Jokes & Riddles - December 2006

What does a rabbit carry on it's back while it flyes

2006-12-09 12:05:44 · 9 answers · asked by kiki 2

last ditch effort for anyone willing to give up a clue or answer

2006-12-09 12:04:49 · 7 answers · asked by Elthumper 1

you are trapped in a room with no windows, doors, or any other opening.all that is there is a table and a mirror. u may not use the pieces of the mirror to dig a hole out. how do u escape?(not impossible)

2006-12-09 11:57:50 · 15 answers · asked by nairfire625 1

2006-12-09 11:56:23 · 20 answers · asked by jcutiealwayz_11 1

Why do shower curtains fall in love with you when you are wet? They stick like s**t to a blanket, but dont want to know you when you are dry !!!!!!

2006-12-09 11:56:17 · 8 answers · asked by Shredder 6

2006-12-09 11:56:13 · 5 answers · asked by Inxlovex123 2

2006-12-09 11:54:27 · 13 answers · asked by jcutiealwayz_11 1

1.KEY
2.SNOWMAN
3.BOOK
4.NECKLACE
5.DAUGHTER
6.CAR
7.CHRISTMAS
8.DAD
9.PRESENTS
10.BOW

2006-12-09 11:47:21 · 26 answers · asked by coolawesomebrainpower 2

born in whorehouses.

brothel sprouts..

whats the difference between your paycheck and your c.o.c.k

you dont have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck..

2006-12-09 11:34:50 · 17 answers · asked by chris w. 7

couple were discussing the rules they were going to have in their marriage. The man throws his pants to his new wife and says try them on. She has a go and says they dont fit, he says that's right so now you know who wears the pants in this marriage. She gives him her knickers and says put them on, he looks at them and says I cant get into those. No she says, and you never will with an attitude like that !!!!!!!!!!!

2006-12-09 11:20:56 · 20 answers · asked by Shredder 6

Once in a second.
Once in minute.
Twice in a millennium.
But never in a life time?

2006-12-09 11:18:47 · 24 answers · asked by amygerrero 2

2006-12-09 11:16:48 · 13 answers · asked by harrypotterschick07 2

When you look at each word on the list, take no more than 5 seconds, and write down the first thing that comes to mind.
1. red
2. banana
3. tree
4. scarf
5. cold
6. brave
7. tools
8. facial
9. correct
10. stars

2006-12-09 11:16:10 · 22 answers · asked by honeysuckle 3

6 M_____ W______ on a C_____ B____
and
8 V____ OF X IN S_______
Mean Ive been trying these for days and no luck

2006-12-09 11:15:51 · 10 answers · asked by techno 3

Suppose you were merely walking along minding your own business when along your path to one side you saw a hoard of cute little bunny rabbits. These bunny rabbits in a vicious manner, commenced attacking you verbally for no reason you know of. What would you do?

2006-12-09 11:11:03 · 14 answers · asked by Mick 3

three fishermen were talking and one say's"did I tell you about the time I caught a 500 pound tuna" and the second one says "you think that's good, I once caught three large marlins in a single day" What did the third one catch?

2006-12-09 10:59:20 · 10 answers · asked by Book of Changes 3

There was a man who had had a headache for twenty years and was at the point where he wanted to end his own life, but he decided to go to a specialist first.

No doctor could solve his problem, until finally one of them said "You have a very rare problem, your testicles are pressed up against your spine causing your headache. The only way to remedy it is to remove your testicles."

The man hesitantly agrees and gets them removed.

On his way home he walks past a taylor shop with a sign saying "ALL SUITS HALF PRICE"

Being in need of a new suit he walks in where a man greets him and says "Hello Sir I see you want a suit, I would say that you are a 34 sleeve and a 24 pant."

"Wow! How did you know that?" said the man.

"Why Sir I've been in this business for 40 years. Would you like shoes to go with that?"

"Sure" says the man. "Okay I'd say that you're a size 10 wide."

"Ok, now you're freaking me out...Thats a great talent" says the man.

"Thanks" replied the

2006-12-09 10:58:11 · 3 answers · asked by Mike P 1

A guy walks into the local welfare office for his monthly check.
He marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi. You know, I just HATE coming in here drawing welfare month after month. I'd really much rather have a job.
The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent.
We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur-bodyguard for his nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes.
Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You'll have a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting salary is $200,000 a year."

The guy says, "You're bullshitting me!"

The social worker says, "Yeah, well, you started it."

2006-12-09 10:50:23 · 20 answers · asked by a m 4

4 animals....


a mink on my back, a tiger in my bed, a jaguar in my garage and an a.ss to pay for it all.

2006-12-09 10:50:12 · 25 answers · asked by chris w. 7

I got this from Drake and Josh... Say to someone: Say fort. (and they obey to all of these) Say it again. And again. Now spell it. Spell it again. Say it again Say it three times. And once more. What do you eat soup with? They'll say Fork and give you a look of pure "Haha, you thought you could outsmart me?!" Then wait till the penny drops. The look on my bfs face was priceless!! If they don't get it say to them "Really? *I* eat soup with a spoon"

2006-12-09 10:47:29 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-12-09 10:45:24 · 15 answers · asked by Book of Changes 3

ok, so i saw this thing on fanfiction,and it said, hi my name is Jo, and i work in a Potter factory, i have a husband and a family, one day, my boss came up to me and said, "hey Jo, you busy?" and I said, what do you think dipshit! I write the #$%!@ Harry Potter books!

Tell me what you think, by the way it was a disclaimer before a story....

2006-12-09 10:40:29 · 26 answers · asked by harrypotterschick07 2

2006-12-09 10:37:21 · 19 answers · asked by Danielle 1

and asked for some viagra, " ive heard this viagra is good" he said "Can you get it over the counter"
"only if i take 6" the chemist said.

2006-12-09 10:32:11 · 15 answers · asked by chris w. 7

from the 60's maybe

2006-12-09 10:31:17 · 3 answers · asked by Book of Changes 3

one day the husband comes home and finds his wife complaining about everything.
she points him to the light in the hall and asks him to fix it, he replies "what do I look like to you a con edison" worker?
then she goes to the refrigirator and asks him to fix the door, he says what am I a G&E operator?"
He gets upset and leaves the house to go get beer in a bar. when he comes home, he sees that the light is fine and the refrigerator door opens fine, so he goes to his wife and asks "what happened? everything works" and she says, "well when you left i sat on the porch crying and this nice gentleman approached me and asked me what was wrong, i told him and he said that he'll fix everything but i either gotta bake a cake for him or have sex with him"
then the husband asks " so what kinda cake did you bake him?" she says "do I look like betty crocker?"

2006-12-09 10:27:03 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

describe the type of bottle or can whatever it would be in.....my dad got me the wrong thing and said he thought that what he brought me was cheese whiz

2006-12-09 10:26:43 · 4 answers · asked by jules 2

This joke was so random it made me laugh..

A guy goes to a supermarket and notices a beautiful blonde wave at him saying hello. He's rather taken back, because he can't place where he knows her from, so he says "Do you know me?" to which she eplies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."

Now he thinks back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I laid on the pool table with all my buddies watching, while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery and then stuck a carrot up my butt?"

She said, "Erm no.. I'm your son's Math Teacher."

2006-12-09 10:26:17 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous

not dirty please

2006-12-09 10:23:56 · 4 answers · asked by Tim Tebow is Awesome 1

The singled room building is completely made of 1 way mirrors(as in one side you can see through it, one side you can see your reflection), walls, ceiling and floor. The reflection side is on the outside, and the see through side is on your side(you are inside the room.) So this singled room building is outside on a bright sunny day. So, can you see inside the room, or is it pitch black except where you look through the glass? I would like to actually do that one day.

The question is-- Would you be able see while in the room, and what would you see?

2006-12-09 10:22:50 · 5 answers · asked by Julia 4