Jokes & Riddles - June 2006

8,5,4,9,1,7,6,3,2

2006-06-29 10:00:46 · 13 answers · asked by Finnegan 7

2006-06-29 09:59:03 · 13 answers · asked by uhhhhhhhh 3

Banana, assess, dresser, grammar, potato, revive , uneven,
voodoo.

2006-06-29 09:58:28 · 11 answers · asked by Featherman 5

and someone tells Bush, "We just lost 3 Brazilians in Iraq, sir."
And Bush put his head in his hands and said, "Oh, no!" He thought for a minute, and looked up and asked, "How many is a brazilian??"

2006-06-29 09:57:24 · 2 answers · asked by amyvnsn 5

My bro and i have joined together to get back at my dad for 13 years of pranks. its going to take a while. please give any ideas. 10 points to the best one. =P

2006-06-29 09:56:56 · 12 answers · asked by t -oder 2

Whatever kind, it doesnt matter. Cheesy is very acceptable!

2006-06-29 09:54:23 · 8 answers · asked by projectmayhem182 2

"Hi Ma how are you? he ask

"Well I'm fine just a little weak" she replies

The son is now worried "Weak! Ma what's wrong? Why are you feeling weak?"

"Oh it's nothing', she says " I just haven't eaten in two weeks."

"WHAT?" Now he's really worried. "Ma how come you haven't eaten anything."

"Eh, I didn't want my mouth to be full in case you should call."

2006-06-29 09:47:05 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous

a monkey is sitting in a tree smoking pot. Along comes a lizard amd see's the monkey. "hey what are you doing up there" asks the lizard. "Smoking a dobie" replies the monkey, "come on up".After a while of smoking pot the lizard gets thirsy and tells the monkey he's going to the river for a drink. While at the river the lizard meets the alligator and tells him about the monkey. The alligator has never seen a pot smoking monkey so he goes to take a look. Upon his arrival at the tree the alligator yells up " hey monkey, what are you doing ?" The monkey looks down and replies "DUDE, how much did you drink?"

2006-06-29 09:46:47 · 12 answers · asked by lt30102 2

2006-06-29 09:43:11 · 15 answers · asked by ladybug_ref 2

In your life u might have loved someone or had been attracted by some one. So dare to write his/her name & some details here. May be that person reads ur answer & also dont 4get to write ur name in the end.

2006-06-29 09:37:43 · 6 answers · asked by Tanya S 3

I havn't seen you in ages said the friend, where have you been?
You wouldn't beleive where i've been he replied. I went on safari last month and became separated from the group. I wandered off into the jungle and a big hairy ape caught me and carried me off to his den He kept me captive for two weeks and had his wicked way with me any time he liked. Then I was rescued and returned home.

"My goodness" said his friend " where you hurt? "

" Hurt " he said " he never wrote, he never phoned "---------------

2006-06-29 09:35:28 · 13 answers · asked by bill M 1

2006-06-29 09:31:12 · 2 answers · asked by Kelly H 2

hola es un placer para mi tenerte como amiga y sobre todas las cosas eres muy bonita espero tener la oprtunidad de alguna vez platicar, saludos besos y abrazos ciao


Someone has given me this comment.

2006-06-29 09:24:55 · 8 answers · asked by Tanya S 3

10 points for a correct answer. Just the number. Leave something to guess fo the next one.

2006-06-29 09:16:20 · 9 answers · asked by Puppy Zwolle 7

2am............... i can't sleeeep help me some body pls.........

2006-06-29 09:14:56 · 9 answers · asked by KK 1

heres an example:

They say opposites attract. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured. haha

2006-06-29 09:12:15 · 7 answers · asked by scrdudie7 3

10 points for the correct answer.
Don't over do it. Just 3 letters will do. Leave something to puzzle for the next person to come along.

2006-06-29 09:11:09 · 9 answers · asked by Puppy Zwolle 7

this old man drives out of a car dealership w/ a brand new convertable. he starts going 80 when he sees a state trooper on his tail. he thinks 2 his self "i can out drive him"!90, 100, 150. he then thinks 2 himself "what am i doing". he then pulls over waiting 4 the state trooper 2 aresst him. the state troper walks up 2 the car. "i have 30 min. left in my shift and it's fri. give me one good reason i shouldnt aresst u that i havent heard before and i'll let u go. the old man then replied " years ago, a state trooper took off w/ my wife. i thought u were bring her back"

" Have a good day sir"

2006-06-29 09:05:36 · 39 answers · asked by hottie4eva153 1

first person that is in my state gets 10 points

2006-06-29 08:51:03 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-29 08:49:03 · 10 answers · asked by rachael h 1

It only takes one nail to hang a picture of Jesus.

2006-06-29 08:40:19 · 7 answers · asked by David D 4

2006-06-29 08:36:37 · 1 answers · asked by Anonymous

How else did they get so many smurfs?

2006-06-29 08:32:09 · 6 answers · asked by lrybio2006 2

Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

2006-06-29 08:28:06 · 6 answers · asked by wasuplat 2

He knocked on the door and asked the farmer to put him up for the night. The farmer told him that if he could creep quietly into the bed of his innocent sixteen year old daughter without wakening her, he could spend the night there.

Early the following morning, as the farmer was fixing breakfast, he heard and saw the salesman screaming and running from the farmhouse, trailing smoke from around his ***.

The farmer went to his daughters room to get an explaination.
She told him that she awoke to find a strange man in her bed playing with something between his legs. When she asked what it was he said it was his" wee duck " and would I like to play with it?
I did and it spat on me. So I smashed it's eggs, broke it's neck and set fire to it's nest!!!

2006-06-29 08:16:36 · 14 answers · asked by bill M 1

2006-06-29 08:16:14 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

With pointed fangs it sits in wait,
With piercing force its doles out fate,
Over bloodless victims proclaiming its might,
Eternally joining in a single bite.
What am I?

2006-06-29 08:13:51 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

10 points to the first correct answer

2006-06-29 08:12:55 · 22 answers · asked by Emy 2

2006-06-29 08:05:56 · 39 answers · asked by Anonymous

A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard. The
little
boy finds an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He
says, "Grandpa,
I bet I can put that worm back in that hole."

The grandfather replies, "I'll bet you five dollars you can't. It's
too
wiggly and limp to put back in that little hole."

The little boy runs into the house and comes back out with a can of
hair
spray. He sprays the worm until it is straight and stiff as a board.
Then
he puts the worm back into the hole.

The grandfather hands the little boy five dollars, grabs the hair
spray, and
runs into the house. Thirty minutes later the grandfather comes back
out and
hands the little boy another five dollars.

The little boy says, "Grandpa, you already gave me five dollars."

The grandfather replies, "I know. That's from your grandma."

2006-06-29 08:02:27 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous