Marriage & Divorce - 24 June 2007

I am dealing with a serious dilemna. I gave my heart and soul away 15 years ago to someone and never got it back. He left. Not for someone else, but he left because the stress from his family and mine took its toll. I got involved with another man, had a child, and eventually ended up marrying this man. I loved him, but I could never get over my first love. And we found each other recently, both realizing that we still love each other. I don't want to hurt my family, especially my children. But my heart belongs to someone else. I tried so many times to let him go, and he tried to let me go. But we are still very much in love with each other. My husband and I have always had problems not getting along...so my question is "Is this fate"? I know the cliche that if you love someone, let them go...and if they return, it is meant to be. But I do have a family...i don't know what to do....I am not a whore, or slut.....but my heart is not in my marriage anymore...and it probably never was.

2007-06-24 09:04:37 · 8 answers · asked by creamy2005 1

i stay because her mother can,t pay for her to marry some one else. so i,m thinking of her feelings . at the mean time i live hafe dead. what should i do. 4 years of marrage and we haven,t had real sex. only forplay. and i,m not a cheater and never will.it feel like she,s a friend not a wife. is there some wrong with me. from me a zomby.

2007-06-24 08:59:55 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-06-24 08:58:00 · 6 answers · asked by marieahawkins@btinternet.com 1

Long story short. My wife and I are 26, have been married almost 2 years, and together almost 7 years. Last year I found out that she was having an affair. I stood by her, even while she continues to have the affair, and she finally ended it with him, and we have been back together for a year since then. She says their relationship was not sexual at all. Her and I did not have sex before we were married, and that didn't improve much afterwards either. We have not had sex since January of 2006, which was right before the affair. We occasionaly "mess around", but not all that often. When we do, she very rarely lets me touch her or pleasure her. If I mak the first move, she says I'm pushy or annoying. If I ask, sh gets bothered. We also do not kiss at all, if I try, she moves away. I try to be romantic, helpful, all of that stuff, and nothing works, She finally realizes this is a problem and says she wants help. Any advice for me, or her would be greatly appreciated.

2007-06-24 08:54:40 · 23 answers · asked by I.M. Worried 1

Okay...this could get nasty....I really am trying to resolve my differances with my wife of nearly 19 years.This morning she says that we are not compatable. She also said that her therapist called me a controlling man...yet she told me on several occations that they (her & him) never discussed me in their sessions.Every day I question myself of why I work so hard to make this work. We are in therepy, and she says she still loves me. She just refuses to show any affection or remorce for her past actions.I do not want to do this...if I do, it will erase all efforts to reconcile. But if I don't, I will remain alone in my bed, and miserable. I asked my children what they want, and they said they want to see us work things out. But she remains sleeping on the couch in our living room, telling me the bed hurts her back, and that her brian won't let her. See my bio 4 details.
According to her, I have been sexually abusing her for years.Where does THAT come from?

Serve, or not to serve?

2007-06-24 08:40:29 · 26 answers · asked by not for now 2

My husband and I are nearly complete opposites. All is good in our marriage except for my willingness to -do as he says. I cannot tolerate being told what to do by him. He does 99% of the decisions and asks me for my input, most of the time he dismisses my input and does what he wants. Like for our sons birthday here yesterday, he planned when where decorations cake, everything by himself and I had no say in how it went. Last week he bought a car without telling me.
He gets on me for the littlest things and says they are important to him, no matter how insignificant they seem to me.

Yesterday he was watching our 2 yr old son, as I watched our 4yr old daughter and 6 month old at the park. The child he was watching completely fell in a slippery part and hit his head on cement. IF THAT would have happened under my care, my husband would have gone off on me saying I wasnt watching him well enough blah blah. But I dont do that to him...I feel angry, sad and unloved.

2007-06-24 08:10:07 · 11 answers · asked by SandLady 2

assault, to gain an advantage in court ? I heard many lawyers advise their female clients to make those claims, is that true ?

2007-06-24 08:03:34 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

when you've fallen out of love?

2007-06-24 07:53:16 · 9 answers · asked by kelly b 2

2007-06-24 07:52:46 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

Eleven years ago I adopted my son out to my daughters teacher and have regreted it ever sense, do I just leave it alone and hope he contacts me someday ???

2007-06-24 07:45:21 · 8 answers · asked by jdydewing 5

Has anyone ever been in a doomed marriage and then became pregant and you felt it gave you a 2nd chance to try and save your marriage?

2007-06-24 07:16:55 · 19 answers · asked by Jem 6

2007-06-24 06:52:27 · 28 answers · asked by kellitwigg 1

O.K, I really need some advice here. I have been happily married for 4 years. The other day while I was washing the dishes, my husband left his cell phone on the counter and it started ringing. I answered and it was some guy, I asked him for his name and if he wanted to leave a message. He told me his name was Andrew and then he just hung up. I really didn't think it was a big deal. That night I asked my husband who Andrew was and he told me an old coworker. I really didn't think anything about it and then he took the phone and ran upstairs. The following day, he came home from work really late, which he hasn't done in about 3 years. I asked him where he was and he couldn't answer me because he was stone cold drunk. Then a couple nights later he came home and then immediately brushed his teeth and took a shower when he got home. His clothes also smelled like man's cologne thats not his. What should I do, because I am very scared that he is cheating on me?

2007-06-24 06:48:26 · 35 answers · asked by Cara J 1

Ok, So I know this I am totally stupid for this... but I was hoping some Yahoo! users would have some advice for me to get over my fiancé’s ex-wife. Here is the whole story: We dated 7 years ago it was wonderful but due to me being young and un-experienced I didn't recognize the incredible thing I had (until I saw what else was out there). During our time apart he married someone else. He has been in the army the past five years and although had been with her for years, he really only spent a few months total with his ex-wife before he realized it wasn't working. He divorced her and a few months later told me he had always had feelings for me and since I felt the same, I thought everything would be perfect. So why isn't it! What is wrong with me? Why do I obsess over her so much? Why do I think about her when we are happy and together? Or whether they shared the same experience? I am really desperate please help I don't want this to go on. I have gone to couseling for a yr. no help :(

2007-06-24 06:45:56 · 27 answers · asked by Kimmy 1

I'm pretty sure the baby is mine, but my neighbor is so happy his wife is having "his" baby. She doesn't want to tell him it's not his, because it would expose our ongoing affair. One other problem is she and her husband are white, and I am black. Should I just keep my mouth shut and move away?

2007-06-24 06:44:15 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

doing a wise thing in life?

2007-06-24 06:19:32 · 8 answers · asked by truth set free 1

Further to my question yesterday about signing legal documents I hadn't gotten a chance to read.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ar_D1BejdDShea9ozXwm4gPty6IX?qid=20070623131735AAllfHv

I stood my ground and told him I wouldn't sign anything I hadn't read, and that even after reading it I may not sign it at all.

When he finally got home last night, he went up to our bedroom and removed all his clothing to the spare room and all his stuff from the onsuite bathroom to the one downstairs.

Time to see a lawyer huh? Or should I wait and let him make the first move ... this state takes into consideration things such as abandonment of the marriage and fault in general ...

Any advice?

2007-06-24 06:16:05 · 13 answers · asked by Chikadee 2

She mentioned my bad breath, flatulence and lack of personality, but I think these are side issues. Perhaps she wants me to woo her. I did try once, i bought her a wheelbarrow, but she wasn't impressed. Please help me to patch up our relationship.
Ps. We once tried counselling, but she head-butted the guy when he asked her about our sex life.

2007-06-24 06:13:20 · 16 answers · asked by Harold 1

2007-06-24 06:12:29 · 17 answers · asked by truth set free 1

My husband and I seperated 5-years ago. He find some chick on the internet. During the 5 years she has talked crap about me in front of my kids. I just don't like her for the simple fact of her being with my husband while we suppose to be working things out. My husband disowned the family for about a year and then finally got in touch with our kids.
My son graduated last thursday, having no control over who goes to the graduation she was there. I had a party yesterday at my house for his graduation and my ex-husband said I was being selfish because she is not welcome in my home. I can not help but have bad feelings when that lady is around me and surely did not want her at my house. And for my son, he does not care about her.
Was I really being selfish or is all of this about my ex-husband not being able to bring his girl friend?

2007-06-24 05:55:29 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous

This question is not intended to offend, so please no nasty answers please. I'm sincere in asking.
Why do people feel as if they need to sign that piece of paper and enter into a contract?
Why can't people just live like Goldie and Kurt and just love each other forever without the contract?

2007-06-24 05:17:25 · 16 answers · asked by getusedtoit 4

I am not dealing well with my fiance's exwife. They have children together and she just had a baby, but the father of that child wants nothing to do with her or the child. Now she is pushing this baby onto my fiance like it is his. She explained to him that it will not be fair for her other children to receive gifts, clothes and vacations from us and to leave the other child out. She also says they are siblings and she does not want them split up. Is this crazy thinking on her part or am I a b**tch?

2007-06-24 05:11:53 · 18 answers · asked by Tyra99 2

2007-06-24 05:07:55 · 10 answers · asked by Denice S 1

Our son started having emotional and behavioral problems about 12 years ago. My husband abandoned me last year for another woman whose children are raised. They are now married and living in another state. Our son continues to have problems. Looking back I have felt like a single Mom for all 12 years. As our son's problems increased, my husband pulled farther away. His traveling increased. When he would return home from one of his frequent trips,I would take the blame for handling all the sitiuations with our son the wrong way, even though he didn't want to get involved at the time it was happening. My ex is a "functioning alcoholic" so perhaps that's why. I believe he loves our son, but couldn't handle the problems. He continues to call our son every night and has since he left. He has also seen him. But he still doesn't want to hear about the problems. He just tells me I'm a poor mother when I approach the subject. Has anybody else experienced something similar?

2007-06-24 04:44:32 · 7 answers · asked by wc2ketey 3

2007-06-24 04:43:23 · 11 answers · asked by pitch 2

2007-06-24 04:40:21 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

my parents got divorced no there dating and they might get back together and i dont want them too. what do i do????

2007-06-24 04:26:47 · 1 answers · asked by softball_but_im_not_a_softy_!!!! 1

how do I nuetralize the super glue? should I leave her over this? will it lead to harsher punishment from her? help! I can't stand up straight because my knees are stuck in a fetal crouch!

2007-06-24 04:22:11 · 14 answers · asked by Dr. Bling 2

I married a wonderful man then divorced him because of guilt and my own way of sabotaging a relationship. Seems I can't handle someone actually trying to make me happy. Anyway, I am still in love with this man even though I remarried 8 yrs ago. I moved states away from him in 2001 and now I can't just go home whenever I want to. One time, when I did go home, I ran into his sister who proceeded in telling me that he was married again also. (as of 4 yrs ago) Whenever I go home I try to "run into him", but haven't succeeded. I am afraid of calling him for fear that he is still happy in his marriage and/or his wife will answer the phone. I thought about calling him at work, and will hopefully get the courage up to do that when my husband is sleeping. I dream of this man often, and am usually crying. I am obviously not happy in this marriage and want to go home. It will cost me a fortune to get there since I don't want to lose everything I own. I need help here!

2007-06-24 04:16:15 · 13 answers · asked by animal lover 2

God`s will?

2007-06-24 04:15:24 · 4 answers · asked by truth set free 1