Jokes & Riddles - March 2007

First man said to the other," You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven't even met once. We call this arranged marriage.
I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love...I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems."
The other said, "Talking about love marriages...I'll tell you my story.I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years.
"After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law.
My daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother.
More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he's my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son.now my father's son i.e. my brother is my grandson.
Ultimately, I have become my own grand grand father and I am my own grandson.
And you say you have family problems.... Give me a break!!"

2007-03-28 18:10:17 · 9 answers · asked by medi 2

2007-03-28 18:04:12 · 6 answers · asked by n8.heinz 1

3 MEN GO INTO A MOTEL. THE MAN BEHIND THE DESK SAID THE ROOM IS $30, SO
EACH MAN PAID $10 AND WENT TO THE ROOM.
A WHILE LATER THE MAN BEHIND THE DESK REALIZED THE ROOM WAS ONLY $25, SO
HE SENT THE BELLBOY TO THE 3 GUYS' ROOM WITH $5.
ON THE WAY, THE BELLBOY COULDN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO SPLIT $5 EVENLY
BETWEEN 3 MEN, SO HE GAVE EACH MAN A $1 AND KEPT THE OTHER $2 FOR
HIMSELF.
THIS MEANT THAT THE 3 MEN EACH PAID $9 FOR THE ROOM, WHICH IS A TOTAL OF
$27, ADD THE $2 THAT THE BELLBOY KEPT = $29.
WHERE IS THE OTHER DOLLAR?

2007-03-28 17:56:42 · 11 answers · asked by MicHeLLe 2

It pays if you don't come back.

2007-03-28 17:52:27 · 1 answers · asked by SafetyDancer 5

2007-03-28 17:47:30 · 12 answers · asked by * r 2

leave
plateau
remember
day
too

2007-03-28 17:46:17 · 9 answers · asked by The Crazy B!tch 5

2007-03-28 17:38:39 · 16 answers · asked by * r 2

Dark as night
But for the cows
Brings haste if not speed
and clarity to the dephisit
some by the cane
some by the brand

2007-03-28 17:11:38 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-03-28 17:09:48 · 8 answers · asked by share the love!!! 2

and u were all alone

2007-03-28 17:08:16 · 4 answers · asked by Ct. AK 1

I range in lots of colors, have lots of room to grow....
I can be short, tall, big or small but you don't have to water me daily....what am I?

2007-03-28 16:59:47 · 17 answers · asked by Chrissy 2

What are some funny pranks/jokes that me and my friend can do during a softball tournement? like something we can do together like paint black eyes on ourselves or something.

2007-03-28 16:59:27 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-03-28 16:58:58 · 9 answers · asked by Smooch The Pooch 7

Just wondering-I was dating this nurse and she said every time she got a prick in her hand she put it in cider.

2007-03-28 16:49:40 · 11 answers · asked by NuncProTunc 3

2007-03-28 16:48:02 · 8 answers · asked by Smooch The Pooch 7

A certain large animal lives happily and thrives here on Earth. One day, every single one of these critters is wiped out by a mysterious disease which affects only this particular animal. There are none left anywhere on earth -- they are all gone. About a year or so later, they begin to reappear on Earth again. How can this be?
(Copyright 2006 Riddles.com)

2007-03-28 16:44:53 · 11 answers · asked by Chrissy 2

2007-03-28 16:40:05 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

2007-03-28 16:39:05 · 16 answers · asked by TE 5

help me up i wanna lafe

2007-03-28 16:37:40 · 6 answers · asked by tawfeeq a 1

I just talked to a weatherman.

He said he is right with his statistics 87% of the time and he is wrong 24% of the time.

2007-03-28 16:34:58 · 24 answers · asked by Ace 5

A blonde is on a four-engine plane crossing the Atlantic. All of a sudden there's a loud bang. The pilot announces over the intercom “I'm sorry, one of our engines has just shut off. We'll be delayed 45 minutes.”
Suddenly there's another bang. Once again, the intercom clicks on and the pilot expresses his regret that they'll be delayed two hours.
Shortly thereafter, there is another bang and the pilot announces that they'll be delayed 3 hours. The blonde turns to the guy sitting beside her and says, “Man, if the fourth engine shuts off we'll be up here all day.”

2007-03-28 16:34:16 · 6 answers · asked by Chrissy 2

please make the jokes understandable! thanx!

2007-03-28 16:33:23 · 6 answers · asked by Tiful K. 2

Women's Rights

2007-03-28 16:19:46 · 16 answers · asked by Sean Durkman 2

a riddle for you if who is the first person who answer a right answer he/she will have 10 points:)


the object has 4 feet it can't walk but it can run???what is it??

2007-03-28 16:06:31 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

ok so, I had this black mech. pencil, and somone borrowed it, she says she put it back in my bag, but its not there. and I just forgot about it and I never even saw her using it after. and then on tuesday, in science, somone asks for a pencil during a test- now I always want to be nice because I hate it when I dont have a pencil in class. so I give one, and its my FAVORITE, its orange(fav color), has this gel thing, lots of led in it, never used eraser, and I just got it a few days ago, and he uses it and just walks out, and never gave it back, and i really want it back, and I have science tomorrow, and if he says he "lost" it and junk, what should I doo? and yeah, Thsi does sound retarded, but Im tired of people not giving back MY stuff

2007-03-28 16:01:31 · 10 answers · asked by Dalia 1

2007-03-28 16:00:01 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous

a man was walking to a garden and ask the gardener:
man: why aren't you watering the plant's?
gardener: sir, i think it's raining and i don't think i have to water it
man: that's not an excuse,!.....then use an umbrella




......does that make sense?

2007-03-28 15:47:06 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

I was at the airport one day with George Bush, and everything was going great. But there was this guy standing in the corner. Bush walks over to me and says; "is that guy moses" so i told him i dunno why dont you go ask him. So Bush walks over to the man and says, "Hi im George Bush are you Moses? The guy just ignores him. So Bush walked back over to me and says i dunno whats wrong he wouldnt speak to me. So i told him to ask again. So he went over to the man and said; "hi are you moses? The guy just ignored him again. So Bush walks back over to me and says. Well im stumped he still wont talk to me. So i decided to walk over to him and ask Are you Moses? He tell s me "Yes I am", and so then i ask him well why didnt you talk to Bush. Then he looks me straight in the eye and said. The last time i talked to a Bush, I ended up stuck in the desert for 40 years.....

2007-03-28 15:37:50 · 14 answers · asked by swascndy21 2

The World's Hardest Riddle
Body: I turn polar bears white
and I will make you cry.
I make guys have to pee
and girls comb their hair.
I make celebrities look stupid
and normal people look like celebrities.
I turn pancakes brown
and make your champane bubble.
If you sqeeze me, I'll pop.
If you look at me, you'll pop.
Can you guess the riddle?


97% of Harvard graduates can not figure this riddle out, but 84% of kindergarten students were able to figure this out in 6 minutes or less. Can you guess the riddle?

2007-03-28 15:37:05 · 4 answers · asked by moe 1

they all want the chest of davy jones
and they all want elizabeths chest (her chest area)

2007-03-28 15:27:23 · 5 answers · asked by Mrs.Depp 1