Family & Relationships - 25 August 2007

My fiance and I recently came across the subject of porn in a conversation. I know he went through a phase when he was younger where he was addicted to porn and probably masturbated quite frequently. He's had a very troubled childhood and has come out surprisingly well, so I don't consider this a big mark in his past. However I asked him if he still pleasures himself and watch porn, and he says occasionally, when he's at home. He's has been staying with me and my family for the past several weeks, and can always come see me so I don't see the need for him to do this. It bothered me a little that he does this because he have a very healthy sex life (he is my first partner) even though he have to keep it very private since no one in my family except for my older sister knows that I'm sexually active (religious background). Anyway, I asked him if he wouldn't do it anymore and he didn't seem to have a problem with agreeing. But men: was I wrong to ask him that? Is it important to you?

2007-08-25 12:58:13 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

Last year, when I discovered my good friend/love interest was addicted to nicotine gum for the last nine years, I decided to help him out. He lives in another state, so I had him send his gum to me. I would mail him daily doses in attempt to wean him off the nicotine. We started out with 8 pieces per day, then 7, then 6...you get the picture. I bought the envelopes, stamps, etc. It took me a lot of time to package and address the envelopes and take them to the mail box... But last November, we succeeded and he was off the gum, supposedly. He whined and complained about the side effects of going off the gum the entire time. Anyway, we recently had a spat and he used three pieces of gum, and then I saw online where he has purchased gum again. Gum costs as much as cigarettes and that is one reason we were getting him off the gum. Anyway, my intuition is telling me he never quit the gum in the first place...or else why would he go back on it after being off it nearly a year?

2007-08-25 12:53:13 · 12 answers · asked by soul cyster ttc#1 3 in Friends

Here is the scenario. I’ve Been dating this girl for 7 months now. And has it’s moments but all in all been great! Even thinking of getting married. She came home after work and all of sudden said she was getting a hair cut shorter in the morning. Ok what ever. She got it cut looks great.

Walked in the kitchen she was text’n some one. I asked who’s that babe? She replied it was her friend, we’ll call “Jay”. From let say from “boon-town”. And she was going to meet up with him later to pick up some paper work from her previous divorce from, lets call him “Bob”. I’m not usually not the jealous type but I don’t think she wouldn’t of said anything if I didn’t ask

Well they were sending text messages back and fourth, what ever. Then after a little she went in the shower but grabbed her phone with her? Hmmm

After her shower we chit chat for a bit. Then she said she was going to blow dry her hair, and I saw she left her phone on the bed. I prob should go to hell for this but I looked at her text messages and she was not texting “Jay” she was texting “Bob” (ex-husband)! My heart dropped. I read a few of them one witch stood out saying she was volunteering till 3:30 (time I go to work) and asked if he wanted to meet up afterwards. None of the text said anything about divorce papers. HMMMMM


Well I was getting ready for work putting on my shoes at 3:30 time I normally leave she comes up and gives me a kiss and I ask her what she is up today? (Saturday) said she’s going to pick up the papers from “Jay” who lives in lets say “mo-town” and was going to see if she could pic them up in lets say “yo-town” (closer town) But as you recall she told me earlier he lived “boon-town”. I said nothing and just left.

Why would she lie to me? I don’t think she would cheat on me. Did she just want to see her e-x and didn’t want me to worry?

2007-08-25 12:49:39 · 15 answers · asked by butters 1 in Singles & Dating

blondes or brunettes?
or both?

2007-08-25 12:46:16 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

ok my ex bf broke up with me about 3 weeks ago saying he didn't see us working out anymore. I was soo devastated, we were together for a year and we were looking for apartments together a day before he broke up with me. Anyways, I saw him at a bar last night and he would not leave me alone. He kept saying how I ment so much to him and he wants to me friends with me, and doesn't want to be strangers with one another. How does he expect me to be friends with him after he broke my heart??

2007-08-25 12:46:09 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

i had it long b4 it was down to my ears and i cut it because my dad made me but this school ear i wanna have long again but he said you ready for a haircut tomorrow and i said no and he said if you dont im gonna take your computer away and i feel like im naked if i dont have my hair

2007-08-25 12:45:38 · 6 answers · asked by Elias S 1 in Family

2007-08-25 12:45:13 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

ok this is kind of comlicating but here it is:
this guy told my friends that he likes me a week ago and he still hasnt asked me me out b/c he doesnt know if i like him but I wont see him till tuesday so how should i text him and say i like him too besides just saying: "i like you" thannks

2007-08-25 12:42:41 · 1 answers · asked by coloradogirl21 3 in Singles & Dating

so theres this really cute guy whom i have never hung out with but he lives close by and i talk to him on the internet. he wants me to call him...and i want to, but i wouldn't know what to say!
help!

2007-08-25 12:39:43 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

After all he did, he doesnt deserve to be happy.

2007-08-25 12:38:13 · 16 answers · asked by kristy s 1 in Marriage & Divorce

2007-08-25 12:37:42 · 5 answers · asked by daveslady992003 1 in Family

It's not like he drinks or cheats, etc.I have been in a marriage of 5 years and now sadly see how it dies away. I am surrounded by books about passive-agressive people, how to feel good, etc. I don't know how to talk to my husband any more as I've tried different ways with little success. The last time, perhaps, it was the wrong place to talk - the restaurant, so he gave out to me about it. Today he told me that we could eat out if it does not end up like the previous time - in other words, he wants me to keep my mouth shut about our issues. We've been to a counsellor, and he went for 6 sessions until he withdrew himself by saying that he did not like the woman and that a lot was about his issues. Tonight I will go to bed like 3 years before, knowing that intimacy has died between us (thanks God, because even the thought of it with him would make me panic now). It's hard to let go since it's not like it's about alcoholism, but more so about his sulking and emotional abuse.

2007-08-25 12:36:02 · 14 answers · asked by Alyssa Macey 3 in Marriage & Divorce

i made the BIGGEST mistake of my life.
i was hanging out with some friends, and we were just at some park, not really doing anything...
but, one of my friends is friends with my best friend's boyfriend.
we were talking about casual things, until we went for a walk outside of the group, and he kissed me.
i knew in my head that it was wrong, but i kissed back anyway.
and i liked...no LOVED it.
how do i tell my boyfriend AND my best friend without them getting totally mad at me, and taking me away from their lives?
we all make mistakes, right?

2007-08-25 12:35:09 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

I just got hired at the North Pole & Santa assigned me to getting him a list of all the naughty & nice girls. Could all of you girls let me know which category you fall into.

2007-08-25 12:34:42 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

my mum has been with this guy now for 13 years. He does not understand when she is telling lies when she is drunk. the thing is i came home tonight after 3 fosters after my mum coming to my mates house being abusive to me saying i will be locked out after 12 midnight. I then go home and my mums boyfriend has this baseball bat and he was going to go round there and beat people with it. whats the point? i then get a mood with him coz he was shouting at me. So i threw my keys at this clock on the fish tank. i see where they landed... when i went back they was not there. Here is them thinking im drunk. how the hell can u be drunk on 3 fosters? anyway we got into a argument about the keys. My mum i know took them because i remember insidence like this before. Ive even been arrested before by the police for their doings and ive took the blame for it. They are even saying **** about my mates 2 doors away from me and they aint done nothing wrong only what they assume.latr she deny where keys.r

2007-08-25 12:26:15 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family

2007-08-25 12:23:53 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

His good traits
1.loving/devoted dad(his child from 1st marrage)
2.supporting exhusband(takes "the high road" with his ex for his son's sake)
3.no drugs/drinking
4.hard worker/good job
5.smart/clean cut
Ok sounds good right? now for the 'bad traits"
1.history of cheating(left wife for old gf then left old gf for me)
2.temper(never hit me but can sware and yell alot)
3.has crazy/controlling exwife
4.money issues(asked me to pay off his debt once 25k and did the if you love me you would do it)
5.has to be reminded of my b-day/valentines day(we went "dutch" on both these days)
6.In the 5 yrs i got flowers once.

2007-08-25 12:20:58 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Family & Relationships

my lawyer said it could be awhile before its final... i live by myself and have been going out and meeting lots of poeple . is it right to say i'm single now.... (((( i just want to get on with my life..))))

2007-08-25 12:18:53 · 28 answers · asked by michaelpz76 2 in Marriage & Divorce

I quit a high pay job to be home with our child and my husband in turn took a high paying job and now supports us. I do work part time but don't make a lot of money. I wanted to take a break to spend time with child before she starts school. Now he seems to have attitude and acts as if I have to do what he says because he makes the money. He is stingy and keeps money in a personal savings while i scrape the joint account for grocery money. I supported us at one point too and NEVER acted like that. I plan on working full time again when our daughter goes to school full time. Why is he acting like this?

2007-08-25 12:08:51 · 23 answers · asked by Samantha 3 in Marriage & Divorce

Okay the last girl I tryed getting lead me on. Boy was I hurt when I found out she didn't like me like that! So now I'm talking to this new girl and little stuff like her not calling me back one time makes me think she doesn't like me. But she hugs me and talks to me and waves at me. But still I have dout's all the time and it hinders me from being myself around her. I feel I'm never on the same page as the girl I want to be with. Can you please help me?

2007-08-25 12:08:22 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

like i mean do they like girls with meat on there bones or liek modle skinny and what kind of personality trates do you find attractive. p.s now STUPID ANSWERS OR GUYS THAT THINK THERE FUNNY BY SAYING STUPID THINGS I WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS THINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-08-25 12:07:36 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

it's been 5 days now. i didnt realize i actually love him and still do. i can't get over it. and i have mixed feelings baout the way he looks at me now. he's been avoiding sort of. but anyway, how can i casually suggest that he and i get back together?

2007-08-25 12:03:08 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

My husband's friend is now staying with us. (on our couch).

He is eating meals with us, watching cable tv, has access to the internet.

I feel he should contribute something financially, but want to know what sounds reasonable.

thanks in advance for any input!

2007-08-25 12:00:32 · 6 answers · asked by tweetymay 6 in Friends

when i kiss a girl or more like if a make out with a girl i like to put my hands through their hair and all that good stuff but i was owndering if i were to be making out with a black girl could i run my hands through her hair or not. i ask because of two reasons .

1. because they normaly have weave or somthign like that
2. because they are usually sooooooo touvhy about their hair

i just want a heads up for when i make out with a blak honey

2007-08-25 12:00:08 · 24 answers · asked by raul b 2 in Singles & Dating

I have friend but eather thay don't seem like ther normal selvs or they are ingroing me. (intenchinal or no I don't know) but any way how do I know if they are still my friends any more?

2007-08-25 11:59:40 · 7 answers · asked by me 2 in Friends

i'm rio (short for fiorella). i'm 17, 1/2 italian 1/2 brazilian. im 5'6 and i have long brown hair + hazel eyes. haha so i was just wondering, would you?

2007-08-25 11:56:57 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

my boyfriend has cheated on me in our relationship and I don't know if I should stay with him. i forgave him but I'm scared he will do it again. I worry everyday and I cry all the time but I love him with all my heart. Should I stay with him even though its making me cry and worry all the time?

2007-08-25 11:56:45 · 19 answers · asked by TawnyLee 2 in Singles & Dating

I have been married to a man who seems to not want to ever be home. He tries to sell the idea that all men go out two to three times a night after work to the store, the video store, to the office, to call there mom or whatever there is always an excuse and if i say anything then he starts with how i am being unreasonable. I finally asked him how many days has he not gone out at least once. He could only come up with three total. He will even go out during a blizzard. He says he needs time to his thoughts. I said well i never have that luxery since i must take care of our 1 year old daughter. I can not come and go as I please. He tells me how i take so much for granted.. But is he not taking the ability to come and go for granted. I am tiered of feeling like home is a hit and run. Home is to eat and sleep and maybe catch a show he likes. Outside of that he would rather be somewhere else. He says i am parinoid. My perspective is wrong. That all men do this.

2007-08-25 11:55:52 · 10 answers · asked by dreamsofinsomnia 3 in Other - Family & Relationships

she use to be a sex addict and wanna do it every second but now she does not want to do it all the time she says she wants to just go to places with me to like the movies mall and stuff like that WAT DOES THIS MEAN HELP ME PLZZ!!!

2007-08-25 11:54:34 · 16 answers · asked by YEAHH!!! MAN!!! 1 in Singles & Dating

They are all just idiots. I have this friend named Janae, just todsy i went to her and asked for her advice about something and she got all mad and cussed me out. Whay KINDA FRIEND is that?? Then my other friend Angela, she stole her friend named Mercedes boyfriend, and her behavior is just stupid why are my freinds so dumb?? why cant i find a good friend?? i cant stand girls. THEY ARE ALL SO PETTY!!!

2007-08-25 11:51:22 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Friends