Jokes & Riddles - February 2007

She was so proud of it, she had it bronzed!

2007-02-08 18:11:08 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

'live' spelled backward, is 'Evil'

2007-02-08 18:11:04 · 6 answers · asked by Ms. Q & A 3

A man was found murdered on Sunday morning. His wife immediately called the police. The police questioned the wife and staff and got these alibis:
The Wife said she was sleeping.
The Cook was cooking breakfast.
The Gardener was picking vegetables.
The Maid was getting the mail.
The Butler was cleaning the closet.

The police instantly arrested the murdered. Who did it and how did they know?

2007-02-08 18:02:55 · 11 answers · asked by NU JERZY MAMA 2

FINISHED FILES ARE THE
RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC
STUDY COMBINED WITH THE
EXPERIENCE OF YEARS

2007-02-08 17:53:29 · 31 answers · asked by Angry Johnny 2

I haven't got it, I Don't want it, wouldn't have it.But if I had it I wouldn't part with it for the whole world. What is it?

2007-02-08 17:41:54 · 18 answers · asked by Chipilona 6

he is both sex

2007-02-08 17:39:14 · 7 answers · asked by Ms. Q & A 3

2007-02-08 17:36:09 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

They both come on little white crackers.

2007-02-08 17:28:10 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

Two flies are on a pile of poop, one fly farts

The second fly looks at him and says, do you mind, I'm eating!

2007-02-08 17:27:33 · 2 answers · asked by nmp948 4

A headless man had a letter to write;

It was read by a man who had lost his sight.

The dumb repeated it word for word;

And deaf was he who listened and heard.



Solve this riddle.

2007-02-08 17:19:25 · 2 answers · asked by Chipilona 6

on perfectly flat firing range, if a soldier holds a rifle 6 feet (1.8m) off the ground, and fires a bullet horizontally and drops a second bullet from his hand at the same height as the barrel of the gun, which bullet will hit the ground first?

2007-02-08 17:19:00 · 9 answers · asked by jun_matsumoto_gokus3n 2

its at the beginning of a train, its at the end of a train, the train doesnt need it but it cant go without it.....what it is???

i'll tell u in a few days

2007-02-08 17:15:16 · 19 answers · asked by ♥PaIgE♥ 3

acne doesn't come on your face till your 12 !!!

2007-02-08 17:14:51 · 10 answers · asked by that b puss 3

not being retarded.............

2007-02-08 17:11:54 · 6 answers · asked by that b puss 3

A woman shoots her husband.
Then she holds him under water for over 5 minutes.
Finally, she hangs him.
But 5 minutes later they both go out together and enjoy a wonderful dinner together.
How can this be?

2007-02-08 17:06:47 · 26 answers · asked by ® Espresso ® 4

2007-02-08 17:04:28 · 5 answers · asked by surbhidiplomat 3

lol...sry

2007-02-08 17:01:07 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

One has hope in her soul.

2007-02-08 16:52:32 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

But can't be Tuesday, Thursday, or Saturday!

First person 10 pts!

2007-02-08 16:50:19 · 14 answers · asked by Boondocksaint 4

no flush it like normal people

2007-02-08 16:48:49 · 12 answers · asked by conan 4

a man is asks his friend how he would explain logic. the man says "well, do you have a lawn mower?"
the friend says "yes"
"then by that logic, you have a lawn"
"yeah your right"
"and if you have a lawn you must have a house"
"yes"
"then you must have a wife to have a house"
"well yes i do"
"and you must have sex with her"
"of course"
"then logically, you heterosexual"
"oh, ok thanks, i think i get it"
the next day the guy is going to visit another one of his friends, he tells him about how he learned what logic is, so his friend says "ok whats logic?"
he says "do you have a lawn mower"
"no"
"then your gay"

2007-02-08 16:43:15 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

131-228-331-???

what's the next sequence of number

hint: don't think too hard, not math

2007-02-08 16:43:05 · 20 answers · asked by jirachi3636 2

~~~Blonde Joke #1~~~~
A blonde was knitting while driving a car.The policeman yelled "Pull Over!"
"No",she cried,it's a scarf"
~~~Blonde Joke #2~~~~
10 blondes and 1 brunette were climbing a mountain- realizing there was too much pressure, the brunette gave a speech about letting go of the rope to save everyone else's life.
The blondes aplauded.
~~~Blonde Joke #3~~~~
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are out robbing sheds when a policeman finds them.They all jump into various sacks.The policeman whacks the redhead's sack with a stick and she replies "Woof woof!"
Again, the policeman does it to the brunette. He hears "Mew,mew!"
The policeman whacks the third sack.
The blonde yells "Potatos!"
~~~Blonde Joke #4~~~~
A blonde hits a truck driver on the innerstate and pulls her over to an empty lot.He draws a circle and tells her not to leave it for any reason.The truck driver keys her brand-new car.
The blond giggles.He slashes her tires.The blonde giggles.He smashes her

2007-02-08 16:40:44 · 6 answers · asked by qųěęŋ ŏf ħęãŗţş 3

there are three female cannibals and with them, their 3 kids. We'll call them Cannibal A,kid A; cannibal B, kid B; cannibal C, kid C. They' re tryna cross a river but their boat can only take 2 at a time. Mothers cannot eat their own kid but they'll feast on another's kid, if she wasn't present. How will they get across the river? I'll post the answer after a couple of days. Good for people who like to analyze stuff.. remember, the boat can only fit 2 people at a time and if a mother leaves her child, the other mothers will eat him. Also, the kids aren't cannibals yet so they can't try to eat one another......well, goodluck

2007-02-08 16:21:55 · 23 answers · asked by Blak Jesus 2

theres this older man very druuunnkkk.... he wasnt walking properly & just all messed up. a cop was just riding around the area and saw this drunk man so he drove by slowly just checkin him out... so the drunk man went 2 cross the street when his damn foot got stuck in a hole from the sewer... he kinda struggled...(of course he dunt have much strength) but there he is tryin n tryin... the cop saw him from his rear view mirror so he did a u turn & got out the car 2 him & said " excuse me sir..i must take u in b-cuz ur very drunk" the man replied "excuse me sir how do u kno im drunk?" the cop said "b-cuz ur a mess n ur breath smells lyke liqour" the man said "oh thank god im drunk officer..i thought i was crippled"




lmao omg i died wen i 1st heard dat 1

2007-02-08 16:21:48 · 5 answers · asked by NU JERZY MAMA 2

2007-02-08 16:16:04 · 5 answers · asked by qųěęŋ ŏf ħęãŗţş 3

A little boy was walking through town one day. The boy came across an old man with no teeth. The boy was scared at first, but then smiled and said: "I feel your pain."


lol lol lol lol.....Funny huh?

2007-02-08 16:11:14 · 7 answers · asked by Baptized Disciple 5

please help me i have til 8am tomorrow to solve this!!!

100 keys..but only 1 unlock the door..what are the other 99 used for?

2007-02-08 16:10:41 · 10 answers · asked by needsomehelpplz 1

Laura is 67 inches. Laura is 74 inches. How is this possible?

2007-02-08 15:56:01 · 8 answers · asked by qųěęŋ ŏf ħęãŗţş 3

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?" The bartender considers it, then agrees. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, and proceeds to play the blues.
After the man finished his drink, he asked the bartender, "If I show you an even better trick, will you give me free drinks for the rest of the evening?" The bartender agrees, thinking that no trick could possibly be better than the first. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out the tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles again, and proceeds to play the blues. The man reaches into another pocket and pulls out a small bullfrog, who begins to sing along with the rat's music.

2007-02-08 15:53:41 · 6 answers · asked by *♥short~sh!t♥* 3