.
I had a friend once, who did the very same thing, with the very same reasoning. His wife called him one day when the cops came to arrest them for suspected distribution of a controlled substance. Which he wasn't doing but they found just enough drug evidence to arrest him, his wife and have their baby son taken by family services. The cops also tore up thousands of dollars of personal effects looking for what they thought was a windfall of drugs. They didn't find anything but that sure didn't stop them from destroying wedding albums, throwing out all their frozen food and threatening to shoot their dogs. Fair, surely not but my friend was engaging in criminal behavior so all bets were off for fair.
You are supposed to be protecting your children. Tell him to knock it off or have him removed from the home.
2007-10-09 17:34:58 · answer #8 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think the smokin is his "deal", I don't judge him on that, but the kids thing is not right. I have an ex who does that with his four year old daughter all the time and we share a baby and I don't even let him around him for that very reason. He will smoke it in the car with his kids or whatever. Men Suck!!!
2007-10-09 17:30:29 · answer #9 · answered by LilSunbeam 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You really need to take back ur RESPECT.. for yourself and kids..
he is totally disrespecting u and the kids..
It is not a good role model nor is it good for their health.. he could step outside, in the garage or car or where ever..? but not bring it home.. it could cause the child protective services at ur door.. ..
just tell him u are OK with it.. but not INSIDE THE HOME..
Ur kids will admire u,, and respect u for it.. later on it life.. good luck..
2007-10-09 18:51:16 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ Blondie ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋