Jokes & Riddles - March 2007

ANT or SPIDER ??

WHY...? ? ?

2007-03-02 13:21:54 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-03-02 13:21:06 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

glass be half full or half empty tonight

2007-03-02 13:21:02 · 15 answers · asked by canuticklemepink 5

2007-03-02 13:20:26 · 5 answers · asked by Toilet 2

2007-03-02 13:13:42 · 6 answers · asked by Toilet 2

Your daddies little squirt! What is it with parents trying to gross their kids out? My mum told me this when I was still just a kiddie! Reckon I shoulda called childline! Note to Slightly Peeved, my mums def a jock!;)

2007-03-02 13:11:54 · 10 answers · asked by Lovely Witch 25 2

This is part of the "conundrum" game on a virtual pets site I play. I need some help figuring it out! You don't need to know who "Dr. Sloth" is or what "Virtupets" or "Grundos" are. :^) All help is appreciated as this has me totally stumped! The riddle is as follows:

"In an exceptionally long corridor in the Virtupets Space Station, there are one thousand windows along one wall. Coincidentally, there are exactly one thousand Grundos in the station. Dr Sloth orders the first Grundo to open the blinds on every window. Then, he orders the second Grundo to close the blinds on every second window. Then the third Grundo is told to go to every third window, and close the blinds if they are open, and open the blinds if they are closed. The fourth Grundo does this for every fourth window, and so on.

After all 1000 Grundos complete the process, how many blinds are open?"

2007-03-02 13:10:37 · 17 answers · asked by Lulu (: 3

I called him to check that he would get home safely. He told me it was all ok.- waiting for a bus, be here in less than 20 mins (about right I figure, taking into account distance & location) - 35 mins + passes & he comes in. The following conversation goes like this (Remember he's had a few beers)
Me: Good night then? Him: Right. G'night then.
Me: How come it took so long to get here?
Him: No buses were stopping at my stop.
Me: Which stop were you at?
Him: Erm, not sure now, the long one. You know the one.
Me (starting to suss it out & seeing the funny side) It WAS a real STOP tho' wasn't it? (He looks a bit confused 4 a sec).
Me: R U sure it was a bus stop? Y'know, did it have a proper sign and all that? Him: Yeh I think so.
Me: Hmm.:. It wasn't just a pole on the edge of the pavement was it? (He frowns) Did it have a big light at the top, maybe?
Him: Yeh maybe. Me: That would be a lamp-post then
Him: Ah Yes! But when I got the other bus it was going the wrong...

2007-03-02 13:05:00 · 10 answers · asked by funnygirl 4

2007-03-02 13:00:03 · 9 answers · asked by Toilet 2

2007-03-02 12:56:46 · 23 answers · asked by Toilet 2

my brother gets sooooo annoyed when i say ur mom! its so funny! he doesn't think so tho! :)

2007-03-02 12:52:19 · 10 answers · asked by Jamison 1

2007-03-02 12:52:19 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous

A young couple were married, and celebrated their first night
together, doing what newlyweds do, time and time again, all night long.
Morning comes and the groom goes into the bathroom but finds no towel
when he emerges from the shower.

He asks the bride to please bring one from the bedroom. When she
gets to the bathroom door, he opened the door, exposing his body for
the first time to his bride where she sees all of him well.

Her eyes went up and down and at about midway, they stopped and
stared, and she asked shyly, "What's that?", pointing to a small part of
his anatomy.

He, also being shy, thought for a minute and then said, "Well,
that's what we had so much fun with last night."

And she, in amazement, asked, "Is that all we have left?"

2007-03-02 12:51:07 · 10 answers · asked by Jim W 4

This thing all things devours:
Birds, beasts, trees, flowers;
Gnaws iron, bites steel;
Grinds hard stones to meal;
Slays king, ruins town,
And beats high mountain down.

Let's see how many can figure it out =)

2007-03-02 12:50:06 · 16 answers · asked by Daniel 1

He lies awake at night wondering if there's a dog!

2007-03-02 12:49:54 · 8 answers · asked by Lovely Witch 25 2

Jim is walkin down the street, When his mate rides up on a brand new bike.
"where did you get such a great bike." he asks dave.
Dave says," Well, yesterday I was walkin along mindin me own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw off all of her clothes, and said, "Take all that you want."
"So I did."
Jim nodded:: "Good choice- I don't think her clothes would have fitted you!"

2007-03-02 12:33:55 · 14 answers · asked by raybbies 5

Tramp walks into a jewellers, pulls down his pants and starts fingering his a**e. Shop assisitant yells 'Get out you dirty bas***d!.' Tramp says 'MAake up your fu**in mind.' And points to the sign in the window that reads, Come in and pick your ring in comfort. Sorry it's bad isn't it! I'm soooo bored!

2007-03-02 12:29:34 · 14 answers · asked by Lovely Witch 25 2

guessing games and tricks like the ones where you draw something and make the person try and figure it out not jokes. sorry i can't really explain this well but an example is:-

the one where you draw 9 boxes that represent stables but you also have 10 horses so you ask someone to try and figure out how to give each horse a stable to himself without removing a horse.
the answer it you would write ten horses in the stable boxes.

what are these kind or puzzles called?

2007-03-02 12:26:14 · 3 answers · asked by **Lilyanne** 3

2007-03-02 12:23:58 · 10 answers · asked by J.JEBA 1

2007-03-02 12:12:03 · 14 answers · asked by charley128 5

what is the longest word you can spell using the top row of your keyboard?

qwertyuiop < that line? First right answer gets best.

2007-03-02 12:02:34 · 8 answers · asked by John P 6

This is one of my great philosopical questions

2007-03-02 12:01:44 · 8 answers · asked by arch_gamer17 1

A rich man is away on a business trip and phones home. The maid answers the phone and he asks if he can speak to his wife.
"She is upstairs having sex with her lover," the maid replies.
"Right," says the man, "Go upstairs,Take my shotgun and shot them both."
The maid leaves the phone,and the man here's two loud shots over the phone, then she returns.
"What do I do with the bodies?" she says.
"Take them out the back and dump them in the swimming pool!" he says.
"What swimming pool ?" asks the maid.
"Is that 849 8950. asks the man.

2007-03-02 11:52:00 · 10 answers · asked by raybbies 5

An Irish family have been found frozen to death outside the Dublin Odeon. They had been queing for 3 weeks to see "Closed for the Winter".

2007-03-02 11:50:55 · 15 answers · asked by Buffy 4

2007-03-02 11:49:57 · 12 answers · asked by justlazy1230 1

The new law requires that all bicycles riders have been wearing helmets while on their bicycles,even when they are not moving.

A. have been wearing

B. while

C.bicycles

D. even when

E. No error

2007-03-02 11:42:11 · 21 answers · asked by oriedo_droidpower 2

2007-03-02 11:36:45 · 19 answers · asked by Toilet 2

2007-03-02 11:36:25 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-03-02 11:36:23 · 7 answers · asked by p_l20032001 1

answer the riddle

2007-03-02 11:32:43 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous