Jokes & Riddles - August 2006

2006-08-07 00:55:36 · 24 answers · asked by ADRIAN H 3

2006-08-07 00:53:11 · 14 answers · asked by mdsubahi m 2

I wanna play a prank on my sister and her 13 year old friends. What would be some good pranks i could play on them to get them to think i work as an undercover spy agent?

2006-08-07 00:46:24 · 6 answers · asked by :ME: 2

2006-08-07 00:36:44 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

http://www.poqbum.com/RedButtonJoke/

go to this website and click the talk red button

2006-08-07 00:36:08 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

A man and his wife entered a dentist's office.
The wife said, "I want a tooth pulled. I don't want gas or Novocain because I'm in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible."

"You're a brave woman," said the dentist. "Now, show me which tooth it is."

The wife turns to her husband and says: "Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear."

2006-08-07 00:19:46 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

Jesus in a fit of rage slapped the blind man in the face and yelled, "Why don't you watch where you're going?"

Thereafter he did.

2006-08-07 00:06:41 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-07 00:05:57 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

I don't care if you are 17 or 47 you know what I am talking about.
Can they not see they are being perverts?
And yes I know where I placed this and It is because I want an honest ansewer. Where I am from they would be beat half to death and driven away but the law protects these preditors why do you think this is?

2006-08-06 23:50:23 · 11 answers · asked by CYNDIITA 3

hee hee

2006-08-06 23:46:55 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

Hi, I have put some jokes and other stuff on my personal website. Check it out and give me some feedback.

http://www.geocities.com/johncena_yo23/...

For the time being here is a joke.


Q. Why is it hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring and good-looking?
A. Because those men already have boyfriends!

Q. Which is the thinnest book in the world?
A. What men know about women.

Q. What did God say after creating men?
A. I can do better.

2006-08-06 23:32:17 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

He ate a cheese ham and baked bean toated sandwich then a marmite honey and egg toasted sandwich, then a bannana chicken and cornflake toasted sandwich then drops dead???

this is easy!

http://groups.msn.com/MARKLIFE

2006-08-06 23:23:02 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous

There were three little boys visiting their grandparents. The oldest came out and asked his grandpa, "Can you make a sound like a frog, Grand pappy?"

Grandpa (being in a kink of ill mood) responds, "No, I don't really want to make the sound of a frog now."

So, the second little boy comes out and asks his grandfather, "Will you please make a sound like a frog?"

Grandpa again says, "No, not now. I don't really want to do that. I'm in a grumpy mood. Maybe later."

Then the third little boy comes out and says, "Grandpa, oh please...please, please will you make a sound like a frog?"

"Why do all of you boys want me to make a sound like a frog?" Grandpa asked.

The smallest little boy replied with a hopeful face, "Well, Mom said that when you croak we get to go to Disney World!"

2006-08-06 23:04:00 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-06 22:59:49 · 21 answers · asked by MAK 6

Someone called me a w@nker the other day to which I replied "It's a pity your father wasn't" - it shut him up straight away.

What's your best? I'm expecting some good ones.

2006-08-06 22:46:29 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-06 22:41:29 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous

I think he's one of the funniest people out there, he should have his own show.

My favourite is "They have eating dogs for the anorexic now" - said to a blind lady with a guide dog.

2006-08-06 22:40:22 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-06 22:37:19 · 17 answers · asked by DNE 3

XX: Betty
XY:???

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

2006-08-06 22:32:14 · 27 answers · asked by big_dave_x 4

Break my @ss, and i'll kick your heart

2006-08-06 22:30:54 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-06 22:13:40 · 10 answers · asked by Selva R 1

2006-08-06 22:03:08 · 22 answers · asked by piyu 1

2006-08-06 22:00:38 · 5 answers · asked by Matt 3

What's the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?
Mechanical engineers build weapons.
Civil engineers build targets.

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The wireless telegraph is not difficult to understand. The ordinary telegraph is like a very long cat. You pull the tail in New York, and it meows in Los Angeles. The wireless is the same, only without the cat.


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2006-08-06 21:40:03 · 16 answers · asked by Happy Alf 3

Three blond women are stuck on an island, they find a magic lamp and a genie tells them hell grant them all one wish. The first one says "i wanna be smart enough to get off this island" so the genie turns her into a brown haired woman and she swims off the island, the second one says "I wish i was even smarter then her" so the genie turns her into a redhead and the red head builds a raft and floats off the island, The third blond says "i wanna be even smarter then the two of them combined" so the genie turns her into a man.......the man walks across the bridge =)


(rember its a JOKE so none of the angry women crap like my last post plz)

2006-08-06 21:24:32 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous

Get loose.

Okay I'mma stop running but please don't pull the trigger..

Sorry.

2006-08-06 21:19:57 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous

A child is born in Boston, Massachusetts to

parents who were both born in Boston, Massachusetts.

The child is not a United States citizen. How is

this possible?

2006-08-06 21:13:35 · 15 answers · asked by Tweety 1

like: My toe is longer than my finger


please make it super funny and retarded =]

2006-08-06 21:07:15 · 8 answers · asked by ß Pwned ß 1

Some people try to spin that they got served/shown up by not showing they were had by doing the before mentioned.

2006-08-06 20:45:15 · 28 answers · asked by rpspicks 1

One day Lone Ranger and his side kick Tonto were out riding when Lone Ranger jad to take a piss. So Lone Ranger goes over to the bush pulls down his pants and then he screams. He runs over to Tonto and says, "Tonto I've been bitten by a snake on my penis go to town and ask the doctor what to do."
So Tonto rides to town and goes to the doctor and says "Doctor, Lone Ranger has been bit by a snake what do I do?"

The doctor looks at Tonto and says, "You take a knife and make an x on the spot where he was bit, then you suck out the venim."

Tonto thanks the doctor and rides back to Lone Ranger and Lone Ranger asks "What did the doctor say?"

Tonto looks at Lone Ranger and says "Doctor say you gonna die!"

2006-08-06 20:34:57 · 19 answers · asked by chapped lips 5