Jokes & Riddles - August 2006

Because his wee wee was stuck in the chicken!

2006-08-08 06:58:12 · 8 answers · asked by Kubrickian 1

A little boy was doing his math homework.

He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a ***** is seven. Three plus six, that son of a ***** is nine...." His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?"
The little boy answered, "I'm doing my math homework, Mom." "And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked. "Yes," he answered.

Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in math?"
The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition." The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a ***** is four?" After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four.

2006-08-08 06:43:13 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-08 06:38:41 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-08 06:28:46 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous

WARNING: if anyone of u is too easily offended dont read further


A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."

"You foul-mouthed sex obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country....we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives.........

"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."

2006-08-08 06:21:49 · 13 answers · asked by simply_boring 4

seriously who built the ark

2006-08-08 06:11:10 · 28 answers · asked by kookookachoo_84 2

there are four men in a raft out at sea and they are starving. one day one of the men wake up and there is meat in the raft,.so the man eats the meat, they tell him it is albatrose. The man love's
it after a day the men are saved when the man gets back to land he is walking down the street and sees a sign that says fresh albatrose, when he sits down to eat it he has a heart attack and dies. my question is my did he have a heart attack?

2006-08-08 06:06:25 · 12 answers · asked by kallel 2

A guy gets power that what ever he think will happen. He thinks that his father should die and next minute he hears the news of his neighbour's death.

2006-08-08 06:04:15 · 14 answers · asked by _Guy_Comedy_ 1

They have 20 doors and you have to listen so that you pick the right doors. If you pick the two that match then you automatically win that prize!!

I have only heard it 3 times - so know 6 doors. But I have missed at least 3 games.

This is all that I have, but need help to get the missing ones.

1
2 Ipod Nano
3
4
5
6
7
8
9 Blige tix
10 Ipod Shuffle
11
12 LA trip
13 Ipod Shuffle
14
15
16
17
18 Lachey tix
19
20

Also - i dont know once a door has been given away, is it taken out of play?

See their website www.mix93.com for a list of the 10 prizes.

They play the game several times a day, but i havent figured out all of the play times yet. So let me know if you know, i think they are at least 10a, 12p, 1p, and 3p (with in that hour anyway).

2006-08-08 05:35:07 · 2 answers · asked by likes61 1

Three men have the same meal each and get a bill for 30 dollars. They pay 10 each. It is then discovered by staff that the bill should have been only 25. The waiter is told to take 5 singles back to them but decides to pocket 2 and give them back 3. This now means that they paid 9 each for their meal, totaling 27. Add 2 which the waiter took = 29. Where is the missing dollar?

2006-08-08 05:34:30 · 13 answers · asked by zd_sr1 2

2006-08-08 05:33:34 · 5 answers · asked by Jules 2

Well, are you?

2006-08-08 05:32:30 · 11 answers · asked by classical123 4

It Has To Be True And Not Mean

2006-08-08 05:32:06 · 23 answers · asked by hasfam28 1

I only ask because I put one in the freezer last night and It was dead this morning. ;-).......

2006-08-08 05:18:59 · 18 answers · asked by greebo 3

2006-08-08 05:03:50 · 24 answers · asked by Moi? 3

The bartender asks,"Olive or twist?"

2006-08-08 05:02:26 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-08 04:59:51 · 19 answers · asked by Moi? 3

funniest reply gets 10 points!

2006-08-08 04:55:14 · 23 answers · asked by chipz and gravy 2

2006-08-08 04:53:24 · 6 answers · asked by photonic_beam 4

To make the universe keep expanding.

2006-08-08 04:44:34 · 10 answers · asked by too_ugly_avenger 1

2006-08-08 04:29:56 · 7 answers · asked by texascowboyd 1

2006-08-08 04:22:48 · 8 answers · asked by John Blix 4

funny ones like from yo mamma

2006-08-08 04:20:15 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous

www.freewebs.com/sammydeea

2006-08-08 04:16:06 · 4 answers · asked by sammydeea 3

to get to the other side.

2006-08-08 04:00:06 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-08 03:49:54 · 16 answers · asked by sweetestthing 4

2006-08-08 03:45:02 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous

2006-08-08 03:31:19 · 17 answers · asked by ZONGO 1

you can tell by his pants.

2006-08-08 03:27:54 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous

A big game hunter woke up in the night and looked out of his tent. Coming towards him were two gleaming bright eyes. He got his gun and shot the creature right betwen them. Next morning there was no sign of a dead animal. Same thing happened the next night and the following day. On the third night the hunter held fire and flashed his torch. Coming towards him were two one-eyed lions.

2006-08-08 03:25:03 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous