Jokes & Riddles - October 2006

I will choose the person with the first correct answer.

2006-10-09 13:56:32 · 14 answers · asked by Graybeard 2

1.shaving your head,or only shaving your legs once a year?
2.eating a gallon of black eyed peas,or only listening to the black eyed peas forever?
3.being trapped on a deserted island alone,or being trapped on a deserted island with your worst enemy?
4.being trapped in a bathroom for 24 hours,or being without a bathroom for 24 hours?

2006-10-09 13:28:36 · 27 answers · asked by nobody 3

It takes one man 30 minutes to fill a bath with water how long will it take two?

2006-10-09 13:24:59 · 16 answers · asked by terry d 1

2006-10-09 13:22:08 · 20 answers · asked by terry d 1

A frog in the throat or a toad in the hole?

2006-10-09 13:20:01 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

in the woods and no one is around, does it make a sound?

wouldn't a good answer be to put a video camera in the woods and watch a tree fall and hear if it makes a sound? I think its a good answer

2006-10-09 13:19:33 · 13 answers · asked by .::country gurl in a 4X4::. 2

A couple have been happily married for 6 years ,they have 2 young children.Because of the children they decided to have a code word if they wanted to have some adult fun,the code word was "washing machine".Last night in bed he snuggled close to his wife and whispered "washing machine" into her ear,she said not tonight so he turned his back on her(as all men do) in a huff,but 5 mins later she must have felt bad cause of all his huffing and puffing and whispered "washing machine" into his ear.He turned round to face her and said "its ok dear it was a small load and i done it by hand"..........


Kermanzo has left the building ...don't 4get to take a look at my other jokes(3 funny and 1 dodgy)

2006-10-09 13:18:48 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

What word can you form from the word ICE AND OUT?
Clue:
It is very important for us especially when getting a good job.

2006-10-09 13:05:11 · 13 answers · asked by Mr T 4

2006-10-09 12:49:24 · 6 answers · asked by marypmcg 1

After no dates or sex for 5 years a woman goes 2 see a chinese sex therapist Dr Chang....He says " take off all your clothes ,get down and crawl reery reery fast to otha side of room"....she does...."ok craw back reery reey fast bac "....As she did this Dr Chang shook his head "your problem very very bad,worse case of Ed Zachery disease i have ever seen,i see why you get no dates"....She says "oh no whats Ed Zachery disease"....Dr Chang replies " its when your face looks Ed Zachery like your backside"

2006-10-09 12:28:13 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-10-09 12:25:16 · 16 answers · asked by wlove 2

i only know one good one

what did the blonde say when she looked into a box of cheerios?



ooh look donut seeds!!! lol

2006-10-09 12:10:40 · 10 answers · asked by Erikawithasmile 4

a brunette who told to many blonde jokes

2006-10-09 12:07:09 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-10-09 12:05:00 · 5 answers · asked by jims_prettyeyes 2

2006-10-09 12:03:47 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

Girl takes a dress in to a dry cleaners and asks for it to be cleaned.The man is partly deaf and says "come again".Girl blushes and replies "NO its yoghurt this time!!!!!!"

2006-10-09 11:58:05 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-10-09 11:51:47 · 36 answers · asked by fivelighters 4

Tell me ur best dirty but funny jokes. Please dont report anyone for these jokes, if you feel your joke is too offensive then send it to me in my profile lol. All things go here... religion, gays, straights, mentally handicapped, all challengers welcome. Baby jokes are encouraged.

2006-10-09 11:51:32 · 6 answers · asked by Ray 3

2006-10-09 11:41:35 · 21 answers · asked by jims_prettyeyes 2

Because they don't like to look at disappointed women

2006-10-09 11:40:09 · 10 answers · asked by barrettins 3

2006-10-09 11:39:31 · 12 answers · asked by blkjacky 1

In a small cathedral a janitor was cleaning the pews between services when he was approached by the minister. The minister asked the janitor, "Could you go into the confessional and listen to confessions for me? I really have to go to the bathroom and the Widow McGee is coming. She tends to go on but never really does anything worthy of serious repentance, so when she's done just give her 10 Hail Mary's and I'll be right back."

Being the helpful sort, the janitor agreed. Just as expected the Widow McGee came into the booth and started her confession. "Oh Father, I fear I have done the unforgivable. I have given into carnal thoughts and have had oral sex."

Stunned, the janitor had no idea how to handle this situation. Surely 10 Hail Mary's would not do. So, in a moment of desperation the janitor peered his head out of the confessional and asked an altar boy, "Son, what does the minister give for oral sex?"

In reply the altar boy said, "Two Snickers bars and a Coke."

2006-10-09 11:36:53 · 9 answers · asked by cheeks the slick 2

2006-10-09 11:35:54 · 21 answers · asked by jims_prettyeyes 2

2006-10-09 11:27:07 · 32 answers · asked by fivelighters 4

Did you guys know that yahoo is the best place to meet some great comedians?

2006-10-09 11:16:31 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

Little Johnny came home from school with a note from his teacher saying that Johnny was having trouble telling the difference between boys and girls, and would his mother please sit down and have a talk with Johnny about this.

So Johnny's mother takes him quietly by the hand upstairs to her bedroom, and closes the door.

"First, Johnny, I want you to take off my blouse", she said, so Johnny unbuttons her blouse and takes it off.

"OK, now take off my skirt", and he takes off her skirt.

"Now take off my bra", which he does.

"And now, Johnny, please take off my panties".

Johnny finishes removing these too.

His mother then says, "Johnny, please don't wear any of my clothes to school anymore!"

2006-10-09 11:16:30 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-10-09 11:14:39 · 18 answers · asked by fivelighters 4

If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.



With me, nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now, we'll never see each other!



My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met!



My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair.



The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.



When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.



I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.

2006-10-09 10:55:25 · 9 answers · asked by cheeks the slick 2

So, I have a neighbor who's last name is Mr. Rehak. Can anyone come up with a funny name like Mr. Relapse. or better.

2006-10-09 10:54:21 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-10-09 10:40:27 · 18 answers · asked by fivelighters 4