Jokes & Riddles - July 2006

1. How do you answer this question?
a. True
b. False

2.Which of the following is an example of an example?
a. The mission
b.
c. All of the answers are not true
d. below above

3. If the clock strikes 3 and it’s 9 O’clock, what time is it?
a. Alarm
b. Doorbell
c. Cause and Effect
d. Permission

4. How many people does it take?
a. 7 people
b. 7 lightbulbs
c. 7 O’clock
d. 7-11

5. A tree falls down in the middle of a forest. Did the tree fall down if nobody was there to see it?
a. It will
b. It won’t make noise
c. It will not
d. It cannot make noise

6. Who or what is why and how, when and if it happens?
a. The Minister
b. where
c. Nobody knows
d. Sometimes

7. Which of the following does NOT make sense?
a. one dollar
b. perfume
c. nickel
d. sight

2006-07-28 14:55:01 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous

I once witnessed a hot dog eating competition where an Asian guy ate 65 hotdogs in 3 minutes. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris ate 3 Asian guys in 65 seconds.

2006-07-28 14:34:48 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

I work for a construction company and I swear I could write a book on this most of the jokes in out houses are toward Mexicans but funny

2006-07-28 14:32:43 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-28 14:28:37 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

I have had a rough day, can you make me laugh?


Peach

2006-07-28 14:27:39 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

WHAT DO YOU CALL THREE BLONDES STANDING ON THIER HEADS? TWO BRUNETTES AND A RED HEAD WITH BAD BREATH

2006-07-28 14:22:17 · 12 answers · asked by paige_squirrel_goddess 2

Ever wonder what movies will debut in the year 2007? Well somewhere on the internet has a list of alphabetical movies that will debut in 2007....Find 1 for each letter....except Q, X and Z so at the end you should have 23 movies listed in alphabetical order.....

2006-07-28 14:17:14 · 8 answers · asked by MzChamillinator 5

2006-07-28 14:13:53 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

I need to know if anyone has ever called 411 for info and when they answer and ask name of town you say Pakistan and when they ask for name you say Bin Laden

2006-07-28 14:08:37 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

0:55 hours left babyyyyyyyy

2006-07-28 14:06:48 · 5 answers · asked by I tell it like it is 1

can you stump me?

2006-07-28 13:57:49 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

Clean or dirty !!!!

2006-07-28 13:51:45 · 14 answers · asked by ChiefNickNameadvancer 3

My apartment is feuding/pranking with a guys apartment and we need good ideas for clean, harmless practical jokes that won't get us kicked out of the dorms. So far,
We covered their cars, inside and out, with clothespins.
They stole one shoe from each of our pairs (and delivered them the next night in a heap)
We set their alarm clocks for three in the morning and hidden them.
And they just stole all our pillows.
The only thing we can think of, is to steal their pillows. But that would be lame, eh?

2006-07-28 13:41:39 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

Ok, here it is, first correct posted answer will be chosen as best answer. GoodLuck

You walk through a door, in front of you is a room in the shape of half a circle. There are two seats facing away from you, both seats are occupied by dead bodies. Instantly, you know that you are about to die as well. So, where are you.

Best of luck!!!

2006-07-28 13:31:41 · 38 answers · asked by Tweendasheetz 3

First one right gets 10 pts

2006-07-28 13:26:28 · 27 answers · asked by Anna 3

Please make it funny.

2006-07-28 13:22:51 · 17 answers · asked by Anna 3

If someone told you that half the earth was going to blow up tomorrow, which side would you transport to?

2006-07-28 13:22:35 · 14 answers · asked by Why Not 3

2006-07-28 13:21:30 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

Last week I was having the most excrutiating pain
so I went to the doctor
I dropped my shorts to show him the problem
there on the end of my penis was a huge hairy mole
the doctor was amazed as he had never seen anything like it before
he was so careful to remove the mole without causing me pain and distress
The doctor said he hopes he never sees such a sight again
I assured him that I will never shag another one

2006-07-28 12:52:02 · 21 answers · asked by benji 3

2006-07-28 12:16:08 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

I HAVE A _____________.


be nice and not perverted.

2006-07-28 12:09:47 · 29 answers · asked by nikki -nicole 3

Answer: I don't know and I don't f*****g care

2006-07-28 11:44:31 · 19 answers · asked by bobo 2

It's hot here and traffics backed up and I just cannot find anything funny right now, so please make me laugh. Thanks

2006-07-28 11:34:04 · 14 answers · asked by -Tequila17 6

Ok, some other guy asked what was the answer to this riddle, but never said it, so if someone knows the answer that someone will get the 10 pts. Please answer it, I am dying to know:

10 points for best or right answer!!
Ok. There is a guy in a car in the middle of an empty field. He was reading his book when he suddenly was murdered. All the windows were rolled up and bulletproof, the doors were locked and indistructable. He was COMPLETELY alone, he didn't suffacate, its not suicide, and there are no planes or bombs involved!!. How did he get murdered?

Thanks

2006-07-28 11:21:15 · 26 answers · asked by Dan 5

1.)Is it used for some careers? Yes,
2.)Is it used for homework? Sometimes
3.)Is it very samll? No
4.)Does have buttons? Yes
5.)Can it take you to a new world? Yes
6.)Is it uncomplex? No
7.)Is it cheap? No
8.)Do you have one? Most likely
9.)Does it come in more than one styles? Yes

What am I?
First correct answer gets the points

2006-07-28 11:19:26 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

Prince Charles found a genie trapped in a bottle and let him out. The Genie thanked him and as Charles has got most things, granted him one wish.
Mmnn? Well, mother's favourite corgi died six months ago, I would dearly love to have you bring it back to life.
The Genie said, Sic months ago? The thing is all rotted and just bones by now, have another wish. Something for yourself.
Er well, I would like Camilla to be the fairest lady in the kingdom.
The Genie thought for a moment and said-
Let's have look at that corgi.

2006-07-28 11:13:56 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

i think its so funny lol

It is a known fact that all daughters-in-law have problems with their mother-in-law.

Anyway... One day the daughters-in-law all got together and decided to apologise to their mothers-in-law for everything they had supposedly done wrong.

A week later the daughters-in-law decided to take their families (including their mothers-in-law) on a picnic.

The mothers-in-law were all in one bus, which was the first to leave.

On the way their bus had an accident and all the mothers-on-law died.

The daughters-in-law were devastated but one in particular was more heart broken than the rest.

Everyone tried to console her by telling her that at least her mother-in-law had died without any tension between them. But still she cried.

Eventually when she was calm enough to speak the other women asked her, "Why are you crying so much? Was your mother-in-law that special?"

The woman no sobbing uncontrollably replied... "No, she missed the bus!"

2006-07-28 10:58:01 · 27 answers · asked by neha 3

CAN U FIGURE OUT THE RIDDLE???
when asked this riddle, 80% of kindergarten kids got the answer,
compared to 17% of Stanford University seniors.


What is greater than God,
More evil than the devil,
The poor have it,
The rich need it,
And if you eat it, you'll die

2006-07-28 10:55:32 · 23 answers · asked by George S 2

Doc, I'm farting like Hell but the odd thing is it doesn't smell.
The doctor grabs a scapel.
You gonna operate on my ****?
No, on your nose.

2006-07-28 10:55:07 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous

The milk man, the paper boy, and evening T.V??

2006-07-28 10:53:00 · 7 answers · asked by DesertGirlie 2