Jokes & Riddles - June 2006

need answers to these questions. its for a school project

1. what branch of the arm forces where newborn babies qualify?
2. what has 3 feet but cant walk?
3. what advice would you tell your softball players who cannot reach first base?
4. What type of a test even infants enjoy responding?
5. A man was born in the Philippines, educated in Canada, married in India and died in Australia. Who is the man?
6. What has fifty feet bu cant walk?
7. The first inventor of the carriage?
8. What personal asset you have which is being abused by others?

2006-06-27 03:27:52 · 7 answers · asked by rydhel1016 3

if u have nothing to do then plz come for chatting with me.or plz write small jokes for me.

2006-06-27 03:25:21 · 4 answers · asked by cool_ranjan4all 2

because they always pull out with no care of who else might be coming!

2006-06-27 03:20:37 · 21 answers · asked by SAMANTHA D 1

2006-06-27 03:01:12 · 27 answers · asked by lenamarie 1

Did you know that heaven and hell are actually
right next to each other? They are seperated by
a big chain-link fence. Well, one day hell was
having a big party and it got a little out of
hand. God heard the ruckus and arrived to find
his fence completely smashed by the wild
partiers. He called the devil over and said
'Look, Satan, you have to rebuild this fence.'

Satan agreed. The next day God noticed that the
devil had completely rebuilt the fence...but it
was 2 feet further into heaven than before.

'Satan!' beckoned God. 'You have to take that
fence down and put it back where it belongs!'

'Yeah? What if I don't?' replied the devil.

'I'll sue you if I have to,' answered God.

'Sure,' laughed Satan 'where are you going to
find a lawyer?'

2006-06-27 02:59:52 · 12 answers · asked by simply_boring 4

2006-06-27 02:52:06 · 6 answers · asked by simply_boring 4

A teacher decides that she is going to teach her second grade class a
new word today. She tells them that the word is "definitely" and its
meaning is "absolute, positive, without a doubt."

She asks the class if anyone can think of a sentence with the word in
it. She calls on little Susan who is in the back raising her hand,
quite sure of herself.

Susan stands up and says, "The sky is definitely blue."

The teacher replies to her, "Well, that's a good sentence but
sometimes the sky is gray, and sometimes its cloudy, and sometimes
its red and pink so the sky is not definitely blue. Anyone else?"

Tom's hand flies up and she calls on him.

Tom answers, "The water is definitely clear."

"Well, Tom that's a good sentence but sometimes the water is muddy,
and sometimes it's green, and sometimes it's full of seaweed so it's
not definitely clear. Anyone else?"

Finally, in the far corner, little Robert s

2006-06-27 02:46:12 · 19 answers · asked by simply_boring 4

i know it is in the wrong category ... but i want the answer from u ppl at jokes n riddles.... n yeah ... definitely u can b imaginative to annnnny extend

2006-06-27 02:41:37 · 11 answers · asked by simply_boring 4

Why do Yahoo Avatars come only in thin sizes, i know a lot of people that have an avatar are fat, so why doesn't yahoo give the option of making your avatar fat like them?

2006-06-27 02:34:19 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-27 02:32:47 · 14 answers · asked by Eulercrosser 4

2006-06-27 02:30:08 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

Heres a good question up here

Personally Im more of a lone wolf, when a fully pledged christian ( baptism ) I will likely feel like a "Wolf in sheeps clothing" I dont have many friends. I feel so alone, even when Im not, am currently in search of a mate, meaning courtship/ Flirting I feel like I dont belong anywhere... Get it

Now you Try, give it a go, yes it can be mythical!

2006-06-27 02:03:45 · 26 answers · asked by Michael Daniel 2

What is the most hilarious quote/saying u have ever herd....mine would be "grow your own dope...plant a man" - cracks me up everytime!! Come on people, share the humour! :D

2006-06-27 02:01:45 · 11 answers · asked by Miss Terious 3

A little girl runs into her house, tears running down her face. She races up to her mother and says,
"Mum, Mum, can I have a glass of cider?"
"Why on earth do you want cider?" asks her confused and concerned mother.
"To take the pain away," sobs the little girl.
Obviously the mother refuses, but the girl keeps on crying and eventually her mother pours her a glass of cider in an attempt to shut her up. The little girl grabs the glass and immediately puts her hand into it.
"It doesn't work," screams the little girl.
"What do you mean?" asks her mother.
"Well," sniffs the little girl, "I overheard my sister saying that whenever she gets a prick in her hand she can't wait to get it in cider."

2006-06-27 01:52:42 · 7 answers · asked by c_o_e_u_s 2

Tep on da bwakes

2006-06-27 01:51:42 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

EXcuses to use if you're caught napping at work:

"I wasn't sleeping. I was trying to pick up contact lens without hands."

2006-06-27 01:48:35 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

...he takes the lift all the way down but when he returns he only takes the lift to the 85th and walks the rest of the way by stairs? (10 points for the right answer!)

2006-06-27 01:15:02 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

Ok, this is a yes/no question....

"Will your answere to this question be no?"

confused? :P if you know people who are always right, help them to discover new things! Confuse them!

2006-06-27 00:59:50 · 9 answers · asked by beffudled4life 1

2006-06-27 00:31:40 · 11 answers · asked by blueblast66 1

2006-06-27 00:13:09 · 3 answers · asked by jagjug 1

A man left home running. He ran a ways and then turned left, ran the same distance and turned left again, ran the same distance and turned left again. When he got home there were two masked men. Who were they?

2006-06-27 00:10:42 · 18 answers · asked by ~p♥kes~ 5

Hatch.......finish for 10.

2006-06-27 00:01:28 · 12 answers · asked by ~p♥kes~ 5

2006-06-26 23:56:21 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous

A lady walks into a BMW dealership. She browses around, then spots the perfect car - a MBW M3 and walks over to inspect it.

As she bends to feel the fine leather upholstery, a loud fart escapes her. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and hopes a sales person doesn't pop up right now. As she turns around, there standing next to her is a salesman.

"Good day, Madam How may we help you today?"
Very uncomfortably she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?"

He answers, "Madam, if you farted just touching it, you are going to crap your yourself when you hear the price!"

2006-06-26 23:46:56 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous

I am the clue.......(wiltar can't answer)

2006-06-26 23:37:46 · 13 answers · asked by ~p♥kes~ 5

2006-06-26 23:36:52 · 11 answers · asked by dogfishperson 3

I come in different shapes and sizes. Parts of me are curves, others are straight. You can put me anywhere you like, but there is only one right place for me.
What am I?

2006-06-26 23:14:38 · 15 answers · asked by gabbyx19 2

draw, type..something....:)

2006-06-26 23:10:09 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-06-26 22:52:33 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous

A snake and a rabbit were racing along a pair of
intersecting forest pathways one day, when they
collided at the point where the pathways meet.
They immediately began to argue with one another
as to who was at fault for the mishap. When the
snake remarked that he had been blind since
birth, and thus should be given additional
leeway, the rabbit said that he, too, had been
blind since birth. The two animals then forgot
about the collision and began commiserating
concerning the problems of being blind. The snake
said that his greatest regret was the loss of his
identity. He had never been able to see his
reflection in water, and for that reason did not
know exactly what he looked like, or even what he
was. The rabbit declared that he had the same
problem.

Seeing a way that they could help each other,
the rabbit proposed that one feel the other from
head to toe, and then try to describe what the
other animal was. The snake agreed, and started
by winding himself around the rabbit. After a
few moments, he announced, 'You've got very soft,
fuzzy fur, long ears, big rear feet, and a little
fuzzy ball for a tail. I think that you must be a
bunny rabbit!' The rabbit was much relieved to
find his identity, and proceeded to return the
favor to the snake. After feeling about the
snake's body for a few minutes, he asserted,
'Well, you're scaly, you're slimy, you've got
beady little eyes, you squirm and slither all
the time, and you've got a forked tongue.
I think you're a lawyer!'

2006-06-26 22:02:30 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous