Jokes & Riddles - July 2006

A bathtub is filled with water. You are given the choice of a teaspoon, a teacup, or a bucket. Which would you use to empty the bathtub?

2006-07-19 11:41:39 · 13 answers · asked by heatherlynnmorrow 5

example: yo mamma, redneck, sexual, humerous deosn't matter what kind best one gets 10 points...

2006-07-19 11:38:49 · 9 answers · asked by bubblesgalore222 1

2006-07-19 11:26:51 · 6 answers · asked by ShopGirl 2

2006-07-19 11:13:38 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

Fill in the blank. Part II. If you get blamed for using obscenity then..

Don't blame me. muahahahahaha

H to the iZzo

2006-07-19 11:08:33 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

When his wife gave birth to triplets, her husband went looking for the other two blokes.

2006-07-19 11:05:22 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

A Mother-in-law decides to see if her three son-in-law's love her or at least appreciate her...

The next day while strolling along the river with her first son-in-law, she lets herself fall into the water and starts to drown.

Without hesitation, the son-in-law jumps in the river and saves his mother-in-law.

The next day, in front of his house, he finds a new car, a City Honda, with a little note on the windshield: Thank-you on behalf of your mother-in-law.

She undertakes the same scenario with her second eldest son-in-law. This one too, dives into the river and saves his mother-in-law. The next day, he too, in front of his house, finds a new car: the same City Honda with a little note on the windshield: Thank-you on behalf of your mother-in-law.

The same scenario occurs with the third son-in-law, she falls in the water and starts to drown. He watches his mother-in-law drown while thinking to himself: I've been waiting a long time for this!

The next day, in front of his house, he sees a brand new Mercedez with a little note on the windshield: Thank-you on behalf of your father-in-law.

2006-07-19 11:02:04 · 11 answers · asked by neha 3

"Doctor, I keep thinking I'm a pair of curtains"
"Go home and pull yourself together"!

"Doctor, I broke my legs in 3 places"
"Well you shouldn't have gone to those places"

Anymore you can think of?

2006-07-19 10:54:42 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-19 10:54:27 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

"honey, i'm home"

2006-07-19 10:53:14 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-19 10:43:25 · 7 answers · asked by Tracy M 2

An old couple are in church, during service the old lady whispers to her husband "I just did a silent fart, what should I do?" he says "Get a new battery for your f***king hearing aid".

2006-07-19 10:39:03 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-19 10:23:32 · 14 answers · asked by friend4u 1

2006-07-19 10:13:30 · 14 answers · asked by emilybam 2

Part 1 Answer: The number of elephants on earth would decrease by one elephant...(I SAID it was pathetic so don't come back at me >:-)
Now let's see if you can solve part 2...

2006-07-19 10:11:56 · 5 answers · asked by Diablous 4

ok, here it is : plain & simple.1st to guess the answer to the joke that is most likely my answer gets the 10 pts. Oh, WAIT A MINUTE! Any added innuendo will be considered,just so everyone has a shot after 7 answers that's only fair. So my answer and creative get the pts actually. Hope ya all read all of this. here's da joke:
Things Men Shouldn't Say in a Victoria's Secret Store

1. No Thanks. ... Just Sniffing.

2. I'll be in the dressing room going blind.

3. Oh the size won't matter. She's inflatable.

4. No need to wrap it up. I'll eat it here.

5. Will you model this for me???

6. Oh, honey, I'll never fit into that.

7. $50?? Are you kidding? She's just gonna end up NAKED anyway!

2006-07-19 10:08:43 · 7 answers · asked by frith25 4

any sites with really funny jokes,pictures,videos or pranks?I've checked Ebaums world,liquid generation, and funny junk.com already.My friend's bored at work,I want to send her something.

2006-07-19 10:07:30 · 6 answers · asked by L.T. 4

1st joke:One Ugly Wish
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief they have experienced; He decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise.

They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.

The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too."

Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted. This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing. Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be.

The guy calms down and says: "Make 'em all ugly again."

Idk..but I thought it was hilarious.

2006-07-19 10:05:58 · 32 answers · asked by lonnie 3

2006-07-19 10:04:27 · 4 answers · asked by LoVeLy 3

a blonde and a brunette were copyin off of chickens one day and the brunette say cockadoodle doo and the blonde said cock'll do!! i thought it was funny!

2006-07-19 10:00:22 · 6 answers · asked by Cherry 2

I bet ALL of you won't be able to guess ANY of my 3 part pathetic riddle...
or will you >:-)

2006-07-19 09:53:12 · 5 answers · asked by Diablous 4

2006-07-19 09:51:05 · 19 answers · asked by dishwasher67 6

im mexican and dont take this the wrong way / There is a Mexican and a black person in a car who is driving?

2006-07-19 09:45:02 · 19 answers · asked by Rocky23 (Barça: Més que un club) 4

silence is golden but duct tape is silver. what does that mean?

2006-07-19 09:42:34 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-19 09:40:34 · 19 answers · asked by dishwasher67 6

2006-07-19 09:37:40 · 16 answers · asked by HeartsBreaker 2

They both wiggle when you eat it!

2006-07-19 09:35:57 · 21 answers · asked by bicheeeened30 6

Or kick a cold in the crotch and spit on a fever? What do you think?

2006-07-19 09:14:47 · 8 answers · asked by kitten lover3 7

I have real issues when deciding ....

When is a wood a forest?
when is a pond a lake?
when is a boat a ship?

Help!

2006-07-19 09:11:27 · 11 answers · asked by Mac 2

what?

2006-07-19 09:11:21 · 21 answers · asked by kitten lover3 7