Jokes & Riddles - July 2006

Who am I?

2006-07-28 21:51:45 · 14 answers · asked by LiN 6

There were these two elderly people living in a Florida mobile home park. He was a widower and she a widow. They had known one another for a number of years.

Now, one evening there was a community supper in the big activity center. These two were at the same table, across from one another. As the meal went on, he made a few admiring glances at her and finally gathered up his courage to ask her, "Will you marry me?" After about six seconds of 'careful consideration,' she answered. "Yes. Yes, I will."

The meal ended and with a few more pleasant exchanges, they went to their respective places. Next morning, he was troubled. "Did she say 'yes' or did she say 'no'?" He couldn't remember. Try as he would, he just could not recall. No even a faint memory. With trepidation, he went to the telephone and called her. First, he explained to her that he didn't remember as well as he used to. Then he reviewed the lovely evening past. As he gained a little more courage, he then inquired of her, "When I asked if you would marry me, did you say 'Yes' or did you say 'No'?"

He was delighted to hear her say, "Why, I said, 'Yes, yes I will' and I meant it with all my heart." Then she continued, "And I am so glad that you called, because I couldn't remember who had asked me."

2006-07-28 21:46:06 · 15 answers · asked by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7

2006-07-28 21:34:55 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-28 21:27:08 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

Three friends went to a hotel. The bill was Rs 75/-
Each one contributed Rs.25/-.
The waiter took the bill to the cashier.
The cashier was happy & decided to give them a discount of Rs.5/- & asked the waiter to return them Rs.5/-.
Now the waiter was confused. How to distribute Rs 5 among 3 persons?
He kept Rs 2 in his pocket & gave one rupee to each one of the 3 persons.
So initially each one had contributed Rs.25. Now as they are given 1 rupee back, their contribution reduces to Rs 24.
They all contributed Rs 24 -- that is 24x3=72 & 2 rupees are in the waiters pocket.
The total becomes 74. But they had paid Rs 75.
Where is the remaining 1 rupee?.

2006-07-28 21:18:47 · 10 answers · asked by shri 1

my5 year old grandson asked me WHERE DOES POOH COME FROM not being very good at answering these type of question i said WELL YOU KNOW YOU HAVE JUST HAD DINNER THE FOOD GOES IN YOUR BELLY AND YOUR BELLY SORTS IT OUT.IT KEEPS THE GOOD BITS OF THE FOOD AND THROWS OUT THE BAD BITS AND THEY COME OUT OF YOUR BUM INTO THE TOILET.he looked at me puzzled and then said WELL WHAT ABOUT TIGGER.

2006-07-28 21:15:19 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

this one his hard i'm looking for a word!!!!!

2006-07-28 21:13:19 · 13 answers · asked by cubuo1o 1

what walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and three in the evening??

2006-07-28 21:09:41 · 11 answers · asked by Mark F 2

First I would like to say that I already solved this so... have fun and good luck

When Bree was thrice as old as Devin,
His sister Mate was twenty-seven.
When Devin was half as old as Mate,
Then brother Bree was thirty-eight.
Their ages add to one forty three.
How old are Devin, Mate and Bree?

♥

2006-07-28 21:07:56 · 14 answers · asked by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7

2006-07-28 21:06:39 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-28 21:04:35 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-07-28 21:01:12 · 21 answers · asked by omegapainkiller 1

2006-07-28 20:58:41 · 8 answers · asked by ravi_tarun_2006 1

2006-07-28 20:56:06 · 8 answers · asked by JodiBaby 3

This is probably my last entry for awhile, for tonight’s my last night. We’ve had some pretty hard times for quite awhile and several family tragedies. No point in going into it because Everyone has problems, and so many are MUCH Worse than mine. I Know this is a passing thing, just part of life, and Things Will Look Up… but it has been a Very ugly day.

I just feel a little frightened and alone tonight. I could REALLY use a touch of humor right now, and perhaps a couple of prayers couldn't hurt either. Thank you to all who have been so wonderful here. I really love the people and this site! I'm going to miss you and hope to return soon after I relocate. God Bless You All And Thank You For All Your Help And Humor!

2006-07-28 20:55:40 · 13 answers · asked by EUDORA 2

2006-07-28 20:50:38 · 20 answers · asked by omegapainkiller 1

2006-07-28 20:49:17 · 6 answers · asked by JodiBaby 3

2006-07-28 20:47:28 · 13 answers · asked by POWER-FULL 2

2006-07-28 20:43:32 · 10 answers · asked by JodiBaby 3

Two trains travel toward each other on the same track, beginning 100 miles apart. One train travels at 40 miles per hour; the other travels at 60 miles an hour. A bird starts flight at the same location as the faster train, flying at a speed of 90 miles per hour. When it reaches the slower train, it turns around, flying the other direction at the same speed. When it reaches the faster train again, it turns around -- and so on. When the trains collide, how far will the bird have flown?

2006-07-28 20:34:38 · 5 answers · asked by brian c 1

makes me wanna do some to you?

Step away from the candy and get ya hands above ya head...

2006-07-28 20:28:39 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

Two girls have the same parents and were born at the same hour of the same day of the same month, but they are not twins. How can this be possible?

2006-07-28 20:06:18 · 8 answers · asked by brian c 1

2006-07-28 20:04:57 · 10 answers · asked by L.T. 4

Two blonde guys were working for the city works department. One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind him and fill the hole. They worked up one side of the street, then down the other, then moved on to the next street, working furiously all day without rest, one guy digging a hole, the other guy filling it in again. An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing. So he asked the hole digger, "I'm impressed by the effort you two are putting into your work, but I don't get it why do you dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?" The hole digger wiped his brow and sighed, "Well, I suppose it probably looks odd because we're normally a three-man team. But today the guy who plants the trees called in sick."

2006-07-28 20:03:05 · 15 answers · asked by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7

Bob took his Saint Bernard to the vet.

"Doctor," he said sadly, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to cut off my dog's tail."

The vet stepped back, "Bob, why should I do such a terrible thing?"

"Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome."

♥

2006-07-28 19:52:55 · 19 answers · asked by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7

"If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up" said the sarcastic lecturer.

After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. "Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" enquired the lecturer with a sneer.

"Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."

2006-07-28 19:51:17 · 11 answers · asked by brian c 1

we think that's rude.

2006-07-28 19:44:33 · 9 answers · asked by L.T. 4

Do you know? for fun? for a girl chicken? idk?

2006-07-28 19:42:32 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous

Clue Everlasting

2006-07-28 19:35:48 · 10 answers · asked by cubuo1o 1

A man walks into a psychiatrist office wearing nothing but shrink wrap. The doctor tells the man, "I can clearly see your nuts"

2006-07-28 19:32:56 · 7 answers · asked by conorlarkin 2