Family & Relationships - 14 August 2007

I was in a very abusive relationship. Both physical but more so mentally. My wife was abused as a child and brought those dynamics into the house. I tried everything to make it work. the rules kept changing, she couldn't control her temper or whatever came out of her mouth, and sometimes things would come flying at me. i knew that if i touched her, i would be the one charged with domestic violence. Finally she left. I was relieved at first but notice that i suffered a lot of trauma. i was beaten down emotionally and am just now noticing that my self esteem and confidence really took a beating by staying in it. i was married though so i was determined to make it work. now i'm paying the price. i feel like i was in a war zone now that i'm out of it. what's the best way to get over it?

2007-08-14 07:26:06 · 26 answers · asked by survivor 1 in Marriage & Divorce

Ive been a stay at hope wife for several months. I do all the cooking cleaning and laundry and care for our puppy. I don't have a problem with that at all. The problem is, every single day when he arrives home from his job, he throw his shoes one way, his pants the other, he leave lights on, The pitcher out on the counter, basically what im getting at, is the man is a walking mess and destroys my hard work i do each day. I tried hinting to him that if he could just put his shoes away and hand me the clothes he doesnt want. Because i work hard to make the house lovely. I explained that it would be like me going out and shopping with no regard with his hard earned money. Its rude, and him just messing up my work is like the same to me. I need another approach to him, b.c he says " i don't care if it looks good, if it bothers you, clean up after me" But if he ever came home to a messy house he would complain. Thanks for any help!

2007-08-14 07:21:54 · 9 answers · asked by Sunshine 2 in Marriage & Divorce

2007-08-14 07:21:37 · 1 answers · asked by Carmelo C 1 in Other - Family & Relationships

We have been together like forever but I found out my fiance likes guys and for the past year he won't have sex with me, could he be gay?He wants to get married but I think he could just be hiding behind me fearing to come out of the closet. We have two kids together what should I do?

2007-08-14 07:19:44 · 30 answers · asked by Michele N 1 in Singles & Dating

I've seen a lot of male bashing on here. It seems that a lot of women think they're always right and don't think about what they are doing/not doing that is affecting their marriage.

How many people actually made personal changes within themselves like being more understanding, cooking home cooked meals more, giving back rubs, listening more, whatever. You get what i'm saying.

What have you done to help your marriage before you decided a divorce was in your future?

2007-08-14 07:17:07 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

Just spent £540 on a ring - am I a skin-flint or is that the going rate?

2007-08-14 07:13:11 · 32 answers · asked by andrewjohnmcjohn 2 in Weddings

My husband has a bad habit of bringing up is ex-wife and momma in conversations.
He'll say something like; "my ex-wife knows "what ever it may be" about me....my momma knows this about me and you know this about me". It pisses me off to hear "my-ex and my momma". I understand he's trying to make a point but I hate it. Should I let it ride or should I tell'em how I really feel..."who gives a f*** about them and what they know about you"...that's what I really want to say when he does that.

2007-08-14 07:11:54 · 11 answers · asked by I am what I am 4 in Marriage & Divorce

Just wait until he finds a different girl who gives him all the attention he desires... then what?

2007-08-14 07:11:29 · 6 answers · asked by ? 3 in Singles & Dating

ive been alone for 21 years i could of had more than 200 relation ships but i always backed away from it cause something keeped on telling me adam she is not for you .... the girl of my dreams is she out there somewhere or did i meet her but never noticed she was the one?

2007-08-14 07:11:16 · 8 answers · asked by dicaprio_xx 1 in Singles & Dating

ok my best freind(is a guy) well he spent the night at this familys house that was his grandmas freind...for fourth of july and the daughter snuck ito the bed with him and...well you know what i mean....and he didn't know her at all...they just met her that day...do you thank that he's really in love or just that he's blinded becasue she did it with him???
i'm in love with him and i was just wondering...

2007-08-14 07:09:30 · 36 answers · asked by got.to.get.over.him. =] 2 in Singles & Dating

This is going to be kind of long:

My mom is a black muslim apart of the Nation of Islam (NOI) and she's trying to pressure me into being apart of it. It was never really a problem until I got to the age of 13 because they are super strict, you can't have a boyfriend (and I have one) and you can't wear tight or short clothes (and I do so and I like exposing my body). And they have some crazy beliefs like the white man is the devil and I don't believe that at all.

This has torn me and my mom apart. She's knows nothing about me and vice versa. What should I do?

2007-08-14 07:09:14 · 22 answers · asked by {*Kiterya A.k.A Ms Caramel*} 5 in Family

This would be on our first lunch date. There is a little eatery here in town that specializes in gourmet hotdogs.

2007-08-14 07:06:06 · 4 answers · asked by paul67337 7 in Singles & Dating

He admits to not being able to give me the affection and attention that I desire/need, says he just "can't do it". He has been to therapy alone and with me as well but it hasn't helped. Do I TRY to learn to live without these things or do I leave him and try to find it elsewhere eventually? I have been so lonely for 6 years now that I have cheated on him several times due to the sheer need to be touched, desired, and wanted. We have two young kids together and he is a great father, but not the kind of husband that I feel that I need. Is it selfish to leave him considering he isn't abusing me or anything like that?

2007-08-14 07:02:58 · 31 answers · asked by lonelywife513 1 in Marriage & Divorce

So i've finally decided that im going to have a backyard wedding. The backyard is really nice and it actually consists of 2 part. One part with be where the ceremony takes place, and the 2nd part will be where the reception takes place. I have found a caterer, but I ws wonder (roughly) how much it really costs to have a backyard wedding. Anyone had one before? How much did you end up spending?

2007-08-14 07:01:14 · 15 answers · asked by Noah's Mommy 4 in Weddings

i am stating my real problem so please only serious persons answer this

i saw a girl who was disturbed with her husband and i like her from the day i have seen her first. she told me that her husband is not doing sex with her. i asked her that i can do that with her.
she agreed and we made sex twice or thrice.
after some weeks she declined to do sex with me, as her husband has started doing sex with her. now i like her but i don't want to marry her as we have different opinions about most of the things.
but i can't live without her and i can't resist my self in front of her.
i have proposed her for marriage also but she declined that also.
she asked that she is ready to be beated by her husband but she can't marry me.
what should i do now.
please help!!

2007-08-14 07:01:04 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

my b/f broke up wiht me bc he has alot of stuff right now and stress and work..he came over last night and we cried togther and we still love achother is this ok hat should i do to tell him we can make this work and go back out?

2007-08-14 07:00:44 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

would it be wrong for me to have the feeling of wanting to move out of state . I'm separated from my wife,we have two beautiful children which i see everyday, and have them everyother weekend. would it be wrong and selfish to do so, just for nice job

2007-08-14 07:00:08 · 27 answers · asked by viking_chef53 2 in Marriage & Divorce

Well, my dear wedding people...from time to time I get tired of answering questions...so Here is a question from Kat:

What was your worst wedding story? It could be your own wedding, a wedding where you were in the bridal party, or even just a guest at someone else's wedding.

I'm looking for "Bridezilla" stories, or horrible Mother or Father of the Bride or Groom stories...maybe bad vendors, or bad behavior from guests...

What was the worst wedding moment, or worst wedding you've ever been to...and why?

2007-08-14 06:57:22 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Weddings

i had my first love when i was 17. we were together for about 2 yrs. i'm happily with someone right now for about a yr and we have a baby together. I really love my bf with all my heart, no doubt about that but sometimes i think about and miss my ex. we broke up because i just felt like i didn't love him enough and because my family disaproved of him. we keep in touch once in a while because we stayed friends and when we talk we just seem to go back to "good old times". i get kinda sad when i don't hear from him in a while and i dont know if this is normal because he is my first love or if i still love him.

2007-08-14 06:57:12 · 1 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Family & Relationships

Ok... me and my boyfriend have a 3-month-old daughter... He's Christian and i'm catholic but I want to baptise my daughter and the other day he told me that he wasnt going when that happened and that his mom didn't want me to do that either

He had told me that christians do it when Iguess choose to follow that religion and it happens when theyre old enough to know about it . my family and his are totally different and we were raised differently

what should i do or tell him cos i do want my daughter baptised?

2007-08-14 06:55:16 · 26 answers · asked by geraldine_487 2 in Other - Family & Relationships

Today I was driving to work and I stopped at a red light. This guy pulled up next to my car in some sort of Cadillac sport car. He turned to look at me, then all of a sudden he put his hard top convertible down at the red light and he then put on his shades. I guess he just wanted to show off, but it was so cheesy and corny. He did it as if no one has ever seen a convertible top go down before. Why do guys try to impress girls with materialistic things, especially with their cars? I see this all the time.

2007-08-14 06:54:11 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

just wonderin coz a lie was spread by this chick that i was gay after i didnt wanna *** her and dudes who i was cool with before have started to ignore me straight after the rumour came out.

i know i wouldnt ignore someone if they were gay and i would understand if they avoided me if i was gay and had hit on them, but im straight and its just weird someone would completely avoid me on a rumour.

2007-08-14 06:54:05 · 1 answers · asked by Anonymous in Friends

I hear all the time about people ending up with the "wrong one" and then finding the "right one"... What would you do if you were in this position???

2007-08-14 06:53:07 · 16 answers · asked by Sunshine's Pic Is on 360 4 in Singles & Dating

What color hair and eyes will our baby have?

2007-08-14 06:52:15 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family

the computer online (a 13 year old) or a 7 year old (on the Wii) on a school day?????

2007-08-14 06:51:11 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family

this question is for men about women. also give reason for your answer. thanx

2007-08-14 06:49:18 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

Several times I caught him checking me out with a devilish grin on his face, and sometimes he would forget what he was saying when checking me out in class or out of class. I liked him so I smiled back. several classmates noticed him flirting with me. yes I was flattered by him so I smiled back. In his office it was so intimate; it felt as if we were the only two people in the world, and he felt it too, as he looked into my eyes and I looked into his. Then, I found out he has a wife, and I was crushed by this. I saw them out a few times and they always appeared mad with each other. If he has a wife why would he flirt with me? does he want to be with me?? Or is he just looking to sleep with me? he even jokingly called me his wife.

2007-08-14 06:49:09 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Marriage & Divorce

i've been in love with a girl i met at the age of 11, loved her ever since, but when we tried to go out i ruined everything, i just couldn't loose fear of being rejected, and now 5 years later i'm trying to make everything the least painful, but she's going out with someone, what should i do to win her back?

(i'm desperate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

2007-08-14 06:48:28 · 1 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

2007-08-14 06:48:25 · 2 answers · asked by MJ 6 in Singles & Dating

Ok just to tell everyone im a gurl and im using my boyfriends yahoo answers thing ok....ok well im christian and my boyfriend is catholic and we are getting married. We are gettin married in chicago IL and we are looking for a church where they allow us to get married without changing religion...anyone know a place in chicago? Help help help ive been looking for a couple of months and no luck :[

2007-08-14 06:45:24 · 30 answers · asked by Michael L 2 in Weddings