What is the funniest long joke you have ever heard?

Question

please make the jokes understandable! thanx!

Answer 1

One day a lady walks into a pet store to buy her boyfriend a birthday present. She tells the owner, "I want to get my boyfriend a pet, but I only have $20. What do you have for that?"
The owner says, "Hmm. I only have pedigree animals here, but I think I have something in back," and he goes back and comes out with a bullfrog. He says, "This is no ordinary bullfrog, this bullfrog gives blowjobs."

Thinking the frog could save her a little work around the house, the lady said, "I'll take it."

She takes it home and gives it to her boyfriend, who is less than thrilled. She smiles and says, "This is no ordinary bullfrog - I'm going to leave you two alone and let you get to know each other."

About 45 minutes later, the lady hears pots and pans banging around in the kitchen, she runs in and yells, "What the hell is going on around here!?"

The man looks up from a cookbook and says, "If I can teach this frog how to cook you're outta here."

Answer 2

The funniest shaggy dog story I've heard is obviously lengthy, however I'll take a look at my great to deliver you a brief one. What Do Michael Jackson and Xbox 360 have in typical? Kids flip them on and they are product of white plastic.

Answer 3

*A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him?"

This has a bit to do with religion but I thought it was funny!

Answer 4

this isn't the funniest but funny

one day a boy walks in to school with no shoes or socks on
the teacher asks him where are your shoes and socks
the boy said i was on top of Blueberry Hill
The next day he comes to school with no shirt on
the teacher asks him why he doesn't have any shirt, socks or shoes on? he says i was on top of Blueberry Hill
And so on and so on until he gets to his boxers
THen the teacher screams to him U HAVE TO COME TO SCHOol WITH CLOTHES ON!
the next day he still is in his boxers, saying he was on top of Bluberry Hill
THen the teacher says they have a new student
the teacher says please introduce yourself
she says my name is Bluberry Hill




Please pick me for best answer

Answer 5

Aaaaa dog and a cat and a dog and a cat and a dog and a cat go meow!

Answer 6

leanna that was funny!