2006-07-19 10:43:25 · 7 answers · asked by Tracy M 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
A woman goes into the welfare office to fill out the requred forms. The lady helping her asked for the name of her oldest male child. "Billy" she replied. "now the oldest girl" "Billie" was the reply "OK, and the next oldest?" the lady asked. "Billee" she replied again. this went on for all 16 of her kids!
I do have one question for you said the Lady. "How do they know who you want if you yell for them?
"Thats easy" came the reply..."I just use their LAST name"!
2006-07-19 11:03:31 · answer #1 · answered by nooodle_ninja 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You might be a redneck, if your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs. ...Or if your momma takes a can of beer to a job interview...or if your mommas hairdo gets caught in the ceiling fan, or if your brother is dating your sister or if the grass is so tall in your front yard you can't see any of the junked cars or they won't let your family swim in the public park because they will leave too big a ring.
2006-07-19 17:54:03 · answer #2 · answered by loufedalis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is my favorite
On the Way to Prison
Three convicts were on the way to prison. They were each allowed to take one item with them to help them occupy their time while incarcerated.
On the bus, one turned to another and said, "So, what did you bring?"
The second convict pulled out a box of paints and stated that he intended to paint anything he could. He wanted to become the "Grandma Moses of Jail."
Then he asked the first, "What did you bring?"
The first convict pulled out a deck of cards and grinned and said, "I brought cards. I can play poker, solitaire, gin, and any number of games."
The third convict was sitting quietly aside, grinning to himself. The other two took notice and asked, "Why are you so smug? What did you bring?"
The guy pulled out a box of tampons and smiled. He said, "I brought these."
The other two were puzzled and asked, "What can you do with those?"
He grinned and pointed to the box and said, "Well according to the box, I can go horseback riding, swimming, roller-skating...."
2006-07-19 18:53:56 · answer #3 · answered by itsbrightout. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whats the last thing you usually hear before a Redneck dies......"hey y'all....watch this"
OR
How do you castrate a Redneck?
Kick his sister in the jaw.
2006-07-19 17:49:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fire In The Furnace?
A seventy-five year old White guy, his hair is completely white, marries a twenty-two year old girl, and she gets pregnant.
Nine months later, he walks into the Maternity Ward. He says to the nurse, "Well, how'd I do?"
The nurse says, "She had twins."
He says, "Heh, heh, heh...well, I guess that goes to show, that even if there's snow on the roof, there can still be fire in the furnace."
She says, "Well, then you'd better change filters. Both of the babies are black."
2006-07-20 02:25:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might be a redneck if you think watching professional wrestling is foreplay.
2006-07-19 17:53:31 · answer #6 · answered by Brian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you might be a redneck is you stare at the orange juice bottle becuase it says 'concentrate'
2006-07-19 17:46:49 · answer #7 · answered by ILoveMySailor 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋